School Phobia, Panic Attacks and Anxiety in Children - part 10 docx

020 8394 8300 National helpline: 08457 909090 www.samaritans.org.uk24-hour help to people who feel suicidal or desperate for any reason Special Educational Needs British Dyslexia Associa

Commission for Racial Equality

Eating Disorders Association

103 Prince of Wales Road

Norwich NR1 1DW

Adult helpline: 0845 634 1414 Youthline: 0845 634 7650 www.edauk.com

Information and support for sufferers of anorexia, bulimia and other eating disorders, and their families

Education Otherwise

PO Box 7420

London N9 9SG

0870 730 0074 (recorded details of contacts) www.education-otherwise.org

Support, advice and information to families practising or contemplating home-based education as an alternative to school

School House Home Education Association

Mental Health and Counselling

Helps sufferers of anxiety-related problems

British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy

Lists counsellors all over the UK, and gives information and advice

The British Psychological Society

Offers help and counselling to anyone who has suffered bereavement

246 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

ERIC (Enuresis Resource and Information Centre)

34 Old School House

National Phobics Society

Zion Community Resource Centre

National organisation for people with obsessive compulsive disorder

Royal College of Psychiatrists

020 8394 8300 National helpline: 08457 909090 www.samaritans.org.uk

24-hour help to people who feel suicidal or desperate for any reason

Special Educational Needs

British Dyslexia Association

Gives information and advice concerning special educational needs

248 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

National Association for Special Educational Needs (NASEN)

For children and adults with autism and Asperger syndrome

Mencap National Centre

73, 145, 210American Academy of Child andAdolescent Psychiatry 62, 114,218

American Psychological Association62

American Hearing Association 161amitriptyline 213

Speech-Language-Anafranil 213anger 52, 54, 67, 68, 136

Animal Hospital 109

Anti-Bullying Campaign 242anti-bullying policy 107anti-depressants 212–14 selectiveserotonin reuptake inhibitors(SSRIs) 213

tricyclic 213anti-social behaviour 14, 68, 72anti-social personality disorder 73anxiety 9–11, 14–17, 20, 23, 24, 30,

34, 39–64, 73, 74, 76, 79, 80,86–9, 95, 97, 108, 110, 113,115–18, 123, 125–9, 139, 143–9,

151, 158, 160, 164–6, 170–3,

179, 180, 182, 183, 186–224,226–9, 231–4, 238–40, 247anxious child 40–1

dealing with 56–60disorders 39–64drug treatments for 212–14generalised 49–50

therapy for 189–211free-floating 48

positively dealing with child’s164–85

don’t be part of problem164–7

250

positive things to do to help

anxious child 167–82

seeking professional help 187–9

understanding how it works 196

when child is severely affected by

186–220

see also separation anxiety; social

anxiety

Anxiety Care 7, 246

‘Anxious Child, The’ (poem) 236–7

Anxiety Disorders Association of

and refusing school 25–7

problems with imagination and

and social phobia 117–18

special schools for 20

Assertiveness Skills for Young Adults

(Csóti) 155assess how much attention child needs221–2

assessment for SEN 23attention

assess how much child needs221–2

seeking 23, 31attention deficit (hyperactivity)

disorder see AD(H)D

Australia 73, 74autism, high-functioning 25, 26, 47,63

Autism Society of America 38, 63

autistic spectrum disorder see ASD

baby, threatened by arrival of new 18,

31, 109Bach flower remedy: rescue cream238

stories 169bedwetting (enuresis) 55–6, 74behaviour, understandingunacceptable 91behavioural inhibition, persistent46–7

behavioural therapy 199–202positive behaviour changes:conditioning 199–201

positive behaviour changes:

neither child nor parents should be

blamed for her problems 165–6

British Dyslexia Association 249

British Psychological Society 247

who are the bullies? 67

why bullies need help 72why children become victims of68–9

why children bully 67–8why does being bullied inducepoor health? 75

why it is important to stop bullies71–2

Bullying Online 242burns, severe 52calmness 20CAMHS (Child and AdolescentMental Health Service) 48, 52, 187car crashes 52

caretakers, understanding role of 95cassettes/CDs, play relaxing 169–70CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy)189–91, 193

CFIDS (chronic fatigue immunitydeficiency syndrome) 27CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) 11,24–5

how do I know if the child hasCFS? 28–9

and refusing school 27–9challenges, give child as soon as she isready 222–3

school trips 223changes in routine 57charts for child 175–6

My Chart to Show the Things IEnjoy 185

My Feelings 184chest pains 44child abuse 72, 109, 113trauma from 18, 47, 68Child and Adolescent Mental Health

Service see CAMHS

child and adolescent psychiatrist 187,188

child psychologists 20, 187

252 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

chronic fatigue syndrome see CFS

chronic fatigue immunity deficiency

syndrome see CFIDS

example of using, to facilitate

positive change in child 207

and helping child to be able to

explain her needs 97–8

conduct disorders 73confide problems to people parentstrust 180–1

constipation 178–9Contact a Family 249

Contentious Issues: Discussion Stories for Young People (Csóti) 81

control, feeling out of 45co-ordination problems 59coping difficulties 69counselling 72, 246–8counsellors 189crime 14, 72violent 52criminal behaviour 73crisis 39

crying 16, 30, 54, 80, 116Cruse Bereavement Care 247cyclones 52

death, thoughts of 55decision-making 58–9ability, poor 54

Deep Sleep 240

dehydration 179dentophobia 43dependence on parents, excessive 15

drama and role-play 156–7

dressing like peer group 78–9

emails, sending nasty 66emetophobia 43emotional numbness 53emotional problems 15, 55empathy 211

enjoyment, lack of 54enuresis (bedwetting) 55–6ERIC (Enuresis Resource andInformation Centre) 247errands 60

erythrophobia 43ethnic origin 69exams and tests 107excel, wanting to 50excluded from group of friends,suggestions to help child 78–9exercise 60

exhaustion 28explain things to anxious child 167extortion 76

eye contact, difficulties with 25facial expressions, difficultiesunderstanding/using 25faint, feeling 16, 28, 30, 40, 44fainting 17

help from extended 174

254 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

problems, such as illness 112

protect child from extended

help child to play using 177

learn to laugh at absurdity of

233–4

new, should not be introduced

because of parental worries 165

see also social phobia

feeling left out, gradually withdraw

support when child is 225

fight or flight response 39

fitting in with peer group 78–9

see also sports

gang wars 52gentle start to day 170gestures, difficultiesunderstanding/using 25getting up early 171gossip/rumours, spreading 66gradual desensitisation 204

Grey Squirrel 239–40

group

of friends, suggestions to helpchild excluded from 78–9situations/activities, problems with

26, 50work 90guilt 53hair pulling 50handwriting difficulties 27headaches 16, 28, 30, 54, 75, 179,213

headteacherspeak to 181understanding role of 95health 246

keep an eye on child’s 177–80heartbeat, rapid 17, 30, 40, 45herbal/complementary remedies238–9

Bach flower remedy: rescue cream238

sea bands 238–9

hikikomori 161

homeeducation 216–17fear of being left alone at 87fear of leaving 19, 52moving 55

problems at 18, 31

‘I Am What I Am’ (Gaynor) 155, 238

‘I Will Survive’ (Gaynor) 238

ICD-10 Classification of Mental and

Behavioural Disorders (WHO) 41, 52

interviewing, motivational 210–11intimidation 69, 81, 105

introversion 74IPSEA (Independent Panel for SpecialEducation Advice) 249

irritability 49, 54, 74Italia Conti Associate Schools 241Japan 160

jealousy 68jigsaw puzzle 203joining clubs 225–6

Keeper of Dreams 239

kidnapping 52Kidscape 243learningabout school culture andexpectations 90–2disabilities 11Leeds Family Therapy and ResearchCentre 219

Lego 100building complicated structure 203Lentizol 213

lethargy 54letting go: first steps in recovery221–6

assess how much attention needs221–2

dealing with trauma 226give child some challenges as soon

as she is ready 222–3gradually withdraw support223–6

Librium 214life events, stressful 47

256 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

life goes on regardless, show child

167–8

listening 95

helping child listen effectively 100

to what child wants at bedtime

170

literalness 26

loneliness 69, 73

dealing with 142–3

gradually withdraw support when

child is lonely and bored 224

lunchtime etiquette at school, coping

memory, poor short-term 28

Mencap National Centre 250

mental health and counselling 246–8

mental health service, child and

muscle tension 49relaxation techniques for 153musical instrument, practising 203

mutism see selective mutism 125–9

My Chart to Show the Things I Enjoy185

My Feelings Chart 184

myalgic encephalomyelitis see ME

nail biting 50name-calling 66National Association for SpecialEducational Needs (NASEN) 249National Association of VictimSupport Schemes 244National Autistic Society 38, 63, 79,

84, 90National Phobics Society 37, 61, 62,

162, 247nausea 17, 28, 30, 40, 45, 144, 152,238

needs, helping child to be able toexplain her 97–8

nefazodone 214negative thoughts 153–4changing 157–60nervous tics/habits 25, 50nervousness 74, 87New York University Child StudyCenter 161

nightmares 29, 53, 87, 172NSPCC (National Society for thePrevention of Cruelty to Children)244

numbness 45nurseries 89

Online Asperger syndrome

Information and Support 38, 63

why do they start? 46–7

dealing with see under anxiety

neither child nor parents should be

blamed for her problems 165–6

new fears should not be

introduced because of worries

of 165

over-protective 69

reassess rules parents expect child

to observe 174separation of 55should not be critical of child’sschool or teachers 167should not ignore unacceptablebehaviour 166

paroxetine 213party, gradually withdraw supportwhen child has been invited to224–5

peer suicide 52peer victimisation 73, 74

People Skills Bible (Csóti) 155 People Skills for Young Adults (Csóti)

155perfectionism 46, 50performance, concern with 50personality types 46

pet, bereavement over 109phobias 41–4, 46, 126, 145, 190,

191, 216, 233, 247

see also acrophobia; aerophobia;

agoraphobia; apiphobia;arachnophobia; claustrophobia;dentophobia; dysmorphobia;emetophobia; erythrophobia;ophiophobia; ornithophobia;school phobia; social phobia;trypanophobia

physical abuse 52physical affection, give child plenty of168

physical failure, feeling (in games etc.)

18, 121–2physical fitness, improving 155–6physical skills needed for startingschool 100–2

physical symptoms 21play using her fears, help child to 177police 70, 77

positive, being 95–6

258 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

positive behaviour changes

conditioning 199–201

modelling 201–2

positive social behaviour 81

positive things to do to help anxious

get child up early 171

give child plenty of physical

affection 168

give child reasons to look forward

to going to school 175

have gentle start to day 170

help child to play using her fears

177

help from extended family

members and friends 174

keep an eye on child’s health

177–80

keep to same routine 171

make bedtime special 168–70

make up charts for child 175–6

monitor child’s progress 182

praise child for small achievements

177

protect child from extended family

members and friends 173–4

reassess rules parents expect child

to observe 174

reassure child 167

reduce number of things child

needs to worry about 172

relieving child’s anxieties about

talk to her friends 174tell child how brave she is 168tell child she is loved 168treat child each school day 174–5try to keep out-of-school hours asnormal as possible 177positively dealing with child’s anxiety164–85

don’t be part of problem 164–7neither child nor parents should beblamed for her problems 165–6new fears should not be

introduced because of parentalworries 165

parents should not be critical ofchild’s school or teachers 167parents should not ignoreunacceptable behaviour 166when child is ill or has medicalcondition 164–5

post-traumatic stress disorder see

PTSDpostures, difficultiesunderstanding/using 25praising 32, 77, 99, 128, 131, 135,

201, 204, 222, 230child for small achievements 177preparatory work for school 92pre-school 92

primary school 34, 78starting, and separation anxiety89–102

be only positive 95–6communication skills neededfor starting school 96–7helping child to be able toexplain her needs 97–8

helping child listen effectively

100

improving child’s ability to talk

to people in authority

99–100

improving child’s speech 99

learning about school culture

and expectations 90–2

school timetable 93–5

Princess Diaries, The 232, 235

professional help, seeking 187–9

child and adolescent psychiatrist

progress, monitor child’s 1827

protect child from extended family

members and friends 173–4

reduce number of things child needs

to worry about 172referrals 186

reflective listening 211registration, school 104regression 53, 55what to do if child regresses227–35

has parent unwittinglycontributed to what’shappened? 231–2learn to laugh at absurdity ofsome fears 233–4

match action to child’s age230–1

show child she is not alone232–3

steps to follow 227–30rejection

fear of 27social 47, 69relationship problems 52, 73with opposite sex 43, 74peers and family members 53relaxation

cassettes and CDs 239–41play relaxing cassettes/CDs169–70

problems 50resources 239–41techniques 151–4, 202child’s breathing 151–3child’s muscle tension 153child’s thoughts 153–4Remeron 214

restlessness 49rethinking school 214–17home education 216–17rewards 100

260 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN

dinner money day 92

dos and don’ts 32–6

empathising with 29–36

how does it start? 17–20

identifying causes of symptoms

21–4

does child have friendship

problems? 22

does child like teacher? 22

has child done her homework?

21

is child attention seeking? 23

is child having difficulties with

work 23–4

is child overloaded with work?

23

is child tired? 21

is child trying it on? 23

is child using reluctance as

weapon? 23

is teacher causing problem? 22

is there anything differentabout the day? 22

is there problem in getting toschool? 22

what are physical symptoms?21

indicators of susceptibility inchildren 15–17

other reasons why children refuseschool 24–9

children with ASD 25–7children with CFS 27–9risks of untreated 19–20symptoms 16–17types of 14–15school(s)

absence fromthrough bullying/

victimisation 73through illness 18, 31, 108assembly 93

bell 91, 93, 94–5, 107break time 93

bus 15, 17, 22, 42, 49programme to get my daughter

on 205–6changing 18, 55, 108culture and expectations, learningabout 90–2

difficulties 190dinner(s) 90money 92, 104give child reasons to look forward

to going to 175milk 94

parents evening 107parents should not be critical of167

physical skills needed for starting100–2

psychologist 187

using behaviour to increase 203–4

self-expression, difficulties with 25

and bereavement, of person orpet 109

and feeling threatened byarrival of new baby 110and moving to new area 108

of parents 55and panic disorder 49and problems at homeillness 112

marital rows, separation anddivorce 112–13

violence and abuse 113reducing risks of childdeveloping 88–113risk of untreated 88signs of 86–8and starting school for firsttime (primary) 89–102and starting school for firsttime (secondary) 102–7and trauma 110–12

Serenity 239

Seroxat 213sertraline 213Serzone 214sexual abuse 52sexual harassment 81SFBT (solution focused brief therapy)209–10

shadowing parent 86shaking 17, 30, 45sharing toys, pencils etc 90shyness 20, 31, 67, 99–100, 190and social phobia 116–17dealing with, and making newfriends 139–42

example 141–2theories behind 117siblings, new 55

262 SCHOOL PHOBIA, PANIC ATTACKS AND ANXIETY IN CHILDREN