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KK so 10 2011 DauvaHpc Luyen viet doan van bieu cam cho hgc sinh phd thong ThS LE XUAN SOAN TrQdng Dgi hpc Hdng Dulc 1 Khai nidm Van bieu cdm Vdn bidu dm li vdn vidt ra nhdm bidu dat tinh cim, cim xuc[.]
s o 10-2011 KK: DauvaHpc Luyen viet doan van bieu cam cho hgc sinh phd thong ThS LE XUAN SOAN TrQdng Dgi hpc Hdng Dulc Khai nidm Van bieu cdm Vdn bidu dm li vdn vidt nhdm bidu dat tinh cim, cim xuc, sU dinh gii cua ngUdi ddi vdi thd gidi xung quanh vd khdu ggi Idng ddng cim nOi ngUdi dgc Vdn bidu cim edn ggi li vdn trd tinh, bao gdm cie thd loai van hgc nhu tha trd tinh, ea dao trd tinh, but Tmh cim vdn bidu cim thudng li nhdng tinh cim dep tham nhuin tu tudng nhin van siu sic Ngoii bidu cam true tidp nhd tidng keu, Idi than, doan vdn bidu d m edn sQ dgng cdc bidn phdp tQ sQ, midu t l dd khPi gpi tinh d m (SGK NgQ Van 7, tap mdt) Dac diem cua doan van bieu cam 2.1 Mdi dogn vdn bieu e l m tap trung bieu dgt mpt tinh e l m chu yeu nhu ydu thidn nhidn, ydu lodi vdt, ydu ngudi, yeu thUdng trUdng Idp, bgn hQu, ydu gia dinh, ydu qud hUdng dat nUde, ghet thdi t l m thudng, ddc dc De bieu dgt tinh e l m d'y, ngudi vidt cd the chpn hinh I n h cd y nghTa an dg, tupng trUng (mpt dd vdt, mdt lodi cdy cd, mdt danh lam thing c i n h hay mdt hidn tupng nde dd) de gQi gam cam xuc, y nghT cua minh, trang trdi ndi Idng minh mpt cdch kin ddo hodc ndng hdu, manh Net, thid't tha Vi dg: Bdng San qua bio Tdm gUang" da li'y tdm gdOng lim dn du dd ea nggi nhdng ddc tinh tdt dgp eua eon ngddi eua tinh ban trung thue, chin thinh, thing thin, khdng ndi ddi, khdng njnh hdt hay ddc ie vdi bdt ed Ddng thdi tic gii ehl rd cd mdt gdng mdt dgp qui Id h^nh phuc luc soi gdng; ndu ed thdm mdt tdm hdn dep de dd soi vdo tdm gang lang tim thi hgnh phuc mdi that trgn ven" (NgQ Van 7/Tr-84,85) 2.2 Cung nhQ dogn van thudc cdc the logi khde, dogn vdn bieu e l m eung ed bd cgc ba p h i n Md doan: Cd the gidi thidu sQ vdt, cdnh vdt thdi gian vd khdng gian Cam xuc ban dau eua ngQdi vie't Phit tridn doan: Bieu Id cam xuc, y nghT mpt cdch eg the, chi tiet, sdu sac Kdt thuc doan: Kd't dpng cam xuc, y nghT eua minh 2.3 Dogn vdn bleu cam chf thUe sQ cd gid trj tinh cam vd t tdng hod quydn vdi chat che Cam xuc p h i i chdn thdt, sdng, tu tQdng phdi tien bd, dung d i n Cdu vdn, ldi vdn, gipng vdn phdi cd gid tri bieu elm - nghTa Id phdi phu hpp vdi npi dung b i l u cam Trong vdn bieu cam, tinh cam ngudi dd qua suy nghT, khde vdi trgng thdi, e l m xuc (bidu hi^n net mat cQchf) 2.4 Cd hai cdch (Idi) bieu cam: Bidu cim trdc tidp: Thdng qua cdch siJf dgng cac Xii elm: di, hdi, tdi, ta Tdc dgng bdc Id, bieu hidn tinh cam, thdi dp ddi vdi sQ vi0e ed lidn quan Dieu ndy thay ro nhat thd trQ tinh, but, ddi thoai npi tam eua nhdn vdt Trong bieu d m trQc tiep, ngQdi viet sQ dyng ngoi thuf nhd't: Tdi, em, chung em nhdm bpc lp thang cam xuc, b i n g Idi than thd, nhan nhii, hd hdo i di, hdi di Mi dif: Mg ai! Con khd qui mg ai! Sao me di liu thi ? Mai khdng vi I ngUdi ta danh eon vi eon ddm eUdp lai 66 chai eua eon md ngUdi ta giing ldy NgUdi ta lai cdn chdi con, chdi ci mg nda I Mg xa mg ed bidt khdng ? (Nguydn Hong) Bidu cim gidn tidp: Thdng qua each midu ta cit chi, dpng tde, thdi dp cua nhdn vdt vd tinh cam ciia ngi/di vidt Bieu d m gidn tidp cdn Id cdch bdc 16 tinh cam, cam xuc thdng qua hinh anh m^X phong c i n h , mpt cdu chuyen, mpt suy nghT VI dg: Dd li qud huang ta dang Idn tidng hit Tieng ngin nga ddi Idn td Idng di't d dd mdt gdc vjdn co ddi ciy siu ddng vi giin bdu dong da qua ndng, mot ngdy di xa, me ta da chdn nhdm eua ta thd ta mdi lot Idng (Nguydn Ngpc) Mac du vdy, bieu cam true tiep, bieu cam gian tiep khdng ddi ldp nhau, khdng tach rdi md d n dUpcbd sung cho de giup cho bieu cam sdu sac tinh te hdn luydn Viet doan van bieu cdm Cho de bdi: Phdt bleu cam nghTve bdi ea dao Din\ qua ddng bd ao 3.1 Xdc djnh y cho do§in van bidu cam Trudc het chung ta hinh dung cu the ddi tpng bil« cam cl ddy Id: Bdi ca dao Bdi ca dao d'y ndi ve long DayVnHpC '^C.AV NAY 8010-2011 -ô.*,.ãô.,, _,. thUdng nhd vd tinh e l m thuy chung cua nhdn vdt trQ tinh xa que hdng Hinh thdnh dupe d m xuc tinh cam cua minh sau dpc xong bdi ca dao Ldi vdn, gipng van p h i i bpc Id e l m xuc, tinh e l m chdn dpc hieu bdi dae: Bdi ca dao tham thfa bao ndi budn thUPng tha thie't, mong chd, nhd trdng Qua trinh tim hieu de Id qua trinh xac dinh y cho bai van bieu e l m y cua bai van nam tQ ngQ, hinh anh: Dem qua, ddng bd ao, trdng, budn trdng, budn (mQc dp tang din), rdi: oi, hdi, tdng, nhd ba nam, di mdn, da chang mdn; vd c l kdt d u ciia bdi ca dao Van de Id giao vien td chQc hQdng ddn nhU the ndo de hpc sinh phdt hipn cac y ehinh eua bdi ma de yeu d u Cd nhu vdy vide tim y, trien khai y mdi trd thdnh kT ndng d cac em Trdnh tinh trang viet doan lai khdng trung vdi y minh da xdc lap, vidt lan man, tQ ngO ngheo ^nan khdng gpi dQpc d m xuc, tinh cam eua ngu'di viet Chang hgn theo ydu d u cua de van tren ddy, gido vidn td ChQc cho cac em xdc djnh dQpc cdc y chinh: + Ndi cd dPn, budn vang, chd mong + C i n h vdt vdi ndi nhd ed hPng + SQ g i n bd thuy chung cua ngQdi IQ khdch ddi vdi gia dinh vd que hUPng + Ndi Idng cua nhan vat trQ tinh trorig bdi ca dao vd e l m xuc, tinh e l m eua tam hdn eon ngQdi NhQ vay, chung ta da xdc djnh cdc y bdi van bidu cam vd mdi y tren ddy cd the dpc xdy dQng bang mdt hoac hai dogn van 3.2 Xie djnh ciu chu di TQ nhQng y da dQpc xdc djnh trdn day, giao vien hQdng ddn cho hpc sinh tap vidt cdc cdu chu de Ddy Id khau quan trpng vide tgo lap dogn van Vi cd vie't dQdc cdu chu de thi mdi cd the trien khai y cua doan van vd iQa ehpn ndi dung trinh bdy cua dogn van TrQdc hd't, chung ta xdc djnh cdu ehii de mang tfnh khdi quat eho todn bdi van: Bdi ea dao "Dem qua ddng bd a o " d i i n t l bao ndi budn thQdng nhd, ed ddn vd Idng chung thuy cua ngQdi IQ khdch ddi vdi que nhd Ta xdc djnh cdu chu dd cho tQng dogn van nh sau: Ciu chu di 1: Tdm trgng cua ngUdi IQ khdch ludn le loi, trdng v i n g , chd trdng cQ vQPng v i n mdi khdng thdi Ciu ehu di Ndi nhd que nhd cua nhdn vdt trO tinh d i i n trien midn Ciu chu di 3: Ldi thd tham thfa bao ndi budn thUdng, nhd - tam Idng thuy ehung ddi vdi que nhd Ciu chu di 4: Tam Idng thuy chung tea sdng bdi ea vd tdm hdn ngQdi TQ dd, gido vidn djnh hQdng cho cdc em vie't cdc dogn van bang vide IQa ehpn ede phep lien kd't, phQdng tidn lidn kd't, tQ ngQ lien kd't, v.v 3.3 Lien kdt doan van vi cich dung td ngd xiy ddng doan van Cung nhu cdc kieu van b i n khde, bdi van bleu e l m Id mpt the thdng nhd't ve hinh thQc, hodn chfnh ve ndi dung Trong dd, dogn van ed mdt vai trd he't sQc quan trpng trpng vide d u thdnh mdt van b i n bieu d m hcdn chfnh V] vgy, cdc cdu, cdc dogn van b i n p h i i lidn kdt vdi mdt each chat che Ren kT ndng vidt doan van vd vide sQ dgng cae each lien kdt Id mpt thao tdc khdng the thieu dUdc Vi vgy dogn van Md bdi Than bai, Kd't bai ed the dUpc viet theo cdc cdch nh sau: 3.3.1 Cach Viet dogn Md bdi Trudc hdt p h i i ndi ring md bdi hay nha't, bieu e l m hay nhd't la dat hai yeu d u sau: tfnh khdi quat, tfnh djnh hu'dng Chang hgn, day Id mpt dogn van md bdi: TQ luc Ipt Idng, cdn nam tren ndi, ta da dQpc nghe nhQng Idi ru ngpt ngao, xuc dpng cua bd, ciia me: d di, "Anh di anh nhd que nhi" Ldi ru ay cQ gidng mIc mai ldng ta Bdi ca dao: "Dem qua ddng bd ao" cdn Id mdt kf niem khdng phai md tdm trf tdi tQ thud be thP Ldn len, tdi v i n thQdng ru em nh the: Dem qua ddng bd ao, Tdo Khe ndc chay hay cdn trd trd Dogn van tren dpc viet theo Idi bieu cam true tiep: bieu Id cam xuc, tinh e l m eua ngUdi vidt thdng qua vide sQ dgng cdc tQ ngQ: ta da dQdc nghe khdng phai md tdm trf tdi tQ thud be thd 3.3.2 Cdch vidt doan Than bai Than bai gdm nhieu dogn van, mdi dogn ndu Idn mdt khfa cgnh, mdt net e l m nghT ciia ngQdi vie't ddi vdi ddi tQpng bieu d m Cam nghT phai dupe phdn tfch vd minh hoa bang nhQng chi tie't cg the Cd each dQng doan neu d m nghT Id: Doan cam nghT diin djch, Doan cam nghi quy nap, Doan cim nghT tdng phin - hgp a Doan cam nghT diin djch:D\ XQ e l m nghT, neu d m nghT tiep theo phan tfch, minh hog cg the Cam nghT dupe d i i n dgt eau chdt eua dogn Vf dg: Ba li ngUdi mi em yeu quy nhi't I Chuyen d nha hay Idp em ludn hdi y kidn bi vi ludn nhin dugc ldi khuyen dung din, y nghTa Dd li nhdng Idi khuyen ri't hay vi cudc sdng, vi xi hdi vi cich eU xd vdi ngUdi tren, ngUdi dUdi phai nhudng nhjn, li phep eho phai Nhdng lan dUge diem mdi em thudng chay vio nhi, khoe vdi ba Luc dd bd da khdng gidu ndi niim vui sUdng tu hdo vi em b Doan cam nghT quy nap: Di tQ cg the den khdi quat Cdc cdu dQng d i u dogn nham cg the minh hpa cho cdu chd't ndu elm nghTd eudi dogn Vi dg: Ddi bdng mdt cua vdn dda, chung tdi ddnh ddo, chai d ngudi Idn dgn chidu, Idt dem bay tide mdng Nhiiu chdng trai, cd gdi ngdi tim tinh, trao ddi ri't nen tha Lim tdi quen ddOc nhdng ky niem, nhdng hinh anh trin day niim vui ay e Doan cim nghT tdng phin - hgp Phin d i u dogn e l m nghT neu ldn mdt e l m nghT tdng quat NhQng edu van tidp theo giai thfch, minh hpa eho d m nghT tdng qudt dd Cdng ve cudi dogn, ngQdi vidt tdng hpp vd ndng cao e l m nghT Vf dg: Doan van d m nghT ve nhdn vdt ed be bdn diem (NgQ van 8-Tdp 1) Trudc eanh ngd ngheo khd, ca cUe eua cd be, Idng tdi dau nhd thit lai Cd Id nio ta lai khdng cam thdy xdt xa s o 10-2011 DauvaHpi — - nghT vi hinh inh mdt cd be mdt minh bo va gida m^t khdng gian mdnh mdng ddm tdi, ret cit da, cit thjt Trong mgi ngudi dugc sum viy vui vi cie cdn nha dm dp, bdn Id sdi kia, thi em bd phii m^t minh di bin nhdng bao didm, em ching duge quan tim dd y Cinh ngg dd cua em be cdng trd ndn dau ddn tim ta han, vi nd lai xiy mdt ddm giao thda, tdt ei niim vui vi sU diy dii ua vio nhdng cin nhi dm cung Qud trinh vidt dogn than bai, gido vidn luu y hpc sinh: gipng van, hdi vdn bieu e l m khdng gd bd, khd khan, d i m b i o dQpc cdc ydu d u dien dat, dung tQ, dat cdu, IQa chpn cac ddc didm, ndi dung trinh bay cua dogn van NghTa Id thudc vao mgch d m xuc cua ngUdi vidt md cd each iQa chpn cho thich hpp TQ dd bdi trdn ddy, ta cd the vidt cdc dogn van thdn bai nhQ sau (iQu y mdi dogn van dQpc vidt phdi xuit phat tQ cac y da tim dQpc d p h i n trdn) Doan vdn 1: Thao thQc, Id loi, chf bidt dQng bd ao, nPi vang ve d cudi sdn, ngd sau hay bd ao CQ trdng g i n , trdng xa, nhQng ndo thiy, vi "ca lan, md" tQ bao gid Cdc didp tQ (trdng, cd, sao) gpi Idn Idng IQ khdch sQ budn v i n g , chdi vdi • Ddm qua ddng bd ao Trdng ed cd ldn, trdng sao md" Ndi nidm d'y mdi chf dien "dem qua", edn d i y vdi Idng GiQa ddm khuya trdng v i n g , khdng mpt ngQdi thdn thQPng, chf cdn bid't "budn trdng" vd khd thdt Idn: "Budn trdng nhdn gidng Nhdn Pi, nhdn hdi nhen chd mdi ?" Nhdn cdn be ti Nhdn sap t h i u hieu ndi budn nhd ec ddn cua ke xa que hQdng Ddm da ve khuya, mai dd "chdnh ehd'eh" n i m nghidng nghidng trdn b l u trdi Rdi "sao md" s i p tdn canh Vdn chf mdt minh li khdch ed ddn vd trp trpi Lgi "budn trdng" Idn bau trdi, hdi "sao mai" de trang t r i i Idng minh: Budn trdng chenh chich mai, Sao ai, hdi nhd md ? Ndi budn nhd que hUdng, ngUdi than khdng kd xiet! Sau Idi e l m thdn "nhdn di, nhdn hdi ?", "sao di, hdi ?" Id nhOng tidng khd thd ddi, d t Idn, nhQng gipt Id rng rng rPi xudng Dd Id tdm trgng le loi, trdng vdng, chd trdng cQ vQdng v i n mdi khdng thdi Cdu in dam dogn vdn trdn Id cdu chu de (cdn gpi Id cdu chdt) dQng d vj tri cudi dogn cd tde dgng khdi qudt e l m xuc tdm trang eua ngudi IQ khdch dQpc d i i n gidi d cdc edu trdn Cdu chdt ndy chlnh Id cdu ehu dd md ta da xdc dinh d p h i n trdn Doan bidu cam tidp theo: Ndi nhd que nhd cua nhdn vdt trQ tinh cQ dien tridn midn Khdng chf mdi "ddm qua" md dien "ddm ddm" Khdng chf mpt thdng, mdt nam md Id da "ba nam trdn" , mpt thdi gian ddi Khdng chf "budn trdng" md Id "tQdng", Id " nhd", day dQt trien midn, khdng ngudi ChQ tQdng Id mdt net tdm trang budn nhd, ngdng trdng vd cung da diet: "Dem dem tdng dii Ngin Hi Chudi Tinh Dau di ba nam rdi" Den dogn van ndy cdu chu de Igi dgt dau dogn de ndu ldn "ndi nhd" mang tinh khdi qudt nhat, hdm xuc JNGAY NA nhit cho todn dogn vdn Dogn vin thd ba: Hai edu cudi Id hinh I n h tPng p h i n rat ddc sac: "d mdn" vdi "dg c h i n g mdn": "Di mdn nhdng dg ching mdn Tia Khd nddc ehiy hiy edn tra tra" Ldi thd t h i m thia bao ndi budn thQdng nhd vd cd dd - dd Id t l m Idng thQdng nhd, thuy chung ddi vdi qud nha Nhu vdy, md hinh cd b i n cua dogn vdn bieu cam h d i i n djch vd quy ngp Nd phu hpp vdi mach cdm xuc, tinl e l m eua ngudi vidt Dd vidt dupe dogn vdn theo cdc cad trdn, thi ngUdi vidt p h i i bdm sdt cdc y cua bdi, rdi luy§i vidt vdi tQng y chlnh da dQpc xdc djnh vd cdc cdu chii di da dupe xdc ldp ban d i u 3.3.3 Cich vidt dogn Kdt bii Dogn vdn kdt bdi ndu Idn cdm nghT chung, cd the ddnh gid vd lidn hd- VI vdy, dd cd dupe mOt bdi vdn hodr chfnh khdng thd khdng vidt dogn kdt bdi TQ cdu chil dd da xdc djnh dupe nhQ d trdn, ta cd the vidt dogn dogn kdt bdi nhQ sau: Ca dao Id mijt t l m Idng "Tdo Khd nude chay hay c6r trd trd" Id tam Idng cua nhdn ddn, cua nhQng xa gin eua dng tdi, bd tdi, mp tdi, chj em t6i._ T l m Idng son sd thu'y chung ddi vdi gia dinh, qud hUPng ludn toa sane bdi ea dao vd tdm hdn ngudi Tdm Igi, Ydu d u ed b i n phdt bieu cam nghTkhonc the ndi chung chung md rat cg the thai dp yeu thlch, thu vi, budn vui d chd ndo, tgi lai ydu thich, thu vj? vd phdi phdn tfch, trfch ddn cu the, thuydt phyc, Cd luc phdi khen, chd Khen, chd chinh Id vidt ldi binh Gido vidn qua nhQng bdi gidng cu the, qua viec hudng dan dpc sdch se giup cac em ldm quen d i n each binh vdn, bidn thdnh kT ndng, kT xao Luc ndo vidt di/(?c Idi binh hay, sdu sde thi bdi cam nghT mdi thQc sQ mang ve dpp trf tud Cung cd phai bid't lidn tudng so sdnh: TQ hien tQpng ndy md nghT, md nhd ddn hidn tpng khde tQc la lidn tQdng, Vidt Idi binh, so sdnh, lidn tQdng Id thao tdc cd ban van b i l u d m Tai ligu tham khio Nguydn Thanh Hung - Van nghj ludn trUdng d p 2, NXB Gido dgc, 1995 Phan Trpng Ludn - PhQdng phdp day hpc Van, NXB Gido dgc, 1995 Ld Xudn Soan - Ren luyen kT nang viet doan van eho hpc sinh phd thdng, NXB Dgi hpc Qudc gia TP Ho Chf Minh, 2007 Dd Ngpc Thdng, Phan Minh Didu - Van midu ta nhd trudng phd thong NXB Gido dye, 2003 Cao Bfch Xuan - Cdc dang bdi Tdp ldm van va e l m thy thP van Idp 8, NXB Gido dye, 2004 ... dogn van 3.2 Xie djnh ciu chu di TQ nhQng y da dQpc xdc djnh trdn day, giao vien hQdng ddn cho hpc sinh tap vidt cdc cdu chu de Ddy Id khau quan trpng vide tgo lap dogn van Vi cd vie''t dQdc cdu... chang mdn; vd c l kdt d u ciia bdi ca dao Van de Id giao vien td chQc hQdng ddn nhU the ndo de hpc sinh phdt hipn cac y ehinh eua bdi ma de yeu d u Cd nhu vdy vide tim y, trien khai y mdi trd thdnh... d m xuc, tinh cam eua ngu''di viet Chang hgn theo ydu d u cua de van tren ddy, gido vidn td ChQc cho cac em xdc djnh dQpc cdc y chinh: + Ndi cd dPn, budn vang, chd mong + C i n h vdt vdi ndi nhd