Chapter Z^: Don't 60 There: Words and Expressions to Avoid 313 On Thin Ice Let's look at each of these problems in detail. Sexist Language Lies More than half of all Americans are of the female persuasion. If you write he and him, you're ignoring half the people in the country. If you talk about a doctor as he, you're giving the cold shoulder to female medical doctors—more than one-third of all physi- cians graduating today. In a similar way, don't refer to an unknown nurse as she, because there are some excellent nurses of the male persuasion. So what do we say to sexist language? Liar, liar, pants on fire. Sexist Language Annoys and Alienates Readers According to the latest edition of the World Almanac, we've come a long way, baby. Here's proof: • Of the 103 million women age 16 and over in America, 61 million are working. • Women accounted for 59 percent of labor-force growth between 1985 and 1995. • Women have made substantial progress in obtaining jobs in virtually all manage- rial and professional specialty occupations. • Of the approximately 69 million families in the United States, 12 million (18 percent) are maintained by women. In black families, it's 46 percent; in Hispanic families, 24 percent. Because more than half the women in the United States are in the workforce, women are an economic and political power that can't be ignored. Modern women get angry at writers and speakers who stereotype and patronize them with sexist language. Ditto for stay-at-home fathers and men in nontraditional jobs. Sexist Language Causes Legal Problems The law is increasingly intolerant of biased documents and hostile work environments. Because federal law forbids discrimination on the basis of gender, people writing pol- icy statements, grant proposals, or any other official documents must be very careful not to use any language that could be considered discriminatory. Otherwise, they're just looking for a lawsuit. 3H Part 5: Style: AM the Write Stuff Sexist Language Perpetuates Sexist Attitudes A steady diet of sexist language encourages women to have low aspirations, to seek jobs rather than careers, and to think the so-called "glass ceiling" can't be shattered. Sexist language makes it more difficult for people who have been pushed to the mar- gins to enter the mainstream. Sexist language is so pervasive that it sometimes seems natural. Nonetheless, sexist language sends a message that the only people with power are white middle-class males. When a single woman gets a letter address to Mrs. instead of Ms., she realizes that the writer neither knows her nor cares about her. Job descriptions with male pronouns automatically disregard more than half the population. Nonsexist Language: Level the Playing Field Nonsexist language treats both sexes neutrally. It does not make assumptions about the proper gender for a job, nor does it assume that men take precedence over women. Here are some guidelines to help you use nonsexist language when you write and speak: 1. Avoid using he to refer to both men and women. Sexist: He is a good writer so he knows how to select suitable words. Nonsexist: Good writers know how to select suitable words. 2. Avoid using man to refer to men and women. Sexist: Man is a social creature. Nonsexist: People are social creatures. 3. Avoid expressions that exclude one sex. Here are some of the most offensive examples and acceptable alternatives. Out In mankind humanity the common man the average person 4. Avoid language that denigrates people. Sexist: stewardess, male nurse, old wives' tale Nonsexist: flight attendant, nurse, superstition The following chart shows the preferred terms for many common occupations. Chapter Ik: Don't 60 There: Words and Expressions to Avoid 315 Out In waitress woman lawyer workman salesman foreman chairman businessman server lawyer worker, employee (or a specific work title) salesperson supervisor chair, moderator the person's specific title 5. Use the correct courtesy title. Use Mr. for men and Ms. for women, with these two exceptions: • In a business setting, professional titles take precedence over Mr. and Ms. For example, when I'm teaching in the university, I'm referred to as Dr. Rozakis rather than Ms. Rozakis. • Always use the title the person prefers. Some women prefer Miss to Ms. If you are not sure what courtesy title to use, check in a company directory and on previous correspondence to see how the person prefers to be addressed. Also pay attention to the way people intro- duce themselves. 6. Use plural pronouns and nouns when- ever possible. Sexist: He must check all his employees' timecards. Nonsexist: Supervisors must check all employees' timecards. Danger, Will Robinson Watch for phrases that suggest women and men behave in stereotypical ways, such as talkative women, rugged men, giggling girls, rowdy boys. Expunge such phrases from your writing and speech. Quoth the Maven , If you do not know the per- son's gender ; you can call the company and ask the reception- ist, use the reader's full name in the salutation [Dear J. Rickets), or use the person's position or job title [Dear Bursar). k^ y Quoth the Maven Remember to use nonsexist language on visuals (such as slide captions, posters, and videos) as well as in speech and writing. 316 Part 5: Style: All the Write Stuff Top of Your Game You're not out of the woods yet, bunky. Language can trap you by being racist and ageist as well as sexist. You wouldn't discriminate against people based on their race, age, or disability—and neither should your words. So what you want to use is bias-free language. This type of language uses words and phrases that don't discriminate on the basis of gender, physical condition, age, race, or anything else. Here are three ways to play fair when you write and speak: 1. Refer to a group by the term it prefers. Language changes, so stay on the cutting edge. For example, a hundred years ago, black people were called colored. Fifty years later, the term Negro was used. Today, the preferred terms are African American and black. Here are some other changes to put in your Rolodex: • Asian is preferred over Oriental. • Inuit is preferred over Eskimo. • Latino is the preferred designation for Mexican Americans, Puerto Ricans, Dominicans, and other people with Central and Latin American backgrounds. #• Senior citizen is preferred over old person. You Could Look It Up Bias-free language uses words and phrases that don't dis- criminate on the basis of gender, physical condition, age, race, or anything else. W 2. Focus on people, not their conditions. Biased: mentally retarded people Nonbiased: people with mental retardation Biased: the blind Nonbiased: people with vision impairments Biased: cancer patients Take My Word for It One in every six Americans has a disability, defined as a physi- cal, emotional, or mental impairment. Expect the ratio to increase as the population ages. Nonbiased: people being treated for cancer Biased: abnormal, afflicted, struck down Nonbiased: atypical 3. Identify someone's race only if it is relevant to your story. And if you do mention one person's race, be sure to mention everyone else's. Chapter 2*1: Don't Go There: Words and Expressions to Avoid 317 Spin Doctors When's the last time someone tried to sell you an "underground condominium"? It's the newest term for a grave. (Would I lie to you?) See any "personal manual databases" being hawked on the home shopping network? They're what we used to call calendars. If you're like me, you're probably having some trouble understanding some of the lat- est phrases you read in the newspaper, hear on the radio, or see on television. Let's see how bad things really are. Try to decode the following phrases: 1. Vertically challenged 2. Nonpositively terminated 3. Revenue enhancement 4. Unauthorized withdrawal 5. Outplaced 6. Mechanically separated meat 7. Cheese analogs 8. Involuntarily leisured Answers Did you get these answers? 1. a short person 2. fired 3. tax increase 4. robbery 5. fired 6. salvaged meat 7. fake cheese 8. fired 318 PartS: Style: All the Write Stuff Score Yourself All 8 correct 5 to 7 correct 3 to 4 correct 1 to 2 correct You must be working for the government. You applied for a job with the government. There's hope for you yet. You call it as you see it; I like you. What can we expect in a world where "a personal time control center" is a watch, "writing fluid" is ink, and "social expression products" are greeting cards? Teachers are now "learning facilitators," a sick person is "a compromised susceptible host," and a deadly missile is a "peacekeeper." Save yourself. Each of the these phrases is an example of doublespeak—artificial, evasive language. Doublespeak pretends to communicate but really doesn't. It is language that makes the bad seem good, the negative appear positive, the unpleasant become pleasant. It shifts responsibility and deliberately aims to distort and deceive. With doublespeak, words and facts don't agree. At the heart of any doublespeak is an incongruity between what is said and what is meant. When writers use doublespeak, they hide the truth. Always avoid doublespeak; use language truthfully. Doublespeak includes the following subcategories: • Jargon • Bureaucratic language • Inflated language • Euphemisms Let's look at each of these subcategories now. Jargon: "Phasers on Stun, Cap'n" What's love? To teenagers, it's a sweet stolen kiss by the lockers; to tennis players, it's zero, zip, nada. In the context of tennis, the word love is an example of jargon, the spe- cialized vocabulary of a particular group. Jargon fea- tures words that an outsider unfamiliar with the field You Could Look It Up _, might not understand. There's medical, legal, educa- Jargon is the specialized tional, and technological jargon. All sports, hobbies, vocabulary of a particular group. | a nd games have their own jargon, as do the arts. You Could Look It Up Doublespeak is artifi- cial, evasive language. Chapter 2^: Don't 60 There: Words and Expressions to Avoid 319 There's even nonsense jargon, such as the dilithium crystals, warp field, warp drive, and phasers of the Star Trek crew. As you write, consider your purpose and audience to decide whether a word is jargon in the context of your material. For example, a baseball fan would easily understand the terms shutout and homer, but these terms would be jargon to a nonfan. Using jargon with the appropriate audience communicates your meaning—but using jargon can unnec- essarily confuse readers. Here's the rule to live by: If a technical term has an equivalent in plain English, use the simpler term. Bureaucratic Language: Piled Higher and Deeper Bureaucratic language is stuffy, overblown language. It has two main characteristics: • Wordiness • Unnecessary complexity Bureaucratic language becomes meaningless because it is evasive and wordy. Call my bluff Take a minute to simplify the following example: The internal memorandum previously circulated should be ignored and disre- garded and instead replaced by the internal memorandum sent before the previ- ous one was sent. The memorandum presently at the current time being held by the appropriate personnel should be combined with the previous one to call attention to the fact that the previous one should be ignored by the reader. How about this simplification: Replace the previous memorandum with the one sent before the previous memo- randum. (Use the older version.) O Quoth the Maven , When should you use jargon? In a job application letter! In this instance, the jargon suggests that you're a person who knows the language of the specialty. It con- veys your competence. You Could Look It Up Bureaucratic language is stuffy, overblown language. 320 Part 5: Style: All the Write Stuff You Could Look It Up Inflated language makes the ordinary seem extraordinary. ^ 'y Quoth the Maven _ Instead of using whoopee words when you write an over-the- top letter of recommendation, include specific details and examples that highlight the per- son's accomplishments. Inflated Language: Full of Hot Air Inflated language makes the ordinary seem extraordi- nary. Here are some examples: • Automotive internists for car mechanics • Vertical transportation corps for elevator operators So-called "whoopee" words are a type of inflated lan- guage. These are words that are so overused that they've become practically meaningless. Here are some of the most annoying examples: fantastic, excel- lent, terrific, wonderful, fabulous, and marvelous. As you learned in the previous chapter, use words that are appropriate to your audience and purpose. In nearly all cases, the best choices are those most easily understood by your readers. Euphemisms: Sleeping with the Fishes What do all the following expressions have in common? • Cashed in his/her chips • Visiting the W.C. • Bit the big one • Potty trained • Kicked the bucket • Powdering my nose • Pushing up daisies • Seeing a man about a horse They're are all euphemisms, inoffensive or positive words or phrases used to avoid a harsh reality. The phrases on the left refer to death; those on the right refer to bath- room activities. Euphemisms are a type of doublespeak because they cloud the truth. You find them used with all potentially embarrassing topics, such as death, nudity, body parts, sex, aging, and bathroom activities. Euphemisms are not doublespeak when they are used to spare someone's feelings or out of concern for a recognized social custom, as when you say, "I am sorry your sister passed away," rather than "I am sorry your sister died." But most of the time, euphe- misms drain meaning from truthful writing. Avoid euphemisms if they obscure your meaning. Use them to spare someone's feelings, especially in delicate situations. Chapter Ik: Don't Go There: Words and Expressions to Avoid 3ZI Take My Word for It Perhaps no one has made better use of the sexual nuances that connect bathrooms and parts of the body than American humorist Dorothy Parker. Distressed that she was not meeting any men at her office, she hung a simple'sign over her office door. It said, "Gentlemen." Parker's office was soon inundated with a stream of male visitors. A triumph for the power of the euphemism! Search and Destroy Use the following checklist to identify doublespeak in all its guises. As you reread your own work to eliminate doublespeak, ask yourself these five questions: • What am I saying? • To whom is the remark addressed? • Under what conditions is the remark being made? • What is my intent? • What is the result of the remarks? The Cliché Expert As you read this section, be sure to keep your eyes peeled, your fingers crossed, and your head above water, and you may be able to keep up with the Joneses. But that's only if you're on the ball, beam, go, level, and up-and-up, rather than on the fly, fence, ropes, rocks, or lam. Or you can just go fry an egg. The previous paragraph is chock full of clichés, descriptive phrases that have lost their effectiveness through overuse. If you have heard the same words and phrases over and over, so has your reader. Replace clichés with fresh, new descriptions. If you can't think of a way to rewrite the phrase to make it new, delete it completely Give it a shot now. Complete this list by defining each cliché and then rewriting it to convey a more precise and descriptive meaning. You Could Look It Up Clichés are descriptive phrases that have lost their effec- tiveness through overuse. 322 PartS: Style: All the Write M Cliché 1. on the carpet 2. on the fritz 3. on the lam 4. on the make 5. on the spot 6. on the spur of the moment 7. on the wagon 8. sweet as sugar 9. raining cats and dogs 10. straight as an arrow Answers Did you get these answers? Cliché 1. on the carpet 2. on the fritz 3. on the lam 4. on the make 5. on the spot 6. on the spur of the moment 7. on the wagon 8. sweet as sugar 9. raining cats and dogs 10. straight as an arrow Meaning Meaning reprimanded broken fleeing eager for financial or sexual gain great difficulty spontaneously not drinking sweet raining heavily honest Remember, if you have a tough row to hoe, be a tough nut to crack and tough it out. Truth will win out and you can turn over a new leaf, turn the tables, other cheek, or the corner. Under a cloud? Not up to par, scratch, or snuff? Use your head; it's all water over the dam. After all: The world is your oyster—you can bet your bottom dollar! . lost their effec- tiveness through overuse. 322 PartS: Style: All the Write M Cliché 1. on the carpet 2. on the fritz 3. on the lam 4. on the make 5. on the spot 6. on the. one was sent. The memorandum presently at the current time being held by the appropriate personnel should be combined with the previous one to call attention to the fact that the previous. ignored by the reader. How about this simplification: Replace the previous memorandum with the one sent before the previous memo- randum. (Use the older version.) O Quoth the Maven ,