The safest place in any vehicle is the middle of the backseat, which is why, when you have the choice, that’s where your baby should be sitting. But if that seat’s not always available
(because you have more than one baby, for instance), or if your vehicle doesn’t have a middle seat in the back (because it has captain’s chairs instead), a seat on either side of the back (in a correctly installed and used child safety seat) is the next safest thing.
But what if your car comes equipped with side air bags, as more and more vehicles do?
Though the data isn’t available yet to show that side air bags can injure young children when
they inflate, crash tests show that they may. To play it safe—the only way to play it when there’s a baby onboard—ask your dealer about turning your side air bags off. (Side-curtain air bags, however, don’t appear to pose a risk to young children.)
BURPING BABY
Milk isn’t all baby swallows when sucking on a nipple. Along with that nutritive fluid comes nonnutritive air, which can make a baby feel uncomfortably full before he or she’s finished a meal.
That’s why burping baby to bring up any excess air that’s accumulated—every couple of ounces when bottle feeding, and between breasts when Breastfeeding (or midbreast, if a young infant is managing only one breast at a time)—is such an important part of the feeding process. There are three ways this is commonly done—on your shoulder, facedown on your lap, or sitting up—and it’s a good idea to try them all to see which works most efficiently for both you and baby. Though a gentle pat or rub may get the burp up for most babies, some need a slightly firmer hand.
On your shoulder. Hold baby firmly against your shoulder, firmly supporting the buttocks with one hand and patting or rubbing the back with the other.
Facedown on your lap. Turn baby facedown on your lap, stomach over one leg, head resting on the other. Holding him or her securely with one hand, pat or rub with the other.
An over-the-shoulder burp yields best results for many babies, but don’t forget to protect your clothes.
The lap-burp position has the added benefit of being soothing to some colicky infants.
Sitting up. Sit baby on your lap, head leaning forward, chest supported by your arm as you hold him or her under the chin. Pat or rub, being sure not to let baby’s head flop backward.
Even a newborn can sit up for a burp—but be sure the head gets adequate support.
DIAPERING BABY
Especially in the early months, the time for a change can come all too often—sometimes hourly during baby’s waking hours. But as tedious a chore as it can be for both baby and you, frequent changes
(taking place, at the very least, before or after every daytime feeding and whenever there’s a bowel movement) are the best way to avoid irritation and diaper rash on that sensitive bottom. Telling when it’s time for a change is easier if you’re using cloth diapers, since they feel wet when they are wet. If you’re using disposable diapers, however, you’ll probably have to take a closer look (and sniff) to gauge wetness; since they’re much more absorbent, they tend not to feel wet until they’re seriously saturated. Waking a sleeping baby to change a diaper is hardly ever necessary, and unless baby’s very wet and uncomfortable or has had a bowel movement, you don’t need to change diapers at nighttime feedings; the activity and light involved can interfere with baby’s getting back to sleep.
To ensure a change for the better whenever you change your baby’s diaper:
1. Before you begin to change a diaper, be sure everything you need is at hand, either on the changing table or, if you’re away from home, in your diaper bag. Otherwise, you could end up
removing a messy diaper only to find out you have nothing to clean the mess with. You will need all or some of the following:
a clean diaper
cotton balls and warm water for babies under one month (or those with diaper rash) and a small towel or dry washcloth for drying; diaper wipes for other babies
Disposables make quick work of diapering. Once baby is in place, simply bring the front of the diaper through baby’s legs and fasten, making sure the tabs are pressed down securely.
a change of clothes if the diaper has leaked (it happens with the best of them); clean diaper wraps or waterproof pants if you’re using cloth diapers
ointment or cream, if needed, for diaper rash; lotions and powders are unnecessary. Be careful with diaper creams because if you get some on the tabs of the disposable diaper, it can interfere with their sticking power (this, of course, is not an issue if you’re using diapers with Velcro tabs).
2. Wash and dry your hands before you begin, if possible, or give them a once-over with a diaper wipe.
3. Have baby entertainment available—live or otherwise. Live shows (cooing, funny faces, songs) can be provided by the diaper changer or by siblings, parents, or friends on hand. Diversion can also come in the form of a mobile hanging over the changing table, a stuffed toy or two in baby’s range of vision (and later, within reach), a music box, a mechanical toy—whatever will hold your baby’s interest long enough for you to take off one diaper and put on another. But don’t use items such as powder or lotion containers for distraction, since an older baby may grab and mouth or upend them.
4. Spread a protective cloth diaper or a changing cloth if you are changing baby anywhere but on a changing table. Wherever you make the change, be careful not to leave baby unattended, not even for a moment. Even strapped to a changing table, your baby shouldn’t be out of arm’s reach.
5. Unfasten the diaper, but don’t remove it yet. First survey the scene. If there’s a bowel
movement, use the diaper to wipe most of it away, keeping the diaper over the penis as you work if your baby is a boy. Now fold the diaper under baby with the unsoiled side up to act as a protective surface, and clean baby’s front thoroughly with warm water or a wipe, being sure to get into all the creases; then lift both legs, clean the buttocks, and slip the soiled diaper out and a fresh diaper under before releasing the legs. (Keep a fresh diaper over a penis for as much of this process as possible, in self-defense. Baby boys often get erections during diaper changes; this is perfectly normal, and not a sign that they’re being overstimulated.) Pat baby dry if you used water. Make sure baby’s bottom is completely dry before putting on his or her diaper or any ointments or creams. If you note any irritation or rash, see page 269 for treatment tips.
6. If you’re using cloth diapers, they’re probably prefolded and ready to use. But you may have to fold them further until your baby is a bit bigger. The extra fabric should be in the front for boys and the back for girls. To avoid sticking baby when using pins (there are pins made especially to
minimize this possibility), hold your fingers under the layers of diaper as you insert the pin. Sticking the pins in a bar of soap while you’re making the change will make them slip more smoothly through the fabric. Once a pin becomes dull, discard it. Better still, look for diapers or diaper covers with Velcro fasteners. See page 23 for other options.
If you’re using paper diapers with sticky tabs be careful not to let the tape stick on baby’s skin. Or look for those that use Velcro fasteners instead, so you can open and close them with ease.
Diapers and protective pants should fit snugly to minimize leaks, but not so snugly that they rub or irritate baby’s delicate skin. Telltale marks will warn you that the diaper is too tight.
Putting clothes over baby’s head
Wetness will be less likely to creep up to drench undershirt and clothing on boys if the penis is aimed downward as the diaper is put on. If the umbilical stump is still attached, fold the diaper down to expose the raw area to air and keep it from getting wet.
7. Dispose of diapers in a sanitary way. Used disposable diapers can be folded over, tightly reclosed, and dropped into a diaper pail or the garbage can. Used cloth diapers should be kept in a tightly covered diaper pail (your own, or one supplied by the diaper service) until pickup or wash day. If you’re away from home, they can be held in a plastic bag until you get home.
8. Change baby’s clothing and/or bed linen as needed.
9. Wash your hands with soap and water, when possible, or clean them thoroughly with a diaper wipe.
DRESSING BABY
With floppy arms, stubbornly curled-up legs, a head that invariably seems larger than the openings provided by most baby clothes, and an active dislike for being naked, an infant can be a challenge to dress and undress. But there are ways of making these daily tasks less of a chore for both of you:
Putting baby’s arms in sleeves
1. Select clothes with easy-on, easy-off features in mind. Wide neck openings or necks with snap closings are best. Snaps or a zipper at the crotch make dressing and diaper changes easier. Sleeves should be fairly loose, and a minimum of fastening (particularly up the back) should be necessary.
Clothes made of stretch or knit fabrics are often easier to put on than stiff garments with less give.
2. Make changes only when necessary. If you find the odor from frequent spit-ups offensive, sponge the spots lightly with a diaper wipe rather than changing outfits every time baby has a
productive burp. Or try guarding against such incidents by putting a large bib on baby during and after feedings.
3. Dress baby on a flat surface, such as a changing table, bed, or crib mattress. And have some entertainment available.
4. Consider dressing time a social time, too. Light, cheerful conversation (a running commentary on what you’re doing, for instance) can help distract baby from the discomforts and indignities of being dressed and make cooperation more likely. Making a learning game out of pulling on clothes will team distraction with stimulation. And punctuating your commentary with loud kisses (a smooch for each adorable hand and foot as it appears from the sleeve or pants leg) can add to the fun for both of you.
5. Stretch neck openings with your hands before attempting to get baby into a garment. Ease, rather than tug, them on and off, keeping the opening as wide as possible in the process and trying to avoid snagging the ears or nose. Turn the split second during which baby’s head is covered, which might otherwise be scary or uncomfortable, into a game of peekaboo (“Where is Mommy? Here she is!” and then, as baby gets old enough to realize that he or she is equally invisible to you, “Where is Daniella? Here she is!”).
6. Try to reach into sleeves and pull baby’s hands through, rather than trying to shove rubbery little arms into limp cylinders of cloth. A game here, too (“Where is Brandon’s hand? Here it is!”), will help distract and educate when baby’s hands temporarily disappear.
7. When pulling a zipper up or down, draw the garment away from baby’s body to avoid pinching tender skin.
EAR CARE
The old adage “Never put anything smaller than your elbow in your ears” is advocated not only by grandmothers but also by modern medical authorities as well. They agree that putting anything in the ear that fits—whether it’s a dime inserted by a curious toddler or a cotton swab inserted by a well- meaning parent—is dangerous. Do wipe your baby’s outer ears with a washcloth or cotton ball, but don’t try to venture into the ear canal itself with swabs, fingers, or anything else. The ear is naturally self-cleaning, and trying to remove wax by probing may only force it farther into the ear. If wax seems to be accumulating, ask the doctor about it at the next visit.
LIFTING AND CARRYING BABY
For those who have never carried a tiny baby, the experience can, at first, prove very unnerving. But it can be equally unnerving for the baby. After months of being moved gently and securely in the snug uterine cocoon, being plucked up, wafted through the open air, and plunked down can come as quite a shock. Particularly when adequate support isn’t provided for the head and neck, this can result in baby having a frightening sensation of falling and, consequently, a startle reaction. So a good infant- carrying technique aims at carrying baby not only in a way that is safe, but also in a way that feels safe.
Be sure to carefully support the neck and back with your arm when lifting a baby who is lying faceup.
You’ll eventually develop techniques for carrying your baby that are comfortable for both of you, and carrying will become a completely natural experience. While you are sorting laundry, using the computer, or reading labels in the supermarket, baby will be casually slung over your shoulder or under your arm, feeling as secure as he or she did in utero. In the awkward interim, however, these tips will help:
Picking baby up. Before you even touch your baby, make your presence known through voice or eye contact. Being lifted unaware by unseen hands to an unknown destination can be unsettling.
Slip one hand under the chin and neck and the other under the bottom to pick up a baby lying facedown.
Let baby adjust to the switch in support from mattress (or other surface) to arms by slipping your
hands under him or her (one under head and neck, the other under bottom) and keeping them there for a few moments before actually lifting.
Slide the hand under baby’s head down the back so that your arm acts as a back and neck support, and your hand cradles the buttocks. Use the other hand to support the legs, and lift baby gently toward your body, caressing as you go. By bending over to bring your body closer, you will limit the distance your baby will have to travel in midair—and the discomfort that comes with it.
Carrying baby comfortably. A small baby can be cradled very snugly in just one arm (with your hand on baby’s bottom, and your forearm supporting back, neck, and head) if you feel secure that way.
With a larger baby, you both may be more comfortable if you keep one hand under legs and buttocks and the other supporting back, neck, and head (your hand encircling baby’s arm, your wrist under the head).
Some babies prefer the shoulder carry, all the time or some of the time. It’s easy to get baby up there smoothly with one hand on the buttocks, the other under head and neck. Until baby’s head becomes self-supporting, you will have to provide the support. But this can be done even with one hand if you tuck baby’s bottom into the crook of your elbow and run your arm up the back with your hand supporting the head and neck.
The front carry is a favorite with babies, since it allows them a view of the world.
Even fairly young babies enjoy the front-face carry, in which they can watch the world go by, and many older babies prefer it. Face your baby out, keeping one hand across his or her chest, pressed back against your own, and the other supporting baby’s bottom.
When baby gets older and can carry his or her own weight well, the hip carry leaves the carrier with a free hand.
The hip carry gives you freedom to use one hand for chores while carrying an older baby resting on your hip. (Avoid this hold if you have lower-back problems.) Hold baby snugly against your body with one arm, resting his bottom on your hip.
Putting baby back down. Hold baby close to your body as you bend over the crib or carriage (again to limit the midair travel distance), one hand on baby’s bottom, one supporting back, neck, and head.
Keep hands in place for a few moments until baby feels the comfort and security of the mattress, then slip them out. A few light pats or a bit of gentle hand pressure (depending on what seems to please your baby most), a few parting words if baby’s awake, and you’re ready to make the break. (For more tips on putting a sleeping baby down without waking him or her, see page 185.)
NAIL TRIMMING
Although trimming a newborn’s tiny fingernails may make most new parents uneasy, it’s a job that must be done. Little hands with little control and long fingernails can do a lot of damage, usually in the form of scratches on his or her own face.
An infant’s nails are often overgrown at birth (it’s hard to get a trim in utero) and so soft that cutting through them is nearly as easy as cutting through a piece of paper. Getting your baby to hold still for the procedure, however, won’t be so easy. Cutting a baby’s nails while he or she is sleeping may work if you’ve got a sound sleeper or if you don’t mind waking him or her. When baby’s awake, it’s best to trim the nails with the help of an assistant who can hold each hand as you cut. Always use a special baby nail scissor or baby nail clipper which has rounded tips—if baby starts to bolt at the wrong moment, no one will be jabbed with a sharp point. To avoid nipping the skin as you clip the nail, press the finger pad down and out of the way as you cut. Even with this precaution you may, however, occasionally draw blood—most parents do at one time or another. If you do, apply pressure with a sterile gauze pad until bleeding stops; a Band-Aid probably won’t be needed.
NOSE CARE
As with the inside of the ears, the inside of the nose is self-cleaning and needs no special care. If there is a discharge, wipe the outside, but do not use cotton swabs, twisted tissues, or your fingernail to try to remove material from inside the nose—you may only push the matter back farther into the