The master coach leading with character, building connections, and engaging in extraordinary conversations

Advance Praise for The Master Coach “I have had the great honor of coaching hundreds of executives and managers over the past three decades; I’ve graduated from four different coaching programs and have read every coaching book I could get my hands on This book is different Gregg does a superb job, not only of describing the practices of THE MASTER COACH but also of presenting a compelling case that those who want to really have an impact in their coaching need to bring their entire selves into the coaching relationship and the coaching conversation This is the best book on coaching that I have read in a long time It is a must-read for all leaders and non-leaders who aspire to help others make significant changes in their work, careers and, yes their lives.” Bob Johnson Founder, LeaderSearch Executive Coaching Group “THE MASTER COACH will cause you to PAUSE and REFLECT It will test your courage through penetrating self-discovery questions that guide you to examine your character and how others see, trust, and connect with you It will challenge you to coach and lead at a much deeper level, leveraging intense, attitude-changing conversations It is a coaching model that is essential in helping others realize their full potential.” Trish Wetzel VP, Commercial Operations, Celgene Corporation “I remember that Gregg wrote an article a few years back called ‘Earning the Right to Coach.’ That article helped me to become more clear about what I as a coach and what I needed to better And he’s been my coach along this journey for the past twenty-five years or so Gregg writes, ‘If I’ve done my job, you’ll feel both challenged and appreciated, encouraged and provoked.’ He does all of this and more in this book He offers, ‘If you want to be of significant service to others, become a better coach.’ That’s absolutely true As you read it keep one hand open wide—see if you can catch the beautiful gems in this book for yourself.” Dede Henley CEO, The Henley Leadership Group Author of The Secret of Sovereignty “I have spent the last few years coaching and teaching thousands of organizational leaders how to be more coach-like in their conversations Leaders who are most effective at coaching realize coaching requires their full presence, character, and attention in every conversation Many of the coaching books I have read focus on prescribed checklists, but Gregg Thompson’s THE MASTER COACH provides insights into the true mastery of coaching Using insightful stories and compelling yet simple concepts, this book is my new top reading recommendation for my clients Reading this book has renewed my belief in the power of coaching to improve performance, create positive work environments and build bonds of trust between leaders and their colleagues But more importantly, its insights compel me to believe that coach-like skills not stop at the door of the organization Taking a coach-like approach in all our conversations creates possibilities of better relationships with communities, families and, dare I say, with yourself.” Jim Boneau Principle Leadership Coach & Master Facilitator The Rumble Group “Deceptively simple and refreshingly easy to read, THE MASTER COACH is packed with wisdom I have put this book at the top of the book list for my internal coaches at every level.” Joanne Vranos Head of Human Resources, GasLog Ltd “In THE MASTER COACH, Gregg shares the reasons, roles, responsibilities, and results of being a coach After exploring the vital areas of building trust, values, and communication that are succinctly presented in this very readable book, you will be well-equipped to make a significant difference in the lives of others and you will have the tools to it.” Garry Ridge President & CEO, WD-40 Company Coauthor of Helping People Win at Work “Effective coaching is a critical competency of organizational leadership that promotes creativity, elevates performance and resilience, and fosters professional development These attributes are essential to provide any organization with the competitive advantage it needs to succeed in an environment of continuous change THE MASTER COACH is an inspiring and brilliantly written guide for success that helps leaders understand the importance of leading with character, building connections, and engaging in extraordinary conversations THE MASTER COACH should be considered a must-read for every physician leader and healthcare executive who wants to make a real difference.” James R Hebl Regional Vice-President, Mayo Clinic Health System “THE MASTER COACH explores authenticity, vulnerability, generosity, integrity, and courage—the hallmarks of great coaches who seek to elevate these same characteristics in those we are privileged to work with An essential read for anyone looking to bring their highest and best selves to the coaching craft.” Terry Hogan Global Head of Diversity and Director, Talent Management Co-author of What is Global Leadership? Head of Human Resources, GasLog Ltd “I have many good books in my library, but only a small number of truly great ones that I return to time and time again for practical wisdom THE MASTER COACH has been added to that collection I have personal experience with Gregg’s Character, Connection, and Conversations; this book is simply and extension of who he is Studied with the proper motivation, it will not only change what you as a leader it has the potential to transform the ways that you think and interact with those around you Its goal is to help you build a culture where leaders at all levels are more thoughtful, capable, and effective as they direct, advise, teach, mentor and coach others If you want to take your current skills and organization to the next level, this book offers a great ROI.” Tom Steipp Former CEO, Symmetricom, Liquidmetal Technologies “Having had the opportunity to lead and serve patients as a general thoracic surgeon, colleagues as the CEO of the Mayo Clinic Arizona, and now students as the Director of the School for the Science of Health Care Delivery at ASU, I truly believe in the importance of servant leadership in achieving great results The essence of this model is the ability to coach your team members to grow and attain their most ambitious goals In my experience, Gregg Thompson exemplifies a “master coach” and has the great ability to teach others through word and action to be the best coaches they can be Improved leadership by understanding the importance of coaching leads ultimately to improved patient care I highly recommend THE MASTER COACH as a critical read for all leaders in health care.” Dr Victor Trastek Former CEO, Mayo Clinic Arizona Director, School for the Science of Health Care Delivery, ASU “In a refreshing, direct, and very personal voice, Gregg Thompson offers deep insights and learning about the long but very rewarding path to becoming a master coach With its structured and clear approach, THE MASTER COACH served me extremely well in fine tuning my coaching perspective, both as a professional coach and as a leader in the corporate environment The book is a joy to read and provides profound inspiration!” Peter Rauber Senior Director of Engineering Qualcomm Copyright © 2017 by Gregg Thompson All rights reserved Published in the United States of America No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage or retrieval system, without the permission in writing from the publisher This edition published by SelectBooks, Inc For information address SelectBooks, Inc., New York, New York First Edition ISBN 978-1-59079-420-3 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Thompson, Gregg, 1950- author Title: The master coach: leading with character, building connections, and engaging in extraordinary conversations / Gregg Thompson Description: First Edition | New York: SelectBooks, 2017 | Series: Bluepoint leadership series | Includes index Identifiers: LCCN 2016053164 Subjects: LCSH: Employees Coaching of | Executive ability Classification: LCC HF5549.5.C53 T4598 2017 | DDC 658.3/124 dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2016053164 Book design by Janice Benight 10 This book is dedicated to three precious souls— Jordyn, Elliott, and Violet— who have taught me the power of innocence, serendipity, and patience in coaching Contents Foreword by Bob Cancalosi Preface Acknowledgments Introduction by Marshall Goldsmith Part I: FOUNDATIONS OF COACHING On Becoming a Master Coach The Coaching Perspective Coaching is Everyone’s Business How People Learn, Grow, and Change Morality and Ethics in Coaching Part II: THE MASTER COACH MODEL CHARACTER: Earning the Right to Coach Authenticity Self-Esteem Noble Intention Emotional Intelligence CONNECTION: Creating Partnerships for Inquiry, Learning, and Change 10 Appreciation 11 Great Expectations 12 Accountability 13 All You Need Is Love CONVERSATION: Engaging in Dialogue that Generates Possibilities and Pathways 14 Coaching In the Now 15 The Conversation and the Story 16 The Flow 17 The Three Coaching Power Tools 18 Constructive Confrontation 19 Walk Away Empty Appendix Getting the Most out of Leadership Coaching: A Guide for the Talent Notes About Bluepoint Leadership Development Index About the Author Core personal values Core principles, affirmation Core values, betrayal Corporate cultures, contrasts Corporate hierarchy level Corrective feedback Counseling, discipline Counselor, role Courage development process impact interpersonal courage, presence practicing Creating the Good Life (O’Toole) Creation (coaching phase) Creative emotions, life springs Credo Critical path coaching Crossland, Ron Csikszentmihalyi, Mihaly Cultural conditioning Culture defining, problems diversity, respect cummings, e.e Curiosity, importance D Da Vinci, Leonardo Decision-making processes, information (addition) Deep listening, usage Defensive strategies, creation Deficit-thinking, practicing de Montaigne, Michel Demotion, earning Despair Development principles Dialogue engagement, possibilities/pathways Dillard, Annie Directness, habit (development) Discovery (coaching phase) Dissonance Distraction, manifestations Dual processing capacity E Eagleman, David Ego self-esteem, contrast state Emerson, Ralph Waldo Emotional competence, deficiencies Emotional future, mastery Emotional intelligence approach development, steps domains Emotional maturity Emotions embracing impact importance negative emotions, handling primordial emotions, experience Empathy development emotional intelligence domain importance practice Employee engagement Encounters, courage Energy management redesign waste, cessation Engagement, adult learning Erickson, Erik Esteem needs Ethics Exceptional people, qualities Existence, interdependence/interconnection Expectations performance, connection Experimentation, adult learning External conversations, internal conversations (contrast) External professional coaches, domain Extrasensory perception (ESP) F Faith, impact Fear, impact Feedback corrective feedback impact positive feedback process provision sources, search usage Feelings, range Feeling-thinking-acting patterns Feltman, Charles Feynman, Richard Fierce Conversations (Scott) Flow Frankl, Victor Freud, Sigmund Fundamental Attribution Error Future crafting excitement G Generosity, spirit Gladwell, Malcolm Glasser, William Goal-oriented adult learning process Goals envisioning setting Goleman, Daniel Grand vision, achievement Greene, Robert Greenleaf, Robert Growing edge Growing process Growth, opportunities Gut feeling H Habits addition elimination Hamel, Gary Happiness pursuit selection Hard sciences Heifetz, Ronald Abadian Heraclites Hicks, Donald L High performers, status Honesty, level (determination) Human beings, bias Human Capital Institute (HCI), organizational survey Humanity multiplicity sense Human resources Humility power self-confidence, combination Hunch I Ideas, brainstorming Immunity to Change (Kegan/Lahey) Impossibilities, defiance Inner strength, source Inner voice, impact Inner world, creation Inquiry appreciation, usage incisiveness partnerships, creation Integrity markers quest, paradox self-righteousness, contrast values, action Intelligence, emotional intelligence Intentions, nobility Internal coaching culture, creation/benefits Internal conversations, external conversations (contrast) Internal conversation, value/relevance (doubt) International Coaching Federation (ICF), study Interpersonal courage, presence Interpersonal effectiveness, improvement Interpersonal process Intimacy, term (usage) Intuition access usage J James, Muriel James, William Johnson, Bob Jongeward, Dorothy Judgment formation inaccuracy suspension Jung, Carl K Kahneman, Daniel Kaufman, Scott Kegan, Bob Kettering, Charles F Kiel, Fred King, Jr., Martin Luther Knowledge absence power Knowles, Malcolm Koestler, Arthur Kouzes, Jim KRW International study L Lahey, Lisa Language, usage Leader as Coach Workshop Leader Coaches assistance goal opportunity presence role Leaders excitement, renewal opportunity steps trustworthiness Leadership business development workshops, usage emotions, importance passion power, increase qualities Leadership coaching coaches, usage directness/candidness, habit (development) exploitation feedback, sources (search) forward motion future, crafting learning, reflection/generalization outcomes, focus performance breakthroughs, celebration problems, anticipation process, driving session, preparation trivia, ignoring Learners, life-long role Learning adult learning process applied learning lifelong learning models partnerships, creation principles process reflection/generalization Left brain Legacy, envisioning Lie coaches, advertisement Life coaching competing aspects, integration de-junking envisioning experience gift meaning passion philosophy Life-long learners, impact Lightfoot, Joseph Barber Linsky, Martin Listening, deep listening Long-term coaching relationship, building process Love impact truth/confrontation, association Low performers, status M Management hierarchies, reinvention Manager, challenge Maslow, Abraham Master coach awareness becoming character self-assessment emotional maturity genuineness questions self-mastery Talent, comparison Mayer, John Meditation Meininger, Jut Mental energy, loss Mental habits, formation Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), knowledge Mind See Brain/mind Mindfulness, coaching (relationship) Mipham, Sakyong Molinaro, Michael Moore, Thomas Motivation (emotional intelligence domain) Motives, subordination Mutual inquiry/discovery, process N Needs esteem needs hierarchy self-actualization/self-transcendence needs Negative emotions, handling Neo-cortex, amygdala (relationship) Neuroplasticity Neuroscience, usage Noble intentions requirement Non-directive therapy Nonverbal communication O Oak School Experiment Obstacles, removal Offensive strategies, creation Opposites, creative synthesis Optimism impact origins selection Optimistic bias, impact Optimistic coach, impact Organizational needs Organizations change culture, creation members, coaching restructuring skills/perspectives O’Toole, James Outcome focus ownership, coaching mistake P Paraphrasing, provocativeness Parent ego state Partnerships creation formation Pathways Patton, George Peer-to-peer partnership People actions diversity, respect focus hiring, success qualities selection Performance breakthroughs, celebration development plans, challenge expectations, connection improvement monitoring standards, increase Personality traits, assumptions Personal life, improvement Personal perspectives Personal war stories Perspective development emphasis Pessimism, impact Peterson, Joan Philosophy of Life Plug-and-play solutions Positional power, reduction Positive feedback Posner, Barry Potential attainment realization Powell, John Joseph Power, source Power tools big questions coaching pathways conversation interventions Practice, adult learning Practice of Adaptive Leadership, The (Heifetz/Linksy) Practices, elimination Pragmatism Presence gift tuning out/in Prevailing Personal Story Productivity, concerns Pseudo-mutuality, basis Pygmalion, myth Q Question asking, reasons power R Rationality, emphasis Ready position Reflective silence, usage Re-framing, usage Regret, mental energy loss Relationships life aspect Relativism, assertions Reputation, construction/ruin Response flexibility Right brain Rogers, Carl Role-specific skill set Roosevelt, Eleanor Rosenthal, Robert (Rosenthal effect) Ross, Lee D Rothfuss, Patrick Russell, Bertrand S Salovey, Peter Scenario exploration Schmidt, Eric Scott, Susan Self-acceptance absence Self-accountability Self-actualization needs Self-appreciation Self-awareness emotional intelligence domain foundation, building power Self-confidence, humility (combination) Self-control, loss Self-directed adult learning Self-discovery, portals Self-doubt reduction Self-esteem absence building/beauty ego, contrast enhancement high level progress source Self-examination Self-expression Self-Fulfilling Prophecy (Tauber) Self-knowledge Self-management, impact Self-mastery, impact Self-process Self-protection Self-reflection Self-regulation, emotional intelligence domain Self-reliance creation Self Reliance (Emerson) Self-righteousness, integrity (contrast) Self-selling, stopping Self, sense (health) Self-transcendence needs Self-transformation Self-worth, foundation (creation) Seligman, Martin E Senior leaders, domain Shapiro, Dan Shaw, George Bernard Shepard, Herb Siegel, Daniel J Silence, power Sixth sense Skillsets, formation Sounding boards Srivastva, Suresh Steinem, Gloria Stockton, Nick Story blame story conversation, relationship personal story Stranger, coaching Strengths, view (enlargement) Student-coaches, impact Surface-level external conversation Sympathy, description T Tagore, Rabindranath Talent accountability connection, relationship guide learning, deepening long-term interests Master coach, comparison path potential requirement, minimum talent-centered coaching talent-generated goals term, usage/coinage usage work in progress Talking, excess (coaching mistake) Tauber, Robert Teacher, role Team, coaching perspective Therapy client-centered therapy discipline non-directive therapy Thermodynamics, third law Thinking, shift Thomas, Dylan Time investment, redesign management money, relationship waste, cessation Tolle, Eckhart Traits, perception Transactional analysis Transparency Triangulation Trust currency defining fragility Truth absoluteness love/confrontation, association power telling difficulty Tuning out/in Twain, Mark 12 Coaching Pathways, The U Unconditional regard V Values acceptance, problems action addition behavior/energy, alignment coaching core personal values core values, betrayal doubt neutrality orientation statement value judgment Van Gogh, Vincent Verbal communication Victory, recognition/celebration Vision, impact Visualization, inspiration Vulnerability, discomfort/danger W Well-being, passion Wetzel, Patricia Work competing aspects, integration passion Working, excess (coaching mistake) Work in progress Workplace, re-envisioning Z Zander, Benjamin About the Author Photograph by Brian Gottmers Gregg Thompson is President of Bluepoint Leadership Development, recognized as one of the finest providers of coach-training programs in the world Having coached many of the most senior leaders in Fortune 100 companies and trained thousands of coaches worldwide, Gregg is uniquely qualified to write the definitive book on what it takes to be a Master Coach An in-demand speaker and facilitator, he has a broad-reaching background in leadership development, specifically in helping leaders develop their coaching skills He has designed several award-winning leadership development workshops including The Coaching Essentials, Leader as Coach, Advanced Coaching Skills, and Powerful Coaching Conversations Gregg is the author of the popular book, Unleashed! (Select-Books, 2006) His deep corporate and consulting experience includes having held several senior executive roles in large commercial organizations, and his consulting, coaching, and training work has taken him to more than in forty-five countries Gregg is a graduate of the British Columbia Institute of Technology (engineering technologist) and Pepperdine University (master of science in organization development) He writes several articles on coaching each year for industry publications, delivers multiple webinars and keynote speeches, and designs and facilitates custom coaching workshops He is particularly well known for leading large group, highly interactive keynote coaching workshops for corporate meetings and conferences that provide participants with immediately usable coaching skills and approaches Gregg can be reached at greggthompson@bluepointleadership.com ... change THE MASTER COACH is an inspiring and brilliantly written guide for success that helps leaders understand the importance of leading with character, building connections, and engaging in extraordinary. .. FOUNDATIONS OF COACHING On Becoming a Master Coach The Coaching Perspective Coaching is Everyone’s Business How People Learn, Grow, and Change Morality and Ethics in Coaching Part II: THE MASTER COACH. .. have an impact in their coaching need to bring their entire selves into the coaching relationship and the coaching conversation This is the best book on coaching that I have read in a long time