Wasteful Words and Infelicities

221 Wasteful Words and Infelicities C HAPTER 12 Wasteful Words and Infelicities 221 Speaking errors aren’t always a matter of leaving out a word or using a word in the wrong way. Some errors result from too many words—such as the kind of murky or incorrect sentences you end up with when you sprinkle around an extra “a,” “on,” or “as” or two. The following sections include the most problem- atic errors that arise from tossing in an extra word where it doesn’t belong: 142. A half a Don’t Say: Jerald ate a half a rhubarb pie before we could stop him. Say Instead: Jerald ate half a rhubarb pie before we could stop him. Here’s Why: The first “a” here is unnecessary. Say either, He ate one half of a pie, or He ate half of a pie. 143. And et cetera Don’t Say: We took everything to the game—the blan- kets, the thermos, the stadium cushions, and et cetera. Say Instead: We took everything to the game—the blan- kets, the thermos, the stadium cushions, et cetera. u Bad Grammar Ch 12.pmd 3/17/2004, 9:47 AM221 222 When Bad Grammar Happens to Good People Here’s Why: The Latin phrase “et cetera” means “and other things.” So putting an “and” in front of the phrase is unneces- sary. Just say “et cetera” and be done with it. 144. Like Don’t Say: Do you want to go for, like, a big dinner or just a snack? Say Instead: Do you want to go for a big dinner or just a snack? Here’s Why: The use of “like” in this way, just sprinkled in, is a big indicator of unpolished, informal speaking. It’s a hard habit to break, but one worth working on, because a few of these “likes” in a sentence send all the wrong signals. 145. The field of Don’t Say: What makes Susan interested in the field of engineering? Say Instead: What makes Susan interested in engineering? Here’s Why: “In the field of” is just a little more than you need to get the idea across here. It’s not that there’s anything grammatically wrong with the phrase, but it’s clutter. You don’t need it unless your whole meaning is about the field as a field, say, for example, if it were the subject of the sentence The field of engineering is crowded. 146. Needless to say Don’t Say: Needless to say, this has been an exciting party. Say Instead: This has been an exciting party. Here’s Why: “Needless to say” can be an extremely useful expression, with either a serious or ironic meaning. As a serious expression, it can signal that you and your audience share a belief that’s been challenged or threatened in some way: He asked me to run away with him to Tahiti, but I refused, needless to say. As u Bad Grammar Ch 12.pmd 3/17/2004, 9:47 AM222 223 Wasteful Words and Infelicities an ironic expression, it can humorously flag an idea that you and your audience know is not true: Needless to say, Grandma’s been arrested five times for rioting and being disorderly in the streets. In both of these legitimate uses of the phrase, it’s meant to em- phasize some important common assumptions you share with the people listening to you or reading your words: It creates a sense of community. But the phrase is often overused, as in our example, where it emphasizes an unimportant opinion—that a party has been exciting—rather than a crucial belief—that one shouldn’t run off to Tahiti when one has other commitments, or that one’s grandmother is a perfectly moral person. In this sort of case, “needless to say” is needless to say: It’s clutter, and it can become a bad habit if you use it too often. Whenever you feel tempted to say “needless to say,” ask yourself whether it’s doing any meaningful work for you. If not, leave it out; save it for more important occasions. 147. Time period Don’t Say: Alphonse and Mario had not seen each other for a very long time period. Say Instead: Alphonse and Mario had not seen each other for a very long time. Here’s Why: The word “period” carries with it a sense of time, so it’s rare that you need to use both words together. Sim- ply say a long time or a designated period. 148. Party Don’t Say: Officer, she is the party who hit my car. Say Instead: Officer, she is the one who hit my car. Here’s Why: So who are you, a would-be district attor- ney? “Party” shouldn’t be used as a substitute for “person” un- less you’re a lawyer writing a legal brief or a restaurant hostess, asking, Are you with the Cooper party? “Party” seems to get used in this way when someone believes a touch of formality is in order. But it’s not only incorrect in this context, it’s a sign that u Bad Grammar Ch 12.pmd 3/17/2004, 9:47 AM223 224 When Bad Grammar Happens to Good People you’re trying too hard. Even the district attorney, if he knows his stuff, would simply say she’s the one or she’s the person or even she’s the nut—but never she’s the party. Test: Wasteful Words Please revise the following sentences, replacing or eliminat- ing the clutter words and phrases in italics. 1. When Melvyn sued Sarah for custody of their pet iguana, I was asked to adjudicate between the two parties. 2. He’d gulped down a half a glass of grape juice before he realized it was cough medicine. 3. One can find almost anything on his kitchen floor: dirty laun- dry, cans of cat food, the lost ark of the covenant, and et cetera. 4. I’m, like, so thrilled to, like, meet you that I can, like, barely speak. 5. Her parents wanted her to study the field of architecture, but Pauline was more interested in going to art school. 6. Needless to say, Stuart was wearing a pretty appalling tie this morning. 7. Vladimir has been waiting for Godot for a long time period. Answer Key: Wasteful Words 1. When Melvyn sued Sarah for custody of their pet iguana, I was asked to adjudicate between the two of them. 2. He’d gulped down half a glass of grape juice before he real- ized it was cough medicine. 3. One can find almost anything on his kitchen floor: the lost ark of the covenant, et cetera. Make sure you pronounce “et cetera” correctly: not as “ex cetera,” but with a hard “t” sound in the “et”: “eT cetera.” 4. I’m so thrilled to meet you that I can barely speak. 5. Her parents wanted her to study architecture, but Pauline was more interested in going to art school. u Bad Grammar Ch 12.pmd 3/17/2004, 9:47 AM224 225 Wasteful Words and Infelicities Again, “in the field of” isn’t so much incorrect as unnecessary. 6. Stuart was wearing a pretty appalling tie this morning. In this instance, “needless to say” belongs to the club of unnecessary phrases; it’s not incorrect, just fluff. 7. Vladimir has been waiting for Godot for a long time. u Bad Grammar Ch 12.pmd 3/17/2004, 9:47 AM225 This page intentionally left blank . 221 Wasteful Words and Infelicities C HAPTER 12 Wasteful Words and Infelicities 221 Speaking errors aren’t always. 223 Wasteful Words and Infelicities an ironic expression, it can humorously flag an idea that you and your audience know is not true: Needless to say, Grandma’s