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An american – vietnamese cross-cultural study on non-verbal expressions of disappointment

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PART A: INTRODUCTION

i Rationale

“One’s eyes are more accurate witnesses than ears”

HeraclitusTo our understanding, language is a great heaven prize and treasure for human in order tofulfill our vital needs as the social beings: communication Language appeared, remainsand flourishes along with human history With the seen development of language andlanguage studies at the moment, there is no need in proving the crucial and irreplaceableposition of language in human life.

However, there are now more and more researchers believing that communication withoutspoken and written words, termed “nonverbal communication” (NVC), is of vital role AsHeraclitus states above, people tend to rely on NVC and to base the partners’ message onthe nonverbal cues they receive One more important thing is that even nonverbalcommunication takes a big part in transferring meaning in communication; most people donot know how to read other’s behaviors Thus, the question is: what shape our behaviorsand decision? For a successful communication event, one possible answer is emotion.Therefore, the studies into nonverbal expressions for internal emotions have been paidmuch attention to The primary emotional states studied include: surprise, fear, disgust,anger, sadness and happiness Nevertheless, disappointment, one of two primary emotions(together with regret) that involve in decision-making – the success of a communicationevent, has not been much concerned.

All of this leads the author to the research naming: “An American – Vietnamese cultural study on non-verbal expressions of disappointment” This preliminary study

cross-tries to feature out the most common nonverbal expressions for disappointment in orderthat a successful communication event can be achieved between American and Vietnamesecommunicators.

ii Aims of the study

This research aims to:

- investigate the most common nonverbal expressions for disappointment used byAmericans and Vietnamese in cross-cultural communication.

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- raise the awareness of the importance of NVC and suggest ways to improve cross-culturalNVC.

In order to achieve the set aims of the study the research questions are as follows:

- What are the most common nonverbal expressions for disappointment used by Americansand/or Vietnamese?

- What are the similarities and differences between American and Vietnamese nonverbal expressions of disappointment?

iii Scope of the study

Nonverbal messages are widely transferred through many channels For the commonconsideration, it includes: paralanguage, body language, object language and environmentlanguage, of which object language and environment language do not have muchcontribution to express emotions which include disappointment It comes to our awarenessthat paralanguage (the vocal characteristics, types of vocal flow, vocal interferences,silence…) adds a high percentage to the process of communication However, due to thetime constraint and lack of reliable equipment (voice recorder, voice analyzer…), this kindof factor will be unavoidably out of the scope of the study.

So, the study only focuses on body language That is, this study limits itself to facialexpressions, gestures and postures only.

iv Methods of the study

In order to set up a firm theoretical background for the study, relevant publications are critically reviewed Information from the Internet sites and previous studies are also referred to.

The main method used in this study is quantitative with the illustration of tables and charts presenting statistic data The analysis is mainly based on the data collected through the survey questionnaires.

Consultation with the supervisor, discussion with colleagues, as well as the author’s observation in daily life and his own experience in cross-cultural communication are also of great help in finding out the answers to the research questions.

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v Organization of the study

The study will be organized into the following structure:

Part A: INTRODUCTION outlines the rationale, the methodology, the aims, the scope, thesignificance and the organization of the study.

Part B: DEVELOPMENT

Chapter 1 LITERATURE REVIEW reviews the theoretical issues It briefly presents anddiscusses the theory of communication, NVC with more detailed discussion on facialexpressions, gestures and postures which are major parts of body language.Disappointment as a human feeling and its nonverbal expressions are also discussed.Chapter 2 METHODOLOGY describes the data collecting instrument, the informants andresearch procedures.

Chapter 3 DATA ANALYSIS AND DISCUSSIONS OF THE FINDINGS presents anddiscusses similarities and differences in how to express disappointment nonverbally by theAmerican and the Vietnamese.

Part C: CONCLUSIONSummary of major findings

Conclusion and Implications for cross-cultural communicationLimitations of the study and Suggestions for further study.

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PART B: DEVELOPMENTCHAPTER 1 LITERATURE REVIEW1.1 CULTURE

As Harrison and Huntington noted, “the term ‘culture,’ of course, has had differentmeanings in different disciplines and different contexts” By stating “culture is the human-made part of the environment,” W.J.Lonner and R.S.Malpass (1994:7) contrast the cultureand the nature In their ideas, things in environment will never become cultural without the“touch” of human.

According to H Triandis (1994:23), “Culture is a set of human-made objective andsubjective elements that in the past have increased the probability of survival and resultedin satisfaction for the participants in a ecological niche, and this became shared amongthose who could communicate with each other because they had a common language andthey lived in the same time and place.” The subjective elements of culture here areelements such as values, attitudes, beliefs, orientations and underlying assumptionsprevalent among people in a society All of these elements act as a framework thatinfluences your interpretation of the world and interactions in it.

1.2 COMMUNICATION

1.2.1 Definition of Communication

“We are great communicators”

Liz & John Soars: 1997We, human beings, communicate during our whole life for our own purpose A child cries

(communicates) to his parents as he needs changing his diaper or feeding Family members

communicate for help and emotional support and to maintain a good family atmosphere Atwork, people communicate for the purpose of exchanging ideas, negotiating… Leaderscommunicate their visions to their staff Executives communicate to the lower-levelemployees Organizations communicate to their customers and the public Pressconferences, press releases, employee newsletters, catalogues, direct mail, phone calls,employee suggestion systems, meetings, formal performance appraisals, on-the-jobfeedback from managers, attitude surveys, speeches, conference room briefings, letters,

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memos and evaluation forms - all of these are examples of communication We now cometo a conclusion that communication is very important in our lives, as Hybels (1992:5)

claims “Communication, then, is vital to our lives To live is to communicate.”

Larry A., Richard E Porter and Edwin R McDaniel (2006:12) select the all-encompassing

definition of “human communication is the process through which symbols are transmitted

for the purpose of eliciting a response” Lustig (1996:29) defines communication as “asymbolic process in which people create shared meanings” In the both definitions, the

centre is “symbol” A symbol may be “a word, action or object”, containing thoughts,

perception or feelings one wants to communicate with others.

1.2.2 Forms of Communication

Communication as claimed by Lustig above is the process of exchange shared meanings.And in order to create share meaning, people have to use code or symbol In reality, thetwo kinds of code or symbol are verbal (spoken and written) and nonverbal (unspoken).These are referred to as forms of communication.

To get a better view, communication can be illustrated in the following diagram:

1.2.3 Components of Communication

The followings are components of communication according to Hymes: 1972.

- Situation: setting and sense

- Participants: speaker, presenter, hearer, receiver, narrator- End: purpose, result or goal

- Act sequences: model or language content

- Key: Clues that establish the "tone, manner, or spirit" of the speech act.- Instrumentalities: channel, form or style

- Norms: norms of interpretation, norms of interaction- Genres: kind of speech act or event

COMMUNICATION

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Among these, the participants (speaker and hearer) and situation are prominent to thechoice of message coder (language or nonverbal cues used) The participants’ backgroundimpacts much on the choice of the coder used The background includes: age, sex, livingplace, occupation… When discussing different participants and situations, the underlyingeffect of power (P), social distance (D) and rank of imposition (R) have to be considered.With combination of the three factors, the choice of message coder can be in diversity.

1.2.4 Cross-cultural communication

The relationship between culture and communication is often compared with the bondbetween the voice and the echo From culture and communication, there are three branchesof communication as follows:

Intra-cultural communication: is the communication between people who live in the samecountry and come from the same cultural background.

Inter-cultural communication: is the communication between people who live in the samecountry but come from different cultural background.

Cross-cultural communication: is the communication between people who live in differentcountries and come from different cultural background.

Coming from different geographic locations and holding different values, beliefs,… peoplein cross-cultural communication face more problems than in intra-cultural and inter-cultural branches This is because people have different ways of interpreting socialmeanings conveyed in their interaction with the outside world.

1.3 NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION1.3.1 Definition of nonverbal communication

In the process of communication, people do not only send verbal messages but nonverbalones as well NVC is understood as a way of communicating without the use of written orspoken language.

According to Lustig (1996:187-188), “nonverbal communication is a multi-channeled

process that is usually performed simultaneously; it typically involves a subtle set ofnonlinguistic behaviors that are often enacted subconsciously Nonverbal behaviors canbecome part of the communication process when someone intentionally tries to convey a

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message or when someone attributes meaning to the nonverbal behavior of another,whether or not the person intend to communicate a particular meaning.” As Lustig pointed

out, when some meaning is attached to a nonlinguistic behavior, whether by messagetransmitter or perceiver, that behavior becomes part of communication process.

The detailed description of NVC is presented by Nguyen Quang “all the components of the

message that, when taken together, constitute the communication which is not verballycoded but both vocally and non-vocally channeled Nonverbal communication is composedof paralinguistic factors (nonverbal - vocal channel), such as rate, volume, etc., and extra-linguistic factors (nonverbal - non-vocal channel), such as body language (gestures,postures, facial expressions,…) object language (including clothing, jewelry…) andenvironmental language (proxemics, settings…)”.

1.3.2 Importance of nonverbal communication

Most people believe the best way of communicating is verbal However, NVC is there,

even when people do not speak a word Pease (1984:7) states “The miracle is that human

hardly recognize his or her appearance, movements and gestures can tell one story whilehis or her voice is telling another story.” (Cited in Nguyen Quang).

A number of researches, with different approach and methods have pointed out theimportance of NVC.

Albert Mehrabian found that the total impact of a message is about 7 percent verbal (wordsonly), 38 percent vocal (including tone of voice, inflection and other sounds) and 55percent nonverbal (Pease, 1984:6)

Importance of nonverbal communication - Mehrabian

Chart 1: Importance of Nonverbal Communication

It is easy to conclude that NVC is an indispensable and all pervasive element in human

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behavior Perhaps its most obvious application is found in the fact that young children startcomprehending words at around six months of age yet understand NVC well before thattime Hence, from the moment of birth to the end of life, NVC is an important symbolsystem.

1.3.3 Differences between Nonverbal Communication and Verbal Communication

First of all, NVC seems to be more ambiguous than verbal communication This is becausenonverbal cues can be intentional or unintentional If an intentional behavior is perceivedand interpreted correctly, this can help to maintain good communication Meanwhile, if anunintentional behavior is interpreted as conveying meaning, it can cause the socialinteraction to go wrongly or even stop Additionally, the nonverbal cues can carry variousmeanings A silence can be interpreted as: agreement, disagreement, wondering, waitingfor other’s response, an indicator of surprise or happiness…

Secondly, NVC is continuous Verbal communication only starts when people start tomake sounds in an organized order and stops when the sound chunks stop However, NVCstarts when someone appears in communicating partner’s sight, continues even when thetwo people keep silent, and only ends when one gets out of the other’s sight.

Thirdly, NVC is multi-channeled Units of verbal communication appear in a linear orderin accordance with rules of grammar, vocabulary… Nonverbal cues appear at the sametime, requesting us to receive by some, even all five of our senses There are not only cuesbut also cluster of cues and areas of cues.

Fourthly, NVC reveals more about human’s emotion than verbal communication Verbalcommunication is often thought to be accurate in describing the various emotional states.In fact, it only describes either one aspect or one status of that emotional state.

The fifth characteristic of NVC is that people tend to rely on NVC if there is contradictionbetween verbal messages and nonverbal messages.

Last but not least, nonverbal cues can be perceived and interpreted differently in differentsocieties The same meanings can be expressed by different nonverbal cues and the samecues can be interpreted as conveying different meanings in different cultures.

1.3.4 Classification of nonverbal communication

Dwyer (2000) classifies NVC into: body movement, physical characteristics, touch, vocal

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characteristics (paralanguage), space (proximity), artifacts, and environment.

Hybels categorizes NVC into paralanguage, body movement/ kinesics, proxemics,chronemics, aesthetics, physical characteristics and artifacts.

Lustig et al discusses six types of nonverbal codes including: body movement/ kinesics,touch, time/ chronemics, voice, and other nonverbal code systems, consisting of chemical,physical, dermal and artifactual systems.

Of the various classifications, Nguyen Quang (2001:9) presents a detailed and follow one in the diagram below.

easy-to-Diagram 1: Classification of Nonverbal Communication

1.3.5 Nonverbal communication across culture

As shown in the discussion of differences between NVC and verbal communication,

Nonverbal Communication

- Vocal

characteristics+ Pitch

+ Volume+ Rate

+ Vocal quality- Types of vocal

flow- Vocal

interferences- Silence…

Body language/ Kinesics

Object language/ Artifacts

Environmental language

- Eye contact- Facial

expressions- Physical

characteristics- Gestures- Postures- Body

movements- Touch/ Haptics/

- Clothing- Jewelry- Accessories- Make-up- Artifactual

scents- Gifts- Flowers…

- Setting

- Conversational distance/ Proxemics- Time/

Chronemics- Lighting

system- Color- Heat…

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nonverbal cues can be ambiguous even with people of the same culture With people fromdifferent cultures, this is obviously more problematic.

A big amount of nonverbal cues are culture-specific This means these cues convey themessages that only members of that culture can interpret correctly.

1.4 DISAPPOINTMENT AND ITS NONVERBAL EXPRESSIONS

The size of your success is measured by the strength on your desire, the size of your dream,and how you handle disappointment along the way

Robert KiyosakiIs there any one here who has not experienced disappointment in his or her life? It is one ofthe oldest human experiences Each of us could make a lot of our unfulfilled wishes orseeds we planted which never grew into plants Anyone who has hopes or dreams may bewaited by some disappointment When their hopes or dreams can not become true.

Alexander Pope wrote “Blessed is the man who expects nothing, for he shall never be

Disappointment is a problem which transcends economics We can be well-off financiallyand still have all kinds of disappointment We can be disappointed with our familymembers, disappointed with our friends, with our marriage, or jobs for not reachingwhatever goals we have set for ourselves We can be disappointed because our life lacksmeaning and direction.

Let us consider a situation described by David E B (Jan-Feb 1985): your boss tells youhe is delighted with your performance over the past year and is giving you a $5000 bonus.Are you pleased? If you were not expecting a bonus, you would be delighted If you wereexpecting a $10,000 bonus, you would be disappointed He (David E Bell) claims that

“Disappointment is, then, a psychological reaction to an outcome that does not match up

to expectations”.

In a broader view, Loralea Michaelis states “Disappointment is a characteristic feature of

our shared condition as mortal creatures subject to the experiences of failure andfrustration: our plans may go awry, our actions may have unwanted consequences, ourexpectations may be frustrated and, in a more general sense, we are rarely the kind ofpeople we would like to be.”

It is stated in a sermon in St Ansgar’s Lutheran Church that “in the simplest terms,

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disappointment is unmet positive expectation The word positive here is important There

are some unmet expectation which bring us joy and satisfaction and not disappointment.For example you might go to see a physician with the expectation that your symptoms willlead to a diagnosis of terminal cancer You will not be disappointed if that expectationproves to be false Disappointment occurs when we expect a certain good thing to takeplace and it doesn’t.”

The same idea can be seen from Levering Bas “The question is whether expectation is a

sufficient condition for disappointment Do unfulfilled expectations by definition lead todisappointment? When a negative expectation is nourished, that is, when I expectsomething I would rather not see happen, and in fact it does not happen, then I feel reliefinstead of disappointment The question is whether relief can been seen as the opposite ofdisappointment in the sense that the former is about a cheerful feeling and the latter aboutan unpleasant one If I pass an exam about which I have had the most anxiousexpectations I am first relieved, then glad This means that when talking aboutdisappointment, there are always desired expectations involved.”

According to Moyo-Angle Bamidele, “everyone that has expectations and desires in life

will experience disappointment in one way or the other” and we experience disappointment

- When we expect things to happen in our own ways but they do not.

According to David E Bell (Jan.1985), disappointment is similar to regret:

“Disappointment is the feeling of dissatisfaction that follows the failure of expectations to

manifest Similar to regret, it differs in that the individual feeling regret focuses primarilyon personal choices contributing to a poor outcome, while the individual feelingdisappointment focuses on outcome.”

Francesco Marcatto and Donatella Ferrante claim that regret and disappointment aredifferent emotions They are both generated by comparing “What is” with “What might

have been” However, “the emotion of regret results from a comparison between an actual

outcome and a better outcome that might have occurred had another option been chosen

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(choice- or –behavior-focused counterfactual) Conversely, disappointment stems from thecomparison of an actual outcome with a better outcome that might have resulted hadworld events occurred differently (situation-focused counterfactuals) (van Djik, van derPligt & Zeelenberg, 1999)”

Disappointment may be very short-lasting and easy to transfer to another emotional state,anger, frustration or the like This emotional state can also be very harmful because it maylead to the following in communication:

- Lack of trust.

- Destruction of relationship

- Changing our perceptions to life, people and things we do.

According to many researchers and the author’s personal observation, expressions ofdisappointment is highly-culture-controlled In most Oriental countries, people, especiallywomen, are taught not to express their emotional states, especially ones likedisappointment, in social interaction in order to maintain the harmony in the community.However, at many points during the communication process, disappointment isintentionally expressed, not verbally but non-verbally, in order to let the partners to knowour own emotional state

From the author’s own observation and analysis of videos and photos searched on theInternet, the most popular expressions for disappointment are as follows:

Facial expressions:

When disappointed, people seem to have abnormal head positions which include:

tilted (left or right side), head-down (tilted forward) or face-up (to the ceiling) The tilted position can be found mostly when people are sitting while head-down and face-up isoften found with standing postures.

side-The eyes of disappointed people tend to lower down or to aim at nothing Many cases are

found with frowning eyes – eyebrows are pushed together Another popular cue is thecurve-up of eyebrows with frowning forehead In addition, the disappointed gaze is notvery often straight It is often down-looking with lowered eyelids, sometimes up-looking orside-looking, especially, when people try to control the disappointment, they tend to moveeye sight from side to side, avoiding eye contact with communicating partners.

With mouth, there are some popular cues including: contorted (pushed to one side),

pouting (upper and/or lower lip pushed up) Sometimes, the stiff lips are also found with

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hard-pressed lips and jaws making lips thinner than in normal state There are still cases inwhich people have smirks – or contorted smiles.

For gestures, it is the most common to find hand-with-face gestures and hand-with-head

gestures They can be: one palm covering one eye and/or cheek, one palm coveringforehead, both hands covering face, one or both hands touching or pulling hair Withsitting postures, fisted hand or hands, open palm or palms pushing cheeks or supportingchin can be found Another popular cue is the wide open arms with shrugging shoulders.With standing posture, the cue of arms over head (like religious gesture of Muslim peoplewhen praying to Allah) is also found Besides, the followings are also met: thumb-downgesture together with spouting lips, head shaking from side to side while spouting lips andmaintaining lower look.

Disappointed postures vary into categories: sitting and standing For sitting postures, the

followings can be found: collapsed posture with slouching arms and head down, headresting on folded arms, whole body collapsed with chin resting on table, semi-lying posture(like ownership posture with feet on floor) and knees up head down For standing andwalking postures, the most common are collapsed standing posture with head down or faceup, with slouching arms or hands resting on hips The following shift-of-postures areregularly met: from normal posture, especially sitting one, shifting to a collapsed one withback resting; from standing posture shifting to a sitting or lying one When people aretrying to put their disappointment under control, they can shift the head from the normalstate into a face-up (often found with middle open mouth), maintain some seconds andthen back to the normal state.

Followings are some illustrations of nonverbal expressions of disappointment.

Head position: The head in this expression is little tilted to the left

or right

Facial cues: The lower eyelids are a bit pulled down and the eye

gaze fixes at a low or sided position Lips do not close completelyand lip corners are a little pulled down.

Posture: Standing or sitting posture, arms are folded in a standard

arm-cross

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Head position: The head is often side-tilted.

Facial cues: Both lower and upper eyelids fall down making the eye

gaze a little down The lower lip is a bit pulled down and the mouthdoes not completely close.

Gesture: The arms are straight down along the body in standing

posture or put on thighs in sitting one.

Head position: The head is often in straight position.

Facial cues: Both upper and lower eyelids fall down while inner

corners of eyebrows are raised making a frowning forehead The eyegaze is often a little down The lips are in normal state

Gesture: Both hands are straight, holding cheeks

Head position: The head is often bent forward and/or little tilted.Facial cues: The lower eyelids are pulled down with eyebrows

curving up making the forehead frowning The eye gaze is oftenfixed at a low position.

Gesture: One hand supports the chin and covers the mouth with

fingers close.

Posture: This is a sitting posture with bending-down back, one

elbow putting on the thighs.

Facial cues: Both upper and lower eyelids are pulled down with

eyebrows being pushed together The eye gaze is fixed on the flooror a very low position The lower lip is a bit pushed up making thearea between lower lip and chin like a hollow.

Head position: The head is straight or little forward-leaning.

Facial cues: This face seems to have nothing “abnormal” except a

little frown on the forehead made by the little raise and together of the inner corners of eyebrows The eyes are expressivewith low eye gaze which does not focus Lips, chin and nose are inneutral states

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drawing-Head position: The head is often straight or little tilted.

Facial cues: Both upper and lower eyelids are pulled down while the

inner corners of eyebrows are raised, making the curving lines on theforehead The lower lip is raised whereas the lips corners are pulleddown shaping the mouth into a reversed “u” The muscles below lipcorners are pulled down while the area between lower lip and chin ispulled up

Facial cues: Every part on the face is neutral except the eye The

upper eyelids are little drawn back making the eyes open but the eyegaze is at nothing – a blank look.

Posture: This is sitting posture with knee up, head down The chin

rests on the knees and arms are put around the legs

Head position: The head is often straight or little forward.

Facial cues: The face here is mostly covered by the hand but

normally it is neutral with close eyes.

Gesture: One hand with spreading fingers cover most of the face,

with fingers touching the face skin Mouth and nose are oftencovered up.

Head position: The head is side-tilted with the support from one

hand over the ear.

Facial cues: The face is often blank, with just some frown over the

Posture: This is a sitting posture with knees raised to support arms

(elbow position).

Posture: This is a sitting posture in which knees are up, head is

down The back is bent forward and arms folded on the knees for theforehead to rest on.

Facial cues: This is similar to sad face with eyelids pulled down.

The eye gaze is often fixed at nothing Cheeks are pushed up

Gesture: Both hands open with fingers upward, holding cheeks and

supporting chin.

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Posture: This is a sitting posture with legs folded, knees raised to

support arms The back is bent forward.

Posture: This is a sitting posture with legs tightly close, vertical to

the floor The back is bent forward Arms rest on knees and supportthe face Hands open, palms are upward, covering the face.

Posture: This is a walking posture with disappointed face and head

down and straight arms

Posture: This is a standing posture with disappointed face and head

down The body leans against something.

Facial cues: The face is characterized with the raise of inner corners

of eyebrows and a curving-lined forehead accompanied with an openmouth.

Posture: This is a standing posture in which the knees are in a little

lower position so legs are not straight Legs are also straight in othervariations

Gesture: Both arms are raised high to face Hands are holding the

head.

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Facial cues: This is often accompanied with open mouth and

strongly-pressed teeth The nose is pushed up while lip corners aredrawn to face sides.

Posture: It is a standing posture with knees in lower position so the

whole body is lowered.

Gesture: Both hands are in fists, putting in front of the chest.

Facial cues: The face is upward with mouth opening.

Posture: This is a standing posture with hands resting on hips.

Posture: This is a standing posture with upper half of body bending

down, hand or hands holding head.

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CHAPTER 2: METHODOLOGY

2.1 COMMENTS ON THE SURVEY QUESTIONNAIRES AND DATA COLLECTION METHOD:

This research use data collected from various sources.

Firstly, the most common expressions of disappointment have been found from sharing services, photo-sharing services on the Internet

video-Then, questionnaires are distributed to Americans who have lived or worked withVietnamese, and Vietnamese who have lived or worked with the Americans Hybels claims

“Often we do not recognize our own nonverbal behavior” (Hybels, 1992:109) This is a

study on cross-cultural communication, so the author decided to investigate one’snonverbal expressions of disappointment through the observation, perception andinterpretation of their communicating partners That is, the American informants wereasked to give their comments on their Vietnamese communicating partners’ nonverbalexpressions of disappointment, and the Vietnamese informants were asked to comment onthe way their American communicating partners express their disappointment nonverbally.The questionnaire has three parts:

Part 1 is designed for getting personal information of the informants including the length ofstay or work with Vietnamese/American people and the informants’ understanding abouthost cultures or culture of their communicating partners

Part 2 investigates the most common nonverbal expressions of disappointment used byAmerican and Vietnamese people Here are some of the expressions believed to expressdisappointment and informants were asked to choose the frequency at which eachexpression is used by American and Vietnamese people.

Question 1: From your personal observation, how often do Vietnamese people use thefollowing nonverbal behaviors to express their disappointment? Please choose from 1 to 3(1 = Never, 2 = Sometimes and 3 = Always)

Part 3 includes three questions to get the information about American and Vietnamese

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