CHARLOTTE WITTENKAMP BRIDGE BUILDER BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES WHY DON’T I FOLLOW YOUR NORMS? Download free eBooks at bookboon.com Building Bridges across Cultural Differences: Why don’t I follow your norms? 2nd edition © 2018 Charlotte Wittenkamp Bridge Builder & bookboon.com ISBN 978-87-403-1959-0 Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES CONTENTS CONTENTS About the Author About the reader The Golden Circle What is culture? 11 Values and Norms 13 The Learning Curve 17 4.1 The U-curve 18 4.2 Value clash 20 4.3 Going back 21 www.sylvania.com We not reinvent the wheel we reinvent light Fascinating lighting offers an ininite spectrum of possibilities: Innovative technologies and new markets provide both opportunities and challenges An environment in which your expertise is in high demand Enjoy the supportive working atmosphere within our global group and beneit from international career paths Implement sustainable ideas in close cooperation with other specialists and contribute to inluencing our future Come and join us in reinventing light every day Light is OSRAM Download free eBooks at bookboon.com Click on the ad to read more BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES CONTENTS Adapting – or not 22 5.1 Assimilation 22 5.2 Bi/Multi cultural 23 5.3 Rejection 24 5.4 Culture loss 25 Don’t jump this chapter as much as you may want to 26 6.1 Questionnaire confusion 26 6.2 What does Statistical Mean mean? 27 6.3 Variance 28 6.4 What can you infer from knowing the mean? 28 6.5 Correlations and Causality 29 More about Values 30 7.1 Schwartz’s Value theory 31 7.2 Values according to Hofstede 41 Other Models 44 8.1 World Values Survey 44 8.2 The Lewis Model 46 8.3 GlobeSmart 47 8.4 Missing values 49 Egalitarianism / Hierarchy / Patriarchy 50 9.1 Status and Respect 51 10 History 54 10.1 The Protein Theory 55 10.2 The Xenophobe Theory 56 10.3 Rice / Wheat theory 57 10.4 Imperialism/Colonialism 58 10.5 Is this still relevant? 59 Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES CONTENTS 11 Systems 61 11.1 General legalities 62 11.2 School Systems 64 11.3 Taxes 67 11.4 Public accounts 68 11.5 Other Systems 69 12 Blueprint of the World 72 13 Communication 73 13.1 Language 75 13.2 Other Communication Pitfalls 76 13.3 Communication Filters 86 14 Concluding Comments 89 Appendix I: European Social Survey Value Questions 91 Appendix II: Additional Resources 94 Acknowledgements 96 Endnotes 97 Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES ABOUT THE AUTHOR ABOUT THE AUTHOR After having worked in Denmark with organizational development in the inancial industry and with companies such as IBM and Motorola, my family moved to the San Francisco Bay Area in 1998 with a small startup Several startups later, we still live here Without a work permit the irst years of our life in the US, I went back to school to study psychology with a focus on cultural diferences I have since assisted numerous transfers, students, and au pairs with their transition in and out of the area and with their practical and emotional adjustment to the changed surroundings and expectations Did I experience culture shock? Yes indeed he egalitarian Scandinavian mindset is very diferent from highly competitive USA Did I get back to my old self after recovery? No, I got back to my new self Where my old self was focused on processes and data analysis, my new self is more focused on the person in front of me (I still like to know what the data says In some contexts, to me numbers speak louder than words.) To all who have helped me in that transition, my heartfelt thanks hat is, by the way, part of the Silicon Valley culture: Pay it forward So let me pass my experience on to you Charlotte Wittenkamp BA Econ, MS Psych charlotte@usdkexpats.org Los Altos, CA, September 2017 Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES ABOUT THE READER ABOUT THE READER Who are you? Most of the people interested in cross-cultural questions found this ield because they suddenly were part of an international transfer where they were the minority, the person who moved here is nothing like being on the outside of a group to feel a need to understand those who are in the majority Adapting to their behavior is a choice, but we can’t make the choice until we have some understanding of the group we are watching Whether they will let us in is their choice – but the chance is greater if we know how to play by their rules If this describes you, please read on Some people are already “part of the group” but are interested in bringing some of us strangers in hey can be employers, or in-laws, or friends, or providers of services and goods, or just be plain kind hearted and curious If you already are – or are likely to get – in contact with one of us temporary or permanent immigrants, this book will also have something for you And inally, there are people who think of starting exporting or who have already had professional contacts where it became clear that there are many locally determined ways of doing business just as there are many ways of being social While you will also beneit from learning much more about local customs, do’s, and don’ts in the markets you want to address, reading this book could make it is much easier to remember those rules1) So you, too, may want to join me through the following pages I have tried to address issues that will arise from “westerners going east” as well as “easterners going west”, “northerners going south”, and “southerners going north” but naturally my own background has colored both style and content he book has endnotes that sometimes have extra examples or additional comments, sometimes references to linkable online articles, or just regular references You should be able to jump freely to the endnotes and back by clicking on the number In this 2nd edition of the book, I have updated these endnotes so you shouldn’t experience “dead links” But websites change, so if you don’t reach the address in the link, please contact me and I may – perhaps – be able to ind the information Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES THE GOLDEN CIRCLE THE GOLDEN CIRCLE Some years back Simon Sinek promoted the concept of he Golden Circle in customer communication2) he message was that if we want to connect with our client base it is less important What we or How we it – what really counts is Why we it Based on this Why we can make others part of our movement Does this thinking apply to understanding culturally diferent people, too? Will we be more motivated to connect with other people, if we understand Why they what they do? Science seems to think so, at least when we talk about individuals3) When we understand “where somebody comes from”, what their experiences have been, what their story is, we are more likely to feel empathy and to engage Even in the courtroom, erratic behaviors are sometimes attributed to peoples’ stories: “If that is how she grew up, little wonder she didn’t know any better.”4) Most people understand intellectually that people who grew up in diferent countries have experienced totally diferent circumstances, norms, and behaviors But they have often little idea what these circumstances, norms, and behaviors actually are and consequently they don’t know what to expect hey don’t know if the “erratic behavior” is just another cultural norm; they just experience the consequence: that they feel hesitant about trusting the other person because that person evidently is unpredictable Much of this happens without we are even aware of it If the body language is slightly of, the person stands a little closer to us in the elevator than we are used to, someone is a little more loud or quiet; all spells “Beware!” to our super sensitive “stranger sensors” he only way to efectively quell the “stranger sensors” is through repeated exposure with positive outcomes Short of that, we can try to be more mindful about these feelings If the “Beware”-reaction can lead us to become curious instead of vigilant (or at least along with vigilant), interactions tend to be smoother Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES THE GOLDEN CIRCLE Just like in Sinek’s circle, when we learn about other cultures we irst notice What they It is a rather supericial irst glance, some times referred to as “the tip of the iceberg” As mentioned, it can be diference in personal space, or that Japanese people bow to each other, not just as a greeting but sometimes while they talk as well We may notice that Americans smile more or that Koreans smile less We see what the other people wear, what they eat If we need to interact with foreign nationals, we may try to be accommodating by learning How they things – not the least how to speak their language – but also how they treat each other But Why they what they do? his book is more about the Whys than about the Whats or the Hows One reason is that the Whats and the Hows depend on which country you will be focusing on – it may even depend on which region in the country since many countries have distinct subcultures To cover this it would have to be a really big book – of which you would need to read only the 2% related to the culture you want to know more about here are other resources available either online or through many cross-cultural coaching agencies spanning the world if you want to learn the Whats and Hows of national customs here are whole books on some of the practical diferences – f.ex on how to apply for jobs in diferent countries All the same, to illustrate points or concepts there are some Whats and Hows in examples throughout the book (And I have added a list of websites and other reading material I have found useful in the Appendix and in the references In the interest of full disclosure, I have no professional relationships with the companies referred to in the text.) his book is a recipe for where to look for answers to the Whys so you can better coexist harmoniously and productively with people from other cultures – may you live in their country or they in yours he answers are found in neuroscience, psychology, history, religion, geography, politics… But the most important part is to ask Why Just asking the question is half the efort It is a willingness to engage deeper with people not like you Download free eBooks at bookboon.com 10 ... WITTENKAMP BRIDGE BUILDER BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES WHY DON’T I FOLLOW YOUR NORMS? Download free eBooks at bookboon.com Building Bridges across Cultural Differences: Why don’t... bookboon.com Click on the ad to read more BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES CONTENTS Adapting – or not 22 5.1 Assimilation 22 5.2 Bi/Multi cultural 23 5.3 Rejection 24 5.4 Culture loss... Download free eBooks at bookboon.com BUILDING BRIDGES ACROSS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES ABOUT THE READER ABOUT THE READER Who are you? Most of the people interested in cross -cultural questions found this