Ddi khi, nhimg hanh vi khdng dep, nhihig thdi quen xiu ; in hien khdng rd rang trong nhutig con ngudi dupe gpi la tdt.. Ngutt tdt ciing cd nhimg khiem khuyet Uong tfnh each, trong umg [r]
(1)TIM HIEU MOT SO THOI HI/ TAT XAU COA NGl/bl VIET QUA TUC NOOf
Nguyin Van Thdng ' Dgi hoc Qude gia Ha Ndi
Trong Ijcb sir dung nude va g\\i nude eiia ngudi Viet Nam, nhihig i phim chat cao dep nhat da timg dupe phat Id, trd truyen thd'ng a ihanh vdn lie'ng quy bau cua ca dan toe Dd la tinh than doc iSp lu i cudng, long yeu nude thie't tha, ti'nh thong minh, cin cii, nhan 4i, « ihuong ngudi nhu th^ thuong than Trai qua bao bien tbien cua lich sir, | nhirng phim chat v5n dupe phat buy, gin giir Tuy vay, cudc song hang ngay, khdng the khdng cd nhimg dieu ""chicdng tai gai mat'' dang dien xung quanh Dd ciing la nhimg mang tdi ehie'm mdt ti \t nhat dinh van hpc nghe thuat ndi chung, tuc ngir ndi rieng d bai vie't nay, chiing tdi mudn tim hie'u mdt sd thdi hu tat xa'u cua ngudi Viet qua tuc ngur
Khdng phai den bay gid, vdi tu ddi mdi theo dudng Id'i ciia " Dang, ngudi Viet Nam ta mdi dam "nhin thing*vao su that" d^ "noi r5 * sir that" Da tir lau, nhieu nha van boa, van nghe, nha nghien cihi phong tuc Viet Nam da timg di sau nghien cuu mot each khoa hoc ' ngoai de cao pham chat tot dep cua ngudi, ho vach rd nhOng ' nhupc diem tarn If tfnh each ton tai tir lau Nha van Thach Lam cho i rang, ngudi Viet ndng n6i, hdi hpt Phan Ke Bfnb, tac gia cua cu6a Viet Nam phong tuc lai len tieng che bai mdt bp phan dan chiing tii hen tri doan budn quin ban quanh, thich keo be keo canh Tan Di Vlam phat ngdn: "^Ddn hai Idm triiu ngudi Idn, nude bdn nghin ndm
vdn tie conT Nha phe binh van hpc Vuong Trf Nhan khdng ne Uinh cho rang, ihdi xau Ion nhat cua ngudi Viet la ra't sp ndi ve thdi xa'u cua mmh Cac y kien ndi tren cd ve cue doan va ""va dua cd ndm" nhung cung dang de chiing ta suy nghl
(2)Trong giao ti^p hang ngay, ngudi Viet Nam nhu dupe Idn len tren cai n^n van boa truyen thdng tdt dep ciia dan toe minh Tuc ngiJ Viet da phan anh cudc sdng ciia nhan dan vdi tfnh da dang, nhieu chi^u ciia nd Nbihig cau tuc ngO Viet phan anh mat tfeb cue, mat ban chS^t tdt dep cua nhan dan Viet Nam chiem mdt sd lupng kha Idn ^fhi^u net dep truyen thdng cua nhan dan da dupe bun due va giiJ gin qua nbi^u the' he va trd di san van boa tir ngan ddi Tuy vay, khdng phai ngudi liic nao ciing hoan bao, cudc sdng liic nao eung to^ bfch va nhSft b^t bien: ""Nhdn vd thdp todn" Xa hdi nao ma ching cd ngudi tdt, ke xSfu: ""Nude cd due, ngudi cd ke tuc ke thanh", Trong van hpc dan gian Viet Nam, dac biet la truyen cudi cua ngudi Viet cd khdng ft nbihig tac phim ndi ve thdi xa'u cua mdt bd phan nhan dan Truyen cudi da gieu ept thdi tham an (truyen Thdy dd lie'm mat), tat gan dd (truyen Tam dgi gdn), tfnh khoac lie (truyen Thi ndi khodc Con ran vudng), thdi gia ddi (truyen Dgu phu), tfnh dam dang (truyen Na mo boong), v.v
(3)Thanh ngir tieng Viet da song hanh ciing truyen cudi, ca dao, vt len bu'c tranh vdi nhieu gam mau tdi, rung len nhi?ng ndt nbac bu6a cua hien thuc cudc sdng Do day, nhihig hanh vi khdng dep nhu ""An xd md niiu\ ""An khoai cd vd\ ""An bde ddi dicng\ ""An canh cdcaiT i v.v van Cd ngudi bao, dd chi la nhihig thdi quen ca nhan, kh6ng phuong hai den Cd nhirng thdi quen tudng nhu v6 bai nhung lai giy khd chiu cho nhihig ngudi xung quanh Cd nbutig quy tic so ding cOa phep cu xir cd van boa ma bat cir cung cd the' biet rat rd, le ra, mpi ngudi phai tu giac lam ma khdng edn nhic, tu ta cung biet N6i each khac, each cu xir cd van boa ciing nhu cu xir thie'u van hoa th^ bien trudc bet nhung dieu nhd nhat
Ngudi Viet khdng chi neu hoac mieu ta cai xa'u ciia nguM j qua tuc ngu* ma quan hon, ho da danh mdt vi tri ddng ke' tuc ngix de' nhic nhd nhimg gi chua tdt mot bd phan cu dan Qi xa'u xa hoi iuon rinh rap, mudn keo ngudi khdi ngdi den cua cai tbien Cai xa'u xua't hien mpi khfa canh cua ddi sdng, trtn nhimg pham vi va muc dp khac Tuc ngii' cudi che nhihig ngudi coi mieng an lam trong: ""An vi thu, ngu vi tiin", ""DT thuc vi tiin", ""Co mii'ng lum cd tieng'; nhic nhd bpn pham an tuc udng: ""An khdn$ biet trd ddu diia", ""An thi cd md thi khdng", ""An cho cd Idng, an hotif^^ cd hot"; dau xdt trudc thdi dimg dung, thd o, fch ki: ""Ai cd mdt mm^ ngiciri dy\ ""Be chdng", ""Dia bam chdn ngudi ay gd\ "'Cha cluing khdng khdc", ""Chdy nhd hang xdm binh chdn nhu vgi', ""Din nhd nhd dy rgng", ""Than trdu trdu lo, than bd lieu", ""Hodi phan dem bo ritgng ngudi", ""Ai cd than ngudi dy lo, cd bd ngudi dy giiT; , buon phien trudc thai dp cue doan, yeu-ghet theo cam tfnh, cdn nhiiu dinh kien: ""Yiu yiu cd dudng di, ghet ghet cd tdng ty hg hdng"", ""Yiu nin tdt, ghet nen xdu"; xdt xa trude thdi ""Ghen dn tuc d' v.v
(4)Xd tieng han cd mieng", "Tdt danh han Idnh do" va thuc dung: ""An lay chdc mac lay ben"; nhibig ke Ipi dung: ""An bat dn xen, xe mam cdn hdng miit tay", ""Bdn thit cho ke ngdm ggo" va eo hdi ""Mugn gid bemdng"; nhutig ngudi a dua: "Theo ddm dn tdn" va vd on bac nghla: ""Vong dn bdi ngliia", ""An chdo dd bat", ""An cd bo ld\ ""An trdu quin vdi, ldm tdi quin chiia"; va bdi bac: ""Cha bo con, day td bo thdy" , cung dupe tuc ngii' dilm danh
Trong cac quan he gia dinh Viet Nam truyen thdng, dd day mdi quan he giu'a me chdng vdi dau, giiJa em ehdng vdi chi dau, giira dl ghe vdi eon rieng cua chong, giu'a bd dupng vdi rieng cua vp kh6ng phai liic nao cung nong a'm va dupe gin ket mot each chat che Trong tuc ngii' Viet, Idi tu cu vdi nhihig dinh kien cdn la rao can ngan each cac mdi quan he dd Nhimg cau: ""Mdy ddi bdnh diic cd xucmg, mdy ddi di ghe cd tliuang chong", ""Con chong tin khinh con minh thi yen", ""Di ghe riing chong", ""Di ghe mdy ngucn biet thicang chong, chong mdy ngudi bii't kinh di ghe"" ndi ve mau thuin giu'a di ghe vdi chong; ""Ddi thi dn ngd dn khoai, dicng a vdi dicgng diic tai Idng gieng" de cap de'n nhiJng bat hoa giua vp vdi bd' dupng; ""Me chong ndng ddu", ""That thd cung the Idi trdu, yiu nhau cung the ndng ddu me chong", ""Ran mudng thdng chin nhin cho me chong dn", ""Ddi thi dn kliedn sung, thdy me chong thi nudt chdng trdi", ""Ddu vd nhd me gid ngd" phan anh su xung khic giiJa me chong vdi dau; ""Gidc bin Ngd khdng bang bd cd ben chong", ""Chi ddu ldm ddu day, em chong dn bay ndi sau limg" ve su xung d6t chi dau vdi em chdng Doi sdng gid ndi len quan he giira gia dinh ehdng va ngudi dau: ""Bd chong Id Idng plncgng, me chSng Id tuang mdi td, ndng ddu mdi ve Id bo nghe chid", ""Con ddu thi dgi, gdi thi khdng" va ngupc lai: ""Bd chong Id long Ian hgch, me chong Id ddch Ian nang, ndng ddu mdi ve Id bd hodng hgu" Bat hoa CO lai sinh giira cac chj em dau vdi nhau: ""Chi em ddu cdi ddu lite lac", ""Chi em ddu Idm rdu bat xdo", ""Chi em ddu ndu ddu trdu limg ndi", ""Chi em ddu nhu bdu nUdc Id", ""Chi em ddu ndi trdu bd", v.v
(5)con ngudi Thdi thi dii ca, ching thi€?u mdt khia canh, mdt ddi tuodg nao ciia ddi sdng
Khi bi nhiem nhihrig thdi hu, tat x^u iy, ngudi se quin quanh vdi nbihig toan tinh ca nhan hep hdi Cd thdi xiu luc dSu chi la nhitag hien tupng ca biet, le te nhung cd liic nguy co, ph6 bife Thdi xlfu ngim va Idn din nhihig can benh trim kha, khd chJh, ' tham chf cdn pham vao trpng tdi: ""Bdi bio bg", ""Nem dd gidu taf, ' ""Chgc gay bdnh xe", ""Gap Ida bo tay ngicdi" Tuc ngu cung khdng ngai ngin dua nhihig ddi tupng dd trudc vanh mdng ngua
Nbihig thdi xa'u dd ching nhihig \hm nhat nhoa ve dep lich cua nbi^u ngudi ma cdn lam bang hoai nhihig gia tri dao dure Uuyfa ' thdng ciia xa hdi Nhihig bi^u hien ciia cdeb cu xur thie'u van hod da gay nen nhihig a'n tupng khd chiu: ".4/ ua dua khU bdu gid" vi bj nhihig ngudi tdt bung nhic nhd, phan bac, n^u khdng, thai dd dd rit nhanh chdng trd ngang ngupc, khdng coi gi
Ngudi ta ciing cd luc cd nhihig khuye't di^m hoac mic phai sai lim chet ngudi Thdi ki nao ma ching xu5ft bien nbihig phim cbSft t6t dep canh nhimg thdi hu tat xSfu Dd mdi la cudc sdng Cudc s6ng khdng xudi chi6u ma ludn cd cac mat ddi lap d^ phat tri^n va di Idn Cii tdt va cai xa'u vin dan xen, cai bay va cai dd vin song hanh tdn tai Cai dung cai sai xung ddt nhung lam bat len nhihig phim chit cua cai dung Ddi khi, nhimg hanh vi khdng dep, nhihig thdi quen xiu ; in hien khdng rd rang nhutig ngudi dupe gpi la tdt Ngutt tdt ciing cd nhimg khiem khuyet Uong tfnh each, umg xi Nguoc lai, ngudi thdng thudng dupe coi la xSfu cung cd nbihig im di^m ma chiing ta cd the' khai thae, hpc tap Bdi vay, ciing rix khd chia ngudi bai loai tdt va x^u mdt each rach rdi
(6)i "
i! flgB&l Ivtmg tbien: "/STAow Phat tdm xd", ""Mieng nam md bung bS
dao gdm"
i Tuc ngiJ Viet ndi v6 nhihig cai dd, cai nhupc diem ciia ngudi, S- cfia xa bdi nhim "canh tinh" ngudi, xay dung mdt ddi sdng van i hoi dep de mdi ngudi, xa hdi va hudng ngudi tdi ' nhutig di^u chan, tbien, mi Tuc ngir ndi ve cai chua tdt nghiem khic ; ma khdng "dao to biia Idn" Tuc ngiJ giiip eon ngudi nhan cai dung li vi cai sai le bay va dieu dd, cai tdt va cai xau de' tu hoan tbien minh
Cai tdt phai dupe nhan len, cai khdng dep phai bi loai bd
I Nhihig hanh dong cao quy phai xua't phat tir thdi thuc ndi tam, : khdng cin ki^m soat hoac nhic nhd ngudi ta van tu giac lam Ndi : each khac, nhutig chuin muc cua phep cu xit cd van hoa bit ngudn tir
nhu ciu ben ciia ngudi
Con ngudi thuc su cd van hoa la eon ngudi khdng cdn nhimg thdi hu, tat xa'u, cd dupe kha nang vd tan de' tu the hien, d^ bde Id mpi nang luc xay dung nhihig net dep van boa la can thiet cho timg ngudi va cho toan xa hoi Song vice tu bd mot thdi quen, lam thay ddi mot ne'p nghl vdn da hin sau cudc sdng ciia eon ngudi d^ xay dung mdt hanh vi van boa, mdt thdi quen tdt, mot ne'p nghl tich cue qua la khdng de
Khi giai thfch mdi quan he khdng may tdt dep giiJa me chong -nang dau va cac mdi quan he gia dinh khdng ciing huyet thdng khac qua nhihig cau tuc ngiJ Viet, cd ngudi cho ring quan niem ""khdc mau Idng" hoac dinh kien kbit khe cua ngudi ddi
(7)giii me de ciia minh (tiJc me chdng ciia cd) ma sinh oan trach chong khdng danh Upn tinh yeu thuong cho vp Chung tdi cho ring, nguydn nhan CO ban cung chi la vi ban tfnh ghen ti ma Chfnh dieu ghentj dd lam cho ngudi trai (ngudi chdng) trd nen khd xii Uong quanhd giira mot ben la me va mot ben la vp: ""Bin tinh bin hii'u bin ndo nan^ hanT\ Nhimg ngudi con, ngudi chong tdt ludn danh trpn ven niim kfnh yeu cho cha me va su yeu thuong cho vp Hp khdng bao gi& tu dat cau hdi "me hay vcr?" bdi vi ca me lin vp deu cd vi tri rifing trai tim hp
Ngay nay, "dan t r f da dupe nang cao, ngudi Viet Nam c6 each nhin nhan hon nen da gdp phin lam thay ddi dinh kie'n kbit khe cua ngudi ddi ve cac mdi quan he me chdng- nang dau, chi dau - em chdng Do vay, nhimg xung ddt gay git cac quan be dd kh6ng cdn mang tfnh phd bien niJa
Ngudi ta If giai nguyen nhan ciia nhihig thdi hu tat xa'u ciia ngufti Viet la ngheo ddi hoac ciing quin ma ra: ""Ddi dn viing, timg lam Hill", ""Ban ciing sinh dao tac" Cung cd the' vi ddi com, rach ao ma c6 ngudi phai lam nghe hanh kha't: ""An mdy Id ai, dn mdy Id ta„ddi cm rach hod dn mdy" Cung cd ngudi cho ring ""Nhdn cU vi bat thiin" • khdng cdng an vice lam cung de sinh hu ddn Ddi cung c6 the' tfnh hep hdi, tam If thua kem din dit ma Luc dd, Idng til trpng ciia ngudi minh nhu ngpn lira da tit, khdng cdn bimg len, nhu hdt gidng bi im khdng cdn nurt len dupe Nhfhig thdi >^u dd, liic diu cdn ft, ve sau cu' nd, dua chen them nhieu rdi quen, nep sdng Ndi each khac, nhimg thdi hu tat x^iu cung cd co bde Id, phat trie'n va tham chf trd nguy co cao cudc sdng
(8)^ N^n kinh t€ xa hdi va ddi sdng nhan dan Viet Nam da I c6 nhihig chuyin bi^n Da sd ngudi dan khdng cdn lo "an no mac , im" nfia ma dang vuon tdi muc tieu "an ngon mac dep" nhung nhihig I tat xiu ndi tren va nhilu can benh tr§m kha khac dau phai la da bet,
tham chi miic dd cdn tinh vi va nang ne hon Phai chang, anh hudng : vi tac ddng ciia Idi sdng ngoai lai, Idi sdng chi biet hudng thu thdi kinh ii thi tnrdng da tha boa mdt bd phan ngudi Viet? Cd th^ ndi, tren m6t sd Imh vuc, miic dd cao hon cua nhihig thdi hu tat x^u la nhung tieu cue va su xud'ng cSfp ciia dao diic xa hdi, cua phim chat eon ngudi Nhung cii If chii ye'u ciia nbihig tieu cue neu tren trudc bet van la : hau qua ciia n6n san xuSft nhd, manh miin; tap quan lac bau va ca
nhihig dinh ki€fn c6 hu
Trong ndi d^n nhihig bi^u hien tieu cue, tuc ngir Viet hiu nhu thien v^ ca ngpi cai td't va khing dinh Idi sdng tfeb cue, Idi sdng trpng tinh, mdt hiiu hien ban sic van hoa cua dan tdc
Cudc ddi la cai thii vd cung nghiem tuc nhung nd cung chiia diy nhihig cai tim phao, nhihig su Id lang Cai gi cung rd rang va dcm gian thi khdng cdn la cudc sdng niJa Cudc sdng xua khdng cd nhi^u tbiJ cam dd nhu bay gid ma thdi xiu vin cd da't sinh bdi ngudi mudn ddi vin chua thoat khdi nhihig lo toan com ao Nhung neu cii nhin vao nhihig cai Id lang thi budn lim Ddi ngudi ta phai quen no di, tim kiem, chit Ipc nhihig gi tdt dep nhat de' ma la'y dd lam guong bdi cudc ddi vin cdn r^t nhieu ngudi tdt va nhieu dieu dang ndi
(9)TAI L E U THAM K H A O
1 Chu Xuan Dien - Luong Van Dang - Phuong Tri (1993), Tuc ngQ Viet Nam (in lin tbii 2), NXB Khoa hpc xa hdi, H
2 Vu Dung - Vu Thuy Anh - Vu Quang Hao (1997) Tut dien ngd vd tuc ngQ Viet Nam (in lin thii 3), NXB Van hod, H., 784 U 3 Nguyen Xuan Kfnh ((Thu bien, 2002), Kho tdng tuc ngd ngudi
Viet (2 tap) NXB Van bda Thdng tin, 3246 U
4 Nguyen Luc - Luong Van Dang (1978), Thanh ngd tii'ng Vift, NXB Khoa hpc xa hdi, H, 360 U