The 100x leader how to become someone worth following

100X LEADER THE HOW TO BECOME SOMEONE WORTH FOLLOWING JEREMIE KUBICEK & STEVE COCKR AM The100X Leader 100X Leader The HOW TO BECOME SOMEONE WORTH FOLLOWING Jeremie Kubicek & Steve Cockram Cover image: Henry Be on Unsplash Cover design: Wiley Copyright © 2019 by Pub House, LLC All rights reserved Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey Published simultaneously in Canada No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, Inc., 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, (978) 750-8400, fax (978) 646-8600, or on the Web at www.copyright.com Requests to the Publisher for permission should be 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and services or for technical support, please contact our Customer Care Department within the United States at (800) 762-2974, outside the United States at (317) 572-3993 or fax (317) 572-4002 Wiley publishes in a variety of print and electronic formats and by print-on-demand Some material included with standard print versions of this book may not be included in e-books or in print-on-demand If this book refers to media such as a CD or DVD that is not included in the version you purchased, you may download this material at http://booksupport.wiley.com For more information about Wiley products, visit www.wiley.com Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data: Names: Kubicek, Jeremie, author | Cockram, Steve, author Title: The 100X leader : how to become someone worth following / Jeremie Kubicek, Steve Cockram Description: Hoboken, New Jersey : John Wiley & Sons, Inc., [2019] | Includes index | Identifiers: LCCN 2018043695 (print) | LCCN 2018045132 (ebook) | ISBN 9781119519478 (Adobe PDF) | ISBN 9781119519454 (ePub) | ISBN 9781119519447 (hardcover) Subjects: LCSH: Leadership Classification: LCC HD57.7 (ebook) | LCC HD57.7 K81545 2019 (print) | DDC 658.4/092–dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2018043695 Printed in the United States of America 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 I want to dedicate this work to my dad, Mike Kubicek, who has constantly fought for my highest possible good You are my hero and a leader worth following! —Jeremie For Helen, Izzy, Megan, and Charlotte—thank you for sharing this incredible adventure with me, with all my love —Steve Contents Introductionix Section I  Developing You Chapter Choosing to Climb03 Chapter The Making of a Sherpa 19 Chapter Your Ultimate Test 35 Chapter Know Yourself to Lead Yourself 57 Chapter Five Circles of Influence 71 Section II  Getting Others to a Higher Level Chapter The Higher Levels Chapter Developing Others and Managing Expectations113 Chapter Becoming a Multiplication Master vii 95 135 viii Contents Section III  Creating 100X Cultures Chapter Creating the Atmosphere for Growth 155 Chapter 10 Someone Worth Following 175 Chapter 11 The Sherpa Challenge 191 Our Gift to You 205 Acknowledgments207 About the Authors 211 About GiANT Worldwide 213 Speaking Inquiries for Jeremie Kubicek and Steve Cockram 215 Index217 Index unmet, 123 unrealistic, 39–41, 124 Expectations Scale, 123, 124, 129 Eye contact, 59 Family: culture of, 156 expectations of, 129 ignoring, 78–79 inhibitions in, 26 leadership of, 72, 73, 78–81 Farmer, Deanna, 130 Fear, 25, 27–30 abdication due to, 49 creating culture of, 88 in dominating leadership, 44 engendered by unrealistic expectations, 39–40 in toxic cultures, 164–165 Fighting for highest good of others, 36, 106–112, 198 moving from serving to, 111–112 recognizing time for, 108–110 Filer, Cindi, 47–48 Five Circles of Influence, 72–73 223 assessing behaviors in, 84–85 community, 83–84 family, 78–81 managing expectations in, 129 organization, 82–83 self, 76–78 and Support-Challenge Matrix, 84–85 team, 81–82 Five Voices color code test, 84–85 Focus: of Sherpa, 200 on values, 165 on vision, 165, 197 Ford Motor Company, 173 “For others” mindset, 105–106, 201 Fruitfulness, 174 Gap(s): credibility, 180–181, 184–185 eliminating, 184–185 integrity, 182–185 Getting others to higher levels: developing others, 113–122 224 Index Getting others (continued) holding people accountable, 130–133 liberating leadership for, 95–112 managing expectations, 123–129 through multiplication, 135–152 GiANT TV, 198, 205 GiANT Worldwide, 107, 192, 199 Giving, of what you don’t possess, 16 González, Ricardo, 156 Gordon International Training, 115 Green, Nick, 43 Greenhouse metaphor, for culture, 159–160 Growth: continuous, 188–190 and culture as atmosphere, 159–166 See also Atmosphere for growth culture of, 21, 161 of leaders, 162 and a life worth living, 57 Guides, choosing, 198–199 Habit(s): culture built from, 162 domination as, 44 excellence as, 162 in fighting for others’ highest good, 109 reality resulting from, 65–66 See also Patterns of actions and behavior “Have to,” “want to” vs., x Healthy cultures, 172–174 Healthy leaders, 8–9 See also 100X leaders/leadership checkup for, 13–18 consistency of, 75–76 healing for, 107 as leaders worth following, 69–70 for multiplication, 17 Heifetz, Ronald, 37–38 Hiding, 28–29 Hierarchy of Competence, 115–119 Highest good in others See also Getting others to higher levels fighting for, 36, 106–112 taking others higher, 97–100 Hill, Joe, 31 Hillary, Edmund, 57, 191–192 Hinting, 46–47, 126 Hodge, Hunter, 150 Holistic leadership, Holm, Jeff, 161 Index Holm, Molly, 79 Honesty, 98 Horrell, Mark, 191–192 Humility, 18, 21, 74, 76, 199, 204 Hutchins, Brandon, xii Ildan, Mehmet Murat, 95 Impossible expectations, 124 Incompetence: conscious, 38–39, 64, 115, 116, 118, 120 unconscious, 63, 64, 70, 115–118 Increasing Conscious Competence, 119 Influence, 71–91 circles of, xi See also Five Circles of Influence and consistency, 75–76 and credibility or integrity gaps, 178–183 of dominating leaders, 44 in extreme busyness, 59 and growth, 162 as inside-out game, 73 and intentionality, 75 in leadership, 69 of liberating leaders, 50 in liberation journey, 74–75, 86–91 maximizing, 38 225 self-awareness for, 73 in your community, 83–84 in your family, 78–81 in your organization, 82–83 on yourself, 76–78 in your team, 81–82 Information proliferation, xi Informing, multiplication by, 140–141 Inhibitions, 24–27 evaluating, 26–27 in multiplication kryptonite, 151–152 prohibitions vs., 24–25 Inner health, 197 Inner voice, 76 Integrity, 182–183 eliminating gaps in, 184–185 modeling, 72 of Sherpa, 175–176 Intentionality, 75 in changing tendencies, 66–67 in choosing actions, 63, 64 in creating culture, 161 in defining culture, 156 in every area of life, 185 in family circle, 79 226 Index Intentionality (continued) in journey toward liberating leadership, 74–76 in leadership, 74 in leadership journey, 195 legacy of, 114 in liberating others, 100 in living, 8, 57–58 in multiplication, 136–140, 148–151 in self-improvement, 21 of Sherpa, 36 in targeting areas of growth/learning, 61 Intentional transfer plan, 148–151 Intent of leaders, 54 Into Thin Air (Jon Krakauer), 176 Irrelevance, 181, 183 Jangbhu, 35 Kaloostian, Damita, 51–62 Kersey, Kayla, 87–88 Knowledge, intentional transfer of, see Multiplication Know Yourself to Lead Yourself, 60, 61, 65, 107 See also Self-awareness Kofron, Clay, 33–34 Krakauer, Jon, 176 Language: leveraging, 197 in organizational culture, 156–158 Language Components of a Healthy Culture, 157–158 Lantz, Suzi, 186–188 Lara, Mickie, 139 Lazy leaders, 89 Leader(s), x–xi authentic, 72, 73, 90 becoming the best, 199–200 culture defined by, 69, 156, 159 healthy, 8–9, 13–18, 69–70, 75–76, 107 intentionality in, 57–58 intent of, 54 with lack of attention, 180–181 lazy, 89 100X, see 100X leaders/ leadership out-of-touch, 179–180 in real life, xii responsibility for personal growth of, 162 Index shaping of, 15 subcultures defined by, 166–168 toxic culture traced back to, 164–165 traditional, 23 training of, 20 transformation of, xi–xii, 10 See also Developing you unexamined, 58 who are all talk, no action, 181 who are worth following, 69–70 See also Being someone worth following Leaders Define Culture tool, 166–168 Leadership: accidental vs intentional, 74, 75, 136, 160, 195 applied, 20 art of, 41 for the benefit of others, xiii biggest problem in, 66–67 defined, 37 failure of, 75 in Industrial Age, 72 in living out principles, 68–69 227 noble role of, 98 100X, see 100X leaders/ leadership Leadership journey: acknowledging your, 14–15 courage for, 22 influence and supportchallenge in, 86–91 intentional growth in, 189–190 as journey of being intentional, 195 as journey of selfawareness, 60–66 pit of despair in, 116, 119–121 requirements for, 23 tendencies and patterns in, 188–189 as trainer of the leader, 20 Learning: applied, xii to fight instead of serve, 111–112 in multiplication by training, 141–142 shift in ways of, xi Legacy: of 100X life, 114 of leaders, 202, 203 unlocking your magic for, 137–138 228 Index Lencioni, Pat, 75, 172–173 Lewington, Mark, 90 Liberating leadership, 42, 50–52, 95–112, 202–203 See also 100X leaders/leadership commitment to depth in, 100–101 in community, 84 defined, 97 different perceptions of, 90–91 dominating leadership vs., 45 in family, 79–80 fighting for highest good in others, 108–110 how to get people to change, 101–104 influence and supportchallenge in journey to, 86–91 intentionality in journey toward, 74–76 learning to fight instead of serve, 111–112 managing subcultures in, 170–171 moving toward, 52–54 secret to transformation in, 106–108 to take others higher, 97–100 why being “for others” works, 105–106 as worth following, 185–188 See also Being someone worth following Liberating Others tool, 97–98, 101, 143 Liberators Intent, 103–104 Life/living: accidental, 57, 74, 78 intentional, 74 Loftus, Gavin, 81–82 Loss, fear of, 28 Love: defined, 61 in fighting for others’ highest good, 109 speaking truth in, 98, 141 Magic: multiplication of, 137–140 understanding your, 150–151 Making Your Leadership Come Alive (Jeremie Kubicek), 41 Managing expectations, 123–129 in circles of influence, 129 and communication of expectations, 125–129 exercise for, 125 Index Expectations Scale in, 123, 124 and personality type, 124 process for, 127–128 Manipulation: in dominating leadership, 44, 89 fear-inducing, 88 health effects of, 163 Marriage: inhibitions in, 26 resetting expectations in, 129 Maslow, Abraham, 115 Mental ability, Mental makeup, 77 “The Mental Strategies of Elite Climbing Sherpas” (Kate O’Keefe), 176–177 Mindset: of being “for others,” 105–106, 201 for climbing Everest, 4, of “have to” vs “want to,” x of Industrial Age leaders, 72 inhibitions in, 26 of 100X leaders, 23–24 of Sherpa, 76–77 Mirror, metaphorical, 106 229 Mistrust, with protecting leadership, 46 Moore, Pattye, 71 Moral character, 182–183 Motivation: challenge as, 38 of climbers, 136 of 100X leaders, xiii as performance factor, 132 Mount Everest, ix acclimating to, 7, Backler’s ascent of, 35–36 Beede’s ascent of, 3–8 climbing, 95 deaths on, 176, 177, 191–192 death zone of, 4–5 famous climbers of, 97 Sherpa name for, 20, 76 as trainer for Sherpa, 20 Multiplication, xi–xii, 135– 152 See also Developing others by apprenticeship, 143–146 by coaching, 142–143 cost of, 194 defined, 10 fruits of, 195 and health of leader, 17 by informing, 140–141 intentional, 136–140 230 Multiplication (continued) intentional transfer plan for, 148–151 of magic, 137–140 and multiplication kryptonite, 151–152 ranking your preferred methods of, 146–148 by training, 141–142 Multiplication kryptonite, 151–152 Nielsen, Rasmus, 96 Norgay, Tenzing, 113, 191–192 Norms, in organizational culture, 156 Nuru, 6–7 O’Berski, Dan, 11–12 Oechsner, Mike, 45–46 O’Keefe, Kate, 76–77, 176–177 Onboarding, 171–172 100 leaders, 198 100X assessment, 201 100X leaders/leadership, ix–x, 19–34 See also specific topics areas of life for, 10, 197–198 authors’ passion for, 199–200 Index breakthroughs in, 30–32 core motivation in, xiii counting the cost of, 33–34 defined, 8–9 health check for, 13–14 key attributes of, 21 leaders as multipliers, 23 legacy of, 114 mindset for, 23–24 100 leaders vs., 198 overcoming inhibitions for, 24–27 rewards of, 201–202 secret of, xii–xiii self-learning in, 32–33 self-preservation and, 27–31 Onysko, Mary, 49–50 Opinions, credible, 178 Oppedahl, Mike, 29, 149–150 Organization: culture of, 156 expectations of, 129 inhibitions in leadership inside, 26–27 leadership in, 73, 82–83 performance issues related to, 131 shaping, 162–163 Out-of-touch leaders, 179–180 Index Overprotection, 29–30 Patterns of actions and behavior: choosing to change, 66, 72, 74 consequences of, 64–65 in families, 80 in fighting for others’ highest good, 109 in liberating others, 98 self-awareness of, 62 working through, 188–189 Performance Diagnostic Tool, 130–133 Personality: and culture, 156 and expectations, 124 Phillips, Suzanne, 103, 104 Pit of despair, 116, 119–121 Plotting your course, 196–198 Positive thinking, 76–77 Prairie at Post, 83–84 Preclimb checklist, 17–18 Pride, 136 Productivity: and company culture, 165 in healthy culture, 173–174 Prohibitions, 24–25 231 Protecting leadership, 42, 46–48 in family, 79 in multiple circles of influence, 89–90 subcultures with, 168 on teams, 81 unrealistic expectations in, 124 Proving yourself, 29–30 Pulford, Paige, 99–100 Rader, Greg, 129 Rader, Tracy, 129 Raising up, for transformation, 107–108 Readiness to climb, 195–196 Reality: being someone worth following in, 183–184 changing, 60, 61 everyday, 183–184 and protecting leadership, 89–90 quantifying, 201 self-awareness of, 65–66 Reflection, 197 for abdicating leaders, 50 on community leadership, 84 for dominating leaders, 46 on family leadership, 80 232 Index Reflection (continued) for liberating leaders, 52 and a life worth living, 57 on managing expectations, 125 on multiplication, 152 on organization leadership, 83 for protecting leaders, 48 on self-leadership, 78 on team leadership, 82 on your journey to date, 14–15 Re-Orient (Kevin Weaver), 61 Reputation, 53, 62, 184 Respect, 98 Restoration, for transformation, 107 Return on investment (ROI): in apprenticeship, 144 in informing, 141 in multiplication, 195 in training, 142 Rohn, Jim, 172 ROI, see Return on investment Roles, common language regarding, 158 Safety, common language regarding, 158 Saxum, 138–139 Security, 18 Self-awareness, xii, xiii, 57–70, 197 of actions, 63–64 becoming self-aware, 21 and body language, 58–60 of consequences of actions, 63–65 fear and, 28–29 importance of, 68–69 for influence, 73 journey of, 60–66 lack of, 59, 63, 65, 66 of patterns of behavior or thought, 62 of reality, 65–66 of tendencies, 58, 60–62 in those worth following, 69–70 time needed to acquire, 188–189 of transformed leaders, 67–68 Self-honesty, 74 Self-improvement, life worth living and, 57 Self-leadership, xii, 72, 73, 76–78 See also Developing you as heart of leadership and influence, 196–197 support and challenge in, 37 Index Self-preservation, 27–31 abdication as, 49 power questions for, 27–29 Serving, moving to fighting from, 111–112 Sherpa, xii belief system of, ix challenge and support from, 36 experience and quality of, expertise of, 95–96 fears of, 27 focus of, 200 as leaders worth following, 70, 175–177, 204 liberation by, 54 mental strategies of, 176–177 as metaphor for leader, 20–21 and motivation of clients, 136 nobility of, 135 as 100X leaders, 19 others helped by, 32 physiology of, 96 self-leadership by, 76–77 and success of climb, 97 support and challenge from, 38 team atmosphere shaping by, 155 233 training of clients by, 137 Sherpa challenge, 191–204 for becoming the best leader, 199–200 choosing your guides, 198–199 plotting your course, 196–198 readiness to climb, 195– 196 and rewards of 100X life, 201–202 Skills: intentional transfer of, see Multiplication for training, 141–142 Social media, xi, 72 Socrates, 57 Speaking truth in love, 98, 141 Standards, in organizational culture, 156 Stone, Lee Anne, 138 Stone, Renzi, 138–139 Subcultures: health of, 83 managing, 169–171 and organizational change, 166–169 Success: creating, 41 cultural factors for, 173 234 Index Support and challenge, 35–55 calibrating, 21, 37–39, 97, 122 consistency of, 122 by dominating leaders, 88, 89 establishing support before challenge, 39–41 in fighting for others’ highest good, 109, 111 integrated into circles of influence, 184 and intent of leaders, 54 in journey to liberating leadership, 86–91 meanings of, 38 moving toward liberating leadership, 52–54 as performance factor, 132 by protecting leaders, 90 for subcultures, 170–171 Support-Challenge Matrix of, 41–54 Support-Challenge Matrix, 41–54 abdicating quadrant in, 42, 49–50 in being a liberator, 185–186 dominating quadrant in, 42–46 and Five Circles of Influence, 84–85 liberating quadrant in, 42, 50–52 protecting quadrant in, 42, 46–48 quadrants of, 42 and subcultures, 166–168 testing leaders against, 52–54 Symbols, in organizational culture, 156 Tact, 59 “Taking out,” for transformation, 107 Teachableness, 21 Team: asking for leadership guidance from, 64 culture of, 156 defined, 81 expectations of, 129 inhibitions in leadership inside, 26–27 leadership of, 73, 81–82 Tendency(-ies): choosing to change, 66–67 default, 62, 72 in families, 80 in liberating others, 98 reality resulting from, 65 Index self-awareness of, 58, 60–62 of support and challenge, 38–39 See also SupportChallenge Matrix in team leadership, 81 toward domination, 88–89 working through, 188–189 Thought(s): about yourself, 77 patterns of, 62 positive vs negative, 76–77 Three Power Questions for Self-Preservation, 27, 28 Thucydides, 22 Time: common language regarding, 158 to keep others from pit of despair, 121 Tone, 59 Toxic cultures, 163–166 Training, multiplication by, 141–142 Transformation, xi–xii See also specific topics into being someone worth following, 188 as prerequisite for multiplication, 17 questions leading to, 14 secret to, 106–108 235 and self-awareness, 67–68 Transplanting people among cultures, 171–172 Trust: and consistency, 75 in credibility, 178–182 establishing, 39 and integrity, 182–183 and lack of self-awareness, 66 with liberating leaders, 51 Truth, spoken in love, 98, 141 Tuason, Danielle Tolentino, 110 Tulley, Paula, 82 Turcanu, Adriana, 111 Turnover, company culture and, 165 Unconscious competence, 115–117 Unconscious incompetence, 63, 64, 70, 115–118 Underwood, Ryan, 22–23 Unexamined leaders, 58 Unrealistic expectations, 39–41, 124 Values: culture shaped by, 159 focus on vision vs., 165 framework of, 156 236 Victim mentality, 25 Vision: culture shaped by, 159 focus on values vs., 165 to keep others from pit of despair, 121 staying focused on, 197 Index Vocabulary, in organizational culture, 156–158 “Want to,” “have to” vs., x Weak leaders, working for, x Weaver, Kevin, 61 Wisdom, intentional transfer of, see Multiplication WILEY END USER LICENSE AGREEMENT Go to www.wiley.com/go/eula to access Wiley’s ebook EULA ... The1 00X Leader 100X Leader The HOW TO BECOME SOMEONE WORTH FOLLOWING Jeremie Kubicek & Steve Cockram Cover image: Henry Be on... you to know more about leadership, we want you to become a leader who others are proud to follow Here is how one leader described the book while reading an early version: This book puts it all together... intentional living, to help you be the best leader in all the spheres of influence in your life And, we want you in turn to learn how to become a Sherpa for others We aim to get you to a place of 100%