N g h i e n cijfu Gia dinh va Gioi So - Quan niem gi6i qua ca dao, tuc nguf Viet Nam Tran Thj PhUdng Anh Vien Nghien ciru Ton giao Tom tat: Tren cd sd phan tich ca dao va tuc ngQ Viet Nam, tac gia chi nhQng quan niem rap khuon va cac dinh kie'n tQ goc gidi NhQng quan niem dUdc xem xet tren ba khia canh, la ngoai hinh; tinh each, pham chat va vai tro, trach nhiem ciia phu nQ va nam gidi gia dinh va xa hoi Tac gia cho rfing chuan mUc kep ve ngoai hinh thUdng dan de'n, nhQng danh gia dinh kie'n, tham chi tha'p gia tri ciia ngUdi phu nQ so sanh vdi nam gidi Ca dao tuc ngQ cung nhan manh cac dae diem phfim chat, tinh each va vai tro, trach niem cua nam va nQ tren cd sd khudn mau gidi tinh ro ret Tac gia cho rang viec gan phu nQ vdi gia dinh nhU mot trach nhiem dUdng nhien, da han che cd hoi, sU lUa chon cua ngUdi phu nQ ciing nhU viec the hien nang lUc va tinh ddc lap ciia ho Txi khoa: Gidi; Dinh kie'n gidi; Quan niem gidi truyen tho'ng Dat van de Trong ndn van hofi truydn thd'ng Viet Nam, ngudi phy nu ddng vai trd quan trgng mgi mat cua cugc sd'ng O nhidu noi tren khfip dfit nudc, tyc thd Mfiu, thd cac nQ thfin rat phd bien, didu dd cho tha'y tu tudng coi ngudi phy nQ, dae biet la vai trd cua hg cugc sd'ng gia dinh Trai qua nhQng thang trfim, bidn ddi Iich su, dia vi ciia ngudi phu nQ gia dinh cung nhu ngoai xa hdi da cd nhidu bien ddi Dae biet la dudi finh hudng cua tu tudng nam khinh nu "nhfit nam vie't hQu, thap Tran Thi Phiidng Anh 67 nu vie't vd" cua Nho giao Trung Hoa sud't 1000 nam Bfic thudc, nhidu quan niem ve dia vi, vai trd cua ngudi phu nQ da thay ddi, dfin dfin hinh ndn nhQng dinh kie'n vd gidi cang khfit khe dd'i vdi phu nu (Le Thi Quy, 2009) NhQng quan diem danh gifi thap vai trd cua nQ gidi dugc luu truydn qua nhidu the' he, thdng qua nhidu hinh thuc, dd cd cfi nhung sang tac dan gian nhu ca dao, tyc ngQ Tim hidu quan didm dan gian vd vfin de la he't sQc cfin thie't, qua dd dd dfin dfin xoa bd nhQng dinh kie'n gidi dang can trd, chd'ng lai nhQng cd gfing nhfim nang cao nang lyc ngudi phy nu, keo lui sy phfit trien xa hdi Cho de'n nay, Chfnh phii cung cae td chQe xa hdi va cdng ddng ndi chung da cd nhieu hoat ddng nhfim thuc day binh dfing gidi vfi da thu dugc nhQng ttm khdng nhd viec xoa bd va gifim thidu bfit binh dfing vd gidi d Viet Nam Tuy nhien, dd xoa bd dugc hoan toan tinh trang bfit binh dang ve gidi thi cdn ddi hdi sy chuyen bien can bfin vd nhan thQc d mdi ngudi dan Dae biet, xet vd lau dai, viec giao dye cho the' he tie quan diem dung dfin vd vfin dd gidi la he't sQc cfin thie't va cd y nghia dae biet quan trgng, cfin chu trgng tQ dau Bdi tre em thudng dd dang tie'p nhan va hge tap tfit ca nhQng gi gia dinh, nha trudng va the' gidi ben ngoai tac ddng Nhirng dinh kie'n vd gidi cd the vd tinh dugc giao dye cho tre em thdng qua cac hanh dgng, ngdn tQ cfic em tidp xue bfing ngay, tQ dd hinh nen mdt md hinh bfit binh dfing vd gidi nhung lai dugc quan niem nhu chufin myc dd'i vdi tQng gidi Trong so nhQng thdng tin nay, ca dao, tyc ngQ dan gian dugc cac em tie'p can rfit sdm, cd thd tQ nhung cdn nfim ndi cho den di hoc va trudng di lam ngoai xa hdi Chfnh vi thd, tim hidu quan niem dan gian vd van gidi thdng qua ca dao, tyc ngQ la het sQc cfin thiet Qua dd, cd the giup chi nhQng quan niem lech lac vd binh dfing gidi va gdp phfin nang cao nhan thQc vd gidi va tQ dd gdp phfin cai thien binh dfing gidi d Viet Nam mgt each ben vQng Bai vidt chi mot sd quan niem vd gidi ca dao, tyc ngu Viet Nam lien quan de'n ngoai hinh, de'n tinh each, pham chfit va vai trd, trfich nhiem cua phu nu va nam gidi gia dinh va xa hdi Quan niem ve dae diem ngoai hinh cua phu nurva nam gidi Ngoai hinh ciia mdi ngudi la cha me sinh va hg se mai mai mang theo hinh dang dd Ngudi ta chi cd the cfii thien phfin nao ve be ngoai, ma thudng khdng thd quyet dinh thay ddi vd ngoai hinh cua minh hofin toan Tat nhien, ngoai trQ mgt sd rfit ft cd didu kien de phfiu thuat tham mT, vd'n chi cd thd thyc hien xa hdi hien dai nhd sy phat tridn cua cdng nghe va y hge Tuy nhien, nhu'ng dae diem vd ngoai hinh thudng lai dugc su dung nhu la thudc de danh gia tu each, phfim chfit, nang lyc cua mdi ngudi TQ gde nay, ehuan mye ve ngoai hinh ddi vdi ngudi 68 Nghien cQu Gia dinh va Gi6i Quyen 20, so 5, tr 66-73 phy nu la nhung dae didm tao cam giac cfin dugc che chd dugc va thudng nhung dae diem ay dugc gfin vdi khfi nang dam nhiem cdng viec gia dinh, cham sdc ngudi khfic Trong mdt sd cau tyc ngu ndi de'n viec chgn chgn nfing dau, ngudi ta thudng xem xet tdi nhQng yeu td pham chfit va ngoai hinh cua mdt ngudi phy nQ phu hgp vdi cdng viec gia dinh: "NhTmg ngudi thdt ddy lung ong, Dd kheo ciiieu chdng lgi kheo nuoi " Didu dudng nhu da trd mdt tidu chufin phd bie'n, khien cho didu nguge lai trd nen hie'm hoi, dd la viec mong mud'n mgt nang dau gidi viec xa hdi, hoc rdng, bie't nhidu Tuy nhien, chuan myc vd ngofii hinh thudng dugc sQ dung rat Iinh boat Mdt sd dae diem d ngudi dan dng dugc hidu la "dep", la "sang" thi d phy nQ lai bi cho la vd duyen, tham chi la nhung didu khdng td't Day la nhiing tieu chufin kep xufit phfit va gfin chat vdi quan niem vd vai trd cua timg gidi gia dinh va xa hdi: ''Ddn ong mieng rgng thi sang, Ddn bd mieng rgng tan lioang cda niid " Phai chang cung chinh vi nhung dinh kie'n ve ve ngoai ma da hinh suy nghT rfing da la phu nQ thi phai coi trgng, lo Ifing vd nhan sfic Vl the', ehinh phy nQ cung Ifiy ve ben ngofii lam thudc gia tri cua ngudi minh: "Ldy clidng cho ddng tdm chdng, Bd cong trang diem md hdng rdng den " Dieu khdng chi dung vdi nhQng ngudi gai xua Ngay vfin cdn nhidu ban gai cd cho rfing nhan sfic la mdt Igi the' quan trgng quye't dinh hdn nhan Hg cd gfing cham chut, cai thien vd mat ngoai hinh, cd't lam ed the Ifiy dugc mdt tam chdng xQng dang, dd sau cd thd "nhd cay" dugc Cung vl the sau lap gia' dinh, khdng ft phy nu cd xu hudng "an phan", va tiep tuc ty trdi budc minh vao nhung dinh kien dd'i vdi nQ gidi Quan niem ve tinh each, pham chat cua phu ni/va nam gidi Ca dao Viet Nam cd rfit nhidu cau ca khuyen nhu ngudi phy nQ cfin cd nhung tfnh each nhu the' nao, cdn nam gidi cfin nhQng pham chat Mot mat, mgi pham chfit, tfnh cfich tdt ddu cfin thie't cho ca hai gidi Vi the, xet d khi'a canh nfiy thi nhung Idi khuyen ran dd ddu mang tfnh chat tfch cyc Nhung mat khae, ye'u td bfit binh dfing gidi the hien d nhQng pham chat quy dinh ridng vdi tQng gidi Quan niem cho rfing mfiu hinh ngudi phu nu ly tudng la ngudi dju dang, kheo leo, nhudng nhin, vi tha, bie't hy sinh, sd'ng vi ngudi khfic; cdn nam gidi phfii dung cam, manh me, khdn ngoan, quye't doan, nhu cau "Cha khon me klieo" Mot ngudi gai dugc danh gia cao d sy nQ tinh, nhung nu tinh ay lai ty le nghich vdi sy ddc lap ciia hg Thudng mdt ngudi gai td ye'u dudi, phy thudc se gianh dugc cfim tinh va sy uu fii cua nhQng ngudi khae Tran Thi Phiidng Anh 69 hon la mgt ngudi gai manh me, ludn td can dfim, ddc lap va sSn sang dfin than Mgt ngudi phy nQ khdn ngoan khdng phai ngudi phy nu tham vgng, gidi giang ma la ngudi phy nQ bie't each lya chgn cho minh mdt ngudi dan dng td't va phu hgp nhfit dd lam chd dya, che chd cho minh: 'Thuyen mgnh ve ldi, gdi mgnh ve chong" Dinh kie'n gidi ap dat cho ngudi phy nu su phu thudc bfit di bat dich vao ngudi dan dng gia dinh Ngay ca ngudi phu nQ mud'n thd hien sy ddc lap ciia hg, hg dudng nhu cung khdng the lya chgn didu ay vdi nhiing dinh kie'n keo dai hang tram nam ve than phan ngudi gai phai gfin vdi sy phy thudc: "Thdn em nhu tdm lua ddo, Phdt giica dig biet vdo tay ai" Khi d nha la phy thudc vao cha me, den Ifiy chdng, sy phy thudc dd dugc chuyen sang ngudi chdng: "Song sdu thuyen phdi theo be, Ldm thdn gdi piidi nghe ldi chdng" Khi xay bfit hda md'i quan he vg chdng thi ngudi phy nQ nen la ngudi chu ddng lam lanh, chiu nhun Cung ehinh d diem mfi ngudi phu nQ dugc nggi ca la ngudi giQ vai trd didu hoa cac mdi quan he gia dinh, ngudi "giQ lua" cho gia dinh: Chdng gidn thi vg ldm Idnh IVlieng cudi hdn hd rang: anh gidn gi Thua anh anh gidn em chi l\dudn lay vg le em thi ldy cho Song song vdi nhung dinh kie'n khfit khe dd'i vdi phy nQ la ddng tu tudng tie'n bg vd mdi quan he vg chdng- nhidu trudng hgp, sy finh hudng, chi phdi cua ngudi phu nu cdn dugc dfinh gia cao ban tie'ng ndi ciia nam gidi, nhu cau: "Lenh ong khong bdng cdng bd" Md'i quan he nfiy tren thyc te' dugc the hien het sQc uydn chuydn, dd la vd hinh thQc, ngudi dfin dng vfin la ngudi quye't dinh mgi vfin dd nhung ndi tinh ben lai chiu khdng it anh hudng tQ nhung quan didm, y kie'n ciia ngudi phy nu Vi vay nen cd cau "Thudn vg, thudn chdng tdt bien Dong cung cgn" Tuy nhien ' ngudi vg dugc khuyen la nen phyc tung vfi phy thudc vao ngudi chdng dd giQ gin sy ydn fim vfi hanh phuc gia dinh Do dd, nhu mdt sy thd'ng nhat ngfim mdi gia dinh, ngudi phy nQ cd thd dugc phep cd y kien nhung ngudi quye't dinh phai la nam gidi NhQng ddi hdi vd vai trd dd'i vdi ngudi phu nQ cd the ggi de'n suy nghT cho rfing nhidu hoan canh, ngudi phy nQ gidng nhu mdt thQ trang sQc dep de nhfim tdn vinh them gia tri va sue manh thd'ng tri cua nam gidi: "Gdi ngoan ldm sang chg ciidng, Buon bdn rugng ddng, mgt ndng iiai sucfng " day, ehu "ngoan" khdng ehi dugc xem xet tu khia canh dao dQc, pham chat ma cdn ddi hdi ca sy phyC tung cua ngudi phy nQ Du la mdt 70 Nghien curu Gia dinh va Gidi Quyen 20, so 5, tr 66-73 ngUdi khdn ngoan, sfic de'n dau thi hg vfin nen td ye'u dudi, kem cdi va tham chi ngu dd't hon nam gidi Chi cd nhu vay mdi dep mat ca hai vg chdng Mdt ngudi phy nu dugc khen la gidi giang neu cd hdi ty dugc nhung ye'u td vd phfim hanh nhu diu dang, ne't na, nhin nhyc, kheo leo va dam dang cdng viec gia dinh hon la mgt ngudi phy nQ thdng minh Ben canh dd, mdt pham chat nQa dugc danh gia cao d ngudi phy nQ la sy chung thuy va tie't hanh Dae biet xa hdi cu thi didu nfiy dugc xem xet mdt cfich khfit khe, nghiem ngat vdi nhiing cau ran de nhu: "Gdi chica hoang, cdc vdng kliong ldy", hay mdt sd cau ca dao: "Trai thdi trung hie'u ldm ddu, Gdi thdi ngiiia tiet ldm cdu rdn minh " Ddng thdi xa hdi cung dua cac hinh phat nghiem khfic, nang nd dd trQng tri nhQng cd gai khdng giQ gin trinh tie't cua minh: Phinh phinh nhdn gida nhdn Me chdng d nhd dugc ddu (J nhd ldng bdt vg trdu Ciio nen phdi ddm ddu di Trong dd, nam gidi dugc ggi la "nhQng ke di chinh phuc" Chuan myc xa hdi khdng nhung khdng phe phan ngudi nam d phfim chfit nay, nguge lai, hg cdn cd the dugc danh gia la "nam tfnh" ban neu chQng td dugc kha nang chinh phuc cua minh "Cfii tai, cai gan" cua hg dugc qua khfi nang chinh phuc phy nQ: "Trai tdi ldy ndm ldy bdy, Gdi chinh chuyen chi ldy mgt ciiong " Hay.- "Ddn ong mgt trdm id gan Ld d cung vg Id toan cimg ngudi? Chung thuy la phfim chat can thiet d cfi hai gidi va cfin sy giu gin tQ ca hai phia, dd khdng phai trach nhiem ciia rieng ngudi phy nQ Bdi vdi mdi ngudi dan dng khdng chung thuy thi phai cd mgt ngudi phy nQ khdng chung thuy Nhung xa hgi lai len fin, chi trfich ngudi phy nQ, budc hg phai thQa nhan pham hanh thfip kem ma ddi chi vl sy nhe da, ca tin Tren thyc te, cd thd khdng phai mgi trudng hgp ddu bfit ngudn tu sy xud'ng cfip dao dQc, sy nhe da, ca tin cua ngudi phu nQ cd the xufit phfit tQ cugc sd'ng it trai nghiem cua ho, nhiing khudn mfiu gidi tinh tao nhiing khfic biet trach nhiem gia diiih, chi trfich nhiem cua phy nu d nha mdt each khdng can xQng vfi ban che' co hdi cua hg d mdi trudng ben ngoai (Barbara Kellerman va Deborah L Rhode, 2009) Phu nu dugc khuyen nen Ifiy gia dinh Ifim myc tieu hang dfiu, khdng nen qua nhiet tinh dd'i vdi cac cdng viec ngofii xa hgi, chinh nhQng cdng viec dua lai nhidu trfii nghiem, cfic ca hgi da dang va sy lya chon khdn ngoan ban Vi the', dd phfin ddi lai dinh kie'n cho rfing trinh tie't la thudc dao dQc va gia tri cua cd gfii, dan gian cung cd khdng it cau ca dao da kich lai quan niem nfiy: Ldng lo ciing chdng co mdn T r a n Thi Phxidng Anh 71 Ciiinh chuyen cung chdng son son de thd Lang lo chet ciing ma Chinh chuyen diet cung khieng ngodi ddng Ham y cau ca dao khdng phai khuyen khfch nhQng ngudi gfii lang la, ma dd la sy bfit man, ddi quydn binh dfing cita ngudi phy nQ Tham chi dan gian cdn dat nhung cau ca dao tha'p gifi tri cua ngudi dfin dng, thay vao dd ngudi phy nu dugc dd cao nhu bai ca dao: Gdi ciiinh chuyen ldy dugc chin chdng Ve vien bd lo gdnh gdng'di choi Chdng may quang diet ig roi Bd ldm ngdm chin noi, chin chdng Quan niem ve nang lut, vai trd, trach nhiem eua phu nuf va nam gidi Gia dinh la noi vai trd cua ngudi phy nu dugc dfinh gia cao nhfit, noi ghi nhan ddng gdp cua ngudi phy nQ sud't cugc ddi minh Cd the thfiy rfing quan niem truydn thd'ng, mdi trudng gia dinh la noi thich hgp nhfit de ngudi phy nu the hien tai kheo leo eua minh, va cung la noi thich hgp nha't dd'i Vdi nang lyc, kha nang cua ngudi phy nQ Khdng it cau ca dao, tyc ngu dd cao vai trd cua ngudi phy nQ gia dinh: "Niid kho cdy vg Men, nudc logn nhd tudng gidi" Khi nhd vd cdng on sinh thanh, dudng due cua cha me, dd td ldng tdn kinh, de cao vai trd cua ngudi me ma hinh tugng ngudi me thudng dugc ldn trudc vdi tinh cfim tran trgng va yeu thuang nhfit: "Ai ve toi giti budng cau Budng trudc kinh me, budng sau kinh thdy" Ddng thdi, gia dinh cung la noi ghi nhan mdt each cdng bfing nhfit nhQng cdng lao, nd lyc cufi ngudi phy nu Tuy nhien, cung chinh gia dinh la noi trdi budc trach nhiem cua ngudi phy nu vao cdng viec hang va eoi dd nhu la vai trd duong nhien cua cfi nhan chQ khdng phai vai trd ma mdi gidi cd the ddng gdp ddi vdi gia dinh Mgt each vd hinh chung didu tao kie'n cdng viec gia dinh Ifi trfich nhiem cua ca nhan nhQng sinh da la phy nu va hg khdng cd sy lya chgn nao khfic Trong he thd'ng ca dao, tuc ngu Viet Nam, khdng it cau dinh hudng cho mdi gidi vd vai trd, trach nhiem ciia hg Theo dd, mac du phy nQ khdng phai ngudi cd tie'ng ndi quydt dinh nhung lai la ngudi dam duang chu yeu nhidu cdng viec chinh ciia gia dinh nhu nudi day cai, cham sdc ngudi gia va tre em, lao ddng viec nha va lam kinh te" Trong dd, nam gidi dugc dinh hudng ngoai xa hdi nhu hge hanh, khoa cQ de dd dat lam quan: Con oi mudn nen tiidn ngicdi Lang tai nghe ldy nhiing ldi me cha Gdi thdi del gd'm theu hoa 72 Nghien curu Gia dinh va Gidi Quyen 20, so 5, tr 66-73 Khi vdo canh cid theu thiia Trai thdi dgc sdch ngdm nga Dili mdi kinh sic dechd dgi khoa Nua mai ndi ddng ngiiiep niid Tricdc Id mdt mat, sau Id hien tlidn Ben canh dd, mac du cung tham gia lao ddng va tham chi cdn la lao ddng chinh gia dinh, tryc tie'p tao cua cfii nhung quydn quye't dinh cfic vfin dd lien quan den kinh te' cung nhu quan Iy tai san lai thudc ve nam gidi Tidn cua hai vg chdng lam hoac ciia ngudi chdng hay ngudi vg Ifim cung ggi la ciia chdng ca: "Trai tay kliong ciidtig dn mdy vg, Gdi trdm vgn Cling the nhd chdng" Gia dinh la mdi trudng dau tien, gfin gui va eg ban nhfit gifio dye tre em nhQng nam dau tien eua cugc ddi Tre em nhin nhan va hge tap vd the gidi xung quanh thdng qua nhQng sy vat, sy viec gia dinh va nhidu em coi mfiu hinh Iy tudng la nhQng ngudi than gia dinh Do dd, cfic nha giao dye ludn khfing dinh gia dinh la mdi trudng xa hdi hofi dfiu tien cua mdi ngudi Nhung gia dinh cung chi'nh la noi dfiu tien xa hgi hoa ve sy bfit binh dfing gidi cho tre em thdng qua vai trd, boat ddng cua mdi vien Mdt gia dinh dugc coi Ifi mfiu myc, dugc xa hoi coi trong, gia dinh, ngudi cha ludn giQ vai trd try cdt, tao nen sy viing vang cho td fim Va cai thudng sg cfii uy nghiem cua ngudi cha, "Me noi mgt trdm, khong bdng dia ngdm mgt tieng" Nhung trach nhiem day dd, bao-ban cfii dugc cho la ngudi phu nQ Va mfic ldi Ifim, ngudi me phai nhan trach nhiem vd minh qua ldi due ket ngfin gon: "Con dgi cdi mang" hay "Con hu tgi me, didu hit tgi bd" Mac du cai chiu anh hudng tQ cfi cha me va nhidu ngudi khfic gia dinh, khdng phai chi tQ sy gifio due cua ngudi bfi, ngudi me, nhung quan didm vfin cdn tdn tai suy nghT eua nhidu ngudi hien Ket luan Quan niem truyen thd'ng eua dan tdc Viet Nam thd hien sy tie'n bd qua quan didm khdng phan biet nam nu, trai gai ran day rfing: "Gdi md du, trai md chi, Sinh co ngdi c6 nghi Id hon " Ddi vdi cha me, sinh cfii thi nao cung Ifi cua minh, cung ddu mang nang de dau chin thang mudi ngay, nao cung ldn len tQ bau sQa me, dudi sy san sdc, giao dye cua cha me va mong chd cfii Idn len ngudi Vi the', du sinh la gai hay trai thi ddu quy trgng nhu nhau, quan la ngudi phfii bie't hie'u nghTa ddi vdi dng ba cha me Dd chinh la didu ldp ngudi trudc trdng dgi d the' he di sau va cha dng xua ludn ran day cha me sinh khdng nen phan biet gidi T r a n Thi Phiftfng Anh 73 tinh nam- nu Qua tim hidu, phan tich mdt sd cau ca dao, tyc ngQ Viet Nam cho thay cung vdi mdt sd tu tudng tien bd thi vfin cdn nhidu han che each nhin nhan vd ngudi phy nu Viec ghi nhan cdng lao cua phy nu gia dinh ben canh ye'u td tich cyc la tao dugc vi the nhat dinh cua ngudi phy nQ gia dinh thi ddng thdi cung cd nghTa la gfin chat vai trd cita hg pham vi gia dinh vdi nhiing chQc nang sinh de, cham sdc cai, lao ddng san xufit, tai san xufit, ma hfiu nhu quen di va khdng tao didu kien dd hg dugc tham gia vfio cac hoat ddng ngoai xa hdi Tu dd tao mfiu hinh ngudi phy nu Iy tudng la ngudi phy nu sd'ng gia dinh, hy sinh vi gia dinh Dinh kie'n gidi the hien qua cac cau ca dao, tyc ngu Viet Nam khdng chi dua khudn mfiu cho sy phan chia trach nhiem khdng can xQng cua phu nil d nha ma cdn ban che' nhung co hdi cua hg d the gidi ben ngoai Sy phy thudc cua ngudi phy nQ vao ngudi chdng da can trd co hoi phat trien ban than va nang cao nang lyc cua hg Nhung dinh kidn vd gidi thd hien qua quan niem vd dae diem, tinh cfich, phfim chfit cua mdi gidi, tQ dd quy dinh nang lyc, trfich nhiem, vai trd cua tQng gidi Ngfiy nay, mac du ngudi phy nu da cd dugc vi the' dang kd gia dinh va ngoai xa hdi, nhien hg vfin phfii chfip nhan su bfit binh dang vd gidi didn cugc sdng hfing ngay, bdi nhung dinh kien gidi da an sau vao tu tudng cita mdi ngudi Ngay gidi tre, mdt sd ban cho rfing nhiing bat binh dang vd gidi la didu khdng the tranh dugc, du mud'n hay khdng thi vfin can didn nhu the' ne'u khdng mud'n mdt cugc sd'ng "khfic thudng" Cdn cd quan niem rfing nhiing ngudi phy nQ mfi su dam me danh cho cdng viec, khoa hge, sy nghiep Idn hon sy nhiet tinh ddi vdi nhung trfich nhiem "cd huu" cua gidi nQ thi phfin Idn hg se phai dQng ben ngoai hanh phuc gia dinh Do dd, dd cai thien dugc tinh trang bfit binh dfing vd gidi dang didn hien nay, trudc hdt phfii thay ddi dugc nhan thQc cita mgi ngudi dd'i vdi vfin dd Trong dd, ca dao tyc ngQ mang dinh kidn gidi cung cfin dugc phan tich, dfinh gifi de tranh nhQng nhan thQc sai Ifim gdp phan lam gia tang sy bat binh dang giQa nam va nQ • Tai lieu tham khao Barbara Kellerman & Deborah L Rhode 2009 Pliii nit vd quyen lanh dgo Nxb.Tdng hgp Ddng Nai Lan Huong 2005 Ca dao Viet Nam ve dnh yeu ddi Ida Nxb Van boa Thdng tin Lan Huong 2005 Ca dao Viet Nam ve gia dinh Nxb Van hoa Thong tin Le Thi Quy 2009 Gido trinh Xd hgi hoc Gidi Nxb Giao due Ma Giang Lan 2005 Tuc ngU ca dao ddn ca Viet Nam Nxb Van hge ... gidi d Viet Nam mgt each ben vQng Bai vidt chi mot sd quan niem vd gidi ca dao, tyc ngu Viet Nam lien quan de'n ngoai hinh, de'n tinh each, pham chfit va vai trd, trfich nhiem cua phu nu va nam. .. ngudi me, nhung quan didm vfin cdn tdn tai suy nghT eua nhidu ngudi hien Ket luan Quan niem truyen thd'ng eua dan tdc Viet Nam thd hien sy tie'n bd qua quan didm khdng phan biet nam nu, trai gai... hudng "an phan", va tiep tuc ty trdi budc minh vao nhung dinh kien dd'i vdi nQ gidi Quan niem ve tinh each, pham chat cua phu ni/va nam gidi Ca dao Viet Nam cd rfit nhidu cau ca khuyen nhu ngudi phy