A CROSS-CULTURAL STUDY OF CONCEPTION ABOUT LOVE, MARRIAGE BETWEEN THE VIETNAMESE AND AMERICANS

tài liệu tham khảo về bộ môn giao thoa văn hóa

A CROSS-CULTURAL STUDY OF CONCEPTION ABOUT LOVE, MARRIAGE BETWEEN THE VIETNAMESE AND AMERICANS

OUTLINE

Introduction

A Literature review

Vietnamese - American cross-cultural communication:

1.Theories of intercultural communication……… ……….1

1.1 What is culture ? 1

1.2 What is communication? 1

1.3Vietnamese vs American perceptions and communication styles….…2 1.3.1 Individualistic vs collectivistic cultures……… ……2

1.3.2High- vs low-context cultures……… …3

B Vietnamese and American outlook 1 Conception of love……….……… 3

1.1 Definition of love……… …3

1.2 Vietnamese‘s opinion……….……… 4

1.3 American’s opinion……… 5

2 Conception of marriage……… 6

2.1 Definition of love……….…6

2.2 Vietnamese’s opinion ……….6

2.3 American’s opinion……… …8

C Cross-cultural conception strategies……… … 9

Conclusion……… 10

References……… 11

Nowadays, cross-cultural takes many accounts of not only many researchers but also people all over the world Thanks to globalization, it has increased contact between all people from different cultures, but as a result, each cultural has conserve their own cultural Therefore, the misunderstanding and cultural conflict are still continues to survive in conception about love, marriage and happiness from diverse cultures such as Vietnamese and American The world today has a growing number of contacts resulting

in communication between people with different linguistic and cultural backgrounds The communication needs to be as constructive as possible, without misunderstandings and breakdowns

In this assigment, the aims are discussed in the issues of intercultural

communication in outlook on love, marriage between Vietnamese and American

Specially, the assignment will compare and contrast the two conception in order to find the misunderstanding and cultural conflicts Thus, people from the two cultural can easy

to know deeply about the other cultural

1 THEORIES OF INTERCULTURAL COMMUNICATION.

1.1 What is culture?

Culture: shared background (eg national, ethnic, religious) reflecting a common language and communication style, shared customs, beliefs, attitudes and values

Cultural refers to the informal and often hidden patterns of human interactions,

expressions and viewpoints that people in one culture share The hidden nature of

cultural has been compared to an iceberg, most of which is hidden under water! Like an iceberg, most of the influence of culture on an individual cannot be seen The hidden aspects of culture have significant effects on behavior and on interactions with others

1.2 What is communication?

The process of sharing meaning through verbal and non-verbal communication Communication between people from different cultures; communication which is influenced by cultural values, attitudes, and behavior; the influence of cultural on

people’s reactions and respond to each other

Communication between people of different cultural backgrounds involves much more than overcoming the language barrier Starting with the point that cross-cultural communication competence affects the performance of communication, I will examine how national culture affects one’s perceptions of cross-cultural communication

1.3 Vietnamese vs American communication perceptions and communication styles

The most distinctive characteristics of the American culture are: individualism, equality, competition, self-help concept, task orientation, informality, directness,

practicality, and materialism, which are often opposed to those of the Vietnamese

emphasizing collectivism, hierarchy, cooperation, interdependent, restraint, implicitly, and humility

1.3.1 Individualistic vs collectivistic cultures

The factors such as the physical environment, the history, religion, etc have given Vietnam a vertical, group oriented structure of society which is reflected as

“molecular” social structure This sociological reality requires that one be more indirect, diplomatic, non-confrontational, and cautious in communicating with others In

America, these same factors have led to a horizontal, individually-oriented culture, or atomic social structure Individualism ranks highest and is a significant factor in the life

of Americans Individualistic vs collectivistic perceptions underpin many of the

differences in values and communication between the Vietnamese and Americans The U.S counterpart may feel that the Vietnamese is being excessively diplomatic or

“flowery,” which is generally associated with insincerity in the United States In

contrast, the U.S person’s individualism may be perceived as being selfish or

egotistical

1.3.2 High- vs Low-Context Cultures

Communication in high-context Vietnamese culture is opposed to that in low-context U.S culture Vietnamese prefer indirect and implicit manner, in which the message is actually highly dependent on the context in contrast to direct and explicit communication preferred in America There are differences in request and refusal

strategies between the Vietnamese and the American For example, rather than refuse an invitation, a Vietnamese might say yes but then not come Americans, in contrast, use more direct requests and refusals While the Vietnamese refuse, however, they use more avoidance strategies and sometimes give insufficient answers Therefore, the

Vietnamese are viewed, in American eyes, with suspicion, as if they have something to hide or lack self-confidence However, to the Vietnamese, American directness may be perceived as being blunt to the point of rudeness, or lack of subtlety and sophistication

1 CONCEPTION OF LOVE.

1.1 Definition of love

Love is known as an emotion which can also be included a felling of warm attachment or deep affection such as family love, materialistic love and godly love, in this assignment, we discuss about a romantic love or love between a men and a woman According to Wikipedia, love is a word

which refers to a variety of different emotional

states, feelings or attitudes which range from those of simple personal pleasures or desires to those characterizing interpersonal affection and many forms of profound kindness, compassion, and benevolent concern for the good of others

And oxford dictionary, love is a strong felling of affection for some body that you are sexually attracted to

To sum up, the definition of love is almost the same all over the world But its expression and conception are different from country to country

1.2 Vietnamese’s opinion

For instant, in Vietnam, love is going along with marriage A true love is a love was allowed by parents and the couple will get married in the future, love is a serious relationship and the couple must have responsibilities with others In some countries, love is often accompanied by sex Until now, Vietnamese people‘s outlook on sex has not changed much yet, because it was influenced by Buddhist theology and Confucian philosophy In Vietnam, sex is considered as a taboo subject and having pre-marital sex

or co-habitation is unacceptable according to the social convention Therefore, couples

in Vietnam have been expected to have a platonic love before they officially get

married

Most Vietnamese parents prevent their children from having a boyfriend or girlfriend when they are in their late teens because they want their children to

concentrate on their study Has been deeply affected by Confucianism, introduced from

China during a thousand years of Chinese rule, the conception of love in Vietnam was changed but it is still an important relationship and take many attentions of the family and social

The urgent issue in Vietnam is co-habitation which young generation claim that they live in modern style like western country It is really a big misunderstanding In American, love is often comes along with romance, Ideas of romantic love suffuse their lives and guide their emotional experiences and behaviors These constructs of love guide public and private behavior, create judgments of values in relationships, and control rules of openness or closure in expression How love is understood or practiced, manipulated or restricted, as a social discourse informs a considerable part of our

culture

1.3 American’s opinion

For Americans, romantic love is a basic belief for marriage, happiness, and success but American individualism creates a conflict because “Americans believe in the self” The sharing required by the promise of love threatens the self Love, then, is a paradox as love is an expression of spontaneous inner freedom, a deeply personal, the immediate feelings There for, love in American is belong to individual felling, their family do not pay much attention in their child’s partner, people live in freedom and individual liberties And love is often accompanied by sex The couple will express their love by having sex and it is acceptable according to the social convention

2 CONCEPTION OF MARRIAGE.

2.1 Definition of marriage

According to Wikipedia, marriage (also called matrimony or wedlock) is a

socially or ritually recognized union or legal contract between spouses that establishes rights and obligations between them, between them and their children, and between them and their in-laws The definition of marriage varies according to different cultures, but it is principally an institution in which interpersonal relationships,

usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged In some cultures, marriage is

recommended or considered to be compulsory before pursuing any sexual activity When defined broadly, marriage is considered a cultural universal

In Oxford dictionary, marriage is a legal relationship between a husband and a wife

2.2 Vietnamese‘s opinion

Marriage has a vital role in Vietnamese culture and tradition In the past, most marriages were arranged by parents or extended family and children might only

sometimes be consulted The groom and bride may have only met on the day of the engagement

- Vietnamese families were patriarchal: the man always took the lead

- Divorce was legal but not common in Vietnamese society: a wife was expected

to live in an unhappy marriage and sacrifice her life for her children rather than divorce -Parental leadership in the family was considered a rule Children must obey their parents and a certain physical punishment was not considered an abuse

-Unmarried boys and girls are not free to date when and with whom they please selves Parental permission is not as important as in the past

As western influence increased in Vietnam, the Vietnamese culture and is shifting and changing

- The wife’s role in the family is changing More independent works outside the family, they are more equal to the husband and even though he takes the lead in the family

- Divorce is beginning to be accepted, but it is still rare

- Children are becoming more independent and allowed to speak out their own ideas in the family, they began take more of advisory role in the choice of their child’s mate

- Parents are beginning to listen to their children and talk to them when they make a mistake, rather than physically punishing them

- The relationship between unmarried girls and boys is more open, and healthy interaction needs to be encouraged

But Vietnamese’s cultural is still influenced by Buddhist theology and

Confucian philosophy, they believed that fate in marriage, as well as wealth and

position, were preordained, though choice could play some role in activating a positive

or negative fate Traditionally, children lived with their parents until marriage, then the couple moved to the husband's father's household The extended family arranged

marriage, but individuals were usually consulted on the choice of their mate The typical engagement lasted six months, with little contact between the bride and groom prior to the marriage Traditionally the marriage was at one of the couples' homes Men usually

married between 20 and 30 years, and women at 18 to 25 years Women kept their maiden names legally but used their husband's name formally

2.3American’s opinion

American is a developed country with strong notion of equality and liberty There for, they has a general trend towards ensuring equal rights within marriage for women and legally recognizing the marriages of interracial, interfaith, and even a same-gender couples These trends have been motivated by a desire to establish equality and uphold human rights

A marriage is often decided by the couple, individuals were usually consulted on the choice of their mate Their parents do not prevent of against their choice, they even get marriage and tell to their parent later Children can leave home when they are 18 years old or when they can live themselves In the family, the role of a husband and a wife are equal Women do not kept their family name but used their husband's family name formally

They do not pay much attention in fate marriage; they can easy to get divorced when they live in an unhappy marriage And divorced in marriage is not seem to be a serious problem Since the late twentieth century, major social changes in Western countries have led to changes in the demographics of marriage, with the age of first

marriage increasing, fewer people marrying, and many couples choosing to cohabit rather than marry

C) CROSS – CULTURAL CONCEPTION STRATEGIES

In order to overcome differences, people must understand how he or she is being perceived by counterparts from other cultures Then, one needs to use effective cross-cultural communication Poor cross-cross-cultural awareness may have many consequences, some serious others comical When bridging cultures both similar and foreign to your own, certain strategies are crucial to international success

1 Learn about other cultures Respect other peoples culture and religion; the favor is returned Forget your assumptions and stereotypes Try not to evaluate their behavior against the standards you would use in your own country, and empathize with the speaker

2 Temper your own When some foreigners want to say or discuss about bad point or good point in your cultural, you need to calm down and explain the gap between two nations

3 Ask questions: Questions show you are interested in the other's culture This interest and consideration helps build your relationship People generally are appreciative that you are trying to understand them

4 Look for individual differences: Overviews of cultures are meant to be g

Intercultural communication gap is inevitable between the two quite opposite cultures, Vietnam and the U.S.A Today, despite widespread global influences, it

appears that cultural values such as Confucianism, low-/high-context communication, and independent/interdependent selves still underlie and impact on Vietnamese and U.S communication These values have remained fairly constant for the communication traits Thus, even though global forces appear to be strong, so are traditions

The issues discussed in this paper are only a few of the components that can affect communication and be responsible for miscommunication or misinterpretation The examples of differences are also only among the common ones Cross-cultural skills are needed to help to understand cultural differences and to use them productively and creatively, not simply ignoring or overcoming the gap Careful observation, ongoing study of cultures, and open-mindedness will all help develop cross-cultural

understanding to effectively communicate across cultures