Chapter ft: Don't Go There: Words and Expressions to Avoid 323 Danger, Will Robinson Proverbs are often con- fused with clichés, but then again, I'm often confused with Cindy Crawford. Such is the way of the world. Unfortunately, I'm not Cindy, and proverbs aren't clichés. Proverbs are economical phrases that pack a great deal of meaning in a brief wallop; a cliché, on the other hand, is bloated and meaningless. Gorgeous George George Orwell was the pen name of Eric Blair, one of the most brilliant English stylists ever. In his landmark essay "Politics and the English Language," Orwell wrote, "Modern English prose consists less and less of words chosen for the sake of their meaning, and more and more of phrases tacked together like the sections of a prefabricated henhouse." He concluded: "The great enemy of clear language is insincerity. When there is a gap between one's real and one's declared aims, one turns as it were instinctively to long words and exhausted idioms, like a cuttlefish squirting out ink." You've read about Orwell before in this book. He deserves more ink, be- cause he nailed style in writing. But Orwell didn't just complain. Fortu- nately, he suggests a number of remedies. I've yet to come across six guidelines that make more sense than Orwell's. And here they are: 1. Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech that you are used to seeing in print. (In other words, cut all those clichés!) 2. Never use a long word where a short one will do. (Remember what you learned in Chapter 23 on word choice, or diction.) 3. If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out. (Look back to Chapter 22.) 4. Never use the passive voice when you can use the active. (This was covered in Chapter 22.) 5. Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent. 6. Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous. Take My Word for It Steer clear of slanted lan- guage, too. These are emotion- ally loaded words and phrases designed to inflame readers. Describing a lab experiment as "viciously maiming helpless rats" is an example of slanted lan- guage. At its most offensive, slanted language descends into propaganda; at its best, slanted language merely offends readers. 32*i Part S: Style: All the Write Stuff A Note on Words and Expressions to Avoid for Non-Native Speakers If you are a non-native speaker of English, this chapter is especially important to you for several reasons: • Many other countries are not as concerned with "politically correct" language as America has become recently. Thus, the issue of sexist and biased language is not as significant or likely to cause offense in your native language. • Ornate and flowery language may be considered more polite than direct dis- course in your native language. This is true in Japanese, for example. In general, direct, blunt speech is judged as very rude in Japanese culture. • Certain bodily functions may not be referred to with euphemisms in your culture. However, these functions are cloaked indirect expressions in English. Thus, knowing when to use euphemisms and when not to use euphemisms may pres- ent special problems for you. To deal with these issues, study the documents in your workplace and read well- respected newspapers such as The New York Times. Listen to the language used by public speakers and leaders who are held in high esteem. Do not rely on television, entertainers, or sports figures to help you master correct usage. The Least You Need to Know • Use bias-free language. • Avoid doublespeak, including jargon, bureaucratic language, inflated language, and euphemisms. • Nix on clichés, too. • Write simply and directly. Part In Your Write Mind Brenda Starr and Lois Lane can whip out a story in a flash, with nary a chipped nail. According to the movies and television, even L.A. lawyers, New York City cops, and lowly office workers sit at computer terminals and bang out perfectiy crafted memos, letters, or reports at breakneck speed. Hollywood would have us think that effective writing is a cakewalk— without the cake, of course. On the other hand, we have Hollywood's picture of the starving writer, toiling away in anonymity in a garret, painfully facing that blank sheet of paper while waiting for the muse. The floor is littered with a mountain of crumpled pages; towers of empty coffee cups teeter against the stained walls. Of course, both are equally unrealistic views of the writing process, yet each contains a germ of truth. In this part, you explore the process of writ- ing and learn how to produce powerful resumes, cover letters, business communications, and personal writing. Chapter Business Writing: Write Angles In This Chapter • Design effective business letters • Create winning resumes and cover letters • Send business thank you letters • Deliver good news and bad news in writing Today, there's stiff competition for positions, and people who can commu- nicate often win out over those who can't. Many companies don't advertise at all, preferring to do their recruiting through formal and informal net- working. The stock market is a wild roller coaster—and people are edgy. Knowing how to write a powerful resume and cover letter can help you get the job you want. If you've already got a job, these tools—along with the ability to write effective business letters and memos—can help you get where you want to be. Those are the skills you learn in this chapter. 328 Part 6: In Your Writ? Hind Letter Perfect Successful business writers know that an effective document reads well and looks good. Here are my top 10 ways to make your documents look as professional as they read: 1. Use white space (the empty space on a page) to separate and emphasize key points within a letter. Provide sufficient white space around paragraphs, too. Figure 1 inch to 1 Vi inches on all sides. 2. To help readers locate key elements, use indented lists, bullets, or numbers—just like this book does! 3. Use headers (words or phrases that group points) to lead the reader through the document. 4. To get maximum impact, put key elements such as return addresses and com- pany contact information in the top-left and lower-right quadrants of the page. 5. Go easy on the bells and whistles such as high- 0 1 «^ r\ J_ j- lighting, decorative devices, fonts, and color. A_J/ Quoth the Maven Templates (available on stan- dard software) can make format- ting business letters, resumes, and memos a breeze. 6. Decide whether to justify the right margin (line up the type), based on the situation and audience. Justified margins let you add about 20 percent more text on the page. However, use them only with proportional type to avoid distracting, wide spaces between words. 7. For all important business writing, such as letters of application and resumes, use good quality, heavy, white bond paper and matching envelopes. Tradition- ally, local printers typeset letterhead, but a good-quality laser printer and soft- ware package can create fine letterhead as well. 8. When possible, limit your letters and resumes to one page. 9. Consider your audience's needs and expectations. Show that you understand the purpose for the business communication and the context in which it is read. 10. Use conventional formats, explained in the following section and shown in Appendix A. Form and Function Business letters are single-spaced on 8V2 by 11-inch letterhead. There are three differ- ent formats you can use: the block style, the modified block style, and the semiblock Chapter 25: Business Writing: Write Angles 329 style. The differences among the three styles relate to paragraph indentations and the placement of headings and closings. • The block style has all parts of the letter placed flush left. • The modified block style places the head- ing in the upper-right corner and the closing and signature in the lower-right corner, parallel to the heading. The paragraphs are not indented. Danger, Will Robinson The semiblock style places the heading in the upper-right corner and the close and signature in the lower-right corner, parallel to the heading. The paragraphs are indented. Pick one letter style—the block style, the modified block style, or the semiblock style—and stick with it. You're less likely to make mistakes if you're consistent. The following list contains the guidelines for the block style. Vary it as explained ear- lier if you want to use the modified block or semiblock style instead. Date Inside address Salutation Body Close Signature Initials Enclosures Copies Month (spelled out), day (followed by a comma), year. The recipient's address; place two lines after the date. Recipient's title, last name, colon (Dear Ms. Streisand:). Short, single-spaced paragraphs stating the information. Capitalize the first word, conclude with a comma (Yours truly,). Place two lines after the last line of the letter. Sign your name in ink. Leave three lines of space after the close for your signature. If the letter is typed by someone other than the writer, insert the typist's initials below the typed name of the sig- natory. Capitalize the writer's initials; use lowercase for the typist's (LR:st or LR/st). "Enclosures" or "Enc." indicates that additional material is included with the letter. List other recipients alphabetically or by rank (cc: Samantha Harris, Tracey Jefferson). 330 Part 6: In Your Write Kissing Cousins Although no two kinds of business letters are identical, they do share certain features besides their format. • They are brief but clear. • The relationship between the writer and reader is established at the beginning of the letter. • Any necessary background information is provided. Danger, Will Robinson Using e-mail addresses like sonofsatan, hotlips69, and imababy will get you kicked out of the pile so fast you'll get whip- lash. Your e-mail should read: Firstname_Lastname@carrier, as in Laurie_Rozakis@Farmingdale.edu. If action is required on the part of the reader, the action is stated outright. If the letter is a response, it mentions the date of the previous contact. The tone matches the occasion. A letter to a col- league is appropriately friendly, but general busi- ness correspondence is formal. The overall tone is always polite. Business communication falls into the following general categories: letters of applica- tion, informational letters, and memos. Let's check out these categories. Resumes and Cover Letters: Get on the Fast Track You don't have to rescue a child from under a flaming Chevy or donate a kidney to get the job you want (although it probably wouldn't hurt). You do have to write effective resumes and cover letters—and writing is a lot less painful than heroics. A resume is a persuasive summary of your qualifications for employment. It is always accompanied by a cover letter. Employers use resumes and cover letters to decide whom to interview. An effective cover letter and resume are not like sweat pants: One size doesn't fit all. To get you some face time, a winning cover letter and resume must be tailored to suit the employer's needs and your qualifications as closely as possible. For that reason, many people have several different versions of their resume. Here's how to make your resume work for you. You Could Look It Up A resume is a persua- sive summary of your qualifications for employment. _ Chapter 25: Business Writing: Write Angles 331 Resumes As you write your resume, emphasize the things you've done that are most relevant to the position for which you are applying and show how you are superior to other can- didates. Emphasize what you can do for the company, not what the company can do for you. Be realistic, use the layout to emphasize key points, and relate your experience to the job you want. Here are the facts you must include: • Name, address, phone number, e-mail address • Education • Relevant experience Here are the facts you can include: • Career objective • Previous and current employment • Promotions • Foreign language and computer language proficiency • Volunteer positions • Education and course work • Honors and achievements • References Here are the facts you never include: • Age • Health (It's assumed that every candidate's health is excellent.) • Religious affiliation, political affiliation • Race or ethnicity • Gender or sexual orientation • Marital status (as in married, widowed, divorced, or single) • Information about children or pets 332 Part 6: In Your Write Mind You're expected to put your accomplishments in the best possible light, but always tell the truth. Background checks are a hot topic in personnel circles today. Experts say a decade of litigation has nervous employers turning more and more to professional background checkers, who report that caseloads are growing at 30 percent a year. Investigators find discrepancies or outright lies in about one-third of the resumes they check. Gloryoski! Shooting Yourself in the Foot Here are the top resume turnoffs. Resume No-No's Turnoff Example Poor formatting and exotic fonts Unnecessary personal information Buzzwords that obscure meaning Vague descriptions of achievements Incomplete contact information Spelling and grammar mistakes John J. JobSeeker, Àn^Àf^ax^t' I'm a single white male. I'm a Libra. As the Director of Integral Operations, my mission involves convergences in delivering synergized solutions to my strategic customers. "I increased widget sales." Instead, say "I increased widget sales by 25 percent or $2 million." Some people actually forget to give their own names and telephone numbers! The worst is misspelling the name of the company or contact person. Chronological Resume There are two kinds of resumes: chronological and skills. Although each type of resume lists basically the same information, the information is arranged very differently. A chronological resume summarizes your accomplishments in reverse chronological order (starting with the most recent and working backward). It stresses degrees, job titles, and dates. Consider using a chronological resume when • Your education and experience are logical preparation for the job you want. • You have an impressive education or job history. . the letter is typed by someone other than the writer, insert the typist's initials below the typed name of the sig- natory. Capitalize the writer's initials; use lowercase for the. places the heading in the upper-right corner and the close and signature in the lower-right corner, parallel to the heading. The paragraphs are indented. Pick one letter style the block. places the head- ing in the upper-right corner and the closing and signature in the lower-right corner, parallel to the heading. The paragraphs are not indented. Danger, Will Robinson The