Being effective is learning to do 'that which produces the desired result'.
If you want to be extremely successful in business or very happy in life or achieve some
large goal, then being effective is consistently doing the things that will bring about the
results you are after.
Perhaps the best overall prescription for becoming effective is contained within Stephen
Covey's best-selling book The 7HabitsofHighlyEffective People.
Published by Simon & Schuster, this book provides a useful, sequential framework for
understanding much about the process of Personal Development. Covey does not claim to
have invented the 7 habits, but rather to have discovered them and to have found a simple
language for articulating them. In fact, he says that these basic principles of effectiveness
may be found in all world religions; and it can be noted that many highly successful people
seem to have naturally developed them.
Habit 1 - Be Proactive
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
It is perhaps a great compliment to Stephen Covey that today, the substance of this first
habit is deeply embedded into the management psyche. We are told, in business, that we
should be proactive; and broadly what is meant by that is to focus our efforts and attention
on the long-term and to think in terms of the long-term consequences of our actions.
Covey contrasts being proactive or having a proactive mentality with being reactive.
Reactive people, he says, are those who are resigned to the truth that whatever they do in
the present can have no effect on their circumstances. And interestingly, for reactive
people, it really is a truth, for whatever we believe in our heart affects our thoughts, words
and actions. If we really believe that we can do nothing about our unreasonable boss or the
daily events in our lives, then we simply do not make the effort.
Proactive people, on the other hand, simply will not accept that there is nothing that can be
done about the unreasonable boss or the events of daily life - they will point out that there
are always choices. It is by the decisions we make, our responses to people, events and
circumstances that proactive people can and do affect the future. We may have no control
over what life throws at us but we always have a choice about how we are to respond.
Now this notion that having a particular attitude of mind (which is really where this habit
begins) can make such a huge and positive difference to almost everything we experience in
life is foreign to those who have already internalised the opposite habit as a part of their
personalities. For some people, the glass is always half-empty and the feeling of melancholy
is a pleasant reminder that something is indeed missing. For such people, this habit
represents a bitter pill to swallow - but, says Covey, it is also completely liberating.
When we are finally prepared to accept full responsibility for the effects that are manifest in
our lives; when we have the strength of character to admit it when we make mistakes
(even big ones); when we are completely free to exercise the options available to us in
every situation; then it can be said that we have finally internalised this habit. The other six
of the habits require that we first work on our basic character by becoming proactive and
thereby transforming ourselves into men and women of integrity.
Habit 2 - Begin with the End in Mind
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
Many people in the west identify with the frustration of success. Being successful at their
chosen career and committed to its progress they come to realise that it does not, in the
final analysis, bring any sense of real satisfaction. The reason for this ultimate
dissatisfaction is that they did not begin with the end in mind. For many people, it is not
just that they did not begin with the end in mind; it goes a bit deeper - they did not ever
get around to defining the end itself and so they simply could not begin with the end in
mind. So what does all this mean? The end represents the purpose of your life. Until you
can say what that purpose is, with assurance, then you just cannot direct your life in the
manner that would bring you the greatest satisfaction.
There are no short-cuts here. To engage in this habit, you need to have a dream, define
your own vision and get into the practice of setting goals which will allow you to make
measurable progress toward the dream. If you practice a faith, then you will want to
consider how this affects your purpose in life; if you do not, you will still need to get
involved in deep self-examination to find out exactly what it is that will bring you fulfilment.
To help you with this, you may wish to obtain my E-Book The Deepest Desire of Your Heart;
available from this site. The book contains some excellent self-reflection exercises you can
use to focus your mind on what is most important to you in life.
Until you have defined your vision - the big dream to which you will be working - you will be
unable to move on to habit 3 which provides a basic framework for you to re-align your
efforts so that you will ultimately achieve your heart's desire.
Habit 3 - First Things First
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
Following the amazing popularity of his work on The 7HabitsofHighlyEffective People,
Stephen Covey published a second book that deals with the 7 Habits; and the title of that
book is also First Things First. Both the book and this habit deal with subject of managing
your time effectively.
Consider the simple 2 x 2 matrix shown below. It plots the concepts of urgency and
importance against each other; and represents where you are spending your time. To really
understand and apply this habit, you need to have first done habit 2 - that is, you should
already have defined what is important to you. Without first doing this, habit 3 has no
power because you simply cannot separate what is important from what is not important.
This representation shows four categories of demand which may be made on your time.
Quadrant 1 consists of activities which are both urgent and important - in other words,
things to which you absolutely must attend. Why must you do these things? Because they
are important - meaning that they contribute to your mission; and they are urgent -
meaning that they have some sort of deadline associated with them.
Choices about where to invest your time really are made in the other categories; and most
people - driven by the concept of urgency - get drawn into Quadrant 3; doing things that
consume their time but do not contribute to their goals. HighlyEffectivePeople (yes they all
fit together you see) understand that the high leverage activities are all Quadrant 2 -
important but not urgent. Planning, preparation, prevention, relationship-building, reading,
improving your professional knowledge and exercise are all examples of Quadrant 2 activity
- not an exhaustive list, by any means.
We all intuitively know that Quadrant 2 activities are the key to getting results; but you
need to have internalised the first two habits before you can benefit from the high leverage
this habit brings. In other words, you first need to have developed the strength of character
(proactivity) which allows you to be able to say no to demands on your time that fall into
Quadrants 2 and 3; and you also need to have defined what importance means for you -
otherwise the Quadrants do not exist.
Put habits 1,2 and 3 together and you have the ultimate success formula. Stated simply -
get your mind right; define what is important; then organise your life to maximise your
Quadrant 2 efforts. By spending appropriate time on Quadrant 2 activities, you will gain
control over the circumstances of your life; Quadrant 1 will actually get smaller because you
will have anticipated and prepared for much Quadrant 1 activity. Concentrating on Quadrant
2 is absolutely fundamental to achieving success. You might like to take a look at the 4tm
Spreadsheet, available from this site, which can help you to make this key adjustment in
the use of your time.
Habit 4 - Think Win Win
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
The next of the 7Habits is - Think Win-Win. This habit is again an attitude of mind. It
concerns fostering an attitude that is committed to always finding solutions that will truly
benefit both sides of a dispute. Solutions do not, of course, exist in themselves; they must
be created. And, even if we cannot see the solution to a particular problem, it does not
mean that no such solution exists. The win-win idea is not based upon compromise - that is
where most disputes naturally end. But compromise is the result of not properly perceiving
the possible synergy of the situation.
The more you practice this habit, the more committed you will become as you find solutions
which truly do benefit both parties, where originally it looked as if no such agreement might
be reached. Covey has amended the wording of this habit slightly in recent years to read:
Think Win-Win or No Deal. This attitude works well because it liberates the individuals
concerned from the effort of trying to persuade the opposite party to shift ground or
compromise. The effort is instead spend on trying to understand, which is where habit 5
comes in - you see, they are also sequential.
Habit 5 - Seek First to Understand
then be Understood
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
The fifth habit is - Seek First to Understand. What most people do, naturally, when involved
in some type of discussion, meeting or dialogue is exactly the reverse - they seek first to be
understood. And, as Stephen Covey says, when both parties are trying to be understood,
neither party is really listening; he calls such an interaction, 'the dialogue of the deaf'. This
habit is an important key to inter-personal relationships and it seems to be almost magical
in its ability to transform the course of discussions. Why? Because by making the
investment of time and effort required to understand the other party, the dynamics of the
interchange are subtly affected.
This habit is not just about letting the other person speak first; it concerns actually making
the effort to understand what is being said. It is about understanding that our natural habit
of mind is to misunderstand. When we are engaged in conversation, error is always present.
NLP tells us that we simply make our own meaning based on our own experiences and
understanding of life; and frequently we make the wrong meaning. You might like to take a
look at the answers given by school-children on history exams which illustrates this principle
- we are no different!
If however, we are prepared to invest the time and effort to really understand the other
person's position; and to get into the habit of spending the first part of the discussion doing
so; then, when it is felt by the other person that you do indeed understand, the dynamic
changes. People become more open, more teachable, more interested in what you may
have to say and with the mutual understanding that flows from this habit, you are ready to
practice habit 6; which concerns finding creative solutions.
Habit 6 - Synergize (Synergise)
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
The sixth of the habits is - Synergize. This habit involves you putting your head together
with the other party or parties in order to creatively brainstorm a synergistic solution to a
problem i.e. to find a solution which contains win-win benefits. It can only be done
successfully if you have first practiced habits 4 and 5. The well-known definition of synergy
is as follows:
Synergy - When the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.
Finding a synergistic solution means finding a solution which is better than either party
might first propose. Such a solution can only be found if both parties truly understand the
other parties position - the fruit ofhabits 4 and 5. There have been many books written on
successful brainstorming techniques; my own favourite techniques are those proposed by
Edward DeBono - professor of thinking and perhaps most famous for Lateral Thinking.
Putting habit 4, 5 and 6 together, you have a perfect model for human interaction. Put
simply: first be mentally committed to the idea that a solution that will benefit all parties
may be constructed; next invest the necessary time and effort to really understand the
other party and do that first; finally creatively brainstorm a synergistic solution - a natural
product of mutual understanding and respect.
Habit 7 - Sharpen the Saw
Be Proactive Begin With The End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win-Win Seek First To Understand Synergize Sharpen
The Saw The 8th Habit
The last habit of the 7Habits is - Sharpen the Saw. In this habit, you are the saw; and to
Sharpen the Saw is to become better, keener and more effective. HighlyEffectivePeople
always take time to Sharpen the Saw. What is meant by Sharpening the Saw is to regularly
engage in the exercise of the three dimensions which make up the human condition: body,
mind and spirit. Covey also adds a fourth dimension - the inter-personal.
Spiritual Exercise
Let us begin by considering Spiritual Exercise - this is the area which is perhaps the most
misunderstood. I believe that, in the west, we have become spiritually blind. The progress
of our science, education and technology has lead us to construct a view of the world and
the universe that excludes the agency of God. Freud famously said that it was man that
made God 'in the image of his father'. It is, of course, a very clever statement and not one I
wish to here challenge - whether this statement or the reverse is true is for you to decide.
However, as the west has, by and large, abandoned faith in the creator God, so it has
simultaneously abandoned the idea that life has any meaning or purpose; and it is purpose
and direction in life that this habit refers to as Spiritual Exercise. Of course, if you are a
religious person, then there will be a tie-up here with your personal faith; however, if you
are not religious, don't also abandon the idea that life holds a special purpose for you.
To exercise spiritually, I recommend that you consider engaging in some form of
meditation. Meditation involves regularly sitting in a relaxed position and thinking about
nothing for a period of about 10 or 15 minutes. Why this practice should bring about any
material benefits is an interesting question. You might consider that you relax your mind
quite enough when you sleep, but it turns out that we don't really relax our minds when we
sleep. The brain is active during sleep - during REM sleep, the brain appears to be
processing information. Though it is not yet known exactly what it is doing, the brain is
certainly not passive and so the mind is not relaxed during sleep. Meditation is the practice
of disciplining the mind, It is difficult to do at first, but if you stick with it, positive health
benefits will follow.
Making use of Jack Black's House on the Right Bank is an excellent tool for combining what
is really guided meditation with the practice of regularly reviewing your mission, your roles
and your goals; and that is what Stephen Covey means when he talks about spiritual
exercise - the regular, review and preview of the things that are most important to you in
life. These are the first things that you must define in habit 2 - Begin with the End in Mind.
Physical Exercise
Regular aerobic, physical exercise is essential for health, energy and a feeling of well-being.
Naturally, you should always consult your doctor or physician before you embark upon any
course of physical exercise; and it should be obvious that such professional advice as may
be given, should always be taken into account.
To practice this part of Habit 7 requires that you commit to at least three sessions of at
least twenty minutes per week. If you are not already engaged in this sort of exercise, you
will find that after a period of about six weeks, you will feel much better, much healthier
and indeed your body will become more efficient at processing oxygen - which is the key to
energy.
Mental Exercise
Ask yourself these questions. What am I doing to sharpen my mind? Am I engaged in a
programme of education or learning of some kind? What am I doing to improve my
professional knowledge?
How you should go about this part of the habit is, of course, for you to decide, but you
should ensure that you are reading regularly. What should you read? Naturally you want to
put in the good stuff - so it's not a case of reading for its own sake; it is reading carefully
selected material which allows you to broaden and deepen your understanding.
You will naturally be paying particular attention to the important areas you defined in habit
2, but you should also consider reading all the great works of literature and also ancient
wisdom literature which includes books like The Psalms and Proverbs
Interpersonal
This part is not really a discipline, as are the other three parts, it is really a
commitment; and for me, I make the commitment during the spiritual part of the habit,
that is, during a meditation. It is simply to commit to approaching inter-personal
relationships by making use ofhabits 4, 5 and 6.
Even if people approach me making use of language, actions, or behaviour which I
personally believe to be inappropriate, my commitment is to not react, but to use my
proactive capacity to engage in the exercise ofhabits 4, 5 and 6 which I believe will lead to
the best possible outcome in such circumstances
. popularity of his work on The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,
Stephen Covey published a second book that deals with the 7 Habits; and the title of that. contained within Stephen
Covey's best-selling book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
Published by Simon & Schuster, this book provides