Answer Explanations The following model essays earn a 6 on the AWA section, the top score on the written exam. Both essays have most or all of the following characteristics: – ANALYTICAL WRITING ASSESSMENT PRETEST– 218 The content of your written response shows an under- standing and inter- pretation of the issue or argument and the task pre- sented in the prompt. The development of your written response gives a clear and logical explanation of ideas using specific and relevant support. The organization of your written response shows a coherent, orderly, and well-reasoned approach. The expression of your ideas reflects an awareness of audience, a com- mand of vocabulary and sentence struc- ture, and an ability to use language to convey purpose. The use of standard English in your writ- ten response exhibits the correct use of spelling, punctuation, para- graph organization, capitalization, and grammar. ■ Forms a thesis statement that reveals an in- depth under- standing of the issue or argu- ment. ■ Presents a sophisticated and insightful analysis of the issue or argu- ment. ■ Develops ideas clearly and fully. ■ Provides a wide range of relevant and specific evi- dence to support the thesis state- ment. ■ Maintains the focus of the the- sis statement. ■ Uses a logical and coherent structure. ■ Applies skillful writing devices and transitions. ■ Exhibits a mature, sophisti- cated use of lan- guage that is precise and engaging. ■ Has a voice and a sense of aware- ness of audience and purpose. ■ Varies the struc- ture and length of sentences to enhance meaning. ■ Shows control of the conventions of standard English. ■ Has few, if any, errors even when using sophisti- cated language. CONTENT DEVELOPMENT ORGANIZATION EXPRESSION CONVENTIONS Sample Essay — Analysis of an Issue (Score: 6) All for-profit corporations have a moral responsibility to contribute to society by supporting education, non- profit services, or the arts. In today’s increasingly global marketplace, companies that embrace their social responsibilities and empower their leaders and employees to serve local and world communities will reap rewards now and for years to come. These companies will realize that they will reap long-term benefits in morale and bottom-line growth and sustainability by giving their personnel the opportunity to work toward higher goals (social responsibilities) and to make a difference in their lives and the lives of the people around them. Every organization has a legal responsibility to serve its immediate (or local) community as a produc- tive “citizen”by obeying and upholding the laws that govern its operations and by giving its employees a safe place to work. Yet, a select group of modern companies take their social responsibilities a step further, mov- ing beyond mere compliance and into a heightened awareness of social responsibility. These companies oper- ate under “enlightened self-interest.” They realize that what is good for the community and for society is good for the company, and they spend a tremendous amount of effort and money incorporating social programs into their corporate infrastructures and even encouraging and rewarding social involvement and leadership. These companies go beyond merely making grants to nonprofit groups or arts programs. Even more importantly, in addition to monetary gifts to these types of social organizations, they set up hearty volun- teerism programs through which employees at all levels are encouraged to participate in organized volun- teer activities. Typically, they match skills to needs. For instance, researchers at a pharmaceutical company might be organized to help tutor students in science. Although some may argue that corporations have a responsibility only to their stakeholders and their bottom line and do not legally have a responsibility to “do good” in society, they miss the point that social responsibility is in the best interest of the company. Companies that actively participate in social programs aimed at curbing crime, fighting poverty and illiteracy, and teaching skills to those in need reap bottom-line benefits from their social programs every day. These programs not only have a positive impact on the local communities where they are enacted, but they also continue to deliver dividends to the organization in pos- itive public relations, building the image of the company in the eyes of the community and developing a more effective employee base. Corporations that contribute to society benefit on the inside as well. Employees involved in volunteerism programs are more motivated to perform in their business environment because their commitment to oth- ers improves morale and fulfills an important psychological need. These same employees build leadership skills and interpersonal skills while performing their volunteer work, and these skills are not left at home. Fur- thermore, employees are more likely to feel strong loyalty to a company that helps them improve others and themselves. In summary, corporations that take their moral responsibility to contribute to society seriously and develop corporate programs such as volunteerism programs will fare better than their counterparts who shirk their social duties. A healthy community equals a healthy business. Sample Essay — Analysis of an Argument (Score: 6) Location is everything . . . or is it? The owners of an upmarket restaurant are considering a proposal to move next to another store or near a transportation hub in order to expand their customer base. Without offering any evidence, the proposal concludes that moving to a location that offers more exposure is the only way to increase exposure and clientele. Although moving to a new location is certainly one method that could improve the restaurant’s patron base, it is not the only method, nor does it guarantee that numbers would – ANALYTICAL WRITING ASSESSMENT PRETEST– 219 improve. The owners must weigh the costs of moving against staying in their current location and using other techniques to improve business. The first issue is whether location could help expand the customer base. Certainly in the real-estate mar- ket, the mantra is “location, location, location.” If a new restaurant is placed near another store, customers may plan to stop in for a meal before or after shopping or running errands. Similarly, proximity to a trans- portation hub could increase patronage because more people would be aware of its existence and its location would provide convenient access for customers. But a restaurant’s location is only one factor that patrons con- sider when choosing to spend a large amount of money on a meal. For most people, food quality and serv- ice are most important. Atmosphere and cleanliness are other persuasive factors. If a restaurant has excellent food served in a clean, comfortable setting at reasonable prices, chances are patrons will come, even if the restaurant is a little out of the way. Another issue the owners should review is how the cost of a move would affect the bottom line. First, how would new lease or mortgage payments vary from the current costs? Second, moving is an expensive ven- ture, particularly when it involves a lot of furniture and fragile objects such as dishes that need to be packed securely. The owners could be faced with some or all of the following costs: renting trucks, paying movers, buying boxes, purchasing insurance for items in transit, and paying overtime to staff to assist with the move. An even bigger expense could be the loss of income while the move is being made because the restaurant would have to shut down to pack, move, and get reestablished in the new location. Because location isn’t everything and moving costs are so high, the owners should seriously examine ways to increase the customer base from their current location. First, however, they need to determine the true cause of their lack of business. If people just are not impressed with the food or if they feel the price is too high, moving is not going to solve anything and might only exacerbate the problem. If, on the other hand, the owners determine (via customer survey/comment cards or other feedback mechanism) that the restau- rant’s isolated location is the problem, they can draw in new customers in many ways and make people aware of their existence. For example, they could send flyers with special discounts to names on purchased mailing lists or to previous customers, publish ads with coupons to attract new and existing customers, and invite restaurant reviewers from area newspapers to generate interest. With these considerations, I think the owners would be wise to inventory the current customer satis- faction and attempt to increase business from their present location rather than trying to improve business with a move. If customers are currently not satisfied with food quality, price, or service, moving to a new loca- tion is not likely to generate more business, despite the increased exposure. Moving will also increase short- term costs and does not guarantee that a new location will bring more customers. Location is not the only factor these owners need to consider when aiming to expand their customer base, and even if it is the prob- lem, a move is not the only or best answer. – ANALYTICAL WRITING ASSESSMENT PRETEST– 220 The first part of the GMAT® exam is the Analytical Writing Assessment (AWA): a two-part essay exam designed to measure your ability to think critically and convey your ideas effectively in writing. The AWA con- sists of two separate writing questions: an Analysis of an Argument and an Analysis of an Issue. You will have 30 minutes to write each essay. Analysis of an Issue For the Analysis of an Issue essay, you will be presented with a short statement (one to three sentences) about an issue, and you will be asked to take a position on the issue. Your essay should clearly state your opinion and support that opinion with specific reasons and examples. Issue Topics The issue topics can be about anything, including business, social, political, or ethical matters. Whatever their subject matter, issue topics will be general enough so that all test takers can form a reasonable opinion on the issue. You will not need prior or specialized knowledge of the subject to write an effective essay. For example, CHAPTER About the Analytical Writing Assessment 14 221 you do not need specific knowledge of how successful corporations work to answer the Analysis of an Issue prompt from the pretest. Indeed, this prompt is a good example of how open AWA issue questions usually are. Notice, for example, the number of terms that can be defined in many ways, leaving the prompt open to a wide range of responses: “Successful corporations have a moral responsibility to contribute to society by supporting education, nonprofit services, or the arts.” What makes a successful corporation? What sort of responsibility is needed? What kind of contribu- tion must be made? What kind of support is required? This prompt can generate many different responses depending upon the focus each writer chooses. Here is a sampling of the kinds of general issues you might see on the AWA: ■ what schools should teach students (e.g., ethics versus academics) ■ the best methods for protecting the environment ■ the best way to motivate employees ■ the keys to success ■ the best way to improve employee-supervisor relations ■ the impact of technology, consumerism, globalism, mass media, or other predominant features of our culture or times ■ the responsibilities of government, corporations, or individuals ■ the best preparation for the workforce ■ corporate policies, especially regarding employees, privacy, and the environment ■ healthcare ■ advances in science and technology, especially those that impact the workplace Analyzing the Issue The AWA is designed to measure both your writing and analytical skills. Thus, to receive a high score on this essay, you must show evidence that you have carefully considered all sides of the issue and the pros and cons of your position. As you plan your response, consider the following questions: ■ What positions can be taken on the issue? ■ What are the pros and cons of each major position? This does not mean that a good Analysis of an Issue essay will explain each position and present all of the pros and cons for each side; not enough time is available for such a comprehensive review. However, your essay should do the following: ■ Acknowledge the other side, especially powerful counterarguments that might be made by the opposition ■ Concede any serious drawbacks or flaws in your position – ABOUT THE ANALYTICAL WRITING ASSESSMENT– 222 For example, the Analysis of an Issue essay in the pretest skillfully acknowledged the opposition and then presented a rebuttal to that position: Although some may argue that corporations have a responsibility only to their stakeholders and their bottom line and do not legally have a responsibility to “do good” in society, they miss the point that social responsibility is in the best interest of the company. Companies that actively par- ticipate in social programs aimed at curbing crime, fighting poverty and illiteracy, and teaching skills to those in need reap bottom-line benefits from their social programs every day. These pro- grams not only have a positive impact on the local communities where they are enacted, but they also continue to deliver dividends to the organization in positive public relations, building the image of the company in the eyes of the community and developing a more effective employee base. Analysis of an Argument For your Analysis of an Argument essay, you will be presented with a short argument (one paragraph that is one to five sentences long).Your task will be to critique the reasoning behind that argument. In this essay, you should not offer your opinion of the issue in the argument; instead, you must offer your assessment of the argument by evaluating the logic (or lack thereof) of the claims. Argument Topics The argument in your writing prompt can also be about any topic, although a majority of the topics are some- how related to business. Once again, you will not need to have any specific knowledge about that topic to respond effectively in an essay. For example, the Analysis of an Argument prompt in the pretest is business related, but you do not need to know anything about owning a restaurant to successfully critique the argu- ment. You just need to be able to analyze the argument and present your analysis in an organized and engag- ing manner. The following is a sampling of the kinds of general subjects you might find in argument prompts on the AWA: ■ strategies for improving business or services ■ which products or services to choose ■ how to spend funds or save money ■ health and environmental issues ■ societal trends – ABOUT THE ANALYTICAL WRITING ASSESSMENT– 223 . correct use of spelling, punctuation, para- graph organization, capitalization, and grammar. ■ Forms a thesis statement that reveals an in- depth under- standing of the issue or argu- ment. ■ Presents. benefit on the inside as well. Employees involved in volunteerism programs are more motivated to perform in their business environment because their commitment to oth- ers improves morale and fulfills. psychological need. These same employees build leadership skills and interpersonal skills while performing their volunteer work, and these skills are not left at home. Fur- thermore, employees are