Interpersonal communication

T o reßect the experiences and expectations of todayÕs student population, Interpersonal Communication: The Whole Story addresses a broader range of interpersonal communication topics than any other book of its kindÑby incorporating Òdark sideÓ IPC throughout the text and by including diverse populations in its research-based and everyday examples Drawing upon his own contemporary research on affection in relationships, and on the interplay of communication, physiology, and health, Kory Floyd has crafted a down-to-earth, 21st-century perspective on interpersonal communication ÒKory Floyd offers novel and intriguing Þndings from research that not only challenge pop culture understandings of interpersonal communication, but provide a starting point for classroom discussions.Ó ÑPaul Schrodt, Texas Christian University ÒDr Floyd has written in a style that is clear, concise, and readable In particular, I appreciate the way he includes what students can learn/gain from the inclusion/application of empirical research to reinforce the discussion of content.Ó ÑKeith Griffin, SIU-Carbondale ÒReading FloydÕs writing feels like listening to a friend talk about these concepts.Ó ÑKelly Petkus, Austin CC For additional instructor and student resources visit www.mhhe.com/ßoydipc1e ISBN 978-0-07-340664-0 MHID 0-07-340664-3 0 0 interpersonal communication the whole story the whole story MD DALIM #986900 09/28/08 CYAN MAG YELO BLK ÒWell written and easy to read, with wide-ranging coverage of key topics, and the inclusion of new perspectives based in health and physiology, technology, and scholarly research, this book truly has it all.Ó ÑMark T Morman, Baylor University interpersonal communication ÒRefreshingly, the author delivers on what was promised in the preface With skillful balance, the author presents everything youÕd expect and more.Ó ÑLeighanne Heisel, University of Missouri-St Louis KORY FLOYD SALT AND PEPPERÉIT TAKES TWO 780073 406640 www.mhhe.com KORY FLOYD Interpersonal Communication TH E WH OL E S TORY Kory Floyd Arizona State University Boston Burr Ridge, IL Dubuque, IA Madison, WI New York San Francisco St Louis Bangkok Bogotá Caracas Kuala Lumpur Lisbon London Madrid Mexico City Milan Montreal New Delhi Santiago Seoul Singapore Sydney Taipei Toronto flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd i 10/15/08 10:27:56 AM Published by McGraw-Hill, an imprint of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc., 1221 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020 Copyright © 2009 All rights reserved No part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written consent of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc., including, but not limited to, in any network or other electronic storage or transmission, or broadcast for distance learning WCK ISBN: 978-0-07-325877-5 (Instructor’s Edition) MHID: 0-07-325877-6 ISBN: 978-0-07-340664-0 (Student’s Edition) MHID: 0-07-340664-3 Editor-in-Chief: Michael Ryan Publisher: Frank Mortimer Executive Editor: Katie Stevens Director of Development: Rhona Robbin Senior Development Editors: Nanette Giles and Jennie Katsaros Executive Marketing Manager: Leslie Oberhuber Senior Production Editor: Anne Fuzellier Art Director: Preston Thomas Art Manager: Robin Mouat Design Manager and Cover Designer: Andrei Pasternak Interior Designer: Jeanne Calabrese Senior Photo Research Coordinator: Natalia Peschiera Photo Researcher: Romy Charlesworth Senior Production Supervisor: Tandra Jorgensen Composition: 10/12 Celeste by Thompson Type Printing: 45# Pub Matte Plus by Quebecor World Cover images: ThinkStock/SuperStock Credits: The credits section for this book begins on page C-1 and is considered an extension of the copyright page Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Floyd, Kory Interpersonal communication / Kory Floyd — 1st ed p cm Includes bibliographical references and index ISBN-13: 978-0-07-340664-0 (alk paper) ISBN-10: 0-07-340664-3 (alk paper) Interpersonal communication I Title BF637.C45F56 2009 153.6—dc22 2008038146 The Internet addresses listed in the text were accurate at the time of publication The inclusion of a Web site does not indicate an endorsement by the authors or McGraw-Hill, and McGraw-Hill does not guarantee the accuracy of the information presented at these sites www.mhhe.com flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd ii 10/22/08 7:29:50 AM To Luke, Abby, Megan, and Ben flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd iii 10/15/08 10:27:56 AM } Brief Contents { About Communication Culture and Gender Communication and the Self Interpersonal Perception Language Nonverbal Communication Listening Interpersonal Communication in Social Relationships 291 Intimate Relationships 331 10 Interpersonal Conflict 373 11 Deceptive Communication 12 Emotion 39 81 121 163 207 257 407 433 iv flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd iv 10/15/08 10:27:56 AM } Contents { About Communication How Culture Affects Communication 47 Individualism and Collectivism 48 High- and Low-Context Cultures 49 Low- and High-Power Distance 50 Masculine and Feminine Cultures 51 Monochronic and Polychronic Cultures 52 Uncertainty Avoidance 52 Cultural Communication Codes 53 Why Do We Communicate? Communication Meets Physical Needs Communication Meets Relational Needs Communication Fills Identity Needs Communication Meets Spiritual Needs Communication Serves Instrumental Needs Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 10 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 55 The Nature of Communication 11 Understanding Gender and Communication 55 Three Models of Human Communication 11 Six Characteristics of Communication 15 Dispelling Some Communication Myths 20 Gender Roles and Communication 56 Biological Sex and Communication 60 Sexual Orientation and Communication 61 Some Explanations for Gendered Communication 63 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 24 How Do We Communicate Interpersonally? 24 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 65 What Makes Communication Interpersonal? 24 Why Interpersonal Communication Matters 27 How Gender Affects Communication 66 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 28 Gender and Verbal Communication 67 Gender and Nonverbal Communication 71 Building Your Communication Competence 29 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 74 What Does Communicating Competently Mean? 29 Characteristics of Competent Communicators 30 Master the Chapter 75 Chapter Outline and Summary 75 Key Terms 77 Discussion Questions 77 Practice Quiz 77 Research Library 79 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 33 Master the Chapter 34 Chapter Outline and Summary 34 Key Terms 35 Discussion Questions 36 Practice Quiz 36 Research Library 37 Culture and Gender 39 Understanding Culture and Communication 41 What Is a Culture? 41 The Components of Culture 44 Cultures and Co-Cultures 45 Communicating with Cultural Awareness 46 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 47 Communication and the Self 81 Understanding the Self: Your Self-Concept 83 What Is a Self-Concept? 83 How a Self-Concept Develops 86 Awareness and Management of the SelfConcept 91 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 94 Valuing the Self: Self-Esteem 94 Benefits and Drawbacks of Self-Esteem 94 Culture, Sex, and Self-Esteem 98 The Self and Interpersonal Needs 98 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 100 v flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd v 10/15/08 10:27:56 AM Presenting the Self: Image Management 100 Principles of Image Management 100 Managing Face Needs 104 Language 163 The Nature of Language 165 Principles of Self-Disclosure 107 Benefits of Self-Disclosure 112 Risks of Self-Disclosure 114 Language Is Symbolic 166 Language Is Arbitrary (Mostly) 167 Language Is Governed by Rules 167 Language Has Layers of Meaning 168 Language Varies in Clarity 170 Language Is Bound by Context and Culture 172 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 116 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 173 Master the Chapter 116 Appreciating the Power of Words 174 Chapter Outline and Summary 116 Key Terms 118 Discussion Questions 118 Practice Quiz 118 Research Library 119 Naming Defines and Differentiates Us 175 We Use Words to Persuade 177 Credibility Empowers Us 179 Language Expresses Affection and Intimacy 182 Words Provide Comfort and Healing 184 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 106 Communicating the Self: Self-Disclosure 107 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 185 Interpersonal Perception 121 How We Use and Abuse Language 186 Humor: What’s So Funny? 186 Euphemisms: Soft Talk 187 Slang: The Language of Subcultures 188 Libel and Slander: Harmful Words 189 Profanity: Offensive Language 190 Hate Speech: Profanity with a Hurtful Purpose 190 Perception is a Process 123 What Is Interpersonal Perception? 123 Three Stages of the Perception Process 123 What Influences Our Perceptual Accuracy? 127 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 131 Fundamental Forces in Interpersonal Perception 132 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 192 Stereotyping Relies on Generalizations 133 The Primacy Effect Governs First Impressions 134 The Recency Effect Influences Impressions 136 Our Perceptual Set Limits What We Perceive 137 Egocentrism Narrows Our Perspective 140 Positivity and Negativity Biases Affect Perception 140 Improving Your Language Use 193 Consider the Effect You Wish to Create 193 Separate Opinions from Factual Claims 195 Speak at an Appropriate Level 197 Own Your Thoughts and Feelings 198 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 201 Master the Chapter 201 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 142 Chapter Outline and Summary 201 Key Terms 203 Discussion Questions 203 Practice Quiz 203 Research Library 203 How We Explain What We Perceive 143 We Explain Behavior Through Attributions 143 How to Recognize Common Attribution Errors 144 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 148 Improving Your Perceptual Abilities 150 Be Mindful of Your Perceptions 151 Check Your Perceptions 153 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 158 Master the Chapter 158 Chapter Outline and Summary 158 Key Terms 160 Discussion Questions 160 Practice Quiz 160 Research Library 161 vi Nonverbal Communication 207 The Nature of Nonverbal Communication 209 What is Nonverbal Communication? 209 Five Characteristics of Nonverbal Communication 210 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 217 CONTENTS flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd vi 10/15/08 10:27:56 AM Ten Channels of Nonverbal Communication 218 Common Barriers to Effective Listening 269 Noise 271 Pseudolistening and Selective Attention 271 Information Overload 272 Glazing Over 273 Rebuttal Tendency 274 Closed-Mindedness 274 Competitive Interrupting 275 Facial Displays 218 Eye Behaviors 221 Movement and Gestures 222 Touch Behaviors 224 Vocal Behaviors 226 The Use of Smell 229 The Use of Space 230 Physical Appearance 232 The Use of Time 233 The Use of Artifacts 233 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 277 Becoming a Better Listener 277 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 235 Becoming a Better Informational Listener 278 Becoming a Better Critical Listener 278 Becoming a Better Empathic Listener 282 Functions of Nonverbal Communication 235 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 285 Managing Conversations 235 Expressing Emotions 237 Maintaining Relationships 238 Forming Impressions 239 Influencing Others 242 Concealing Information 244 Master the Chapter 285 Chapter Outline and Summary 285 Key Terms 287 Discussion Questions 287 Practice Quiz 287 Research Library 289 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 246 Improving Your Nonverbal Communication Skills 247 Interpreting Nonverbal Communication 247 Expressing Nonverbal Messages 249 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 250 Master the Chapter 251 Chapter Outline and Summary 251 Key Terms 254 Discussion Questions 254 Practice Quiz 254 Research Library 255 Listening 257 The Nature of Listening 259 What Is Listening? 259 The Importance of Listening Effectively 260 Some Misconceptions About Listening 262 Culture Affects Listening Behavior 263 Interpersonal Communication in Social Relationships 291 Why Social Relationships Matter 293 We Form Relationships Because We Need to Belong 293 Social Relationships Bring Rewards 294 Social Relationships Carry Costs as Well as Rewards 296 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 297 Forming and Maintaining Social Bonds 297 Attraction Theory 297 Uncertainty Reduction Theory 302 Predicted Outcome Value Theory 302 Understanding Relationship Formation 202 Theories About Costs and Benefits 304 Relational Maintenance Behaviors 308 Understanding Relationship Maintenance 310 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 311 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 264 Characteristics of Friendships 311 Ways of Listening 264 Stages of Effective Listening 264 Three Types of Listening 267 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 269 Friendships Are Voluntary 311 Friends Are Usually Peers 312 Friendships Are Governed by Rules 313 Friendships Differ by Sex 313 Friendships Have a Life Span 315 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 319 CONTENTS flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd vii vii 10/15/08 10:27:57 AM Social Relationships in the Workplace 319 Master the Chapter 368 Social Relationships with Co-Workers 320 Social Relationships Between Superiors and Subordinates 321 Social Relationships with Clients 322 Chapter Outline and Summary 368 Key Terms 370 Discussion Questions 370 Practice Quiz 370 Research Library 371 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 324 Master the Chapter 325 Chapter Outline and Summary 325 Key Terms 326 Discussion Questions 326 Practice Quiz 326 Research Library 329 10 What is Interpersonal Conflict? 375 Defining Interpersonal Conflict 375 Thinking About Interpersonal Conflict 376 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 378 Conflict in Personal Relationships 378 Intimate Relationships 331 Characteristics of Interpersonal Conflict 378 The Most Common Sources of Conflict 383 How Sex and Gender Affect Conflict 385 How Culture Affects Conflict 386 Conflict Online 387 The Nature of Intimate Relationships 333 Intimate Relationships Require Deep Commitment 333 Intimate Relationships Foster Interdependence 333 Intimate Relationships Require Continuous Investment 335 Intimate Relationships Spark Dialectical Tensions 335 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 388 Power and Conflict 388 Some Characteristics of Power 388 Forms of Power 390 Sex, Gender, and Power 392 Culture and Power 394 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 337 Communicating in Romantic Relationships 338 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 395 Characteristics of Romantic Relationships 338 Forming Romantic Relationships Is a Process 342 Interpersonal Communication in Romantic Relationships 346 Ending Romantic Relationships Is a Process 351 Managing Interpersonal Conflict 395 Problematic Behaviors During Conflict 395 Strategies for Managing Conflict Successfully 397 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 400 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 354 Master the Chapter 402 Chapter Outline and Summary 402 Key Terms 402 Discussion Questions 404 Practice Quiz 404 Research Library 405 Communicating in Families 354 What Makes a Family a Family? 355 Types of Families 356 The Family as a System 358 Communication Issues in Families 359 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 362 Improving Communication in Intimate Relationships 362 Emphasize Excitement and Positivity 362 Handle Conflict Constructively 364 Have Realistic Expectations 365 Manage Dialectical Tensions 365 Interpersonal Conflict 373 11 Deceptive Communication 407 The Nature of Interpersonal Deception 409 What Is Deception? 410 The Basic Elements of Deception 412 Interpersonal Deception Is Common 413 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 415 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 367 viii CONTENTS flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd viii 10/22/08 7:29:50 AM Deceptive Acts are Diverse 415 The Nature of Emotion 443 Some Reasons Why People Deceive 415 Some Deceptive Acts Are Acts of Simulation 417 Some Deceptive Acts Are Acts of Dissimulation 417 Emotions Are Multidimensional 444 Emotions Vary in Valence and Intensity 446 Emotions Come in Primary and Secondary Forms 447 Sometimes Emotions Are Meta-Emotions 449 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 419 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 450 Communication Behaviors and Deception 419 Detecting Deception Is Difficult 419 Some Behaviors Are Common During Acts of Deception 420 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 424 Detecting Lies in Different Contexts 424 Familiarity Affects Detection Success 424 Expressive People Are Better Liars 424 Culture Matters, but Only Sometimes 425 Motivation Doesn’t Always Help 426 Suspicion May Not Improve Detection Ability 426 Noninteractive Contexts Are Best for Detection 427 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 428 Master the Chapter 428 Chapter Outline and Summary 428 Key Terms 430 Discussion Questions 430 Practice Quiz 430 Research Library 431 12 Emotion 433 Emotion in Interpersonal Communication 435 Influences on Emotional Experience and Expression 450 Culture 450 Display Rules 451 Technology 452 Emotional Contagion 453 Sex and Gender 453 Personality 455 Emotional Intelligence 456 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 457 Emotional Communication Skills 458 Identifying Emotions 458 Reappraising Negative Emotions 460 Accepting Responsibility for Emotions 460 Separating Emotions from Actions 461 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 461 Master the Chapter 462 Chapter Outline and Summary 462 Key Terms 464 Discussion Questions 464 Practice Quiz 464 Research Library 465 Glossary G-1 Endnotes N-1 What Is an Emotion? 435 Joyful/Affectionate Emotions: Happiness, Love, Passion, and Liking 436 Hostile Emotions: Anger, Contempt, Disgust, Jealousy, and Envy 438 Sad/Anxious Emotions: Sadness, Depression, Grief, Fear, and Social Anxiety 441 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 443 CONTENTS flo06643_FMppi-xixID3.indd ix ix 10/15/08 10:27:57 AM } Index Note: page references with an n indicate an endnote, page references with an f indicate a figure, page references with a t indicate a table Abdel-Azim, E., 186n46 abdominoplasty, 245 Abelson, R., 191n60 Abernethy, A.P., 283n46 Aboud, F.E., 131, 299n32 abstract words, 172 abusive relationships, 58, 306–307 academic achievement, self-esteem and, 97 accent, speech, 229 acceptance, in grieving proves, 442 accommodating (confl ict management strategy), 397, 399, 400 accuracy, perceptual, 127–131, 154–155 acronyms, as a mnemonic device, 265 action model of communication, 15 action tendencies, 445 action-oriented listening style, 270 actions, separating emotions from, 461 acts of dissimulation, 417–418 acts of simulation, 417 Adams, G.R., 298n21 Adams, R.G., 329 adaptability, of competent communicators, 31 adaptors, 224 Adelman, M.B., 322n82 ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), 273 Adler, K., 409n3, 409n4 Adolphs, R., 442n53, 448n76 adoption, families formed by, 355, 356, 357 advertising messages, 272, 278 advising (listening response), 266–267 affect displays, 223–224 affection defined, 182 expressed with language, 182–184 need for, 99–100 affectionate behavior, 73–74 affectionate touch, 224–225 affi liation behaviors gender differences in, 72–73 nonverbal behaviors and, 238, 242 Afifi, W., 315 Africa See country names in Africa African societies notion of beauty in tribal cultures, 298 perceptual set and, 139 aggression confl ict and, 381–382 passive, 385 self-esteem and, 96 while driving, 438, 439 aggressive touch, 226 { Agne, R., 114n102 agreeableness, 455–456 Ahuvia, A., 322n82 Akert, R.M., 221n20 Alaimo, K., 127n17 Albert, F., 444n58 Albert, R.D., 50n26 Alberts, J.K., 187n50, 351n59 Albright, M., 392 alcohol use, 338, 382 Alcoholics Anonymous, 113 Alexander, S.C., 283n46 alexithymia, 456–457 Alicke, M.D., 148n75 Allen, M., 113, 133n34 allness statements, 181 Alper, C.M., 295, 295n10 alphabet, Roman, 166 altercentric, 140 alternation, 366 Altman, I., 107 Amabile, T.M., 97n45 Amato, P.R., 340n23, 353n77, 371 Ambady, N., 49n22, 216n10 ambiguous language, 171 American Association of University Women, 98n60 American Bar Association, 356n80 American Beauty (film), 405 American College of Physicians, 324, 324n84 American Idol (television program), 215 American Psychiatric Association, 239n85, 273n31, 442n43 American Psychiatric Association Working Group, 58n42 American Sign Language, 166, 221f Amico, J., 446n69 Amish, naming practices of the, 177 Amunts, K., 442n52 amygdala, 442, 448 analyzing (listening response), 266–267 anchor-and-contrast persuasion strategy, 177–178 Andersen, J.E., 451n89 Andersen, P.A., 37, 49n20, 50n25, 124, 126n14, 255, 441n38, 448n78, 451n89, 465 Anderson, N., 141n58 Anderson, S.A., 359n86 Anderson, T.L., 343n37 Andrews, G.R., 28 androgyny, 58–59, 454 Angelou, M., 175 anger as a primary emotion, 448 defined, 438 downplaying expression of, 452 gender differences in experiencing, 453 health and, 438 identifying your, 458 in grieving process, 442 jealousy and, 440 negative benefits of, 446–447 self-directed, 438–439 anorexia nervosa, 244 Antje, V., 232n52 anxiety, 447 anxious and sad emotions, 441–443 appearance See physical appearance appreciative listening, 268 Apprentice, The (television program), 410 approach behaviors, 303 appropriate communication, 29–30 Arabic language, 173 Argyle, M., 128n24, 309n51, 313, 329 Aristotle, 275 Armstrong, B.G., 271n25 Arnold, R.M., 283n46 Arnott, J.L., 237n73, 237n75 Aron, A., 362, 362n92, 363 Aron, E., 363 Aronson, J., 133n32 arousal, nonverbal behaviors and, 238–239 arranged marriages, 339–340 articulation, vocal, 228–229 artifacts, use of, 233–235 Asada, K.J.K., 411n6 Asch, S., 135 ASD/AMD Merchandise Group, 184n40 asexuality, 63 Ashby, R., 191 Ashmore, M., 440n32 Ashmore, R.D., 236n62, 255 Asian Americans, self-esteem of, 98 Asians, stereotypes of, 133 See also country names of Asia assault, 226 assurances, relational maintenance and, 309 asthma, 102 Athenstaedt, U., 69n82 Atienza, A.A., 296n18 Atoum, A.O., 425n55 attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), 273 attraction See also physical attractiveness by appearance, 298–299 by complementarity, 300–301 by proximity, 299 by similarity, 299–300, 301 in close friendships, 318 interpersonal, 297 nonverbal messages sending messages of, 238 physical, 297 social, 297 task, 297–298 attraction theory, 297–301 attributions controllability dimension of, 143–144 defined, 143 for rudeness, 145t locus dimension of, 143 recognizing common errors in, 144–149 stability dimension of, 143 Attridge, G.G., 234n58 Aune, K., 243 Aune, R.K., 228n41, 243n121, 243n129, 246n136, 423n44 Austin, J.R., 240n90 Australia idioms used in, 53 individualistic culture in, 49 notion of beauty by tribal cultures in, 298 Australian Research Centre in Health, Sex, and Society, 61n54 Austria low-power-distance culture in, 50 masculine culture in, 51 authority, in high-power-distance vs low-power-distance cultures, 50–51 autism, self-monitoring ability and, 92 Automatic Data Processing, Inc., 410 autonomy face, 105, 106 autonomy-connection dialectical tension, 336, 366–367 average American family, 357 Avery, J.D., 240n99 avoidance behaviors, 303–304 avoiding (confl ict management strategy), 397, 399, 400 avoiding stage of relationship dissolution, 353 Avtgis, T.A., 343n37 awareness of self-concept, 91–94 of stereotyping, 134 Aylward, S.R., 422n39 Babel (film), 205 Babyak, M., 442n46 Bachelet, M., 393t Bachman, J.G., 338n11 Back, K.W., 299n33 backchanneling, 266 Bacue, A.E., 72n97, 344n41, 453n99 Baddeley, A.D., 136n42 Bagby, R.M., 456n133, 456n134, 456n135 Bailey, J.M., 63n60 Bailey, M., 240n97 Bakas, T., 226n32 balance (dialectical tensions), 366 Baldwicz, T.T., 442n46 Baldwin, J.R., 161 Ball, S.A., 271n27 Balleweg, B.J., 262n10 Bandura, A., 188n57 Bangladesh, self-esteem/happiness correlation in, 96t Banse, R., 216n12, 217 Barbato, C.A., 7n10 Barber, N., 298n22 bargaining, in grieving process, 442 Barker, L., 261n4 Barker, L.A., 341n34 Barker, L.L., 289 Barnett, O.W., 381n12 Barrett, L.F., 458n141 Barsade, S.G., 453n96, 456n125 Bartlett, M.Y., 454n109 Bartoshuk, L., 127n18 Basow, S., 69n84 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-1 I-1 10/15/08 10:28:20 AM Basuroy, S., 229n47 Bate, B., 64n67 battery, 226 battle fatigue, 187 Bauchner, J., 421–422 Bauer, G.B., 199n65 Bauer, T.N., 135n39 Baumeister, R.F., 8n14, 37, 96n36, 96n38, 96n41, 97n54, 97n55, 99n65, 119, 293, 293n3 Baumesiter, R.A., 97n53 Baumgardner, A.H., 97n43, 119 Bavelas, J.B., 180n31, 205, 236n64 Baxter, J., 351n64 Baxter, L.A., 26n34, 37, 336n2, 360–361, 361n89, 366n96, 371 Beals, K.P., 386n33 Beatty, M.J., 6, 29n39, 90n18 Beauchaine, T.P., 341n33 beauty, cultural differences in notion of, 298 See also physical attractiveness beauty is in the eye of the beholder, 218, 220 beauty is only skin deep, 298 Beavin, J., 17n23, 18n25 Bechara, A., 448n72 Beck, G., 187 Beckman, H.B., 22n33 Beers, 456n117, 456n123 behavior affectionate, 73–74 affi liative, 72–73, 238, 242 approach, 303 avoidance, 303–304 confl ict as a, 375 during deceptive acts, 420–423 explained through attributions, 143–148 nonverbal (see nonverbal behavior) positive (see positive behaviors) problematic, during confl ict, 395–397, 398 social differences in emotions and, 446 social, self-esteem and, 95–96 touch (see touch behaviors) vocal (see vocal behaviors) behavioral component to emotions, 445 Bejllovec, R.A., 353n73 Bell, D.B., 294n5 Bellezza, F.S., 265n19 Bem, S.L., 58n44, 66 Benjamin, E.J., 438n21 Bennett, A., 435 Bennett, S., 240n95 Benoit, S.S., 265n18 Bent, T., 240n97 Benton, D., 447n70 Benvenuto, M., 458n141 Berg, C., 381n5 Bergan, J., 224n25 Bergdahl, J., 42n3 Berger, C., 302 Berger, E.A., 130n28 Bergson, H.L., 123 Berkanovic, E., 296n17 Berman, M.I., 454n111 Bernstein, E.D., 191n62 Bernstein, I., 147–148, 149 Berntson, G.G., 7n5, 438n17 Berry, J.W., 59n46 Berscheid, E., 232n53, 298n23, 437n12 I-2 Bettinger, M., 339n18 Bettinghaus, E.P., 243n124 Beula-Casal, G., 127n16 Beutler, L.E., 224n25 Bhaskarananda, S., 446n66 bias confirmation, 279 speaker’s credibility affected by, 281 Bickman, L., 242n109, 242n110 Biddle, J.E., 243n126 Big Brother (television program), 410 biological aspects of communication, biological rhythm, 128 biological sex anatomical differences affecting, 61 confl ict and, 385–386 defined, 60 friendships and, 313–315 genetic differences affecting, 60–61 perceptual accuracy and, 129–130 perceptual bias and, 151 psychological differences affecting, 60 self-esteem and, 98 use of term, 56 biology, personality and, 87 see also genetics Bippus, A.M., 460n144, 465 Birdwhistell, R.L., 213n4 Birk, T., 228n42, 242n113 bisexuality defined, 63 disclosing sexual orientation of, 102, 104 open relationships and, 339 statistics on, 63 Bishop, J., 95n35 Bitner, M.J., 322n83 Black, A., 180n31, 205 Blacker, L., 336n4 Blackless, M., 61n51 Blake, R., 397 Blakeslee, S., 354n79 blamer role in family, 360 Blandford, A., 453n92, 453n93 Blankenship, V., 451 Bleil, M.E., 438n22 blended families, 357, 360 Bleske-Rechek, A.L., 317n71 Blier, M.J., 453n101 Blier-Wilson, L.A., 453n101 Blieszner, R., 7n13, 329 blind area of Johari Window, 84 blindness, 192, 212 blinking, deceptive communication and, 422 Block, J., 86n7, 144n65 Bluemountain.com, 184 Blumenthal, J.A., 442n46 Boatwright, P., 229n47 Boburka, R.r., 453n98 Boca, S., 436n9 Bochner, S., 394n55 Bodenhausen, G.V., 265n16 body image, 90–91 body movement deceptive behavior and, 246, 423 gender differences in, 71 body, emotions and, 442, 458 Bogaert, A.F., 63n63 Bogaerts, S., 456n136 Bohning, D.E., 442n48 Boiarsky, G.A., 271n25 Bolt, D., 192–193, 193 Bond, C.F., 425n54, 425n55, 426n57, 427n61 bonding stage of romantic relationships, 345 Bono, Edward de, 150 Bono, J.E., 99n64 Bonser, R.N., 425n54 Bonta, J., 5n1, 294n4 Booth, A., 338n9 Boothroyd, L.G., 227n36 Boren, J.P., 351n69 Bouchard, T.J., 87n12, 88 Boucher, J.D., 216n9 Bowers, J.W., 105n81 Bowker, J., 64n67 Boyatzis, R., 456n130 Brackett, M.A., 456n124, 456n127 Bradac, J.J., 71n89, 181n34 Bradbury, T.N., 142n59, 382n18 Bradley, A.C., 242n120 Bradlow, A.R., 240n97 Brady, R.M., 242n111 Braille, 166 Braithwaite, C., 232 Braithwaite, D.O., 37, 232, 360–361, 398n63 Brassington, G.S., 296n18, 438n24 Braverman, J., 454n109 Brazil high-power-distance culture in, 50 idioms used in, 53 manipulation/mutilation of body in, 298 self-esteem/happiness correlation in, 96t Breach (film), 431 Bread and Roses (film), 79 breadth of self-disclosure, 108f, 109–110 Break-Up, The (film), 269, 277 breakdown in communication, 21 Bringle, R.G., 339n15, 339n20 British Council, 169n7 Brocklenhurst, J., 106n83 Broome, B.J., 263n12 Brown, B.B., 234n57 Brown, J.D., 85n3 Brown, P., 171 Brown, R., 133n29, 392n46 Brown, T.A., 443n56 Brown, T.J., 243n128 Brownell, J., 20n30, 262n8, 264, 264n15, 289 Browning, E.B., 338 Bruce, V., 127n15 Bryant, S., 191n61 Bryson, B., 171n10, 205 Buchanan, T., 442n53 Buck, D.K., 265n19 Buck, P.S., 444 Buck, R., 37 Buckley, H.M., 241n104 Buddhists, 45 Budreau, D.R., 138, 138f, 138n46 Buhrmester, D., 95n34, 261n7 Bukowski, W.M., 329 bulimia nervosa, 244, 245 Buller, D.B., 228n41, 236n63, 239n84, 243n121, 246n136, 420n27, 420n28, 423n44, 423n47, 426, 427n62, 431 Bullis, C., 26n34 Bully (film), 306 Burgener, S., 226n32 Burger, J.M., 178n27 Burgoon, J.K., 72n97, 124n4, 213, 215n5, 224n25, 228n42, 229n45, 236n63, 239n83, 239n84, 240n87, 241n105, 241n106, 242n113, 242n116, 242n119, 246n138, 255, 420n28, 423n47, 424n48, 424n49, 426, 426n56, 426n58, 426n59, 427n62, 428n63, 431, 453n99 burial decisions, marriage benefits and, 342 Burleson, B.R., 32–33n47, 63n61, 64–65, 64n68, 65n70, 79 Burleson, M.H., 7n5 Burley-Allen, M., 289 Burrowes, B.D., 453n103 Bursik, K., 152n77 Bush, K.R., 336n3 Bushwick, B., 138n47 Buss, D.M., 317n71, 454n104, 454n107 Buss, R.R., 140n50 Butler, J., 190n59 Butler, L.M., 104n70, 129n26 Buttney, R., 133n30 Buunk, B.P., 98n63, 339n15, 339n20 Byham, W., 456n132 Byrne, D., 299n36 Cacioppo, J.T., 7n5, 381n6, 381n9, 396n59, 397n60, 405, 438n17, 465 Cahill, D.J., 320n75 Cahn, D.D., 381n10, 399n64 Cai, D.A., 49n19 Calabrese, R.J., 302, 302n41 Calero, H.H., 212n2 Campbell, C., 143n64 Campbell, J.D., 95n32, 96n38, 96n41, 97n53 Campbell, W.K., 145n66 Canada individualistic culture in, 49 low-context culture in, 49 low-power-distance culture in, 50 Canary, D.J., 67n72, 79, 308n48, 308n49, 315n67, 383n20, 384n24, 385n26 Cangemi, J., 396n58 Cano, M.C., 127n16 Caplan, S.E., 32–33n47 caregiving touch, 225–226 Carell, S., 247 Carlson, G.E., 216n9 Carlson, J., 250n146 Carlton, k., 383n22 Carr, D., 91n23 Carrell, L.J., 262n9, 289 Carroll, L., 240n89 Carroll, M.D., 91n22 Carstensen, L.L., 349n55 Caruso, D.R., 456n126 Castro, C.A., 451n90 Catch Me If You Can (film), 102, 119 Cate, R.M., 305n46, 382n16 Caughlin, J.P., 182n36, 183, 205, 286, 361n91, 371, 386n29 Cegala, D., 344n39 celibacy, 63 cell phones, 23 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 61, 92 certain statements, 281, 281f, 282 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-2 10/15/08 10:28:20 AM Chabert, Lacey, 19 Chadwick, P., 146n68 Chandra, A., 63n62 change, in self-concept, 86 channel-lean contexts, 16 channel-rich context, 16 channels, communication, 12, 15, 214 See also nonverbal communication; verbal communication Chapman, A.J., 239n82 Charuvastra, A., 61n51 chat rooms, 299 Chaudhary, B.S., 295n11 Chawla, A.J., 442n45 Chee, M., 405 Chelsey, N., 23 Chelune, G.J., 112n97 Chemistry.com, 344 Chen, G.M., 57, 264n14 Chen, J.B., 352n72 Cherlin, A., 353n75 children egocentrism in, 140 eye contact and deception in, 422 in individualistic cultures, 48 no-touch policies on, 225 of divorce, 353–354 personality traits in, 89 straight-forward comments by, 409 Children of a Lesser God (film), 255 Chile, 51, 393t China affect displays used in, 224 primary emotions in, 448 spousal choice in, 340 Chinese Americans, 450 Chiu, W.T., 443n56 Chivers, M.L., 63n60 Chovil, N., 205 Christensen, H., 182n37 Christensen, M., 165n1 Christensen, T., 458n141 Christopher, F.S., 382n16 chronemics, 233 Chung, J., 264n14 Cialdini, R.B., 178n28 circumscribing stage of relationship dissolution, 352 civil unions, 170 clarity of language, 170–172 Clark, H., 393t Clark, R.A., 68n77 Clarke, S., 275n38 Classen, C.C., 442n47 Clements-Nolle, K., 60n49 clichés, 180 clients, social relationships with, 322–323 clinical depression, 442 Clinton, B., 394 closed-mindedness, 274–275 closedness-openness dialectical tension, 336–337 clothing See dress co-cultures bases of, 45 communicating between, 46–47 deaf, 45–46 defined, 45 emotional expression and, 451 perceptual accuracy influenced by, 128–129 sociocultural impressions and, 240–241 co-workers see also workplace confl ict with, 383 identifying emotions toward, 458 interdependence among, 335 social relationships with, 320–321 Coakley, C., 228n40, 289 Coates, L., 236n64 Coats, E.J., 73n101, 424n50, 453n102 Cody, M.J., 178n29, 243n124 coercive power, 391 cognitive complexity, 32–33 cognitive component to emotions, 444–445 cohabitation privileges, marriage and, 342 Cohen, S., 7n6, 295, 295n10, 296n15 Cole, S.W., 104n72, 104n73 Cole, T., 411n7 Coleman, D., 31n44 Coleridge, S.T., 311, 324 collaborating (confl ict management strategy), 397, 399–400 collateral damage, 188 collectivistic cultures accommodation in, 399 defined, 49 emotional expression in, 450 handling confl ict in, 387 identity in, 87 language and, 172 listening and, 264 values of, 49 college campuses, discrimination against Muslims at, 43 college students group dating among, 344 time spent on listening, 260 Collins, S.A., 243n130 color, 234–235 colored, 192 Coltrane, S., 309n53, 351n61 commercial dating sites, 344 commitment defined, 333 emotional, 333 in bonding stage of romantic relationships, 345 legal and financial, 333, 335 obsession and, 334 social, 333 communication See also interpersonal communication “breakdown” in, 21 about communication, 18 amount of, vs effectiveness of, 22–24 deceptive (see deception) gender differences in, 63–65 improving, 362–367 in families, 359–361 models of (See models of communication) nonverbal (See nonverbal communication) power influencing, 389–390 self-assessment of skills in, 20 six characteristics of, 15–20 communication codes, 53–54 communication competence, 29–33 characteristics of competent communicators, 30–33 communicating appropriately, 29–30 communicating effectively, 29 defined, 29 communication myths, 20–24 communication privacy management (CPM) theory, 348 communication, needs met through identity, 8–9 instrumental needs, 9–10 physical, 5–7 relational, 7–8 spiritual needs, comparing oneself to others, 8, 90–91, 440–441 comparison level, 305, 306, 307 comparison level for alternatives, 305, 306, 307 competence face, 105 competing (confl ict management strategy), 397, 398, 400 competitive interrupting, 275 complementarity, attraction by, 300–301 complementary relationships, 389–390, 391 compromising (confl ict management strategy), 397, 399, 400 computer-mediated formats See online communication computer role in family, 360 confirmation bias, 279 confirming messages, 362–363 confl ict See also interpersonal confl ict can be beneficial, 383 family roles in, 360 handled constructively, 364–365 handled directly vs indirectly, 380 harm from, 380–382 lies to help you avoid, 415 power and, 388–395 romantic relationships differing in how they handle, 346, 347–348 confl ict-avoiding couples, 347 Conger, J.C., 129n27 connection-autonomy dialectical tension, 336, 366–367 connotative meaning as cause for contention, 170 defined, 168 Semantic Triangle and, 169 Constantine, L.L., 358n85 constructive management of confl ict, 383 Conte, F.A., 61n51 contempt, 396, 439–440 content dimension of confl ict, 379 content dimension of the message, 17, 18 content-oriented listening style, 270, 276 context channel-lean, 16 channel-rich, 16 defined, 12 in transaction model of communication, 13 interaction model of communication, 12–13 words used in, 190 context-specific, power as, 389, 391 continuer statements, 282–283 control, need for, 98–99 control/power touch, 226 controllability dimension of attribution, 143–144, 145t conversation ending, 236–237 nonverbal communication in, 235–237 turn-taking signals in, 236 Cook, K.S., 307n47 Cool Hand Luke (film), 21 Cooley, C.H., 8n19 Cooley, Charles Horton, 89 Coontz, S., 340–341, 340n26 Cordova, J.V., 249n52, 349n53 Corneille, O., 147n71, 147n72 Cornwell, R.E., 227n36 Cossman, E.J., 362 costs equity theory of relationship formation and, 307 of social relationships, 296–297, 304–305, 307 relationship maintenance and, 310 Côté, S., 453n95, 456n117, 456n123 Courtenay, W., 58n38 Cox, L., 176n21 Craighead, W.E., 442n46 Crane, D.R., 128n20 Crash (film), 142, 161 credibility, 179–182 allness statements, 181 choosing language for, 181–182 clichés, 180 critical listening and, 280–281 defined, 179 dialects, 180 equivocation, 180–181 nonverbal behavior projecting, 242 weasel words, 181 Critelli, J.W., 97n51 critical listening, 267, 268 becoming better at, 280–282 probability and, 281–282 skepticism and, 280 speaker’s credibility and, 280–281 criticism defined, 396 handling confl ict poorly and, 396 in high vs low-context cultures, 49–50 Crocker, J., 98, 98n57, 98n58, 98n59, 98n61 Croghan, T.W., 442n45 cross-cultural aspects of physical attractiveness, 299 Crowley, A., 424 Crowley, M., 221n19 Crusco, A.H., 242n117 cultural assumptions, 46 cultural awareness, communicating with, 46–47 cultural differences, 47–55 high vs low-context cultures, 49–50 in achieving beauty, 298–299 in communication codes, 53–54 in gender roles, 59–60 individualism vs collectivism, 48–49 low vs high-power distance cultures, 50–51 macsuline vs feminine cultures, 51–52 monochronic vs polychronic cultures, 52 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-3 I-3 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM cultural differences (continued) spatial use and, 231 uncertainty avoiding vs uncertainty accepting cultures, 52–53 cultural euphemisms, 187 cultural sensitivity, quiz on, 57 culture(s) accommodation and, 399 acquiring, 42–44 appropriate listening responses and, 267 beliefs on elders/superiors and, 40 co-cultures (see co-cultures) collectivistic (see collectivistic cultures) communicating appropriately and, 30 components of, 44–45 confl ict and, 386–387 defined, 41 detecting deception within your, 425–426 development of romantic relationships and, 345 emotional expression and, 450–451 emotions and, 446, 448 eye behaviors and, 221–222 facial expressions interpreted similarly across different, 215–216 gender, 63–64 identified through a person’s voice, 241 in-group/out-group distinction, 42 individualistic (see individualistic cultures) influence of, 40 language is bound by, 172–173 listening behavior and, 263–264 naming practices and, 176–177 nonverbal communication and, 208, 249 notion of beauty and, 220 perception and, 152 perceptual accuracy influenced by, 128, 151 perceptual set influencing, 138–139 power and, 394–395 self-concept influenced by, 87 self-disclosure influenced by, 112 sociocultural impressions and, 240–241 Cummins, R.A., 140n53 Cupach, W.R., 29n41, 37, 105n82, 119, 334, 353n73, 385n26 Curran, J.P., 233n54 Curtis, D.B., 261n5, 261t Curtis, G.C., 442n50 Cusella, K.P., 114n102 cyberspace See online communication cyberstalking, 334 Czech language, 173 D’Agostino, R.B., 438n21 Dabbs, J.M., 227n37 Dallinger, J., 69n85 Daly, J.A., 37, 181n33 Daly, M., 300n38 Damasio, A.R., 442n53, 448n72 Dannemiller, J.L., 138, 138n46 I-4 dark side of interpersonal communication See interpersonal communication, negative side of Darley, J.M., 148n76 Dasen, P.R., 59n46 dating, 344 online, 414 Davidoff, J., 235n59 Davidson, R.J., 237n70, 460n142 Davis, K.E., 126n12 Davis, K.L., 185n44 Davis, M., 246n134, 442n54 Davis, M.C., 104n76 de Bono, Edward, 150 de Jong-Gierveld, J., 294n6 de Jong-Meyer, R., 444n57 de-intesification (display rule), 452 Dead Man Walking (film), 289 deaf population co-culture of, 45–46 focus on visual cues by, 211–212 person-first terminology and, 192 speaking to, through interpreter, 135–136 Deans, B., 188n54 Dear, K.B.G., 182n37 Deary, I.J., 456n122 death, euphemisms as a way to talk about, 187 DeBruine, L.M., 227n36 deception, 408–428 acts of dissimulation, 417–418 acts of simulation, 417 as common, 413–414 basic elements of, 412–413 behaviors common during, 420–423 body movement and, 423 defined, 409, 410, 412–413 detecting, 419–420, 424–428 distress of being lied to and, 418 example of, 408 eye behavior and, 422 getting to know your attitudes about, 416 high-stake lies, 410–411 inconsistent information and, 420 interactive context of, 427 low-stake lies, 411 middle-stakes lies, 411 motivations for, 415–417 nature of, 409–410 noninteractive context of, 427–428 nonverbal behaviors and, 244–246 online, 414 politeness and, 413–414 smiling and, 245, 422–423 speech errors and, 420–421 vocal pitch and, 246–247, 421–422 decode, 12 defamation language, 189–190 defensiveness, 397 Degirmencioglu, S.M., 299n35 Del Prete, T., 225, 225n29 demand-withdraw pattern, 386 demographic impressions, 240 denial, 366, 442 DeNiro, R., 101 Denmark immigration policies, 42 low-power-distance culture in, 50 denotative meaning as cause for contention, 170 defined, 168 Semantic Triangle and, 169 DePaulo, B., 220n18, 246n137, 419n24, 420n30, 421n34, 421n38, 426 depression defined, 442 eating disorders and, 245 feminine gender role and, 58 gender differences in experiencing, 453 in grieving process, 442 nonverbal behaviors and, 239 perceptual inacurracy of people with, 129 sadness vs., 442 self-esteem and, 85, 96 treating, 442 depth of self-disclosure, 108f, 109–110 Deregowski, J.B., 139f Derlega, V.J., 103, 104n77, 112n92, 114n104, 119, 320n77, 329 Derryck, A., 61n51 Deshpande, S., 96n42 Desmet, M., 456n136 DeSteno, D., 454n109 deTruck, M.A., 239n84 Deutch, F.M., 351n65, 351n68 Deys, C.B., 314n62 diabetes, 102 dialectical tensions, 335–337, 365–367 dialects, 180 Dias, M., 440n31 DiCaprio, L., 102 Dickinson, E., 106n83 Dickinson, S.L., 381n8 Diener, D., 96t Diener, E., 8n16, 96t Diener, M., 96t Diesel, C.A., 181n33 Dietrich, M., 297 differentiating stage of relationship dissolution, 352 Dillard, J.P., 268n24 Dillman, L., 242n119 DiLorenzo, T.M., 296n18 DiMatteo, M.R., 96n39, 250n145 Dindia, K., 65n71, 79, 112n95, 112n98, 113, 260, 260n3, 349n51 Diogo, L., 393t Dion, K.K., 232n53, 243n123, 298n23, 340n22 Dion, K.L., 340n22 direct confl ict, 380 Direct Marketing Association, 273 direct perception checking, 155 disabilities euphemisms as a way to talk about, 187 person-first language and, 192 physical proximity with people with, 232 disagreement, confl ict vs., 375 discretion, lying and, 409 discrimination against Muslim students, 43 against sexual minorities, 102, 104 defined, 130 misperception of marginalized populations, 130, 131 self-esteem and racial, 98 disgust, 440, 446, 448 disinhibition effect, 115, 387 disorientation, 366 display rules, 451–452 divorce defined, 353 effect of, 353–354 expectations regarding, 341 in arranged marriages, 340 reasons for increase in, 353 Dobos, J.A., 90n18 Dole, E., 388 domestic partnerships, 170, 341, 356 domestic violence protection, 342 dominance, nonverbal behaviors asserting, 238 Donahue, W.A., 388n42 Dopp, J.M., 381n7 Doraiswamy, M., 442n46 Doris, J.M., 148n76 Dotting, D.I., 451n90 doublespeak, 188 Douglas Creed, W.E., 240n90 Down syndrome, 102 Doyle, W.J., 7n6, 295 Draft, R.L., 16n22 Dragnet (television program), 153 Dreger, A.D., 61n53 Dreschler, W.A., 273n33 dress as channel of communication, 15 credibility and, 242 nonverbal communication through, 211 sociocultural impressions formed through, 241 Drevland, G.C.B., 420n26 Driver, R.E., 422 Drucker, Peter F., 11 drug use, 7, 338 Drummond, K., 236n65 Duan, C., 268n23 Dubitsky, T.M., 242n115 Duck, S., 352n71 Dunahee, J., 226n32 Dunbar, N.E., 428n63 Duncan, G., 338n10 Duncan, S., 266n20 Dunlop, L., 440n32 Dupuis, S., 140n56 Dutilleux, J.P., 298n25 dyad, 25 Dykstra, P.A., 294n6 Dyle, W.J., 295n10 e-cards, 184 e-mail emotional expression in, 213f, 452 hate speech through, 191 Eagley, A.E., 236n62, 255 Eagley, A.H., 221n19 Eaker, E.D., 438n21 Eakins, B.W., 72n94 Eakins, R.G., 72n94 EAR (electronically activated recorder), 69 eating disorders, 58, 91, 244, 245 Eaton, W.W., 442n50 Ebesu, A., 424n48, 426n58, 426n59 Ebling, R., 451n86 Edison, M., 143n62 Edman, P., 421n35, 423n45 Edmondson, C.B., 129n27 Edson, Belle, 177, 177n23, 205 Edwards, R., 261n4 effective listening barriers to, 269, 271–275, 277 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-4 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM defined, 259 importance of, 260–262 stages of, 264–267 effectiveness, communication, 29 Efran, M.G., 233n55 Egan, G., 267n21 Egland, K.I., 314n63 egocentrism, 140 eHarmony.com, 344 Ehly, S., 97n50 Ekman, P., 215, 216n8, 220n17, 245n131, 245n132, 246n133, 248n140, 416n21, 423n42, 448, 449, 451 elderly, the context of communication and, 14 importance of friends to, 28 interpersonal communication improving health of, 27 teenager’s co-culture vs., 46–47 electronic communication See online communication electronically activated recorder (EAR), 69 Elfenbein, H.A., 216n10 Elison, J., 446n67 Elliott, A.J., 145n66, 436n5 Elliott, D., 129n26 Ellis, H.D., 218n14 Ellis, K., 363n93 Ellison, N.B., 414n16 Ellsworth, P., 220n17 Eloy, S.V., 228n41 Emanuel, E.J., 197n63 embarrassment, 449 emblems, 223 Embrick, D.G., 61n51 Emde, R.N., 237n74 Emergy, B.C., 381n11, 382n17 Emerson, R.W., 235 Emery, B.C., 381n13 Emery, R.E., 341n34 Emmert, P., 259n2 emotion(s), 434–461 accepting responsibility for, 460–461 anger (see anger) as physiological, 444 behavioral component to, 445 categories of, 436 cognitive component to, 444–445 contempt, 396, 439–440 culture and, 446, 448 defined, 435 depression (see depression) disgust, 440, 446, 448 display rules on, 451–452 envy, 440–441 examples of, 435 expressed in e-mails, 213f, 388 expressed through electronic communication, 212f facial behaviors and, 219–221, 237 fear (See fear) grief, 284, 442 happiness (see happiness) hostile, 438–441 identifying, 458–460 jealousy, 440, 452–453, 454 joyful and affectionate, 436–438 liking, 437 love (see love) meta-emotions, 449–450 mood vs., 435 nonverbal communication and, 213–214, 215–216 passion, 437, 444–445 primary, 447–448 reappraising negative, 460 sad and anxious, 441–443 sadness (see sadness) secondary, 448–449 separated from actions, 461 social anxiety, 443 socially contagious, 453 varying in intensity, 447 varying in valence, 446–447 vocal cues used to understand, 216 vocal expressions of, 217, 237–238 emotional closeness, 294 emotional commitment, 333 emotional contagion, 453 emotional expression cultural differences in, 450–451 display rules on, 451–453 emotional contagion and, 453 emotional intelligence and, 456–457 facial behaviors and, 215–216, 219–221, 237 gender and, 72–73, 453–455 online, 212f, 452–453 personality and, 455–456 romantic relationships varying in how they handle, 349–350 emotional infidelity, 454 emotional intelligence, 96, 456–457 emotional jealousy, 454 emotional reappraisal, 460 emotional release, through selfdisclosure, 112–113 emotional rewards, 293 emotional support, from social relationships, 294 empathic concern, 268 empathic listening, 267, 268 acknowledging feelings in, 282–283 becoming better at, 282–285 by physicians, 283–284 during times of grief, 284 nonjudgmental, 282 responding with, 266 empathy, 31–32 employment See workplace encode, 11 encouragement, from social relationships, 294 enculturation, 43 Eng, P.M., 438n23 England, P., 338n10 Engle, D., 224n25 Entourage (television show), 59 enunciation, 228 envy, 440–441 Epstein, N., 32 Epstein, R., 414n15 Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC), 323 equity theory, 307–308, 310 equivocal language, 180–181 equivocation, 418 Erbert, L.A., 383, 383n23, 384, 405 Erchul, W.P., 389n44 Erez, A., 99n64 Ericson, P.M., 389, 389n43 Ernst, J.M., 7n5 Espinoza-Fernandez, L., 127n16 ethics, of competent communicator, 33 Ethiopia, 298 ethnic minorities See minority groups euphemisms, 187–188 euthanasia, 197 evaluating stage in effective listening, 266 exaggeration, lying through, 417 excitement, 449 experience, expertise vs., 281 experimenting stage of romantic relationships, 344 expert power, 391–392 expertise, experience vs., 281 explicit communication rules, 19–20 expressing nonverbal messages, 249–250 expressive talk deception and, 424–425 defined, 67 gender and, 67–68 expressive writing, 184–185 extended families, 357–358 external causes of behavior, 143, 146, 147 Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (television program), 215 extroversion, 456 eye behaviors, 221–222 eye contact avoiding, 303–304 conversation and, 236 credibility and, 242 deaf co-culture and, 46 deceptive communication and, 422 empathic listening and, 285 listening and, 267 face, 105 face needs, 105 face threats, 106 face-threatening acts, 105–106 Facebook, 299, 344, 453 facework, 105 facial behaviors, 209 as channel of communication, 15 conveying same emotions across cultures, 215–216 deception and, 245 empathic listening and, 285 in American Sign Language, 221 in transaction model of communication, 13 meta-communication through, 217 symbolic meaning of, 165 facial displays, 218–221 see also facial behaviors defined, 218 emotion conveyed through, 219–221, 237 person’s identity through, 218 role in physical attractiveness, 218–219 factual claims, opinions vs., 195–197 Fahey, J., 104n73 Fahey, J.L., 381n7 false smiles, 245, 422–423 falsification, lie through, 417 families as systems, 358–359 average American, 357 cell phones and, 23 communication in, 359–361 dialectical tensions in, 336 elements of, 355–356 emphasizing positivity in, 362–363 importance of, 354–355 interdependence in, 333, 335 legal and financial commitments in, 333, 335 patriarchal, 392 types of, 356–358 family of origin, 356–357 family of procreation, 356–357 family rituals, 360–361 family roles, 360 family secrets, 361 family stories, 361 Farinelli, L., 185n44 Farwell, L., 128n25 fast speakers, 228 Father Knows Best (television show), 59 Faulkner, S.L., 315, 315n65 Fausto-Sterling, A., 61n51 fear action tendency associated with, 445 as a primary emotion, 448 defined, 442 forms of, 447 jealousy and, 440 physiological response to, 442, 444–445 feedback content dimension of, 18 defined, 12 from listening, 266 in pseudolistening, 271 in transaction model of communication, 13 interaction model of communication, 12 feelings, acknowledged in empathic listening, 282 See also emotion(s) Fein, O., 422n40 Feinberg, D.R., 227n36 Feingold, A., 186n49 Feld, S.L., 317n73 Feldman, R.S., 73n101, 408n1, 415n20, 424n50, 425n53, 453n102 Felinger, M., 90n17 fellowship face, 105, 106 Felmlee, D., 393n53 female heads of state, 392, 393t feminine cultures, 51 femininity affectionate behavior and, 73–74 defined, 58 emotional expression and, 454 overview, 58 self-concept and, 87 Fernald, P.S., 262n10 Fernandez, A.M., 454n105 Ferrara, M., 421 Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (film), 227 Festinger, L., 299n33 Fiedler, F.E., 321n80 Field, T.M., 7n4, 225, 225n27, 225n30, 225n31, 231, 231n48, 255 Fields, B., 453n92, 453n93 figurative language, thinking about confl ict using, 376–377 filler words, 228 final impressions, 136 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-5 I-5 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM finances, as source of confl ict, 383–384 financial commitments, 333, 335 Fink, E.L., 49n19 Finland, 392, 393t Finscham, F.D., 142n59 Firestone, I.J., 242n114 First Amendment, 191 first impressions image management and, 101 misleading, 156 names influencing, 175 primacy effect governing, 134–136 Fisher, A.H., 453n97 Fiske, A.P., 293n2 Fiske, D.W., 266n20 Fiske, S.T., 125n10 Fitzmaurice, G., 438n23 Fitzpatrick, M.A., 345–346, 349n51, 371 Flannery, D., 140n50 Flegal, K.M., 91n22 fl irting, 238 Floyd, K., 7n12, 73–74n112, 73n107, 73n108, 73n109, 73n110, 74n114, 100n67, 100n68, 124n4, 138n48, 182n38, 184n39, 185n43, 185n44, 224n26, 229n45, 237n71, 238n77, 238n80, 240n87, 240n88, 241n105, 241n106, 242n116, 255, 285n47, 294n7, 298n24, 299n34, 300n39, 311n54, 314n58, 314n59, 329, 344n40, 358n84, 371, 420n32, 420n33, 422n41, 424n49, 426n56, 427n62, 437n16, 453n100, 454n114 Floyd, S., 381n10 Fonagy, I., 237n76 Ford, C.V., 431 Forrest, J.A., 415n20, 425n53 Forsheim, P., 381n5 Forsyth, D.R., 97n52 Foss, K.A., 177, 205 Foucault, M., 61n56 Foundation for Endangered Languages, 44n9 Four Horseman of the Apocalypse behaviors, 395–397, 398 Fox, N., 237n70 Franklyn-Stokes, A., 172n14 fraudulent lies, 411 Frazier, P.A., 454n111 Fredrickson, B.L., 73n106, 437n10 Freidrich, G.W., 236n66 French, J., 390 Fridlund, A.J., 237n68 Friedman, G., 72–73n99 Friedman, H.S., 250n144, 250n145 Friedman, M.A., 91n23 friendly fire, 187–188 friendly relations stage of friendships, 316 Friends (television show), 16–17 friendships as a relationship between equals, 312–313 as voluntary, 311–312 common characteristics of, 311 deception and, 424 dialectical tensions in, 336 differ by sex, 313–315 emotional closeness with, 294 forms of attraction in close, 318 I-6 governed by rules, 313 health rewards from, 295–296 importance of, to senior citizens, 28 in high-power-distance vs lowpower-distance cultures, 50 interdependence in, 335 investments in, 335 jealousy in, 440 life span of, 315–319 reasons for ending, 317–319 social exchange theory and, 305–306 types of, and communication, 26 Friesen, W.V., 215n7, 220n17, 245n131, 245n132, 248n140, 421n35, 423n45, 449, 451, 451n91 Frijda, N.H., 435, 445n61 Frongillo, E.A., 127n17 Frost, J., 414n14 Fuiman, M., 314n64 fundamental attribution error, 146–147 fundamental frequency, 227 Funder, D.C., 125n9, 144n65 Furman, W., 95n34 Furstenberg, F.F., 353n75 Future Shock (Toffler), 272 Fyock, J., 134n35 Gabriel, M.T., 97n51 Gagne, P., 60n50 Gaines, C., 261n4 gait, 222–223 Gallant, M.P., 296n19 Gallaudet University, 46 Gallois, C., 450n83 Gamm, B.K., 440n36 Gandhi, I., 395 Gardner, W.L., 438n17 Garfinkel, S., 414n12 Garlinger, P.P., 170n8, 170n9 Garwood, S.G., 176n21 gay men/relationships, 61 confl ict communication among, 347–348 disclosing sexual orientation of, 102, 104 expressive talk by, 68 open relationships among, 339 stigmatized, topics of confl ict among, 384 violent confl ict and, 381 ways of handling confl ict, 386 Gay, W.C., 70n86, 70n87 Gee, C.B., 349n52 gender See also biological sex; sexual orientation components of, 55–63 perceptual set regarding, 137 use of term, 56 gender cultures, 63–64 gender differences ability to decode facial displays of emotion, 220–221 affectionate behavior, 73–74 amount of time spent talking and, 69 confl ict and, 385–386 division of instrumental tasks and, 351 emotional experiences and, 453–454, 455 emotional intelligence and, 456 expressive vs instrumental talk, 67–68 expressive vs instrumental talk and, 67–68 health benefits of marriage and, 338–339 in emotional communication, 72–73 interrupting and, 275 linguistic styles, 71 listening styles and, 276 nonverbal communication and, 71–74 positions of power and, 392, 393t power and, 392–394 powerful forms of speech and, 68–70 powerful speech and, 68–70 reaction to marital conflict, 393–394 touch behavior, 71–72 use of emotion in communication, 212f verbal communication and, 67–71 voice pitch, 227 gender equality, culture and, 40, 41 gender roles androgynous, 58–59 changes in, 59 defined, 56 differing by culture, 59–60 emotional communication and, 73 emotional expression and, 454–455 feminine (see femininity) inequitable divisions of power and, 392 masculine (see masculinity) perceptual accuracy and, 129–130 self-concept and, 87 self-disclosure influenced by, 112 traditional expectations in, 56 use of term, 56 gendered communication, 63–65 gendered linguistic styles, 71 Gendreau, P., 5n1, 294n4 General Accounting Office, 356n81 generalizations stereotypes and, 133–134 weasel words and, 181 genetic ties in families, 355–356 genetics attraction by similarity and, 300 biological sex and, 60–61 personality and, 88 genuine smiles, 423 geography, emotional expression and, 451 George, L.J., 182n36, 183, 205 George, M.S., 442n48 Georgeson, M.A., 127n15 Gergen, K.J., 304n45 Germany female head of state in, 393t self-esteem/happiness correlation in, 96t gesticulation, 223 gestures, 211, 222–224 adaptors, 224 affect displays, 223–224 as channel of communication, 15 cultural differences in, 54 deceptive communication and, 246 emblems, 223 illustrators, 223 meta-communication through, 217 regulators, 224 symbolic meaning of, 165 getting to know yourself See quizzes Geurrero, L.K., 229n45 Gibbons, P., 71n89 Gibbs, J.L., 414n16 Gibran, K., 107 Gibson, M., 191 Gilbert, D.T., 420n29 Giles, H., 172n14, 180n30 Giles, L.C., 28 Gilovich, T., 279n40 Gilroy, P.J., 240n89 Girdler, S.S., 446n69 Girl Scout Law, 409 Givens, D.B., 238n79 giving feedback, 266 Gladney, G.A., 187n52 Gladney, K., 261n4 Glaser, R., 381n6, 381n8, 393n52, 397n60, 405, 438n25 glazing over, 273–274 Glonek, G.F., 28 Glser, R., 396n59 goals incompatible, confl ict and, 375–376 of communication with others, 193–194 Goddard, C., 446n64 Goethals, G.R., 147n70 Goffman, Erving, 7n7, 100, 105, 105n80 Goldberg, J.D., 295n11 Goldin-Meadow, S., 223n24 Goldman, N., 338n8 Goldschmidt, M.M., 100, 104, 119 Goldstein, E.B., 123n3, 124n6, 161 Goldstein, G.S., 262n10 Goleman, D., 456n128 Golen, S., 274, 274n32, 274n35, 274n37 Gombrich, E.H., 139f, 139n49 Good Will Hunting (fi lm), 329 Good, C., 133n32 Goodman, R.J., 177n26 Goodwin, C., 322n82 Goodwin, J., 449n80 Gordon, A., 73, 455 Gordon, A.H., 73n104, 73n105, 454n113, 465 Gordon, A.K., 409n3 Gordon, R.G., 44n7 Gosling, S.D., 99n66, 157 Gosselin, F., 442n53 gossip, 189–190 Gottlieb, B.H., 113n101 Gottman, J.M., 21n31, 73n106, 347, 347n46, 349n54, 349n55, 349n56, 349–350, 350n57, 363, 383n21, 386, 395, 395n56, 396, 397, 398, 405, 439n26, 440, 449n81, 450n82 Gouin, J.P., 438n25 Gouldner, A., 111 government, women holding positions of power in, 392, 393t Goverskeid, G., 420n26 Graham, M., 209 Grahe, E., 229n46 Grammer, K., 218n15 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-6 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM Gray, John, 63, 63n64, 63n65, 65, 74 Graziano, W.G., 456n118 Great Britain, individualistic culture in, 49 Greek language, 173 Green, B.L., 295n13 Green, M.C., 454n110 Green, P.R., 127n15 Greenbert, M.S., 304n45 Greenleaf, R., 319 Greenwald, A.G., 86n6 Greesey, M.E., 438n20 Gregg shorthand, 166 Gregory, R.L., 139n49 Greicius, M.D., 186n46 Gremler, D.D., 322n83 Grewal, D., 458n140 Grewen, K.M., 446n69 Grey’s Anatomy (television show), 59 grief, 284, 442 Griffi n, D.W., 140n55 Griffi n, J.L., 104n77 Grissom, P.F., 389n44 Gross, J., 73n106, 458n141 Gross, J.J., 460n143 Grossman, R.M., 296n16 group dating, 344 groups, spatial use in, 231–232 Gruenwald, T.L., 73n111 Grumach, M.M., 61n52 Gubrium, J.F., 89n15 Gudykunst, W.B., 87n14, 172n13, 387n36 Guerrero, L.K., 238n77, 240n87, 240n88, 241n105, 241n106, 255, 298n24, 420n32, 420n33, 422n41, 441n38, 441n42, 448n78, 453n98, 465 guilt, 449–450 Guinn, J.S., 86n5 Gumperz, J.J., 173n16 gunnysackinig, 396 Gunther, J., 129n26 Gunzburger, D., 240n94 Guring, R.A.R., 73n111 Gwaltney, J.M., 7n6 Gwinner, K.P., 322n83 Haaga, D.A.F., 85n4 Haas, E., 69n82 Habel, U., 442n52 Hadiks, D., 246n134 Hagedorn, L.S., 143n62 Hagstrom, F., 240n100 Haider, M., 271n26 Haidt, J., 438n18, 440n29, 440n30, 440n31, 440n32, 445n62 Hakim-Larson, J., 449n80 Halberstadt, A.G., 453n103 Hale, J.L., 239n84 Hall, A.E., Hall, E.T., 47–48, 49n21, 52n29, 52n30, 128n22, 231 Hall, J.A., 72–73n99, 215n6, 247n139 Hall, L.D., 351n62, 351n63 Hall, M.R., 52n29 Hall, T.J., 308n50 Hallam, M., 220 halo effect, 232, 244 Halonen, T., 393t Halsen, M., 294n8 Hamacheck, D., 92n24, 92n25 Hamermesh, D.S., 243n126 Hamilton, M.A., 181n32 Hamilton, W.D., 300n37 Han, M., 91n19 Han, M.S., 393t Hancock, J., 410 hand-shaking, 226 Hanna, M.P., 442n45 Hao, J., 240n100 Happ, B.R., 415n20, 425n53 happiness correlation with self-esteem, 96, 96t defined, 436 extroversion, 456 facial expressions conveying, 220 marital, most important predictor of, shared with others, 436–437 through social relationships, 294 haptics, 224 Harding, M.E., 375 Harlow, H., 225 Harper, A.M., 360–361, 361n89 Harris, I.D., 73n103 Harris, P.R., 79 Harris, R.M., 289 Hart, R.P., 236n66 Harvey, J.H., 143n60, 161 hate speech, 190–192 Hatfield, E., 437n14, 453n95, 465 Hause, K.S., 67n72 Haviland, J.M., 465 Hayakawa, A.R., 172n12 Hayakawa, S., 172 health alcohol use and, 382 anger and, 438 harmful consequences of confl ict and, 380–381 interpersonal communication improving, 27 listening and, 261 marriage and, 338–339 social interaction’s impact on, social relationships and, 295 suppressing emotions and, 458 hearing as stage in effective listening, 264–265 listening and, 258, 259, 262 words or statements that aren’t spoken, 278 Heatherton, T.F., 97n55 Hecht, M.A., 72n98 Hecht, M.L., 308n50, 335n1, 437n11 Heesink, J.A.M., 351n58, 351n60 Heffner, K.I., 393n52 Heinemann, W., 232n52 Heino, R.D., 414n16 Heisel, A.D., Helgeson, V.S., 113n101 Henderson, M., 309n51, 313, 329 Hendrick, C., 140n54 Hendrick, S.S., 140n54 Hendrix, K.G., 133n31 Henley, N., 68n79 Henton, J.M., 305n46, 382n16 Hergovitch, A., 90n17 Herman, S., 442n46 Herold, A., 68–69 Herz, R.S., 255 Hesketh, B., 394n55 Hess, U., 216n11 heterosexuality, 61 See also oppositesex romantic relationships Hetherington, E.M., 353n76, 354n78 Heyman, R.E., 362n92 Hidaka, Y., 104n74 hidden area of Johari Window, 83–84, 85 Higgins, E.T., 137n43 high self-monitors, 92 high-contact cultures, 231 high-context cultures, 49–50, 387 high-power distance cultures, 50–51, 394–395 high-stakes lies, 410–411, 426 Higher Education Research Institute, University of California, 9n20 higher self-esteem, 95, 96–97 Hill, C.E., 268n23 Hilton, B.A., 52n31 Hindu beliefs on primary emotions, 448 Hindu diet, 446 Hispanic Americans, self-esteem of, 98 Hitch, G., 136n42 HIV-positive disclosure of, 102, 103 stigma of, Hocker, J., 375 Hocker, J.L., 376n2, 399n65 Hockett, C.F., 167n3 Hoffmeister, R., 46n13 Hofstede, G., 47–48, 49n16, 49n18, 50n23, 50n24, 51, 52n27, 52n28, 53n32, 79 Hofstede, G.H., 60n47 Hofstede, G.J., 50n24, 51n27, 51n28 Hoge, C.W., 451n90 Hoijer, H., 173n17 Holcomb, R.K., 46n12 Holcomb, T.K., 46n12 Holley, F., 261n4 Hollien, H., 240n91 Holman, T., 347 Holmes, D., 4427n47 Holmes, J.G., 140n55, 382 Holstein, J.A., 89n15 homeless people, overattribution and, 148 more Homer, P.A., 243n122 Homo sapiens, 172 homosexuality, 61–62 See also gay men/relationships; lesbians/ lesbian relationships; samesex relationships Hoobler, G.D., 255 Hooley, J.M., 143n64 Hooven, C., 450n82 Hopi Indians, 173 Hopper, R., 236n65 Horne, L., 450 Hosman, L.A., 181n35, 205 hostile couples, 347 hostile emotions, 439–441 hostile work environment, 323 Hotel Rwanda (film), 465 House (television series), 233 House, A., 69n85 House, J.S., 295n12 household chores, as source of confl ict, 384 Houts, R.M., 182n36, 183, 205 how are you, 29–30 How to Read a Person like a Book, 212 Howard, K.I., 73n103 Howard, P.N., 234n56 Hsu, F.L.K., 340n25 Hubert, W., 444n57 Huckeba, J., 177n26 Huebner, D.M., 104n76 Hughes, M.E., 339n14 Hughes, P.C., 161 human interaction See social interaction human relationships See relationships Human Rights Campaign Foundation, 60n48 humor, 186–187 Humphries, T., 45n11 Hunsaker, F., 420n27 HURIER model of listening, 264–267 Hurst, S.A., 197n64 Huston, T.L., 182n36, 183, 205, 351n66 hyperpersonal communication, 110–111 I-statements, 198–200, 460–461 Ickes, W., 147, 148n74, 149 Ideal Husband, An (film), 161 identical twins, personality and, 87, 88 identity, 83 See also self-concept culture and, 87 managing multiple identities, 101–102 names and, 175–176 of relationships, 26 spirituality as an important part of, identity needs, 8–9 idioms, 53 Ifert, D.E., 31n46 Iizuka, Y., 222n23 illustrator gestures, 223 Ilunga (Tshilubua language), 173 image defined, 100 inaccurate, 101, 102 image management as collaborative, 101 complexity of, 104 defined, 101 disclosing sexual orientation and, 102, 104 fundamental principles of, 101–102, 104 HIV-positive and, 102, 103 managing face needs, 104–106 of multiple identities, 101–102 Imhof, M., 270 immediacy behaviors, 238 immigration policies, 42 implicit communication rules, 20 impressions, formed through nonverbal behaviors, 239–241 see also first impressions In Good Company (film), 329 In the Land of the Deaf (film), 205 in-groups, 42, 43, 46 inclusion, need for, 99 incompatible goals, confl ict and, 375–376 independent couples, 346 Inderbitzen-Nolan, H.M., 95n35 India emotional expression in, 450 high-power-distance culture in, 50 marriage in, 340 naming practices in, 177 spousal choice in, 340 indirect confl ict, 380 indirect perception checking, 155–156 individualistic cultures accommodation in, 399 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-7 I-7 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM individualistic cultures (continued) defined, 48 emotional expression in, 450 handling confl ict in, 386 listening and, 263–264 values of, 48–49 infants, facial expressions in, 237 infidelity, 339, 454 inflection, voice, 227 information concealed through nonverbal communication, 244–246 inconsistency in false, 420 information overload, 272–273 informational listening becoming better at, 278–280 confirmation bias and, 279 critical listening, 268 defined, 267 empathic listening, 268 for substance over style, 279–280 separating what is and is not said, 278–279 Ingham, H., 83 inhibition (display rule), 452 initiating stage of romantic relationships, 343–344 Inman, C.C., 67n73 inspirational listening, 268 instant messaging (IM), 299 instrumental communication, 350–351 instrumental needs, 9–10 instrumental talk, 67 integrating stage of romantic relationships, 344–345 integration (dialectical tensions), 367 intensification (display rule), 451 intensifying stage of romantic relationships, 344 intensity, emotions varying in, 447 intentional messages, 18 interaction constructs, 125 interaction model of communication, 12–13, 13f, 14, 14f interactive context, 427 intercultural communication See cultural differences; culture(s) interdependence confl ict occurring between relationships of, 375, 379 defined, 333 in families, 358–359 intimate relationships fostering, 333, 335 interference, confl ict including, 376 internal attribution, 144 internal causes of behavior, 143, 146 Internet See also online communication hate speech on, 191 physical proximity on attraction and, 299 relationship initiation on, 344 social interaction on, interpersonal attraction, 297 interpersonal communication characteristics of, 25–27 considering the effect you want to create with, 193–194 defined, 24–25 in romantic relationships, 346–351 mistakes in, 194–195 owning your thoughts and feelings for, 198–200 I-8 reasons for importance of, 27 separating opinions from factual claims in, 195–197 speaking at an appropriate level for, 197 interpersonal communication, negative side of alcohol use in relationship confl ict, 382 cell phones and, 23 commitment becoming obsession, 334 deception (See deception) disclosing HIV-positive status, 103 discrimination against Muslims, 43 eating disorders and pressure to be attractive, 244, 245 listening during grief, 284 misperceptions about marginalized populations, 130, 131 offensive language and, 192, 193 road rage, 439 sexual harassment in the workplace, 323, 324 interpersonal confl ict alcohol use and, 382 as natural, 379 characteristics of, 378–383 content, relational, and procedural dimensions of, 379–380 culture and, 386–387 defined, 375–376 differences on how people “frame,” 377–378 example of, 374 metaphors used to explain, 376–377 most common sources of, 383–385 online, 387–388 problematic behaviors during, 395–397 strategies for managing, 397–400 interpersonal needs, self-esteem and, 98–100 interpersonal perception, 122–157 being mindful of perceptions and, 151–153 defined, 123 egocentrism influencing, 140 explaining behavior through attributions, 143–148 fundamental forces affecting our, 132 improving perceptual abilities, 150 negativity bias influencing, 140–142 perception checking and, 153–157 perceptual set influencing, 137–139 positivity bias influencing, 140, 141–142 primacy effect and, 134–136 recency effect and, 136–137 scenario involving, 150–151 stereotyping and, 133–134 interpretation process of perception, 125–126 Interpreter, The (film), 289 interpreting stage in effective listening, 265 interrupting, 275 Intervention (television series), 308 intersex, 61 intimacy defined, 182 language expressed with, 182–184 intimate distance, 231 intimate relationships, 332 See also families; romantic relationships characteristics of, 333 commitment in, 333 dialectical tensions in, 335–337 fostering interdependence, 333, 335 improving communication in, 362–367 investment required in, 335 managing dialectical tensions in, 365–367 realistic expectations of, 365 intrapersonal communication, 25 intrapersonal confl ict, 375 intravenous drug users, intrusive behaviors, 334 investment defined, 335 required in intimate relationships, 335 Inzlicht, M., 255 Ireland, female head of state in, 392, 393t Island, D., 381n14 Ismailji, T., 442n47 Israel low-context culture in, 49 low-power-distance culture in, 50 Iverson, J.M., 223n24 Izard, C.E., 439n27, 465 Jablin, F.M., 319n74 Jackson, D., 17n23, 18n25 Jackson, D.C., 460n142 Jackson, P.B., 295n14 Jacobson, L., 93 James, A., 289 James, D., 275n38 James, L., 439 Japan collectivistic culture in, 49, 172 emotional expression in, 450 masculine culture in, 51 shame in, 446 Japanese language, 173 jargon, 54, 188 Jarvis, M., 347 jealousy defined, 440 emotional, 454 envy vs., 440 gender differences in experience/ expression of, 452–453 relationships involving, 440 sexual, 454 Jeffrey, R.W., 27n38 Jeffreys, A.S., 283n46 Jenkins, L., 165n2 Jensen-Campbell, L.A., 456n118 Ji, K., 128n21 Johari Window, 83–84, 85f John, O.P., 460n143 Johnson, C.E., 415n17 Johnson, C.L., 91n22 Johnson, D.R., 338n9 Johnson, E.M., 351n66 Johnson, M.H., 138f Johnson, T., 236n64 Johnson, W.F., 237n74 Johnston, L., 243n125 Johnston, L.D., 338n11 jokes, 186–187 Jolie, A., 42 Jomier, J., 422n39 Jones, B.C., 227n36 Jones, D.C., 27n36 Jones, E.E., 126n12 Jones, J., 63n62 Jones, M., 410 Jones, S.M., 453n98 Jordan, self-esteem/happiness correlation in, 96t Jorm, A.F., 182n37 Joseph, J., 96n42 journaling, 184–185 joy, 448 Joyner, K., 104n75 Judd, J., 185n44 Judge, T.A., 99n64 Jungle Book, The (Kipling), 174 Jussim, L.J., 134n36 Kabre of Togo, 49 Kacewicz, E., 113n100 Kagan, J., 87n13 Kahle, L.R., 243n122 Kalakanis, L.E., 220, 299n30 Kalbfeisch, P., 58–59, 68–69 Kamakura, W.A., 229n47 Kaplan, D.L., 314n62 Kaplan, E.P., 421–422, 422n36 Kaplan, R.M., 338n6 Kaplan, V., 176n21 Kappas, A., 216n11 Karraker, K.H., 137n45 Kasser, T., 436n5 Katriel, T., 22n33 Katz, L.F., 450n82 Katz, M., 60n49 Katzman, S., 73n100 Kaufman, C.M., 97n43, 119 Kaufmann, G., 420n26 Kawachi, I., 438n23 Kedo, O., 442n52 Keeley-Dyreson, M.P., 246n138 Keepman, C., 442n47 Keith, T.Z., 97n50 Keller, E., 273n30 Keller, K., 186n48 Kellerman, K., 161, 352n72 Kelley, C.M., 140n52 Kelley, D.L., 246n138 Kelley, H.H., 126n12 Kelly, A.E., 113n99, 119 Kelly-Hayes, M., 438n21 Kemeny, M.E., 104n72, 104n73 Kennedy, B.L., 260, 260n3 Kennedy, S., 442n45 Kenny, C., 119 Kenny, D.A., 111n91, 123n1, 161, 349n51 Keough, K., 133n32 Kerr, M., 43 Kerr, N.A., 97n52 Kessler, R.C., 443n56 Ketelaar, T., 456n119, 456n121 Keyton, J., 231n50 Khatri, P., 442n46 Kiecolt-Glaser, J.K., 27n37, 339n13, 381n6, 381n8, 381n9, 393n52, 396n59, 397n60, 405, 438n25 Kiesler, S., 110n87 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-8 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM Kilgallen, D., 69n85 Killough, C.E., 389n44 Kim, C., 381n9 Kim, H., 268n24 Kim, H.K., 338n12 Kim, Y., 436n5 Kim, Y.Y., 387n36 Kimble, C.E., 242n112 Kimmel, M., 57n37, 58n40 Kindler, M., 442n52 kinesics, 223 See also body movement; gestures King, A.C., 296n18, 438n24 King, D.E., 138n47, 438n20 Kipling, R., 174 Kirby, S., 165n1 Kirson, D., 441n41 Kite Runner, The (film), 465 Klein, D.F., 442n44 Klein, L.C., 73n111 Kleiner-Fisman, G., 229n44 Kleiner-Gathercoal, K., 138, 138n46 Kleinke, C.L., 242n118 Kline, S.L., 177n25 Klinefelter syndrome, 61 Klinetob, N.A., 386n28 Klinnert, M.D., 237n74 Klusas, J.A., 113n99, 119 Kluwer, E.S., 351n58, 351n60, 351n67 Knapp, M.L., 37, 218n13, 236, 236n66, 237n67, 241n101, 342n36, 351–352, 352n70, 415n18 Kneidinger, L.M., 226n34 Knott, B., 294n5 Ko, S.J., 157 Koffman, R.L., 451n90 Kohnken, G., 246n135 Koller, S., 440n31 Kolligan, J., 93n27 Kolt, R., 388n42 Koo, J., 39n22 Koper, R.J., 239n83 Korea, 49 Koren, P., 383n22 Kornet, A., 413n8 Kose, S., 442n48 Kott, H.S., 229n44 Koval, J.E., 382n16 Kowalewski, R.B., 7n5 Kowalski, R.M., 443n55 Kratz, D., 289 Kreider, R.M., 353n74 Kring, A.M., 73, 73n104, 73n105, 454n113, 455, 465 Krishnan, K.R., 442n46 Krone, K.J., 319n74 Kronick, R.G., 338n6 Krowinski, A.C., 104n77 Krueger, J.I., 96n38, 96n41, 97n53 Kubany, E.S., 199n65 Kübler-Ross, E., 442n49 Kubzansky, L.D., 438n23 Kuhn, J.L., 268n22 Kuijer, R.G., 98n63 Kunkel, A., 64, 64n68, 79 Kurdek, L.A., 62, 74n113, 341n27, 341n28, 341n29, 341n30, 341n31, 341n32, 384n25, 386n30 Kurogi, A., 387n39 ladder of abstraction, 172 LaFrance, B.H., LaFrance, M., 72n98 Landers, A., 94 Landis, K.R., 295n12 Lane, H., 8n14, 46n13 Lane, J.D., 42n2 Lane, K., 262n10 Langlois, J.H., 220, 299n30 language, 164–200 affection and intimacy expressed with, 182–184 ambiguous, 171 as arbitrary, 167 as bound by context and culture, 172–173 as component of culture, 44 as governed by rules, 167–168 credibility issues with, 179–182 cultural differences in i, 53–54 defamation, 189–190 defined, 165 differing meanings of words, 17 finding the right words to say, 164, 165 hate speech, 190–192 humor, 186–187 improving your use of, 193–200 in low-context cultures, 49 layers of meaning in, 168–170 loaded, 169–170 names and, 175–177 of teenagers vs the elderly, 46–47 power and, 68–70 power of, 174–175 profane, 190–192 slang and jargon, 188–189 symbolic nature of, 166 used to comfort and heal, 184–185 used to persuade, 177–179 varying in clarity, 170–172 words as building blocks of, 165–166 Lany, J., 223n24 Lapitsky, M., 242n108 Lapsley, D.K., 140n50 Largent, R.N., 321n79 Larkey, L.K., 335n1 Larkin, G.R., 437n10 Larose, H., 299n31 Larsen, R.J., 454n104, 456n119, 456n121 Larson, A.D., 220 Larson, C.L., 460n142 Larson, J.H., 128n20 Latvia, female head of state in, 392, 393t Lauzanne, K., 61n51 Lavallee, L.F., 95n32 LaValley, A.G., 185n44 Law Smith, M.J., 227n36 Lazarus, R.S., 436n8, 445n60 learned skill, listening as a, 262–263 Leary, M.R., 8n15, 37, 99n65, 293n3, 443n55 Leathers, D.G., 47n14, 72n93 Leave It to Beaver (television show), 59, 357 leave-taking behaviors, 236 L eDoux, J., 442n51 Lee, C., 172n13, 449n80 Lee, E., 61n51 Lee, F., 49n22 Lee, J.W., 265n18 Lee, W.S., 53n33, 79 Lee, Y-T., 134n36 legal commitments, 333 legal obligations, familial, 356 Legally Blond (film), 37 legislation, hate speech, 191 legitimate power, 391 Leibold, J.M., 42n5, 79 Lemeshow, S., 381n8 Lengel, R.H., 16n22 Lentz, E.M., 221n21 Leonard, K.E., 392n50 LePoire, B.A., 224n25, 228n41 Lepore, L., 133n29 lesbians/lesbian relationships, 61 confl ict communication of, 347–348 disclosing sexual orientation, 102, 104 instrumental talk by, 68 open relationship among, 339 topics of confl ict in, 384 violent confl ict in, 381 ways of handling conflict in, 386 Letellier, P., 381n14 Levenson, R., 349–350 Levenson, R.W., 73n106, 349n54, 349n55, 450n85, 451n86 Levine, R.B., 340n24 Levine, T.R., 6, 265n17, 411n6, 420n31, 421 Levinson, S.C., 173n16 Levitt, J., 42n2 Levitt, M.J., n2 Levy, P.E., 97n43, 119 Levy, S.R., 131 Lewinsohn, P.M., 97n47 Lewis, B.P., 73n111 Lewis, M., 465 Lewis, R.J., 104n77 Lewis, T.L.138f, 138, 138n46 Leyens, J-P., 147n71, 147n72 Liar, Liar (film), 431 libel, 189–190 Liberia, 393t Liden, R.C., 135n39 Lieberman, D.J., 431 Light, K.C., 446n69 liking, 437–438 Lim, T.S., 105n81 limbic system, 448 Lindbergh, A.M., 5, linear manner of communication process, 12 linguistic determinism, 173 linguistic relativity, 173 linguistic styles, gendered, 71 linguistic violence, 70 Linkey, H.E., 242n114 Linville, S.E., 240n96, 240n98 lip piercing, 298–299 Lippa, R.A.68n78 Lippert, T., 112n96 Lippold, S., 233n54 Liss, J.M., 240n99 listening, 258–285 barriers to, 269, 271–275, 277 becoming better at, 277–285 by college students, 260 constructing different meanings and, 259 creating meaning through, 259 critical, 268, 280–282 culture and, 263–264 defined, 259 during grief, 284 effective, 259 empathic, 268, 282–285 importance of effective, 260–262 in the workplace, 261 informational, 267, 278–280 misconceptions about, 262–263 nature of, 259–264 physical health and, 261 problems with, 258 rating our skills in, 261–262 stages of effective, 264–267 time spent on, 260–261 types of, 267–268 listening styles action-oriented, 270 content-oriented, 270 gender and, 276 people-oriented, 270 time-oriented, 270 literal information, 17 litost (Czech word), 173 little white lies, 411 Littrell, M.A., 130n28 Lloyd, S.A., 281n13, 305n46, 381n11, 382n16, 382n17, 382n19 loaded language, 169–170 locus dimension of attribution, 143, 145t Lohan, Lindsay, 19 loneliness, 294 longitudinal study, 183 Longo, L.C., 236n62, 255 looking-glass self, 89 Lopes, P.N., 456n117, 456n123 Lorberbaum, J.P., 442n48 LoSchiavo, F.M., 148n75 Loschiavo, R., 351n59 love defined, 437 liking vs., 437 marriage and, 340–341 passion and, 437 positions of power in marital relationships and, 393 positive benefits of, 446 romantic relationships based on, 340 Love Actually (film), 37 Loving, T.J., 381n8, 393, 393n52 low self-monitors, 92 Low, C.M., 440n36 low-contact cultures, 231 low-context cultures, 49, 50, 387 low-power distance cultures, 50, 394–395 low-stakes lies, 411, 426 lower self-esteem, 95–96, 97 lower-status citizens, 394 Lubbock, Sir John, 132 Lubow, R.E., 422n40 Luchins, A., 135n40 Ludlum, J., 344n39 Luft, J., 83 Luis, S., 299n27 Lumby, M.E., 71n91 Luminet, O., 456n135 Lupfer, M.B., 140n56 Luscher, M., 235n60 Lustina, M.J., 133n32 Luszcz, M.A., 28, 128n23 Lutz, W., 188n55 Lutz-Zois, C.J., 242n120 lying, 409 believing what you say is true and, 412 clues to, 420–423 detected through third parties, 421 frequency of, 410 high-stakes, 410–411 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-9 I-9 10/15/08 10:28:21 AM lying (continued) low-stakes, 411 middle-stakes, 411 not intending to have others believe what you say and, 412 through equivocation, 418 through exaggeration, 417 through falsification, 417 through omission, 417–418 to yourself, 412–413 lying under oath, 411 Lykken, D.T., 87n12, 88 Lyubomirsky, S., 96n39 Mabie, H., 378 Macapagal-Arroyo, G., 393t MacCallum, R.C., 381n9, 397n60 Maccoby, E.E., 56n35 MacDonald, G., 382 MacGeorge, E.L., 64n69 MacIntyre, P.D., 93n28 Macintyre, S., 338n7 Macrae, C.N., 265n16 Maes, A., 275n39 Magee, W.J., 442n50 Magnussen, S., 420n26 Mahmoud, A., 425n54 Mainous, A.G., 438n20 Major, B., 71–72n92, 98n59 Makhijani, M.G., 236n62, 255 Makin, V.S., 187n51 Malarkey, W.B., 381n6, 381n8, 381n9, 393n52, 396n59, 397n60, 405, 438n25 Mallinger, A., 227n37 Malmstadt, J.R., 460n142 managers, attributes of effective, 261t Manheim, S., 301n30 Mankowski, I.A., 85n3 Mannarelli, T., 157 Mannes, M., 458 Mannino, C.A., 351n65 Manstead, A.E.R., 453n97 Manuck, S.B., 438n22 Manuso, V., 255 Manusov, V., 126n13, 143n60, 161 Mao, H.-Y., 405 Maori, the, 49 Maple, T.L., 226n34 Marchall, L.A., 29n39 Marcus, M.G., 176n19 Mares, M.L., 271n25 marginalized groups autonomy face and, 106 feeling misunderstood by others, 129 jokes about, 186–187 misperceptions about, 130, 131 overattribution and, 148 Margulis, S.T., 112n92, 114n104 marital confl ict handled poorly, 395, 398 leading to violence and aggression, 380–381 managed constructively, 383 sources of, 383–384 marital happiness, marital schemata, 345 Marks, S.R., 320n76 Markwith, M., 440n33 marriages arranged, 339–340 communicating intimacy and affection, 182–183 confl ict communication in, 347 divorce and, 353–354 I-10 expected to be permanent, 341 federal law providing benefits to couples in, 342 health benefits of, 338–339 in high-power-distance vs lowpower-distance cultures, 50 love and, 340–341 marital schema and, 345 polygamous, 339 positive behaviors in, 363 positivity/negativity bias and, 141–142 power relations in, 393 retaining birth names and, 177 same-sex, 61, 62, 341 self-serving bias in, 146 spouses sharing exciting play activities in, 362, 363 three types of, 345–346 Marrow, S., 457n137 Mars photograph, 137–138, 138f Marston, P.J., 335n1, 437n11 Martin, D., 58n43 Martin, J., 413n9 Marx, G., 171 Marx, R., 60n49 masculine cultures, 51–52 masculinity, 56–58 affectionate behavior and, 73–74 defined, 56–57 emotional expression and, 454–455 self-concept and, 87 masking (display rule), 452 Maslow, A.H., 10n21 mass communication, 25 material costs of social relationships, 296 material rewards of social relationships, 294–295 Matsumoto, D., 222n22, 448n74 Matsuura, M., 454n106 Matthews, G., 456n122 Mauerer, D., 138f, 138n46 Maurer, D., 138 Mauron, A., 197n64 Mayer, B., 378n4 Mayer, J.D., 456n124, 456n125, 456n126, 456n127, 457 Mayne, T.J., 458n138, 465 Mazur, R.M., 339n16 McAdams, D.P., 101n69 McAdams, Dan, 101 McCabe, B., 344n39 McCaffery, J.M., 438n22 McCain, T.A., 97–298n20, 318 McCann, C.D., 137n43 McCauley, C.R., 440n29, 440n32, 440n33 McClelland, D.C., 456n129, 456n131 McClintock, M.K., 7n5 McConnell, A.R., 42n5, 79 McCornack, S.A., 420n31, 421 McCoy, K., 73n106 McCroskey, J.C., 297–298n20, 318 McDaniel, S.H., 22n33 McGee, R.O., 96n37, 97n46 McGlone, M.S., 187n53 McGlone, R.E., 240n91 McGue, M., 88 McGurk, D., 451n90 McIntyre, L., 89n16 McKenna, C., 362n92, 363 McKenry, P., 338n12 McKenzie, N.J., 7n8 Mean Girls (film), 19–20 meaning assigning to behavior, 126 created through listening, 259, 263 from what you hear, listening and, 259 meaning of words, 17 ambiguity in language and, 171 changing over time, 166 connotative, 168 denotative, 168 situated in the people who use them, 169 words have an arbitrary connection to, 167 Mebêngônkre Indians (Brazil), 298 Media Dynamics, Inc., 272n28 media, changing gender roles in, 59 medical conditions challenge of managing multiple identities with, 102 self-monitoring ability and, 92 medical decisions, marriage benefits and, 342 medical jargon, 54, 188 Meet the Parents (film), 101, 119 Meeus, W., 294n8 Meganck, R., 456n136 Mehl, M.R., 69, 69n81, 69n83 Mehrabian, A., 32, 212n3 Melfi, C.A., 442n45 memory stage of effective listening and, 265 memory, smell and, 229–230 men See also biological sex; gender differences emotional experience in, 453–454, 455 expression of jealousy, 454 linguistic violence by, 70 overattribution and, 147–148, 149 Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus (Gray), 63 Mendelson, M.J., 299n32 Mendoza, E., 240n93 Menon, V., 186n46 meraki (Greek language), 173 Merkel, A., 393t Mesmer-Magnus, J., 96n42 Mesquita, B., 436n9 message action model of communication, 11–12 context dimension of, 17 defined, 11 one-across, 389, 390 one-down, 389–390 one-up, 389, 390 relational dimension of, 17–18 unintentional, 18–19 Messer, S.C., 451n90 Messick, R.M., 307n47 Messman, S.J., 315n67, 385n26, 398n62 meta-communication, 18, 216–217 meta-confl ict, 380 meta-emotions, 449–450 metaphors, on conflict, 376–377 meterosexual, 59 Mettler, D.W., 389n44 Metts, S., 105n82, 112n92, 114n104, 119, 353n73, 417n22 Mexican Americans, 450–451 Mexico high-power-distance culture in, 50 masculine culture in, 51 Meyer, I.H., 104n71 Meyers, M., 108–109 Microsoft, Inc., 212f middle-stakes lies, 411 Mies, M., 392n47 Mihalik, J.L., 242n120 Mikesell, R.L., 398n62 Mikkelson, A.C., 185n44 Mikos, K., 221n21 Milardo, R.M., 309n52 military personnel, posttraumatic stress disorder, 451 Miller, A.G., 409n3 Miller, G., 421–422 Miller, G.E., 381n7 Miller, G.R., 422n36 Miller, L.C., 111n91 Miller-Perrin, C.L., 381n12 Milstead, M., 140n50 mindfulness, of our perceptions, 151–153 Mineo, P.J., 181n32 minority groups see also names of minority groups hate speech and, 191 person-first terminology and, 192–193 self-esteem and, 98 Mirgain, S.A., 349n53 Miro, E., 127n16 mispronunciation, 228 Missing, C., 243n130 Mitchell, K.A., 301 mixed couples, 346 Miyake, K., 227n38 mnemonic devices, 265 Mobbs, D., 186n46 model, defined, 11 models of communication, 11–15 action model, 11–12, 11f interaction model, 12–13 transaction model, 13–14 useful ideas of each, 14–15 Mohlberg, H., 442n52 Moles, A., 239n86 Moller, M., 444n57 Mondloch, C.J., 138n46 money, confl ict over, 376, 383–384 Mongeau, P.A., 344n41 Monloch, C.J., 138, 138f monochronic cultures, 52 monogamy, 339 monopolization error, 194–195 monotone voice, 227 Montagne-Miller, Y., 178n29 Montero-Diaz, L., 240n95 Montesquieu, C.S., 451, 451n87 Montgomery, B.M., 336n2, 366n96, 371 Montgomery, M.J., 320n77, 329 mood, emotion vs., 435 Moore, C., 173 Moore, C.J., 173n18, 205 Moore, F.R., 227n36 Moore, K., 442n46 Moore, M.M., 238n78 Moorman-Eavers, E.R., 242n120 Moran, R.T., 79 Moran, S.V., 79 Morley, J., 228n32 Morman, M.T., 73–74n112, 73n110, 184n39, 300n39, 311n54, 358n84, 371, 454n114 Morris, J.D., 177n26 Morris, M.E., 157 Morris, W.L., 319n24 Morris, W.N., 435n2 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-10 10/15/08 10:28:22 AM Morrison, K., 420n31, 421 Morse code, 166 Morse, D.S., 22n33 Morton, J., 138f Mosher, W.D., 61n59, 63n62 motivation impairment effect, 426 Motley, M., 37 Motley, M.T., 18n24, 18n26 Mouton, J., 397 movement and gestures, 222–224 See also gestures moves toward friendship stage, 316 Mozambique, 392, 393t Mrs Doubtfire (film), 310, 352 Mulac, A., 71n89, 71n90 Muldoon, M.F., 438n22 Mullen, P.E., 73n102, 454n108 Mullett, J., 205 multifaceted aspect of self-concept, 83–84 multiple channels of communication, 15–16 Munoz, J., 240n93 Munson, B., 240n97 Munson, M., 339n19 Murakami, M., 447n71 Muraoka, M.Y., 199n65 Murray, A.D., 68m76 Murray, C., 226n32 Murray, I.R., 237n73, 237n75 Murray, S.L., 140n55 Mursai of southern Ethiopia, 298 Muslims, discrimination against, 43 My Big Fat Greek Wedding (film), 79 Myanmar, 299 Myers, D.G., 85n2, 98n56, 456n120 Myers, H.F., 381n7 MySpace, 299, 344, 453 myths, communication, 20–24 Nader, P.R., 296n16 Najib, A., 442n48 names identity and, 175–176 naming practices, 176–177 popular, over the last century, 176table Napier, A.Y., 364n95 Napolitan, D.A., 147n70 Naqvi, N., 448n72 nascent friendship stage National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), 191 National Communication Association, 20, 27 Native Americans eye contact and, 267 high-context culture of, 49 self-esteem of, 98 nature vs nurture debate, need for affection, 99–100 need for control, 98–99 need for inclusion, 99 need to belong theory, 293–294 Neeley, R., 240n100 negative behaviors, 349–350 negative emotions gender differences in expressing, 73 neuroticism and, 456 reappraising, 460 negatively valenced emotions, 446–447 negativity bias, 140–142, 153 Neimeyer, R.A., 301 Nell (film), 255 Nemeroff, C., 440n34 Neppl, T.K., 68n76 Netherlands, the, 51 neuroticism, 456 New Zealand female head of state in, 392, 393t low-power-distance culture in, 50 self-esteem/happiness correlation in, 96t Newcomb, A.F., 329 Newport, F., 72n96 Newton, D.A., 246n138 Newton, T., 397n60, 405 Newton, T.L., 27n37, 339n13 Nierenberg, G., 212n1 Nietzsche, F., 419 Nilsson, L-G., 42n3 Nin, Anais, 143 Nisbett, R.E., 128n21 Nistico, H., 140n53 no-fault divorce laws, 353 no-touch policies, 225 noise action model of communication, 12 as barrier to effective listening, 271 defined, 12 noninteractive context, 427–428 nonjudgmental listening, 282 nonverbal behavior see also nonverbal communication avoidance, 303–304 confirming messages, 363 confl ict expressed through, 375 displays of sadness, 441 interpreting information with, 265 problematic behavior during confl ict and, 398 nonverbal channels, 213, 218–235 eye behaviors, 221–222 (see also eye contact) facial displays (see facial displays) gestures and movement (see gestures) overview, 234 physical appearance, 232–233 smell, 229–230 touch (see touch behaviors) use of artifacts, 233–234 use of space, 230–232 use of time, 233 voice (see vocal behaviors) nonverbal communication, 209–250 as meta-communication, 216–217 as present in most interpersonal communication, 211–212 as primary means of communicating emotion, 215–216 believed over verbal communication, 214–215 concealing information through, 244–246 conveying more information than verbal communication, 212–214 cultural differences and, 208 defined, 209 emotion expressed through, 237–238 empathic listening and, 285 examples of, 209–210 five characteristics of, 210–217 forming impressions through, 239–241 functions of, 235–246 gender and, 71–74 improving skills in, 247–250 influencing others with, 242–244 interpreting, 210, 247–249 maintaining relationships through, 238–239 managing conversations with, 235–237 reliance on, 210–211 Nora, A., 143n62 norm of reciprocity, 111, 178 Norman, C.C., 362n92, 363 norms, as component of culture, 45 Norrick, N.R., 186n47 novelty-predictability dialectical tension, 337 Nowicki, S., 301n40 nuclear families, 357 Nyberg, L., 42n3 O’Connor, C., 441n41 O’Malley, P.M., 338n11 O’Neal, G.S., 242n108 O’Sullivan, M., 245n131, 246n133, 421n35 obese people, social comparison and, 91 obsessive relational intrusion (ORI), 334 oculesics, 221 Oetzel, J.G., 399n66 Oetzel, J.H., 405 Office of the New York State Comptroller, 44n8 Office, The (television series), 247 Ogden, C.K., 91n22, 169, 169n6 Ohman, L., 42n3 Okabe, K., 387n38 olfactic association, 229 olfactics, 229–230 Oliva, A., 137n44 Oliver, S.J., 455n115 Olsen, M.K., 283n46 Olson, C.M., 127n17 Olson, L.N., 398n63 Omar, A., 425n54 omission, lying through, 417–418 one-across messages, 389, 390 one-down messages, 389–390 one-up messages, 389, 390 online chat rooms, 453 online communication See also Internet, the confl ict in, 387–388 deceptive, 414 emotional expression on, 212f, 452–453 expressing emotions on, 212f hate speech, 191 intrusive behavior on, 334 nonverbal communication and, 211 physical proximity on attraction and, 299 risks of self-disclosure and, 115–116 online relationships emotional closeness through, 294 self-disclosure in, 110 onomatopoeia, 167 open area of Johari Window, 83, 85 open relationships, 339 open system, 358 openness, relational maintenance and, 308–309 openness-closedness dialectical tension, 336–337 Operario, D., 104n74 operational exhaustion, 187 opinions, factual claims vs., 195–197 opposites attract, 301 opposite-sex friends, 314–315 opposite-sex romantic relationships See also heterosexuality; romantic relationships exclusivity in, 339 homosexual relationships vs., 62 ways of handling confl ict in, 386 Orbe, M.P., 377n3 Ordinary People (film), 400 organization stage of perception process, 124–125 Osborn, R.N., 123n2 Othello error, 427 other-adaptors, 224 out-groups, 42, 43, 46 over-benefited, 307 overattribution, 147–148 overweight adults, social comparison and, 91 Oxford English Dictionary (OED), 171 Padaung tribe of Myanmar, 299 Padden, C., 45n11 Paek, S.L., 241n102 Pakistan, marriage in, 340 Palesh, O., 442n47 Panter, A.T., 221n20 paralinguistic cues, 227 paraphrasing defined, 266 understanding a speaker’s message through, 278–279 parental subsystem, 359 parents see also families coercive power of, 391 touching their children, 225 Parigoris, C.G., 177n24 Park, H.S., 420n31, 421 Parker, A., 449n80 Parker, J.D.A., 456n133, 456n134 Parker, J.G., 440n36 Parks, M.R., 7n12, 114, 114n103, 293, 293n1, 294n7, 299n34, 314n58, 329, 344n40 Parrott, W.G., 440n37 Parsons, C.K., 135n39 Pascarella, E.T., 143n62 passion, 437, 444–445 passive-aggressive behavior, 385, 392 patriarchy, 392 Patterson, C.J., 386n32 Patterson, M.L., 255 Patterson, T.L., 296n16 Paul, J., 171n11, 205 Paulsen, A., 7n5 Paulson, R.M., 427n61 Payne, K., 396n58 Pearce, G., 381n5 Pease, A., 54n34 Pease, B., 54n34 peers, friends as, 312–313 Pellander, F., 232n52 Pelosi, N., 392 Peng, K., 128n21 Pennebaker, J., 69n83, 113n100, 185, 451 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-11 I-11 10/15/08 10:28:22 AM people-oriented listening style, 270, 276 Peplau, L.A., 345n42, 381n15, 386n33 perception See also interpersonal perception confl ict in goals and, 376 defined, 123 influences on accuracy of, 127–131 language and, 172 stages of perception process, 123–127 perceptual filters, 16 perceptual schema, 124 perceptual set, 137–139, 151 Perczek, R.E., 296n18 performance, self-esteem and, 97 perjury, 411 Perrett, D.I., 227n36 Perrin, R.D., 381n12 Perry, B.D., 6n3 Perse, E.M., 7n10 person of color, 192 person-first terminology, 191–192 personal appearance See physical appearance personal criticisms, as source of confl ict, 383 personal distance, 231 personal experience, expertise vs., 281 Personal Relationships and Personal Networks (Parks), 293 personal space See proxemics personality defined, 86 emotional expression and, 455–456 identical twins and, 87, 88 self-concept development and, 86–87 perspective taking, 268 persuasion anchor-and-contrast strategy, 177–178 choosing a strategy for, 179 language and, 177–179 norm of reciprocity strategy for, 178 social validation principle and, 178–179 pervasiveness of interpersonal communication, 27 Pervin, L.A., 455n116 Pesuric, A., 456n132 Peterson, G.W., 336n3 Peterson-Lewis, S., 234n57 Petronio, S., 114n104, 348 Pfau, M., 228n42, 242n113 Pfiester, A., 187, 187n53 Philippines female head of state in, 392, 393t high-power-distance culture in, 50 Philippot, B., 436n9 phonological rules, 167–168 physical appearance as channel of communication, 15 attractiveness (see physical attractiveness) interpersonal attraction and, 298–299 inviting a conversation and, 236 judging people based on their, 209 I-12 sociocultural impressions formed through, 241 strong influence of, 232–233 physical attraction, 297 physical attractiveness “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” and, 220 cross-cultural aspects of, 299 cultural differences in achieving, 298–299 eating disorders and pressures regarding, 244, 245 face proportionality and, 218–219 face symmetry and, 218, 219f interpersonal attraction and, 298–299 nonverbal behaviors maximizing, 243 physical constructs, 124–125 physical health See health physical investments, with social relationships, 296 physical needs, communication meeting, 5–7 physical noise, 12 physicians empathic listening by, 283–284 social relationships of, 324 physiological noise, 12 physiological responses to emotions, 442, 444–445 physiological states, 127, 151 physiological traits, 127–128, 151 Piaget, J., 140, 140n51 Pieperhoff, P, 442n52 Pierrehumbert, J., 240n97 Pilington, C., 320n77 Pilkington, C., 329 Pinker, S., 168n5, 174, 205 Pinski, R.B., 296n16 Piot, C., 49n17 pitch, voice, 227 conversation and, 236 deception and, 246–247 deception increasing, 421–422 displays of emotion and, 237 Pitt, B., 42 placater role in family, 360 Plante, T.G., 409n5 Player, M.S., 438n20 Plutchik, R., 448n79 Pointer, M.R., 234n58 politeness deception and, 413–414 lying and, 409 Pollak, K.I., 283n46 polychronic cultures, 52 polygamy, 339, 345 Poortinga, Y.H., 59n46 Popenoe, D., 8n17 Portugal, idioms used in, 53 positive behaviors by happy couples, 349–350 envy as, 441 power as, 390 positive emotions, gender differences in expressing, 72–73 positively valenced emotions, 446–447 positivity handling confl ict with, 383 relational maintenance and, 308 positivity bias, 140, 141–142, 153 possibility, 281–282, 281f postcyberdisclosure panic, 115 posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), 187, 451 posture, 211, 236–237 Pottebaum, S.M., 97n50 Potter, J., 99n66 power as always present, 389 as context-specific, 389 coercive, 391 confl ict influencing, 390 confl ict over, 376 culture and, 394–395 defined, 388 expert, 391–392 forms of, 390–392 gender and, 392–394 handled positively or negatively, 390 language and, 68–70 legitimate, 391 nonverbal behaviors asserting, 238 referent, 391 reward, 390–391 use of time and, 233 power distance, 394 power-imbalanced relationships, 321–322 power/control touch, 226 Prager, K.J., 112n96, 261n7 pragmatic rules, 168 Pratt, M.G., 241n103 Pratto, F., 56n36, 98n62 predictability-novelty dialectical tension, 337 predicted outcome value theory, 302–303 prejudice defined, 130 misperceptions of marginalized populations, 130 Previti, D., 340n23 Priambodo, N., 339n21 primacy effect, 134–136, 152–153 Primal Fear (film), 161 primary emotions, 447–448 Prince (American singer), 176 Prince, L.M., 250n145 principle of facial primacy, 218 principle of least interest, 393 privacy lies to protect your, 415 romantic relationships and, 348–349 self-disclosure and, 115 probability, 281–282, 281f problems, communication’s inability to always solve, 21 procedural dimension of conflict, 380 profanity, 190–192 Project Runway (television program), 215 pronunciation, 228 proportionality, face, 218–219 proxemics, 230–232 attraction and, 299 conversation and, 236 cultural differences in, 231 defined, 230 disability status and, 232 friendship and, 317 gender differences in, 72 in groups, 231–232 pseudolistening, 271–272 psychological constructs, 125 psychological context, 12 psychological noise, 12 psychologically androgynous, 58 public distance, 231 public speaking, 49 Puck, R., 18–19n27 Pulos, S., 446n67 punishment, lying to help you avoid, 415 pupil dilation, deception and, 422 pupil size, 222 Puts, D.A., 227n35 Qian, H., 110n86 quid pro quo, 323 quiet voices, 228 Quintana, S.M., 140n50 quizzes on attitudes about deception, 416 on attraction in your closest friendship, 318 on being altercentric, 141 on expectations of romantic relationships, 343 on factual claims vs opinions, 196 on nonverbal interpretation and expression skills, 251 on self-esteem, 95 on your confl ict style, 401 on your cultural sensitivity, 57 on your emotional intelligence, 457 on your empathy, 32 personality, 66 self-esteem, 95 Rabby, M.K., 344n38, 351n59 Rabin, B.S., 7n6 racial jokes, 186–187 Rafaeli, A., 241n103 Rainville, P., 448n72 Ramirez, A., 124n4 Ramirez-Esparza, N., 69 Ramos, L., 91 Randy, L., 446n67 Rapson, R.L., 465 rate of speech, 228, 237, 243 Rault, E., 422n39 Raven, B., 390 Rawlins, W.K., 294n9, 314n61, 316, 329 Ray, E.B., 5n2 Ray, G.B., 437n16 Reader, W., 299n29 reaffi rmation, 367 realistic expectations, 365 reappraisal, emotional, 460 Reber, J.S., 93n30 rebuttal tendency, 274 recalibration, 367 receivers action model of communication, 12 defined, 12 in transaction model, 13 recency effect, 136–137, 153 reciprocity, in self-disclosure, 111, 112 reclaiming the term, 190 Redeker, G., 275n39 Reeder, G.D., 145n66 reference (Semantic Triangle), 169 reference groups, social comparison and, 90 referent power, 391 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-12 10/15/08 10:28:22 AM referent, in the Semantic Triangle, 169 reflected appraisal, 87, 89–90 Regan, P.C., 437n13 regulators, 224 Reis, H.T., 95n34 Reiss, A., 186n46 Reiter, R.L., 441n42 rejection, after self-disclosure, 114–115 relational dimension of confl ict, 379 relational dimension of the message, 17–18 relational needs, 7–8 relationship maintenance behaviors for, 308–309, 311 reasons for, 304–308 understanding, 310 with co-workers, 320–321 relationships See also friendships; romantic relationships; social relationships abusive, 58, 306–307 communication with (see interpersonal communication) gay (see gay men/relationships) impact of communication on, 4–5 impact of humor on, 186 interpersonal communication improving, 27 lesbian (see lesbians/lesbian relationships) maintaining, with nonverbal communication, 238–239 relational needs and, 7–8 self-disclosure varying among, 109–110 types of, 25 relaxation, nonverbal behaviors and, 238–239 remembering stage in effective listening, 265 Reno, J., 392 Rentfrow, P.J., 86n5 responding stage in effective listening, 266 Reston, A.C., 91 reward power, 390–391 rewards equity theory of relationship formation and, 307 of social relationships, 294–296 relationship maintenance and, 310 Reynolds, R., 352n72 rhymes, as a mnemonic device, 265 Rice, C., 392 Rice, R.E., 294n5 Richard, D.C., 199n65 Richards, I.A., 169, 169n6 Richards, M., 191 Ridge, R.D., 93n30 Riechert, A., 408n1 Rieger, G., 63n60 Riggio, R.E., 249n141, 249n142, 250n143, 250n144, 251, 425n51 Rilke, R.M., 56 Rimé, B., 436n9, 451, 456n135 Rimm, E.B., 438n23 Ritchie, T., 410 Rittenburg, T.L., 187n52 ritualistic touch, 226 rituals, family, 360–361 Roach, M.E., 241n104 road rage, 438, 439 Robbins, B.D., 445n63 Roberts, L.J., 146n67 Roberts, R.D., 456n125 Robins, R.W., 86n7, 99n66 Rockwell, P., 424n48, 426n58, 426n59 Rodgers, B., 182n37 Rodriguez, L.K., 283n46 Rodriguez, Mosquera, P.M., 453n97 Rogers, L.E., 389, 389n43 Rogge, R.D., 382n18 Rohde, P., 97n47 role behaviors, familial, 356 role constructs, 125 role-limitation stage of friendships, 316 Roloff, M.E., 31n46 Roman alphabet, 166 romantic relationships, 332–367 See also gay men/relationships; lesbians/lesbian relationships; opposite-sex romantic relationships change in communication over course of, 26 characteristics of, 338–342 confl ict communication in, 347–348 dialectical tensions in, 336 emotional commitment in, 333 emotional communication in, 349–350 ending, 351–354 exclusive, 339 expected to be permanent, 341 getting to know your expectations on, 343 harmful confl ict in, 381 heterosexual vs same-sex, 62 initiating stage of, 343–344 instrumental communication in, 350–351 interpersonal communication in, 346–351 investments in, 335 involuntary, 339–340 jealousy in, 440 of bisexuals, 63 open, 339 opposite-sex friendships and, 315 permanency in, 341–342 positivity bias and, 140 privacy and, 348–349 problematic behaviors during, 395–397 realistic expectations in, 365 same-sex and opposite-sex, 341 sharing exciting activities together in, 363 sources of confl ict in, 384–385 stages of development, 342–346 voluntary, 339 Roopnarine, J.L., 298n21 Rose, S.M., 315n68, 317n70, 317n72 Roseman, I.J., 438n19 Rosenberg, M., 95 Rosenblith, J.F., 86n10 Rosenfeld, L.B., 112n97 Rosenthal, L., 73n106 Rosenthal, R., 49n22, 93, 93n29, 93n31, 220n18 Ross, L., 146n69 Rothblum, E.D., 341n33 Rothman, A.J., 441n39 Rotundo, E.A., 61n57 Rozin, P., 440n29, 440n32, 440n33, 440n34 Rubenfeld, K., 69n84 Rubenstein, A.J., 220, 299n30 Ruberman, W., 295n11 Rubin, R.B., 7n10 Rubin, Z., 437n15 Rudd, J.E., 29n39 rudeness, eight attributions for, 145t Ruef, A., 73n106 Ruggeiro, V., 280n44 rules explicit communication, 19–20 friendships governed by, 313 implicit, 20 Ruscio, A.M., 443n56 Rushton, J.P., 42n4 Russell, J.A., 237n68, 436n6 Russell, S.T., 104n75 Rust, P.C., 339n17 Ryan, D.A., 389n44 Saaverdra, R., 453n95 Sabatelli, R.M., 359n86 Sabini, J., 438n18, 454n110 sad and anxious emotions, 441–443 sadness as a primary emotion, 448 causes of, 441 defined, 441 depression vs., 442 displays of, 441 gender differences in experiencing, 453 identifying, 458–459 jealousy and, 440 masking, 452 Sagarin, B.J., 454n112 Sallis, J.F., 296n16 Salovey, P., 441n39, 454n109, 456n117, 456n123, 456n126, 457, 458n140 same-sex friends, 314 same-sex marriage, 61, 62, 341 denotative level of language and, 170 same-sex relationships, 341, 345 See also gay men/relationships; homosexuality; lesbians/ lesbian relationships division of instrumental tasks and, 351 heterosexual relationships vs., 62 Santayana, G., 66, 354 Sapadin, L.A., 314n60 Sapir, E., 172, 174 Sapir-Whorf hypothesis, 172–173, 174 Sareen, J., 443n56 Sargent, S., 276 Satir, V., 357n82, 360 saving face, 104–105 Saxe, L., 414, 414n10, 414n11 Schachter, S., 299n33 Schaefer, K., 181n34 schema, perceptual, 124–125 Scherer, K., 237n72 Scherer, K.R., 216n11, 216n12, 217, 245n132, 421n35, 436n7, 448n75 Schermerhorn, J.R., 123n2 Schmeeckle, M., 393n53 Schmidlin, A.M., 71–72n92 Schmiege, C.J., 351n62, 351n63 Schmitt, J.P., 341n31 Schneider, F., 442n52 Schnurr, P.P., 295n13 Schotz, S., 240n92 Schraw, G., 30n43 Schulenberg, J.E., 338n11 Schultz, E.A., 172n15 Schultz, W., 98 Schumacher, J.A., 392n50 Schumm, W.R., 294n5 Schutzwohl, A., 440n35 Schwab, S., 69n82 Schwartz, J., 441n41 Schweder, R.A., 448n77 Schweinle, W., 147, 149 Schweinle, W.E., 148n73, 148n74 Schweinle, W.I., 147–148 Schyns, P.G., 137n44, 442n53 Scott, C.R., 110n86 Scott, I., 235n60 Scully, M.A., 240n90 Seacrest, R., 125 secondary emotions, 448–449 defined, 448 primary emotions and, 448–449 Secrets & Lies (film), 431 secrets, family, 361 Sedikides, C., 145n66 Seeley, J.R., 97n47 Segal, N.L., 88 Segall, M.H., 59n46 segmentation, 366 Seidel, S.D., 242n112 Seinfeld (television program), 210, 228 Seiter, J., 178n29 selection stage of perception process, 123–124 selective attention, 271–272 selective memory bias, 133–134 self, the as a collection of smaller selves, 83, 84f image management, 100–106 self-concept (See self-concept) self-esteem (See self-esteem) self-adaptors, 224 self-assessment, of self-concept, 85 self-awareness, of competent communicators, 30–31 self-concept See also identity “home” identity vs “social” identity and, 82 awareness and management of, 91–94 defined, 83 development of, 86–87, 89–91 three fundamental characteristics of, 83–86 self-directed anger, 438–439 self-disclosure, 107–116 as intentional and truthful, 107–109 benefits of, 112–114 defined, 107 norm of reciprocity and, 111 process of, 110–111 risks of, 114–116 serving multiple purposes, 111–112 varying among relationships, 109–110 varying in breadth and depth, 107–109 self-esteem, 94–100 beliefs on importance of high, 94–95 culture and, 98 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-13 I-13 10/15/08 10:28:22 AM self-esteem (continued) defined, 94 interpersonal needs and, 98–100 life satisfaction and, 96–97 performance and, 97 rating your, 95 relationship between happiness and, 96t self-assessment of self-concept and, 85 social behavior and, 95–96 self-fulfilling prophecy defined, 93 self-concept and, 93–94 self-monitoring, 30, 91–92 self-reporting, listening style, 276 self-serving bias, 145–146 Seligman, M.E.P., 8n16 semantic rules, 168 Semantic Triangle, 169 senior citizens See elderly, the senses as channel of nonverbal communication, 213 hearing (see hearing) memories and, 229 smell (see smell) touch (see touch behaviors) Sensibaugh, C., 314n64 sensitivity to nonverbal messages, 247–248 separate couples, 346 September 11th terrorist attacks, discrimination following, 43 Sex and the City (television show), 59 sex chromosomes, 60 sex differences See gender differences sex, biological See biological sex sexual abuse, touching children in schools and, 225 sexual activity, with opposite-sex friends, 315 sexual attraction, smell and, 230 sexual harassment, 323 sexual infidelity, 454 sexual jealousy, 454 sexual orientation, 61–63 affectionate behavior and, 74 asexuality, 63 bisexuality (see bisexuality) defined, 61 disclosing your, 102, 104 emotional communication and, 73 expressive vs instrumental talk and, 68 heterosexuality (see heterosexuality) homosexuality (see homosexuality) image management and, 102–104 use of term, 56 vocal behaviors and, 240 Shah, N.J., 442n52 Shahani-Denning, C., 243n127 shaking hands, 226 shame, 446 shared knowledge error, 194 shared opinion error, 194 sharing tasks, relational maintenance and, 309 Shaver, P.R., 441n41 Shaw, C., 344n41 Shaw, D., 383n22 She’s the One (film), 371 I-14 Sheldon, K.M., 436n5 shell shock, 187 Shepard, T., 308n50 Sherer, K.R., 237n74 Sheridan, S.M., 389n44 Shetter, W.Z., 167n4 Shimanoff, S.B., 19n28, 313n56 Shore, W.J., 229n46 Shrek (film), 108–109 Shulman, D., 417n23 Shulman, G.M., 236n66 shyness, biological tendency toward, Sias, P.M., 319n74, 320n75 sibling subsystem, 359 Sidanius, J., 98n62 Siegman, A.W., 458n139 Sierra, J.C., 454n105 signaling interpretation of a message, 266 Sikh, the, 177 Silberman, J., 22n33 silence, 229 silent treatment, 229 Sillars, A., 146n67 Silver, N., 21n31 similarity assumption, 47 similarity, attraction and, 299–300, 301 Simpson, M., 59, 59n45 Simpsons, The (television program), 209 simulation (display rule), 452 Sinatra, F., 340 Singapore, high-power-distance culture in, 50 Singh, D., 299n27, 299n28 single mothers, 357 single-parent families, 357 Sirleaf, E.J., 393t Sirsch, U., 90n17 Sixteen Candles (fi lm), 289 skepticism, 280 skill dimension of relationships, 320 Skinner, C.S., 283n46 Skoner, D.P., 7n6, 295, 295n10 slander, 189–190 slang, 188–189 Slatcher, R.B., 69, 113n100 Sleight, C., 268n24 slow speakers, 228, 243 small group communication, 25 small talk, 14 smell as a form of nonverbal communication, 213 attractiveness and, 243 memories and, 229–230 nonverbal communication through, 211 sexual attraction and, 230 Smeltzer, L.R., 274n36 smiling deceptive behavior and, 245, 422–423 gender differences in, 72 Smith, C., 221n21 Smith, C.W., 128n20 Smith, D.A., 386n28 Smith, D.L., 409n2, 431 Smith, R.H., 441n40 Smith, S.E., 182n36, 183, 205 Smith, T.W., 381n5 Smithwick, L.E., 176n20 Smoot, M.T., 220 snap judgments, 156 Snow, S.C., 458n139 Snyder, M., 133n33 Snydersmith, M., 381n9 social anxiety disorder, 443 social attraction, 297 social behavior, self-esteem and, 95–96 social class, power and, 394–395 social commitments, 333 social comparison, 90–91 social differences in emotions, 446 social dimension of relationships, 320 social distance, 231 social emotions, 437 social exchange theory, 304–307, 310 social interaction See also social relationships impact on health, importance of, 5–7 profanity’s effects on, 190 social isolation, social networks online, 453 relational maintenance and, 309 social penetration theory, 107–109, 108f social relationship formation attraction theory on, 297–301 predicted outcome value theory, 302–303 uncertainty reduction theory on, 302 social relationships See also friendships; relationships costs from, 296–297 emotional rewards from, 294 health rewards from, 295–296 importance of, 292 in the workplace, 319–324 material rewards from, 294–295 need to belong and, 293–294 social roles, 129–130 social validation principle, 178–179, 299 socialization expressive vs instrumental talk and, 67–68 gender, confl ict and, 385 societies defined, 41 variations between, 44 sociocultural impressions, 240–241 socioeconomic status, 240, 241 soldiers, posttraumatic stress disorder and, 451 solitary confinement, 5, 293 Solomon, G.F., 447n70 Solomon, S.E., 341n33 Somera, L., 268n24 Soto, J.A., 451n86 source action model of communication, 11 defined, 11 in transaction model, 13 South Korea, 40, 41, 392, 393t Sowa, J.F., 125n8 Spacks, P.M., 188–189n58 Spain, 96t Spain, D., 238n81 spatial use See proxemics spatial zones, 231 Spaulding, L.R., 381n15 speech See talk(ing) speech errors, deceptive communication and, 420–421 Spencer, L.M.J., 456n129 Spender, D., 392n51 Spiegel, D., 7n5 Spinks, N., 263n11 spiritual needs, Spitzberg, B.G., 314n63 Spitzberg, B.H., 29n40, 29n41, 37, 258n1, 334 spoken communication See verbal communication spoken messages See verbal communication spousal privilege, 342 spreading rumors, 189–190 Sprecher, S., 393n53, 437n13, 437n14 Sproull, L., 110n87 Sredl, K., 442n45 Sroufe, L.A., 237n69 St Mary’s College Counseling Grief and Loss Guidelines, 284 stability dimension of attribution, 143, 145t stabilized friendship stage, 316 Stafford, L., 177n25, 308n48, 308n49, 383n20 stagnating stage of relationship dissolution, 352 Stamp, G.H., 31n45 Stand By Me (film), 329 Standing, L., 299n31 Stangor, C., 134n35 Stanley-Hagen, M., 354n78 Starosta, W.J., 57 Steele, K.M., 176n20 Stein, M.B., 443n56 Stein, S., 243n123 Stelbourn, J.P., 339n19 Stelmaszewska, H., 453n92, 453n93 Stengel, R., 415n19 stepchildren, marriage benefits and, 342 Stephens, B.R., 138, 138f, 138n46 Stephens, R.D., 261n5, 261t Stepmom (film), 371 steprelatives, 355 stereotyping cultural, 152 defined, 133 interpersonal perception and, 133–134 on gender and emotional experiences, 455 on gender and listening styles, 276 Stern, L.A., 242n119 Stern, M., 137n45 Stevenson, A., 394 Stewart, M., 410 Stiff, J.B., 268n24 stigmatized people, 7, 106 Stiller, B., 101 stomach stapling, 245 Stone, E., 361, 361n90, 371 stonewalling, 266, 386, 397, 399 stories, family, 361 Stowell, J.R., 381n8 strangers, detecting deception in, 424–425 Strbiak, C.A., 171n11, 205 Street, R.L., 242n111 stress confl ict and, 381 health, social relationships and, 295–296 marital confl ict and, 393–394 student achievement, self-esteem and, 97 stuttering, 102 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-14 10/15/08 10:28:22 AM subcultures, slang and jargon used in, 188–189 subjective aspect of self-concept, 85 submissiveness, 58 subordinates, social relationships with, 321–322 subsystems, family, 359 Sugimoto, F., 447n71 suicide low self-esteem and, 97 shame in Japan and, 446 Suler, J., 115n105 Suler, J.R., 262n10, 387n40, 388n41 Sullivan, L.M., 438n21 Sulzer, J.L., 176n21 Sunnafrank, M., 302, 302n42, 303n43, 303n44 superiors, social relationships with, 321–322 supporting, 266 Suransky-Polakov, S., 42n6 surprise, 447, 448 Survivor (television program), 410 suspicion, detecting deception and, 426 Sutherland, J., 177n26 Sutton-Tyrrell, K., 438n22 Swann, W.B., 86n5 Swartz, T.S., 438n19 Sweden feminine culture in, 51 immigration policies, 42 Sweet Home Alabama (film), 119 symbol(s) as component of culture, 44 in the Semantic Triangle, 169 symbolic nature of language, 165, 166 symmetrical relationships, 389 symmetry, face, 218 sympathetic listening, 268 syntactic rules, 168 system defined, 358 family as a, 358–359 open, 358 Szasz, T., 83 taarradhin (Arabic language), 173 Taforodi, R.W., 95n33 Tafoya, M.A., 185n44 Taifel, H., 42n1 Takahashi, L.M., 7n9, 106n84, 454n106 talk(ing) communication vs., 21 gender differences in, 67–71 talking down, 197 talking over people’s heads, 197 Tannen, D., 63, 282n45 Tarlow, E.M., 85n4 task attraction, 297–298 Taylor, D., 107 Taylor, G.J., 456n133, 456n134, 456n135 Taylor, S.E., 73n111, 104n72, 104n73, 125n10, 279n41 Teachman, B.A., 446n65 Teboul, B., 344n39 Tecce, J.J., 422n37 teenage sexuality, self-esteem and, 96 teenagers, elderly’s co-culture vs., 46–47 telephone communication, tone of voice and, 211 Telesky, C., 296n17 television shows See also individual titles of television shows changing gender roles in, 59 facial expressions showing emotions on, 215 Tellegen, A., 88 Tencer, H.L., 223n24 Terenzini, P.T., 143n62 terminating stage of relationship dissolution, 353–354 terminator statements, 283 terror, 447 Tetlock, P.E., 135n37 Tewksbury, R., 60n50 text messaging, 452 Thayer, R.E., 435n3 Thesander, M., 299n26 The Brothers McMullen (film), 405 thinness, 244, 245 third parties, lies detected through, 420, 421 Thivierge, K.A., 93n28 Thoennes, N., 226n33 Thom-Santelli, J., 410 Thomas, B.J., 427n61 Thomas, L.T., 265n17 Thompson, T.L., 114n102 Thomson, S.C., 279n41 Thorensen, C.J., 99n64 Thornhill, R., 218n15 thoughts, emotions and, 458 Tice, D.M., 97n55 Tiddeman, B.P., 227n36 time confl ict over, 376 cultural differences on orientation to, 52 time costs, with social relationships, 296 time-oriented listening style, 270 Ting-Toomey, S., 87n14, 105n79, 386n34, 386n35, 387n37, 387n39, 394n54, 399n66, 405 Tjaden, P., 226n33 Tkach, C., 96n39 Toffler, A., 272, 272n29 Tolson, J.M., 299n35 Tomasian, J.C., 424n50 tone of voice, 15, 211, 236 Toner, B.B., 455n115 Tossey, S., 226n32 touch behaviors, 224–226 affectionate, 224–225 aggressive, 226 as a channel of nonverbal communication, 213 as channel of communication, 15 caregiving, 225–226 contributing to affi liation, 242 empathic listening and, 285 gender differences in, 71–72 power and control, 226 ritualistic, 226 study of, 224 Touitou, Y., 127n19 Tracy, J.L., 99n66 traditional couples, 346 traditional gender roles, 392 Tranel, D., 442n53, 448n76 transaction model of communication, 13–14, 14f Transamerica (film), 79 transgendered people, 60 transsexual people, 60 Traupmann, J., 437n14 Trevino, L.K., 16n22 Triandis, H.C., 48n15, 112n94, 450n84 Troisi, A., 239n86 Tross, S.A., 226n34 Trower, P., 146n68 Trujillo, H., 240n93 truth bias, 420, 424 Trzesniewski, K., 99n66 Tsai, J.L., 450n85 Tshiluba language, 173 Tucker, J., 425n51 Tugade, M.M., 437n10 Tulsky, J.A., 283n6 tummy tucks, 245 Turkle, S., 414n13 turn-taking signals, 236 Turner’s syndrome, 60 Turner, J.C., 42n1 Turner, R., 295, 295n10 Twenge, J.M., 97n48, 98, 98n57, 98n58, 98n61 twins, personality and, 87, 88 Two Can Play That Game (film), 255 Tyler, J.J., 408n1 U.S Census Bureau, 338n5, 357, 357m83 U.S Department of Justice, 58n39 U.S National Institute of Mental Health, 244, 245 U.S Social Security Administration, 176n22 Uchino, B.N., 381n5 Umberson, D., 295n13 uncertainty avoidance, 52–53 uncertainty reduction theory, 302 under-benefited, 307 understanding stage in effective listening, 265 unfair discrimination, 131 uniforms, 242 unintentional messages, 18–19 United Nations Inter-Agency Network on Women and Gender Equality, 392n49 United States emotional expression in, 450–451 idioms used in, 53 individualistic culture in, 49 inequitable divisions of power in, 392 low-context culture in, 49 low-power-distance culture in, 50, 394 masculine culture in, 51–52 self-esteem/happiness correlation in, 96t women holding government positions of power in, 392 United States General Accounting Office, 342n35 unknown area of Johari Window, 84 Updegraff, J.A., 73n111 upper-class citizens, 394 Uranowitz, S., 133n33 Urberg, K.A., 299n35 Uruguay, 224 Usita, P.N., 7n13 valence defined, 446 emotions varying in, 446–447 Valencia, N., 240n93 validating couples, 347 Valins, S., 445n59 Vallacher, R.R., 235n61 values as component of culture, 44–45 communicating between cocultures and, 46 in collectivistic cultures, 49 in individualistic cultures, 48–49 masculine, 51 of feminine cultures, 51 use of time and, 233 Van de Vliert, E., 351n58, 351n60 van der Meulen, M., 86n9 Van Lear, C.A., 18–19n27, 37, 110n85 van Tilburg, T.G., 294n6 van Vianen, A.E.M., 453n97 Vangelisti, A.L., 361n91, 371, 386, 386n29 Vanheule, S., 456n136 Vazire, S., 69, 69n81 Vera-Villarroel, P., 454n105 verbal aggression, 149, 392 verbal communication, 166 avoidance behavior and, 303 gender and, 67–71 listening and, 259 nonverbal communication believed over, 214–215 Versfeld, N.J., 273n33 vertical banded gastroplasty, 245 Victor of Aveyron, 7–8 Vike-Freiberga, V., 393t Viking Orbiter 1, 137 Vilain, E., 61n58 violence aggressive touch, 226 confl ict leading to, 380–381 linguistic, 70 road rage, 438, 439 visitation rights, 342 Visscher, B.R., 104n72, 104n73 Viswesvaran, C., 96n42 Vitaliano, P.P., 438n24 vividness effect, 279–280 vocal behaviors, 226–229 See also pitch, voice; tone of voice accents, 229 articulation, 228–229 deceptive communication and, 245–246 demographic impressions through, 240 emotion communicated through, 215, 237–238 filler words, 228 identifying a person’s socioeconomic status through, 241 inflection, 227 physical attractiveness and, 243 pronunciation, 228 silence, 229 tone of voice, 15, 211, 236 vocal rate, 228 volume, 227–228 vocal cues, emotions conveyed through, 216 vocal pitch See pitch, voice vocalics, 226 Voelker, S., 449n80 Vohs, K.D., 96n38, 96n41, 97n53 voice tone, 15, 211, 236 volatile couples, 347 Voloudakis, M., 73n108 volume, voice, 227–228 von-Weiss, R.T., 119 Vrij, A., 419n25, 423n43 Vu, C., 95n33 INDEX flo06643_IndexID3.indd I-15 I-15 10/15/08 10:28:22 AM ... } Brief Contents { About Communication Culture and Gender Communication and the Self Interpersonal Perception Language Nonverbal Communication Listening Interpersonal Communication in Social Relationships... Cultural Communication Codes 53 Why Do We Communicate? Communication Meets Physical Needs Communication Meets Relational Needs Communication Fills Identity Needs Communication Meets Spiritual Needs Communication. .. We Communicate Interpersonally? 24 Learn It • Try It • Reflect on It 65 What Makes Communication Interpersonal? 24 Why Interpersonal Communication Matters 27 How Gender Affects Communication 66