NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Getting along well with others is the real secret to success and happiness. In tens of thousands of classrooms we teach reading, writing, and arithmetic and yet we leave solutions to the universal problems of human relationships to be discovered, if at all, by trial and error. The trial is painful and the error is costly. People Tools: 54?Strategies for Building Relationships, Creating Joy, and Embracing Prosperity, provides timeproven techniques that you can use to build a better, happier, more successful life. It is the perfect resource for busy people looking for fast and effective solutions to the challenges we face every day. People Tools?are practical and easy to understand. From developing selfconfidence, to improving communication skills, to finding constructive ways to resolve conflict, each People Tool addresses a specific issue and provides a simple, straightforward strategy that you can adopt to bring about a positive result. Open the book to any page and you will find a useful solution. Each tool is illustrated with insightful stories and amusing anecdotes that are relevant and relatable. The stories will reel you in but the advice will change your life. ? ? This book will do a lot for the world. Bill Cosby Although you may recognize the more intuitive techniques in?People Tools, this sourcebook provides explanations and helpful examples from a vast collection of different tools designed to help you further expand your own existing repertoire of skills. Some of the useful People Tools in the book include: 1. The Belt Buckle. When words are different than action (The Belt Buckle), trust the Belt Buckle, not the words.? 2. Buy a Ticket. ?To make something good happen in your life you have to participate.? 3. Catching a Feather. An alternative to the endless chase, this Tool reveals how to attract people you want to be closer to. 4. Patterns Persist. Prior actions are predictive of future behaviors. 5. Catch Them Being Good. Rewards are more effective than punishments. People Tools?is organized into 54 chapters. Each chapter offers a lifechanging insight. Use them to live well, and your life will grow better for it.? Jack Kornfield, psychologist, author, and founder of Spirit Rock Meditation Center
[...]... answer, “Oh, are you going to call me again?” She didn’t know the invisible rule According to The Wall Street Journal , when Bank of America took over Security Pacific Bank there was “a clash of starkly different corporate cultures.” Many Security Pacific employees were forced out Kathleen Burke from Security Pacific was a notable exception “I sat down with a lot of Bank of America people to get a sense... lose the connection with my own core? Before I become a living contradiction? How many dashed expectations, raised by the promises of others, can I handle before I become cynical or withdrawn? “A week from Saturday?” “I really can’t commit myself that far in advance.” And we each hang up the phone, and there’s that crashing silence which everyone has experienced, filled with damage to us both because... conscious thoughts about why and how much I wanted to date her In fact, over more than thirty years I have used my education and extensive experience in psychology, accounting, and law to develop and practice a clear way of thinking, which I call People Tools. ” A People Tool” is a behavioral technique you can use to change your outlook Together they are like night vision binoculars peering into the darkness... the check itself “I’ll call you tomorrow” is not the same as calling tomorrow I’m sure that you have had similar experiences, and may have reached a similar conclusion On a deeper level, which we may not even be consciously aware of, is the injury on both sides of the belt buckle How many words can I slip out of by an opposite action before the sum of my small deceits takes its toll? How often can... life will change for the better You will have a much greater understanding of yourself and everyone you come into contact with People Tools have been invaluable to me in building relationships, creating joy, and embracing prosperity in my life I have accumulated quite a number of People Tools, and fifty-four of the best are in this book I hope that your life will be easier, and even more successful,... visible, to pour a coat of metaphorical paint over them, so that you can consciously choose either to follow or discard them (See a related chapter entitled “The Belt Buckle.”) The third People Tool on Rules is: Follow the Rules, visible and invisible, external and internal Other people will act in predictable, helpful ways when you follow their rules If you walk across the street in a marked crosswalk, automobile... out of chaos.” “Aha!” said the anarchist “And who created chaos?” Chaos and uncertainty abound, and every day I use the People Tool of Sunk Cost to focus my life on the future rather than the past, to help me achieve the result I want—joy, a satisfying relationship, or wealth Although I could try using my hand to pound a two-penny nail into a block of Douglas fir, I would be considerably more successful,... “Thou shalt not kill.” Law: “Writing a check for more money than is in your bank account is a crime, punishable by law.”) But there is also a second, parallel universe set of invisible rules, society’s actual standards of conduct that even your mother will not divulge All too often the invisible rule is the exact opposite of the visible “In some circumstances lying can be helpful.” Did your mother ever... honesty may be too much to expect of a high school student, but, as teenagers, we do form habits which last a lifetime Of course, being truthful allows us to get closer to each other because we discover who each of us really is Most people shine in that situation Truth not only builds trust but also helps to heal past injuries Words not followed with the expected action can be hurtful One such example involved... my relationships One People Tool I use often is to Dangle a Carrot in front of myself for motivation This entire book is a carrot to dangle in front of yourself I hope you find it tasty and enjoy the crunch of discovery The story is told of a doctor, a priest, and an anarchist arguing about which profession came first “It must have been medicine,” said the doctor “How else could Cain and Abel have been . 97 8-1 -5 907 9-1 4 2-4 eISBN: 9781590791455 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Fox, Alan C. People tools : 54 strategies for building relationships, creating joy, and embracing prosperity / Alan. my education and extensive experience in psychology, accounting, and law to develop and practice a clear way of thinking, which I call People Tools. ” A People Tool” is a behavioral technique. magic comes from. No doubt some part of the Alan Fox mystique comes from his considerable business success, which enables him to live comfortably with occasional flourishes of extravagance and