Tài liệu The complete guide to the toefl ibt writing part 7 ppt

About the Independent Writing Task 649 THE RESPONSE Your response on the Independent Writing Task should be about 300 words long The Independent Writing Task asks you to express your opinion about the issue in the prompt Which side of the issue you choose to support is up to you; there is no “right” answer You need to clearly state your opinion (usually in the introduction to your response) In the body of the response, you need to explain and support your opinion In the conclusion, you need to restate or explain the significance of your opinion An outline of a typical Independent Writing Task might look like this: Introduction Paragraph Introduction to the general topic Statement of your opinion or preference (thesis statement) Body Paragraph Key point #1 of the passage Examples, reasons, and details that support your opinion or preference Paragraph Key point #2 supporting your opinion or preference Examples, reasons, and details that support your opinion or preference Conclusion Paragraph Summary or statement showing the significance of your opinion Other possible ways to organize Independent Responses are given in Lessons 25 and 26 ĐNILIIAN Paragraph Key point #3 supporting your opinion or preference Examples, reasons, and details that support your opinion or preference 650 Section Guide to Writing THE WRITING PROCESS You have thirty minutes in which to write the response for the Independent Writing Task You should divide your time more or less like this: Pre-Writing (two to five minutes) Read the prompt Think about the prompt Brainstorm and take notes Make an informal outline Writing the Independent Task (twenty to twenty-five minutes) Checking Your Writing (two to five minutes) Look for and correct problems with content, grammar, and mechanics SCORING THE INDEPENDENT WRITING TASKS Like the Integrated Writing Task, the Independent Writing Task is scored by two raters who scote it holistically Scores on the Independent Writing Task range from to Each rater assigns a “whole number” score to the response (0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5) Your score will be the mean of the two ratings If one rater gives you a 3, for example, and another rater gives you a 4, you will receive a score of 3.5 If the two raters give you scores that are quite different, a third rater will read the response The following rubric (set of guidelines or standards) is similar to the one used by ETS to score the Independent Writing Task Score Explanation of Score Strongly indicates the ability to write a well-organized, well-developed, and logical response Specific examples and details support the main ideas All of the elements of the response are unified and cohesive A variety of sentence structures are used successfully, and sophisticated vocabulary is employed Grammatical and mechanical errors are infrequent but a few minor mistakes may occur About the Independent Writing Task 65T Indicates the ability to write an organized, developed, and logical response The main ideas are adequately supported by examples and details Sentence structure may be less varied than that of a level response, and vocabulary less sophisticated Grammatical and mechanical errors appear Indicates some ability to write an acceptable response, but involves weaknesses in organization and development Sentence structure and vocabulary may lack sophistication, and there may be frequent grammatical and mechanical errors Indicates the inability to write an acceptable response Organization and development are weak May lack unity and cohesion Few specific details are given in support of the writer's ideas If details are given, they may seem inappropriate Significant and frequent errors in grammar occur throughout the response, making it difficult to understand the writer’s ideas Writer may not have fully understood the response prompt Strongly indicates the inability to write an acceptable development or organization Sentences may be brief unrelated to each other Very significant grammatical throughout the response and make it very difficult to ideas Writer may have completely misunderstood the response No apparent and fragmentary and and mechanical errors occur understand any of the author's response prompt Did not write an response, did not write on the topic, or wrote in a language other than English Following are five responses, each illustrating one of the five scores They are written in response to the following prompt: Some people believe that money spent on space research benefits all of humanity Other people take the opposite view and say that money spent on this type of research is wasted Tell which point of view you agree with and explain why, using specific details and reasons Response I It has become quite a common proverb that “there is no free lunch.” Another way to say this is that spending money always has it’s “opportunity cost.” In other words, money spent on some venture could have been used for financing some other alternative venture Some people believe that money spent on space research has a benefit for all people Other people believe that there are better opportunities for spending this fund The first group of people say that space research has helped all peoples’ lives very much They point out that research on space has informed us about many environmental damages which we have caused to our planet OININBECOAYN SAMPLE RESPONSES 652 Section Guide to Writing Similarly, they say that today’s modern satelite system is due to the research done in the past on space There are also many new materials and inventions that can be traced directly to space research These people want to spend more money on research, visit all the planets, and build space colonies In the other hand, there are people who think that money spent on space is a complete wastage because it does not have enough direct benefit to all of the humanity For example, billions of US$ were spent on the Project Apollo and they only brought back a bag of rocks In the meanwhile, there is a sizeable portion of the humanity that does not have any access to food, education, sanitation, health care, and especially peace Personally, | find that | cannot allign myself completely with either group | have some reservation about both positions No one can deny that weather satelites and communication satelites are a good investment But | think that “unrealistic” research like exploring Mars or Venus does not have any good bearing on most of humans’ development at the present time Some scientists may be interested in the composition of those planets, but the opportunity cost is too much In my opinion, it is like the poor man who wants to buy diamond jewlry when his family does not have enough food to eat or clothes to wear Score: Comments: This writer clearly understands the assignment and gives supporting information for both arguments The essay is well organized, and the writer shows that he or she can say things in more than one way, uses idioms and verb tenses appropriately, and chooses clear and concrete examples to support his or her position Response Some people really believe that space reseaches benefit all of humanity And it’s quite understandable because all the history of humanity development is connected with the space discovers From the beginning people have been looking the sky and observing the star’s movements and their influence For example, everyone knows about astrology and how ancient people try to predict the future using knowledge of the stars The present space discovery started in 1957, when the sputnik was launched The first person flew in the space in 1961, and after several years first Americans landed on moon Nowdays space researches can solve a lot of problems, For example, reseaches with new materials and technologies Such materials can be used in medicine, chemistry, and etc With the help of space satellites we can observe the atmosphere around the Earth and that’s why we can try to predict storms and so on, Through such observation we can save people’s lifes and decrease destructions, also we can solve problems with the different kinds of pollutions of ocean and atmosphere However, it is quite understandable the position of those who say that space researches are wasted There are to many places where the main problem of life is to survive My native country once was part of Soviet Union, where the big first steps in space were taken | see people there who works hard and doesn’t receive enough or any salary | wonder if they approve the space researches? About the Independent Writing Task 653 But I’m sure that if we concentrate only on the question of how to survive, the humanity will lose the reason for development If we refuse from space researches, or any kind of the scientific researches, we will stop moving forward And the absence of moving forward means the death of the humanity’s spirit That’s why | agree with the statement Score: Comments: This essay shows that the writer has vocabulary and grammar usage While the essay provides details, the writer sometimes digresses information This essay would be more on track the opening paragraph and supported his or her remaining paragraphs a good command of English is generally coherent and and provides unnecessary if the writer took a position in position more clearly in the Response Well, about the topic, | think that there are others subjects much more important to be researching One of them, and to me the most important one, is the health The cancer cure is not totally developed yet The number of AIDs’ victims multiplying at an incredibly way So, although | find in “space” a very fascinating and misterious subject, | agree with the opposite view that the money spend on it is wasted when are so many people dying around the world as a result of unknown diseases or not having answers or cures for the ones we already known, or because is not enough money for purification of the water, vaccines for the diseases, or training the doctors More money for the education is also very important More schools and good teachers are needed | believe cientifics should focus “health” in the first place and then to extend the researches in other fields Score:_ Comments: This writer understands the assignment yet answers it by telling the reader what other things are more important before stating his or her position on the topic The writer shows that he or she has some knowledge of English vocabulary, but there are errors in sentence structure, grammatical usage, and overall clarity Response At the first the research in any thing is very useful for people because without research we will not development our life, so that | believe the money spent in space research benefit the humantity Maybe the other side people think that the money which paid for these research is so much and if we paid it for poor people it well be help him in they life and help him for many thing like food or healthy or any way of they life =Es) = Z ap) 654 Section Guide to Writing But the people which agrees with have a lot of point for example: one of this is the life must be development Other point, the rule materials become less and we must find a new one and must find new resource of power, so that they agree with a research in space Score:_ _ Comments: This writer’s essay is very short and does not adequately take a position and give supporting information The ideas are not fully developed The writer’s knowledge of sentence structures is limited, and word forms are not always used properly, making this essay difficult to follow Response the peoples take the opposive view because we don’t buy something one time and we don’t see another things that is a save way the money is important things for this reason to spent money the peoples need to be very cerfully ihave two opinion for spent money the money important to spent all humanty, because this point very important i’m not agree money wested in the futurre very important Score: Comments: This essay is very disorganized The writer uses very limited vocabulary and provides no details, making this essay difficult to understand There are significant errors in every sentence The punctuation is incorrect, and verbs are not used correctly EXERCISE: SCORING THE RESPONSE Directions: Here are three responses based on the passage below Read each response and, using the scoring rubric on pages 650-651, decide what score (1 to 5) that you would give each response This exercise will help you develop the ability to score your own responses Some people believe that money spent on space research benefits all of humanity Other people take the opposite view and say that money spent on this type of research is wasted Tell which point of view you agree with and explain why, using specific details and reasons Response When we think that mony spent space reserches, are two opinins Some peoples beliefe that we can reserche benfits all of humanity, But on the othrt hand, people take opposite view say that this type research is wasted the mony and we have limitation this kinds reserches In my opinin | agree last one We, humen, reserche our space all time until now and we spending a lots mony this kinds reserches Some peoples think if we use expansive machines and spent a lots money we can make all kinds reserches about humanity In fact, we found many benfit from these reserches and recive benfits, For example, we About the Independent Writing Task 655 could gone to moon But, sometime, even although spent a lots money, we cant find results and spent a lots time, furthermore, some acident which we cant expect happen, such as Challenger acident The reson why, space is not man-made but nature lt means we cant expect and investigate exactlty Because, they are nature, therefore they change all the time We, humen, have follow this changes In my opinin, we cant reserche whole things Because, they are nature and change all the time Score: Response Space research is an integral part of the modern civilization Certainly this kind of scientific research needs a huge amount of investment And of course, there is a lot of competition for very rare intelectual and fiscal resources In other words, there are a lot of alternative investment opportunities for these resources that could benefit humanity Space research is a long-run investment process The benefits out of this kind of research, once implemented, have a tremendous positive influence on all of the world | want to take a position in favour of this type of research Space research, particularly as related to developments of satelite technology, may bring many positive development in the area of eradicating the root causes of many problems prevailing in this world The most important to consider is poverty Following are the scope of satelite technology-related research: a) remote sensing b) weather forecasting c) early warning of any calamaties d) long-range forecasting of weather for the agriculture e) impact assessment of el nino and la nina conditions Development of Global Positioning System (GPS) using satellite-driven information may contribute in modern infra-structure planning Another aspect of satelite technolgy is the Geographical Information System (GIS), now playing pioneering role in information technology having resource-saving opportunities for development, and the saved resources can always be used for betterment of humanity All and all, | can’t help to believe that in the long-run, space research is one of the optimal investments that humanity can Score: Response The use son has is called “Homo human of money is very important In the pre-historic period, the human pernot money The products were only changed one against another This the barter process but one epoque of pre-history was called the faber” period That means the human persons learned to deviop the conditions of living They learned to make objets After this, the value of 656 Section Guide to Writing products could be determine with money A widespread proverbe of the french people tells us that the money serves very well the people but the money also is the worst master for the people who become enclosed by money Aristote is the father of science He begun the psychic and philosophic and scientific research Then there is the invention of mendicaments, the invention of planes, the invention of computer, all these invention are the resultat of research in science Surely, the research is important but the resultat of research can be negative while it can also be positive What about the research of the space? all of us saw the spectacular pictures of the earth from space and of international space station and shuttle So are these pictures worth billion of dollars used annually around the world? Some people say that expenditures on space research have no effect and is comletely useless It does not enter the progress of the human people it has no relation to our life and actually does not us any good All of us benefit from the research of the space It advances the theoretical body of many sciences, like physics, astronomie, chemistrie etc It also has more tangible accomplisments in the way it improve the technology we can use in our every day life For example, we can all enjoy a diversity of TV chanels and the satellite predictions of the weather There is also a positive influence on peoples health and natural disasters But the resultats of the space research not divided fairly among the human persons Scientists recive the best effects of it Also the rich nations benefit more than the poor ones such as our african nations In concluding, the money spent for space is very important and has a lot of benefits for all us | think we should embrace it But the resultats of that research should be divided fairly among all the persons of the world Score: ¢ When the directions for the Independent Task appear, click on the Dismiss Directions button and begin working right away ¢ Read the prompt carefully You must write on the topic exactly as it is given Give yourself time to think about the prompt and to plan your response by taking notes and writing a simple outline * The prompt will ask to give your opinion, to support one side of an issue, or to give your personal preference Make it clear what your opinion is or what you prefer and why Remember, there is no “right answer.” You should choose the side that is easier to support e Use concrete examples and specific reasons Whenever you make a general statement, support it with specific examples If you state an opinion, give reasons Independent Writing Preview Test 657 INDEPENDENT WRITING PREVIEW TEST The second writing task in the Writing Section is an “independent” task It involves writing a response to a question using your own experience and background knowledge Now read the directions for the second writing task Directions: Read the question below You will have thirty minutes to write your essay This includes the time to plan, write, and revise your essay A typical response should be a minimum of 300 words Your essay will be rated on the correctness and quality of your writing, including the way you organize your essay and develop and support your ideas If possible, write your responses on a computer Some people believe that zoos serve useful functions Other people believe that it is cruel and wrong to confine animals in zoos Tell which point of view you agree with and explain why, using specific details and reasons =ES = Q y LESSON 25 PRE-WRITING THE INDEPENDENT RESPONSE You should spend about five minutes “pre-writing” your essay for the Independent Response What should you during this time? You have three main tasks: Read the essay prompt (topic) carefully Brainstorm (think about) the prompt Plan your response During the second and third tasks, you should take notes to use as an outline when you write the response Try to spend no more than five minutes on pre-writing, but don't skip this stage altogether—it’s a very important use of your time! (A) Reading the Prompts In some ways, carefully reading each prompt is the most important step of the entire process If you don’t understand the prompt, you can’t properly respond to it If you write an essay that does not fully respond to the prompt, you will receive a lower score, no matter how well you have written the response The prompts for the Independent Response tend to be written in very simple English If any of the vocabulary is difficult, it is usually explained Not only you need to read the prompt carefully, you also need to understand what it is asking you to You need to analyze the prompt—to be able to paraphrase it (put it into your own words) and to explain to yourself what it asks you to (You don’t need to this analysis in writing, only mentally.) Read the following analyses of the sample prompts given in the Preview Test and About the Independent Writing Task Some people believe that zoos serve useful functions Other people believe that it is cruel and wrong to confine animals in zoos Tell which point of view you agree with and explain why, using specific details and reasons Analysis This prompt says that there are two opinions about zoos Some people believe that zoos have a positive purpose Others think that zoos are harmful to animals To respond to this prompt, I have to decide which of these positions I want to support IfI choose to defend zoos, I must think of some good purposes that zoos serve On the other hand, ifI choose to emphasize the negative aspects of zoos, I must think of ways in which zoos are damaging or unsafe for animals or are not useful for the humans who pay for these zoos through their taxes 658 Lesson 25: Pre-Writing the Independent Response 659 Do you agree or disagree with this statement? It is much easier to learn in a small class than in a large one Use specific examples and reasons to support your answer Analysis This prompt asks about my opinion of class size and whether I think it has an effect on learning I can choose one of two positions One position is that small class size does make it easier to learn, and I’ll need to give examples of ways in which it does If I choose the other side, I have to say that size is not an important factor I could say that a good teacher can make sure students learn in even a large class, and give examples of ways in which he or she could that Developments in transportation such as the invention of the automobile have had an enormous impact on modern society Choose another development in transportation that you think is of great importance Use specific examples and reasons for your choice Analysis For this prompt, I have to choose some development in transportation that I think is equally important or almost as important as the development of the automobile I can't choose the automobile because the prompt says to choose another development I could, for example, choose the development of the railroad and talk about how this had an impact on the world in general or on one country in particular (B) Brainstorming The process of brainstorming involves generating ideas on a topic Just sit back for a moment and think about the topic and write down any ideas that come to you These may be things you have read in newspapers and magazines, things you’ve heard in classes or on television, or personal experiences These ideas may turn out to be useful or not—just write them all down Let’s say that you are assigned the first prompt You would try to think about anything—positive or negative—that you have read about or heard about in connection with zoos, and quickly write these ideas down For the second topic, you would probably use your own experiences Can you remember any positive experiences with either a large class or a small one? Any negative ones? Write them down 660 Section Guide to Writing Your brainstorming notes for the first prompt might look like this: Some endangered animals are found only in zoos: would be extinct without ZOOS Costs.a lot of money to maintain zoos properly Some people think that zoos are unnatural Take away animals dignitu.and put them on show Like prisons for animals But modern zoos give animals more space duplicate natural environments C) (Zoos protect animals from predators from development from hunters Zoos educate children, in fact, everyone Most people would never see animals from far away places if they didn’t see them.in zoos Zoos are a nice place to spend the day with family _ good entertainment (C) Planning the Essay This stage of pre-writing actually overlaps with Step B; while you are brainstorming, you are beginning to plan your essay The first step in planning is to choose your basic thesis A thesis is the central or controlling idea of an essay For the first two types of prompts—defending an opinion and agreeing/disagreeing with a statement—choosing a thesis simply means choosing which side of the argument you are going to support For example, for the first prompt your thesis might be “In my opinion, zoos serve several useful purposes.” For the second, your thesis might be “With the right teacher, large class size has little effect on learning.” For the third prompt, you have to choose what development you are going to discuss; for example, your thesis might be “I believe that the development of jet airliners was extremely important.” Remember that when you choose a thesis, there is no right or wrong answer The readers at ETS don’t care whether you are in favor of zoos or against them, whether you like small classes or big ones, or whether you think the development of rockets, railroads, or roller skates was most important In fact, you should choose whatever side of the argument is easiest to support It’s possible, for example, that you have had generally good experiences in large classes, but that you can think of more reasons why small classes are better It is not necessary to fully support either point of view Sample Response (p 651) is an example of an essay that partially supports both points of view Once you have chosen a thesis, you need to think of ways to support it Look at the notes you took while brainstorming Are Lesson 25: Pre-Writing the Independent Response 66T there any concrete details or compelling reasons that support the thesis you have chosen? If not, think of some now Next, you need to write a simple outline You don’t have to write a formal outline with Roman numerals and letters, just a basic plan for your four or five paragraphs You may be tempted to skip this step to save time, but writing an outline is very important Following a simple outline is the best way to keep an essay organized, and good organization is one of the most important things readers look for in scoring your essay For the “opinion” prompts (types and 2), there are two basic ways to organize the body of your essay One is to write two or three paragraphs, each providing a reason why your opinion is the “correct” one Introduction Paragraph Here is my opinion Body Paragraph My opinion is right for this reason Paragraph A second reason why my opinion is right is that Paragraph A third reason why my opinion is right is that Another approach is to restate both sides of the argument—A and B—in your introduction The introduction does not say which side of the argument is “correct.” Then, in one paragraph of the body, you provide several reasons to support the side that you not agree with—opinion A This tactic is sometimes called admitting the opposition Then, in the next paragraph or two of the body, you give even stronger reasons why the other point of view, opinion B, is the better or more logical one The conclusion restates the idea that opinion B is the right one Introduction Paragraph There are two possible opinions on this topic, opinions A and B Which is better? Body Paragraph Here are some reasons to believe opinion A is right Paragraph But here are some even better reasons to believe opinion B Paragraph Here are more reasons why opinion B is right Conclusion Paragraph As you can see, opinion B is right is right ĐNILIHAA Conclusion Paragraph or As you can see, my opinion is right 662 Section Guide to Writing Samples Outlines for the three prompts given in this lesson might look like this: Prompt A Outline Conclusion h5 sition to zoos based mainly on outmoded ideas of zoos Zoos protect & educate & on the whole positive Lesson 25: Pre-Writing the Independent Response 663 Prompt B Outline O = ”” =Zz = G3 ... pre-history was called the faber” period That means the human persons learned to deviop the conditions of living They learned to make objets After this, the value of 656 Section Guide to Writing. .. to understand what it is asking you to You need to analyze the prompt? ?to be able to paraphrase it (put it into your own words) and to explain to yourself what it asks you to (You don’t need to. .. Section Guide to Writing THE WRITING PROCESS You have thirty minutes in which to write the response for the Independent Writing Task You should divide your time more or less like this: Pre-Writing