International interviewing and counseling 9th ivey chapter 03

Introduction: Attending Behavior: The Foundation Skill of Listening slide 1 of 4 ▲Attending behavior is supporting your client with individually and culturally appropriate verbal follo

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Intentional Interviewing and Counseling:

Facilitating Client Development in a

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Chapter 3

Attending and Empathy Skills

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Awareness and Knowledge

▲ Develop a solid understanding of how attending behavior, attention, and selective attention form the basis for all counseling and therapy.

▲ Understand how basics of neuroscience explain and expand the importance of attention.

▲ Learn how teaching microskills of listening is a useful therapeutic strategy.

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Chapter Goals and Competency Objectives (slide 2 of 2)

Skills and Action

▲Increase your skill in listening to clients, and communicate that interest

▲ Establish an empathic relationship with your clients

▲ Adapt your attending patterns to the needs of varying individual and cultural styles of listening and talking

▲ Develop recovery skills that you can use when you are lost or confused in the session Even the most advanced professional doesn’t always know what is happening When you don’t know what to do, attend!

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Introduction: Attending Behavior: The Foundation Skill of Listening (slide

1 of 4)

▲Attending behavior is supporting your client with individually and culturally appropriate verbal

following, visuals, vocal quality, and body language/facial expression

▲Listening is the core skill of attending behavior and is central to developing relationships and

making real contact with clients

▲Listening is more than hearing

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2 of 4)

▲ One way to understand good quality listening is to experience the opposite—poor listening.

 Find a partner to role-play a session

 Spend 3 minutes role-playing a poor and ineffective listener

 After the role-play session, ask the “client” how he or she felt “inside” or emotionally when the

“counselor” did not listen

 If no partner is available, think of a specific time when you felt that you were not heard.

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3 of 4)

▲When you use the microskills, you can anticipate how a client is likely to respond

▲Attending behavior has predictable results in conversations with clients

▲These predictions are never perfect, but research has shown we can generally expect specific results from various types of helping interventions (Daniels, 2010)

▲If your first attempt at listening is not received well, you can intentionally flex and use a

different skill

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4 of 4)

Attending Behavior : Support your client with

individually and culturally appropriate visuals,

vocal quality, verbal tracking, and body

language, including facial expression

Anticipated Result: Clients will talk more freely and respond openly, particularly about topics to which attention is given Depending on the individual client and culture, eye contact, vocal tone, completeness of story, and body language will vary

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Awareness, Knowledge, and Skills of Attending Behavior and Empathy

Skills

▲ Attention is the connective force of conversations and empathic understanding

▲ We are touched when it is present

▲ We know when someone is not attending to us

▲ Attending behavior is the first and most critical skill of listening

 It is a necessary part of all interviewing, counseling, and psychotherapy

▲ Sometimes listening carefully is enough to produce change

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▲ To communicate that you are

listening or attending to the client,

you need the following:

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3 V’s + B (slide 2 of 4)

▲“3 V’s + B”

1. Visual/eye contact Look at people when you speak to them.

2. Vocal qualities Communicate warmth and interest with your voice

3. Verbal tracking Track the client’s story Don’t change the subject; stay with the client’s

topic

4. Body language/facial expression Be yourself: authenticity is essential to building trust

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3 V’s + B (slide 3 of 4)

▲The 3 V’s + B reduce counselor talk time and provide clients with an opportunity to tell detailed stories

▲Increase awareness of clients’ attending patterns

 Note clients’ patterns of eye contact, changing vocal tone, body language, and topics to which your clients attend and those they avoid.

 Note individual and cultural differences in attending.

▲Attending behavior and listening are essential for human communication, but we need to be prepared for and expect individual and cultural differences

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3 V’s + B (slide 4 of 4)

▲ Listen before you leap!

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Visual/Eye Contact

▲ Observe cultural differences in appropriate amounts of eye contact.

▲ Maintain and break eye contact as needed for specific results.

▲ Observe clients’ pupils for dilation.

▲ Use specific body language to achieve desired results.

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Vocal Qualities: Tone and Speech Rate

▲Changes in pitch and volume, speech breaks and hesitations, and speech rate can convey your emotional reactions to the client

▲Verbal underlining: the key words a person underlines by means of volume and emphasis.

 Expect some significant things to be said more softly.

 Expect a lower volume when a client is talking about difficult issues.

 Match vocal tone to client’s in these cases.

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▲ What are your reactions to the following accents: Australian, British English, Canadian, French, Pakistani, Castilian Spanish, New England, Southern United States?

▲ Avoid stereotyping people with accents different from yours.

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Body Language: Attentive and Authentic

▲ Like eye contact, body language patterns differ according to culture.

▲ Maintain culturally appropriate distance.

▲ Note client’s movements in relation to you.

▲ Note your own body language patterns in the session.

▲ Maintain authenticity in the client relationship.

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Verbals: Following the Client or Changing the Topic

▲Verbal tracking is staying with your client’s topic to encourage full elaboration of the narrative

▲Selective Attention

 Selective attention is central to interviewing, counseling, and psychotherapy.

 Clients will talk about what counselors are willing to hear.

 How you attend determines the length of the session and whether the client will return.

 Observe the selective attention patterns of both you and your clients What do your clients focus on? What topics do they seem to avoid? Ask yourself the same questions .

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The Value of Redirecting Attention

▲There are times when it is inappropriate to attend to client statements

 For example, a client may talk insistently about the same topic over and over again

▲Through failure to maintain eye contact, subtle shifts in posture and vocal tone, and deliberate jumps to more positive topics, you can facilitate the interview process

▲Redirect the conversation to focus on positive assets

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The Usefulness of Silence

▲ Sometimes the most useful thing you can do is to support your client

silently.

▲ Search for a natural break in the client’s speech and attend appropriately.

▲The auditory cortex in the brain remains active when you are attending to silence.

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Talk Time

▲ Clients can’t talk while you do.

▲ Review your sessions for talk time

Who talks more, you or your client?

 With adults: Client > Counselor.

– With less verbal clients or children, you may expect: Client < Counselor.

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Training as Treatment: Social Skills, Psychoeducation, and Attending Behavior

▲Social skills training is training in a specific set of psychoeducational strategies oriented toward teaching clients an array of interpersonal skills and behaviors

 These skills include a wide range of behaviors, such as listening, dating behaviors, drug refusal skills,

assertiveness, mediation, and job interviewing procedures

▲Virtually all interpersonal actions can be taught through social skills training

▲Training as treatment is a term that summarizes the method and goal of social skills training.

▲Implications for your practice: Many clients can benefit from training and education in listening

skills

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Empathy: Awareness, Knowledge, and Skills (slide 1 of 3)

Empathy : Experiencing the client’s world and story

as if you were that client; understanding his or

her key issues and expressing them

accurately, without adding your own thoughts,

feelings, or meanings This requires attending

and observation skills plus using the important

key words of the client while distilling and

shortening the main ideas.

Anticipated Result: Clients will feel understood and be more engaged in exploring their issues Empathy

is best assessed by a client’s reaction to a statement and his or her ability to continue the discussion in more depth and, eventually, with better self-understanding.

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a response may be a congruent idea or frame of reference that helps the client see a new

perspective

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▲This 3-point scale is often expanded for classifying and rating the quality of empathy shown in a session:

(Basic)Level

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Neuroscience and Empathy

▲Empathy is identifiable through functional magnetic resonance imaging and other key

technologies

▲Key to this process are the mirror neurons, which fire when humans or animals act and when

they observe actions by another

▲When listening skills are not successfully implemented, empathy falls apart

▲Listening and empathy are not just abstract concepts: they are measureable and make a

difference in people’s lives

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Observe: Attending Behavior and Empathy in Action

What do you think about Allen’s positive and negative interviewing examples?

▲Were they effective in developing a good working relationship with Azara?

▲What differences did you notice in Azara’s reaction to the first and second session segments?

▲What are the major differences between the negative and the positive examples?

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Attending and Empathy in Challenging Situations

▲ You may think that attending skills are simple and obvious, and may be anxious to move to the “hard stuff.”

▲ Cognitive learning through reading and study does not mean one has the skills and

is really able to listen to clients empathically.

▲ Effective listening takes time, commitment, and intentional and deliberate practice.

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The Samurai Effect, Magic, and the Importance of Practice to Mastery (slide 1 of 3)

▲ Intentional practice is the magic!

▲ Recognize and enhance your natural talents.

▲ Greatness only happens with extensive practice

▲ Practice is the breakfast of champions

▲ Skipping practice means mediocre performance.

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1 Practice changes your body Both the brain and body change with practice.

2 Skills are specific Each skill must be practiced completely before it can be integrated into superior

performance

3 The brain drives the brawn Changes in the brain are evident in scans Areas of the brain relating to

finger exercises or arm movements show brain growth in those areas Expect the same in your brain as you truly master communication skills

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4 Practice style is crucial One can understand attending behavior intellectually, but actually practicing

the specific skills of attending makes the difference

5 Short-term intensity cannot replace long-term commitment You will want to take what you learn

about counseling skills and use it regularly

6 Practice provides a continuous feedback loop, which leads to even more improvement In addition,

feedback from colleagues on your counseling style and skills is especially beneficial

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Action: Key Points and Practice of Attending Behavior and Empathy

Skills

▲ Central Goals of Listening

▲ Four Aspects of Attending

▲ Attending Behavior

▲ Listening and Individual and Multicultural Differences

▲ Attending Behavior Research

▲ Empathy

▲ The Neuroscience of Active Listening and Empathy

▲

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