04 girl wash your face by rachel hollis

PRAISE FOR Girl, Wash Your Face “If Rachel Hollis tells you to wash your face, turn on that water! She is the mentor every woman needs, from new mommas to seasoned business women.” —ANNA TODD, New York Times and #1 internationally bestselling author of the After series “Rachel’s voice is the winning combination of an inspiring life coach and your very best (and funniest) friend Shockingly honest and hilariously down to earth, Girl, Wash Your Face is a gift to women who want to flourish and live a courageously authentic life.” —MEGAN TAMTE, founder and co-CEO of Evereve “There aren’t enough women in leadership telling other women to GO FOR IT We typically get the caregiver; we rarely get the boot camp instructor Rachel lovingly but firmly tells us it is time to stop letting the tail wag the dog and get on with living our wild and precious lives Girl, Wash Your Face is a dose of high-octane straight talk that will spit you out on the other end chasing down dreams you up long ago Love this girl.” —JEN HATMAKER, New York Times bestselling author of For the Love and Of Mess and Moxie and happy online hostess to millions every week “In Rachel Hollis’s first nonfiction book, you will find she is less cheerleader and more life coach This means readers won’t just walk away inspired, they will walk away with the right tools in hand to actually do their dreams Dream doing is what Rachel is all about it You will be, too, when you read her newest book.” —JESSICA HONEGGER, founder and co-CEO of the Noonday Collection “Rachel has one of those rare abilities to make you laugh out loud and also completely rethink your entire life all in one paragraph Her words and this book are a gift and we know they’ll encourage and challenge you deeply.” —JEFFERSON AND ALYSSA BETHKE, New York Times bestselling authors of Jesus>Religion and Love That Lasts © 2018 by Rachel Hollis All rights reserved No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means— electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or other—except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Nelson Books, an imprint of Thomas Nelson Nelson Books and Thomas Nelson are registered trademarks of HarperCollins Christian Publishing, Inc Thomas Nelson titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business, fund-raising, or sales promotional use For information, please e-mail SpecialMarkets@ThomasNelson.com Any Internet addresses, phone numbers, or company or product information printed in this book are offered as a resource and are not intended in any way to be or to imply an endorsement by Thomas Nelson, nor does Thomas Nelson vouch for the existence, content, or services of these sites, phone numbers, companies, or products beyond the life of this book Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Versionđ, NIVđ Copyright â 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan All rights reserved worldwide www.zondervan.com The “NIV”and “New International Version” are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™ Scripture quotations marked WEB are taken from the World English Bible Public domain Epub Edition December 2017 ISBN 9781400201662 ISBN 978-1-4002-01662 (eBook) Library of Congress Cataloging-inPublication Data ISBN 978-1-4002-01655 Library of Congress Control Number: 2017949726 Printed in the United States of America 18 19 20 21 22 LSC 10 For Jen, who has shaken my worldview off its axis three times: once with Interrupted, once with a trip to Ethiopia, and lastly by teaching us all that a real leader speaks the truth, even to her own detriment maybe that was just something I had always believed about myself So I started training for a half marathon— which, if you’re curious, is like running in sand while wearing a backpack full of pudding Everything is hard Everything feels awkward Every single new mile makes you want to puke But I didn’t give up, and slowly— so stinking slowly—I got stronger and better, one quarter-mile at a time As it turns out, I’m actually a really good long-distance runner I have short little legs, so Dave (or basically anyone) can beat me in a sprint all day long But here’s the deal: very few people (and I can say this confidently) can mindover-matter themselves as well as I can I’ve lived through fifty-two hours of labor I’ve built a company from the ground up using streetsmarts and the cash from my day job I’ve built my life on not giving up on the goals I set for myself So if I say I’m going to run thirteen miles, I am darn well going to run thirteen miles! That means when mile six hits and Dave wants to quit and start walking, I fly right past him, tortoise-and-the-hare style The very first half marathon I ever signed up for was a Disney race As a sidenote, please, please, please do yourself a favor and make it a life goal to run in a Disney race! They have 5Ks, 10Ks, and half marathons, and I don’t think I’ve ever experienced something so uplifting and fun It’s important to note the fun element because I walked into the race that morning so afraid of how hard it was going to be that I thought I would barf But at a Disney race, there’s too much magic to barf! The races take place inside and around the parks, so you’re running by rides and princesses and floats Other runners are dressed as Disney characters and stopping for photos along the way and it’s just joyful Also, having run in other half marathons many times since, I can tell you that the encouragement in these races is unmatched There is something incredibly touching about thousands upon thousands of people coming together to run toward a common goal There were people in wheelchairs and others who were severely overweight There were people who were eighty-five years old and young babies being pushed in strollers There were pregnant women, you guys! Freaking beautiful, in-shape, pregnant women who were running over ten miles with a full belly I was in awe! Everywhere I turned I saw people actively challenging themselves to be something better—and it was a beauty to behold We were one giant, sweaty mass of hope, made up of people from all walks of life who’d dreamed this dream and found themselves on the road together With that many people, it takes a while to make your way to the start of the line, but when my queue was called up, they started playing “A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes” from Cinderella over the loudspeakers I know it sounds cheesy in the retelling, but, y’all, I was bawling by the time it was my turn to run I kept thinking, This is a wish my heart made! And for once I didn’t beg off or get lazy or stop trying I did it! Running thirteen miles is really tough, and later, when I trained and ran my first full marathon, I thought I was going to die Straight Up Die Sometimes within the race I’d see a mile marker and take a selfie of me leaping across to show how great I was feeling Other times it took everything I had to put one foot in front of the other But it was during that first half marathon—mile eleven, to be exact—that I struggled the most I kept scrolling through my iPod to find a song that would fire me up, because by that point I’d listened to or skipped over every tune I had I landed on “I Need a Hero” by Bonnie Tyler I love me some eighties music, and this one gets me going every time It did the trick I was feeling a little better and picking up my pace as I started to sing along with Bonnie “I need a hero ” As any child of the eighties knows, the whole song is about her looking for a man, a hero, a “streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds,” and there I was singing along at the end of mile eleven when I had one of the biggest epiphanies of my adult life: I don’t need to find anyone Right now, in this moment, I’m my own hero It was a profound realization in my life I had pushed myself to do something I never thought I could be capable of, and it lit a fire within my own soul Nobody forced me to put in those miles Nobody woke me up in the morning and made me research the right shoes or which GU packets were least disgusting Nobody else got the sunburns or the blisters or saved up to pay the entrance fee That was all me And the things you’ve achieved? The big and little stuff that peppers your life and adds flavor, the achievements that have made you who you are—those are all you I heard once that every author has a theme, and they basically just write the same message over and over in each book despite the plot or the characters This is absolutely my truth, even if I was totally oblivious to it at the time Every book I’ve ever written is based on this core theme of my life It’s the lesson I’ve learned over and over again, so it inevitably weaves its way into my stories—and this book especially It is the gift I wish I could give every person I know It is the thing I wish someone had taught me as a child Instead, I had to navigate life and figure it out on my own It is the greatest lesson I have to give you Only you have the power to change your life This is the truth I ran an entire marathon with Philippians 4:13 written on my hand in Sharpie, and I believe that my Creator is the strength by which I achieve anything But God, your partner, your mama, and your best friends —none of them can make you into something (good or bad) without your help You have the ability to change your life You’ve always had the power, Dorothy You just have to stop waiting for someone else to do it for you There is no easy way out of this; there is no life hack Just you and your God-given strength and how much you desire change I hope, pray, wish, cross my fingers and my toes that you will look around and find an opportunity to be your own hero Every woman should feel that kind of pride, but if you’re seeking change you shouldn’t just want that for yourself, you should need it You need to set a goal for yourself and then work your butt off to get there I don’t care if that goal is to pay off your credit card or lose ten pounds or run an Iron Man You need to make a move right now while you’re still on fire from this book about what goal you’re setting for yourself Then you need to go it You need to prove to yourself that you can do it You need to prove to yourself that you are capable of anything you set your mind to You have the power You, exhausted mother of three who’s considering heading back to work but is afraid she’s been out of the loop too long You, fifty pounds overweight and conscious that your health is in jeopardy if you don’t make drastic changes You, in your early twenties who wants love but gives away your body in order to feel connection and instead only feels emptier You, who wants better relationships with the people you love but can’t let go of your anger in order to get there You, all of you, any of you Stop waiting for someone else to fix your life! Stop assuming that someday it will magically improve on its own Stop presuming that if you only had the right job, the right man, the right house, the right car, the right whatever that your life will become what you’ve always dreamed of Be honest about who you are and what you need to do to make change Girl, get ahold of your life Stop medicating, stop hiding out, stop being afraid, stop giving away pieces of yourself, stop saying you can’t do it Stop the negative self-talk, stop abusing your body, stop putting it off for tomorrow or Monday or next year Stop crying about what happened and take control of what happens next Get up, right now Rise up from where you’ve been, scrub away the tears and the pain of yesterday, and start again Girl, wash your face! ACKNOWLEDGMENTS First and foremost, I have to thank you, my Chic Tribe Years ago I started blogging about what I ate for dinner, and even then, when my pictures sucked and I had no idea what I was doing— even then I found a community of supportive women online When I self-published my first book, you were there When I nervously (and awkwardly) went on TV for the first time, you were there When I tried Instagram or danced on YouTube or told embarrassing stories in Rach Talk, you were there And now we’re here with this book and this platform and this incredible community of hundreds of thousands of women all over the world—and that’s because you are still here Thank you, thank you, thank you, friends, for showing up for me and with me again and again I believe we can change the world together I believe we already have I am grateful as always to my mentor and champion—who also happens to be my literary agent, Kevan Lyon Kevan, I’m not sure if you had any idea what you were getting yourself into when you took that first phone call with me, but I’m so stinking thankful you’ve come along for the ride Thank you to the incredible, hardworking team at Thomas Nelson and HarperCollins for taking on this project Thanks, too, for the cheddar biscuits and chips and guac and wine and dessert and all the untold snacks and group dinners yet to be On average I spend at least six months of the year writing and/or editing a book, which means six months of mood swings, outlines, verbal processing, and caffeine-induced hysteria as I work to meet a deadline I could not any of this without the help of an incredible, incomparable team at Chic who keeps the train moving forward even when the conductor is in a fetal position in the corner crying over book edits Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone at Chic HQ who continues to help me build this dream Endless thanks to Johana Monroy, who has loved and cared for our family for years People ask me how I do it all, and the honest truth is, I absolutely don’t Behind the scenes is an incredible, loving friend and sister who takes care of my kiddos when work or travel takes me away from them Jojo, I literally don’t know how we would do life without you Thank you to my children: Jackson, Sawyer, Ford, and Noah I’m so grateful that God allowed me to be your mommy It is the greatest honor of my life Thank you to my husband, Dave Hollis, who allowed much of our story to be retold—not just in this book but over the last eight years of public life—even when the retelling was difficult I am blessed to be married to someone who believes as deeply as I in vulnerability and the power of “me too.” Lastly a significant thank you to my parents I am truly grateful for the pieces I carry of both of you that have made me the woman I am today Our life might not have looked like anyone else’s; it was at times joyful and painful and chaotic and magical and good and hard, but I wouldn’t change it I am who I am because of who I come from I love you both ABOUT THE AUTHOR Rachel Hollis is a bestselling author, TV personality, in-demand speaker, and founder and CEO of Chic Media, the foremost authority on premium digital content for women Named one of Inc Magazine’s “Top 30 Entrepreneurs Under 30,” Rachel uses her infectious energy to empower women to take control of their lives and pursue their passions without fear Motivational, inspirational, and always approachable, Rachel’s tell-it-like-it-is attitude is a refreshing approach that allows her to authentically connect with millions of women around the world Rachel has worked with top brands to create innovative and compelling content for Chic Media’s award-winning women’s lifestyle blog Rachel is the author of the bestselling Girls Series, including Party Girl, Sweet Girl, and Smart Girl, as well as a cookbook, Upscale Downhome Rachel resides in Los Angeles with her husband and four children For more information, visit TheChicSite.com ...PRAISE FOR Girl, Wash Your Face “If Rachel Hollis tells you to wash your face, turn on that water! She is the mentor every woman needs, from... bestselling author of the After series Rachel s voice is the winning combination of an inspiring life coach and your very best (and funniest) friend Shockingly honest and hilariously down to earth, Girl, Wash Your Face is a gift to women who want to flourish and live... characteristics in yourself I want to grab you by the shoulders and shake you until your teeth rattle I want to get in your face until you have the courage to look me in the eyes and see the answer for yourself