WRITE BETTER ESSAYS IN JUST 20 MINUTES A DAY phần 8 pdf

– PREPARING FOR AN ESSAY EXAM– Types of Exams Spend time learning the general features of the essay you’ll be taking Understand the topics and what scorers will be looking for Study the instructions for your essay carefully (they’re all online)—think of how much time you’ll save during the exam if you don’t have to read them Finally, visit the test website to get the most up-to-date information about topics and any changes made to the tests ACT The ACT Plus Writing Test is optional Some schools require the test, so check with those you plan on applying to before you make your decision to register for it The essay is written in response to a prompt concerning an issue of relevance to high school students You’ll need to take a stand on that topic, support your point of view, and present a counterargument Here’s a sample prompt: In an effort to reduce juvenile violence and crime, many towns have chosen to enforce curfews on minors under the age of eighteen These curfews make it illegal for any minor to loiter, wander, stroll, or play in public streets, highways, roads, alleys, parks, playgrounds, or other public places between the hours of 10:00 P.M and 5:00 A.M These curfews also make it illegal for parents or legal guardians to allow minors to congregate in certain public places unsupervised Those who support these curfews believe they would reduce community problems such as violence, graffiti, and drugs, and would force parents and guardians to take responsibility for their children’s whereabouts Those who oppose curfews for minors claim these laws violate the Fourteenth Amendment rights of life and privilege for U.S citizens They also believe that such curfews stereotype minors by presupposing that citizens under the age of eighteen are the only people who commit crimes In your essay, take a position on this question You may write about either one of the two points of view given, or you may present a different point of view on this topic Use specific reasons and examples to support your position Two trained readers will score your essay on a scale of 1–6; the highest possible score is a 12, and the lowest is a Those readers will evaluate how well you: ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ supported your position maintained focus on the topic developed and organized your position logically supported your ideas adhered to the rules of standard written English For the latest information about the test, check www.act.org GED The General Educational Development test contains a 45-minute writing section in which test takers must develop an expository essay that includes personal observations, knowledge, and experience The typical GED essay is about 250 words in length, written on your choice of five topics A list of possible topics, as well as some test144 – PREPARING FOR AN ESSAY EXAM– taking hints, may be found at http://www.cdlponline.org/gedprint/files/GED10.pdf The official GED Testing Service website offers links to your jurisdiction’s testing program, which may differ slightly from that of other states Check www.acenet.edu/clll/ged/index.cfm for the latest information Those who score the GED essay read between 25 and 40 essays an hour They look for: ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ well-focused main points clear organization development of ideas appropriate sentence structure and word choice correct punctuation, grammar, and spelling SAT With just 25 minutes to write, you won’t be expected to turn in a final draft essay when taking the SAT Minor errors in grammar, usage, and mechanics are not weighed against you Scorers instead read the essay to get an overall impression of your writing ability They look for evidence of critical thinking: how well you responded to the topic, developed a point of view, and used appropriate examples and evidence to support your position Is your essay clearly focused, and does it transition smoothly from one point to the next? Do you show evidence of having a varied and intelligent vocabulary? You’ll get either a “response to a quote” or a “complete the statement” prompt The former has one or two quotes on a topic—you’ll need to take a stand on that topic in your essay The latter asks you to fill in the blank in a sentence, and write an essay based on your completed sentence The latest information on the SAT essay may be found at www.collegeboard.com Regents’ and Other Exit Exams More than 25 states, including California, Alaska, North Carolina, and Texas, require a passing grade on an exit exam to be eligible for high school graduation These tests vary, so it is important to get specific information about the test you are preparing to take However, most exit exams allow 60 minutes to develop an essay based on one of a choice of topics A list of topics for Georgia’s Regents’ exam, for example, may be found at www.gsu.edu/~wwwrtp/topics.htm (but remember to check with your school regarding the test you will be given) A typical exit essay is approximately 1,500 words Possible topics include responses to literature, biographical narratives, and even business letters Those who grade exit essay exams ask: ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ How well did you address the topic? Were your ideas organized? Did you develop major points, and support them with details and examples? Were your word choices and sentence structure effective and varied? How consistent was your style (paragraphing), grammar, spelling, and punctuation? Did you express yourself freshly and uniquely? 145 – PREPARING FOR AN ESSAY EXAM– Types of Essays You have been assigned dozens of essays during high school They might have been a response to something you read, an argument about a particular topic, or an explanation of an event or other subject of study In fact, there are countless types of essays However, almost all timed essay exams fall into one of two major categories: expository or persuasive In fact, the ACT and SAT call exclusively for persuasive essays Expository An expository essay gives directions, instructions, or explanations It informs by presenting the writer’s knowledge about the topic to the reader You might be asked to define, compare and/or contrast, or explain cause and effect In fact, think of the verbs used in your topic as key words that clue you in to the fact that you are being asked to write an expository essay These key words include: ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ Compare: examine qualities or characteristics to note and discuss similarities and differences Contrast: examine two or more ideas, people, or things, stressing their differences Define: give a clear, authoritative meaning that identifies distinguishing characteristics Describe: relate the details that make the subject in question unique Diagram: create a graphic organizer that explains your answer Discuss: examine the subject(s) thoroughly, and give a detailed explanation of its strengths and weaknesses Enumerate: determine the points you must make, and present them in a list or outline form Explain: clarify meaning in a straightforward fashion, paying attention to the reasons for a situation Illustrate: use examples, graphic organizers, evidence, or analogies to give meaning or answer a problem Interpret: explain the meaning of something or solve a problem using personal opinions, judgments, or reactions List: see enumerate Narrate: explain an occurrence by describing it as a series of chronological events Outline: describe in an organized fashion, systematically, highlighting only the major points (details not necessary) Relate: explain the associations or connections between two or more things, events, circumstances, or even people; may also be used to mean narrate (see narrate) Recount: see narrate Review: critically examine the topic, event, idea, or thing in question, discussing major points and their strengths and/or weaknesses State: express major points concisely, without using examples or details Summarize: see state Trace: similar to narrate; describe the chronology of an event to reveal its meaning 146 The Best Way to Achieve a High Score The scorers of every type of timed essay agree on one significant point: You must support your essay with details, examples, and evidence Not only will they strengthen your argument, but they will make your writing come alive Common advice for essay exam takers is to include at least one sentence in each paragraph that begins with the words For example Compare these sentences: High school seniors should be allowed open campuses, on which they can arrive in time for their first class, leave during free periods, and come back to school for their other classes There is no reason to treat high school seniors like children by making them stay in school all day when they don’t have classes to attend all day Seniors can handle the extra responsibility High school seniors should be allowed open campuses, on which they can arrive in time for their first class, leave during free periods, and come back to school for their other classes Seniors are given freedom and responsibility in many other areas of their lives; for example, the ability to drive a car Seniors are also permitted to vote, and to prepare for their futures through the college admissions process or vocational training The first example uses generalizations and unsubstantiated claims (“no reason to treat [them] ,” “can handle the extra responsibility”), which weaken the argument The second uses evidence, such as the responsibility of driving and voting, to make the case for open campuses Remember to back up what you say with evidence, details, and other types of examples Persuasive In a persuasive, or argument, essay, you choose one idea and show why it is more legitimate or worthy than another Your purpose is not to merely show your side, but to convince your reader why your side is best In order to convince effectively, you must base your argument on reasoning and logic The most important strategy for the persuasive essay is to choose the side that has the best, or most, evidence If you believe in that side, your argument will most likely be even stronger (although you don’t have to believe in it to write a good essay) An important component of a persuasive essay is the inclusion of other sides or points of view In fact, the scoring rubric for the ACT essay notes specifically that readers will be looking for counterarguments Counterarguments are presented in order to be refuted or weakened, thereby strengthening the case for your side However, it is important to use reasoning and understanding to refute them If you don’t sound fair, or simply present emotional reasons why your side is best, you have weakened your argument You must show that your idea is most legitimate in part because other ideas are weak or incorrect Key verbs that will help you identify a call to write a persuasive essay include: ■ ■ ■ ■ Criticize: express your judgment about the strengths and weaknesses of your topic, and draw conclusions Evaluate: assess the topic based on its strengths and weaknesses, drawing conclusions Justify: defend or uphold your position on the topic, using convincing evidence Prove: confirm or verify that something is real or true using evidence, examples, and sound reasoning 147 – PREPARING FOR AN ESSAY EXAM– Understanding Your Prompt This advice might seem obvious, but it aims to correct one of the most common mistakes made on essay exams: Spend time understanding the type of prompt you’ll encounter Remember that your score depends in large part on how well you address that prompt (both the ACT and SAT essay directions note that an essay written off topic will be scored 0; a GED essay that fails to adequately address the prompt also gets the lowest score—a 1) Preparation materials, both in print and on the Internet, are available for every essay exam, so it’s easy to familiarize yourself with them Many students fail to address the prompt because they didn’t understand what it was asking them to write about The best way to determine whether you understand it is to put the prompt in your own words, and then compare yours with the original Are they nearly the same in meaning? If you have trouble with this exercise, try circling the verbs (key words) in the original prompt These are the same key words you will look for during the exam When you understand the key words, you can more easily write the type of essay required by the prompt Budgeting Your Time As you prepare to take your exam, familiarize yourself with its timing Whether you have 25 minutes or an hour, you should complete three distinct tasks: planning, writing, and revising The writing stage will take the longest, and, for essays that don’t hold grammatical and spelling mistakes against you, the revising stage will be the shortest But every essay should include all three Planning Section covered prewriting Review in particular Lessons and 4, and decide, based on a few practice essays, which brainstorming technique works best for you in a timed situation Knowing exactly what you will when you begin the exam will not only help you save time, but will also take some of the pressure off, too Some exit exams (such as Indiana’s Graduation Qualifying Exam) judge your prewriting notes, outlines, and other graphic organizers, making it even more important to choose a strategy that you know you well ahead of time Even if you are taking the SAT, and have just 25 minutes for your essay, spend the first 3–5 planning Your planning time, no matter which prewriting strategy you use, should involve the formation of a thesis statement and three or four main points Any supporting evidence for, or examples of, those points should be included Once you begin planning, don’t be tempted to switch topics, which will waste valuable writing time Allow a few minutes to think through the topic You may cross off main points that don’t work, or add a new one or two as you go Time Management Set a schedule that allows for each step in the writing process: ■ ■ ■ Spend the first ᎏᎏ of your time planning your essay Spend ᎏᎏ of your time drafting your essay Spend the last ᎏᎏ of your time editing and proofreading your essay 148 – PREPARING FOR AN ESSAY EXAM– Practice Set a timer for five minutes Draft a thesis statement and create an outline for the following sample SAT essay prompt: Some people say there are no more heroes, but I see plenty of heroic people all around me One person I consider a hero is Fill in the blank in the sentence Write an essay in which you explain your answer In Short The time you spend planning for and preparing to take an essay exam can mean the difference between a great score and a poor one Do your homework by researching your exam: Understand how it’s scored, what type of prompt(s) you’ll encounter, what the directions say, and even how much space you’ll be given to write in Learn how to respond quickly to a prompt by practicing: Come up with a thesis statement and outline in just five minutes or less Skill Building until Next Time Gather a couple of sample prompts online or from other books about your exam (see the Additional Resources section for a list of books and online resources) Set the timer for five minutes and practice writing thesis statements and outlines The more you practice, the easier it will be to plan your essay on exam day 149 L E S S O N 19 Drafting, Editing, and Proofreading LESSON SUMMARY This lesson explains how to spend the other three-quarters of your essay exam time: drafting, editing, and proofreading your essay Y ou’ve studied your test and understand what it will look like (including the instructions), and how it will be scored You’ve practiced drafting thesis statements and outlines from sample prompts Now, it’s time to write Drafting Because you’re writing under a strict time restraint, essay scorers don’t expect your essay to be perfect However, they don’t expect a sloppy first draft that needs plenty of revising, either Think instead of creating a “polished rough draft,” writing that’s more refined than a typical rough draft, well organized, and with as few errors in grammar and mechanics as possible 151 – DRAFTING, EDITING, AND PROOFREADING– General Guidelines ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ Use your outline as a guide Don’t go off on tangents, but adhere to your plan If you come up with another strong major point, use it, but don’t freewrite or ramble Separate your major points into paragraphs; this organization will help your readers follow the logic of your argument Avoid unnecessary words, phrases, and sentences Don’t repeat yourself or try to fill space with meaningless sentences such as “This is a very interesting question” or “Different people have different opinions on this subject.” Keep your reader in mind This person will give you a score based on how well you write and how well you addressed the topic Don’t risk alienating or offending this person by using a tone or words that are too formal or too casual Write neatly Your readers can’t score what they can’t read or understand In fact, some exam readers may be unconsciously influenced by your penmanship If two essays are of equal quality, and one is written neatly while the other is in a sloppy, rushed hand, the neater essay will probably receive a slightly higher score Neat handwriting is more reader friendly, and it suggests that the writer has more control over the writing process Editing and Proofreading The revision step is not included in this lesson for an important reason Revising takes too much time and involves too much shuffling of text to be accomplished in the time you’re given to write your essay Recall instead that essay exams should be “polished rough drafts.” There won’t be extra minutes to move sentences from one paragraph to another, delete chunks of information, or add many new points (and even if you did have the time, you’d create a mess that most readers wouldn’t be able to make sense of) That’s why it’s critical to spend time developing an outline and to adhere to that plan once you begin drafting An extra sentence or two inserted later to clarify a point is fine, but there isn’t the space or time to allow for a real revision Instead, focus on editing and proofreading your essay Hints for Taking the Exam ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ Get a good night’s sleep and eat a good meal before the exam Bring all required items (such as writing instruments, identification, and/or a receipt) If there is a choice, read the prompts quickly to find the one you can think of the most examples and evidence for Don’t change your mind after making your prompt selection Underline the key words in your prompt Write legibly You won’t get points for neatness, but if they can’t read it, they can’t score it Wear a watch, and make a plan for budgeting your time 152 – DRAFTING, EDITING, AND PROOFREADING– Some timed exams penalize for grammar, spelling, punctuation, and other errors in mechanics All exams take off points for incomplete answers and failure to address the prompt Leave some time to go over your work and correct or improve any errors Be prepared to spend between 2–5 minutes editing and proofreading your essay Check for the following: In Paragraphs details, examples, and supporting evidence in each paragraph incomplete thoughts rambling, off-topic thoughts paragraph breaks that help the reader see your main points effective transitions between ideas In Words and Sentences complete sentences (no fragments or run-ons) variety in sentence structure agreement concise word choices clichéd, pretentious language ambiguity passive voice proper punctuation and capitalization correct spelling Practice Set aside 20 minutes for this exercise Resist the urge to read ahead and think about the exercise before you’re ready to complete it When you’re ready, set a timer and take the essay exam on the next page Stop! Don’t read the prompt until you’re ready to write for 20 minutes 153 – DRAFTING, EDITING, AND PROOFREADING– “Ignorance is bliss.” Write an essay in which you agree or disagree with this statement Use an example from your personal experience, current events, history, literature, or another discipline to support your point of view Use the following space to write your answer You may use a scrap piece of paper to formulate ideas and take notes Do not write on any other topic; not skip lines 154 – DRAFTING, EDITING, AND PROOFREADING– 155 – DRAFTING, EDITING, AND PROOFREADING– In Short On an essay exam, you need to write a “polished rough draft.” Follow your outline and write carefully but quickly Make sure your thoughts are complete and your handwriting is neat Don’t repeat yourself, or use “filler” words and phrases Choose words that concisely and clearly convey your ideas Leave a few minutes to edit and proofread your essay, correcting any mistakes you might have made Skill Building until Next Time Like all skills, your ability to write well under pressure will improve with practice Chose one of the essay topics from the introduction of this book, set a timer for 30 minutes, and write another essay! 156 L E S S O N 20 Sample Essay Exam Questions and Answers LESSON SUMMARY This final lesson presents two sample essay exam assignments and several sample responses The responses are analyzed to give you a clearer sense of what constitutes a high- and a low-scoring essay W hen you’re faced with any new task, it’s helpful to see how others have performed it That’s why this final lesson is devoted to sample essay prompts and responses There are two sample exams, based on the kinds of prompts used on the ACT, GED, Regents’, and SAT exams Five answers are given that cover a range of scores It’s important to understand why each response received the score it did You can study the scoring rubric for your exam either online or in a book, but you’ll learn more by seeing what essays at each level look like Our rubric (which may be found in the answer key) is based on those used to score the ACT, GED, Regents’, and SAT essays 157 – SAMPLE ESSAY EXAM QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS– Sample Essay Exam #1 The photograph or picture that moved me the most is Assignment: Visual images have the power to inspire thought, evoke emotion, create mood, and even make political statements Complete the statement and write an essay that explains your choice of image You may choose any image, including a family photograph, famous work of art, drawing or painting done by a friend, or even a book illustration Support your choice by using appropriate examples and details Time allowed: 25 minutes Response #1 You might think a memorable picture would have vivid color, an appealing or inspirational theme, or be something you might want to display and look at every day That is not the case with the picture that is most memorable to me Rather, it is a large mural, painted in 1937 by the Spanish artist, Pablo Picasso, to protest the bombing of a small village in northern Spain Surprisingly, there is no vivid red color to show the flowing blood One must imagine this, for the mural is startlingly gray, black, and white But there is no avoiding the horror of the images The figures are not realistically drawn, but are cubist and abstract, and it is apparent that innocent civilians are being slaughtered A mother screams with her mouth wide open, her head tipped back in heart-rending anguish, as she holds her dead baby A soldier lies dead on the ground, clutching his broken sword, and three other people are shown in shock and agony Animals, including a tortured horse and a crying bird, are also portrayed as innocent victims of the massacre Some symbols are open to interpretation What is the meaning of the bull, which seems simply to be observing, or of the light bulb emitting rays at the top of the mural? Does the bull symbolize brute force, and does the light bulb signify that there is hope? Yet there is no doubt that the distorted, horrible images are intended to shock the viewer This depiction of human grief is a profound statement of the cruelty and senselessness of war Limiting the picture to black and white adds a funereal element to the shocking depiction of the catastrophe The memory of the picture cannot be forgotten; it is a metaphor for the senselessness and the horror of war While it was painted to protest atrocities in a long ago war, it is as relevant today as the recollection of the horrors of September 11 Perhaps it should be shown to all those who contemplate starting a war Would it be worth it to have another Guernica? Assessment On a scale of 1–5, this essay received a score of While the writing skills are effective, the organization could be improved For example, the fact that the painting is black and white is mentioned in the second and third paragraphs, both times noting how the color choice adds to the mood of the painting Paragraph has a number of major points; it would be less confusing if each point had its own paragraph There is a clear point of view, and the writer has obviously studied not only the painting, but the language of art criticism as well Examples are well chosen and numerous Word choice is varied and sophisticated, and there are very few errors in grammar and mechanics If the essay were better organized, and the writer had followed the five-paragraph form, it could have received a score of 158 – SAMPLE ESSAY EXAM QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS– Response #2 The picture I remember is Guernica It is by Picasso It is not reelist That means the shapes don’t look real but you know what they are in real life It is in black and white It is not in color like most pictures But it really gets to you It shows people getting killed or who are already killed The images make it so you won’t forget it What this picture does is to make you know that war kills people and it is just awful A baby is killed and a soldier is killed A mother is screaming because her baby is dead It kills people and it kills animals and even if you are not killed you will probly be screaming or crying There are lots of ways that life gets destroyed by war The painting shows many of them This picture could be for any war it doesn’t matter In that way it is a universal message There is not anything in the picture that tells you where it is happening You don’t know who the people are There are wars hapening today People suffer now like in Guernica You remeber it because it makes you upset and you wish there would never be a war Then people wouldn’t have to suffer This picture is memrable because you remember how the people suffered and they probly didn’t anything Assessment On a scale of 1–5, this essay received a Organizationally, it has three paragraphs and each contains a main idea However, two of them also include the introduction and conclusion While they don’t detract from or confuse the author’s ideas, there are numerous errors in grammar and spelling Most sentences are very short, and the lack of variety detracts from the essay A strong point of view is maintained, but it gets lost in the unsophisticated and overly informal vocabulary Sample Essay Exam #2 An influential person is one who leaves a footprint in the sand of our soul To me, the most influential person I can think of is Assignment: Complete the sentence above with an appropriate phrase Then write an essay supporting your completed statement Time allowed: 45 minutes Response #1 Have you ever imagined how your life would be different if a key person were not in it, like a mother, father, spouse, or child? Some people are so integral to making us who we are that without them, our very identity would be changed My grandmother is a key figure in my life who has left an indelible impression on me She is a woman of great influence because of her stability, her work ethic, and her independent spirit Grandma is the matriarch of our family Because she has a close relationship with us and a great deal of wisdom, her seven children and 16 grandchildren often seek her out for advice We look to her for advice on everything from how to potty-train a toddler to how to break up with a boyfriend Grandma relishes the fact that we ask her for advice, but she never offers it without being sought out She is like a rock: never changing My own 159 – SAMPLE ESSAY EXAM QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS– parents got divorced when I was 12, but I always knew that Grandma’s house was a source of stability when the rest of my world seemed tumultuous This sense of security has helped me face other challenges as they come along in life, like when we moved during my freshman year of high school Grandma also inspired me to pursue my goals Because of the trials she faced without shrinking back, I am able to have the strength to work hard and try to realize my dreams Grandma didn’t have it easy Because she was a single parent from a fairly young age, she had to work and sacrifice to support her children She worked full time cleaning offices to save for her children’s college educations She received no help from the outside and was totally independent from her own family’s help Grandma always stressed the importance of education to all of us in achieving our goals Grandma’s example of hard work and her emphasis on education have strengthened me to pursue a college degree, and eventually a PhD Even though I will have to work to get through school, I know that if Grandma worked while raising seven children alone, I can handle taking care of myself Her tireless example is truly inspirational She has also encouraged me in my chosen career, teaching, because she feels it will blend well with family life when I eventually have my own children Perhaps the most significant legacy Grandma has left me is her example of always voicing her opinion despite what others may think Grandma would never bow down to prejudice; she never cared what people would say behind her back In an age where segregation in social circles was common, Grandma’s dinners after church on Sundays would look like a United Nations meeting She would include all races and nationalities, and became close friends with a very diverse group of people If someone tried to put down another race, she would quickly voice her disagreement This refusal to be swayed by “popular” opinion had a huge impact on me, and is a guiding principle in my life today I certainly would not be the person I am today, inside or out, without the influence of my grandmother upon my life I can only aspire to imitate her in her stability, her work ethic, and her refusal to be silenced by other people’s disapproval Assessment On a scale of 1–5, this essay received a It shows an insightful understanding of the assignment The writer chose a strong example of an influential person, and then skillfully developed her ideas with specific examples We learn much about Grandma, and the writer constantly connects these details back to the main idea: that Grandma had a huge impact on her life in three major areas The writer shows an excellent command of language There are no grammatical errors, and she varies her sentence structure to make the reading interesting and enjoyable This essay fully addresses all areas of the rubric in a strong way and is a good example of clear competence in writing Response #2 When someone comes into our lives for a long time, he or she leaves a footprint on our soul I would say the biggest footprint in my soul comes from my little brother, Mario Even though we’ve never had a conversation, Mario is a very big influence for three main reasons Mario is a peaceful person He has a brain disease called lissencephaly That happens when the brain is not bumpy and grooved like it’s supposed to be He has been like this from birth, and there’s no cure But Mario is like a little angel He sits in his wheelchair and plays with his toys Even though he is years old, he can’t walk or talk But he has an inner peace that shines in his eyes He never seems to worry about anything He hardly ever cries or gets upset He isn’t impatient like the rest of us He just takes each day, each hour, each minute as it comes He has taught me about being peaceful no matter what is going on around me 160 – SAMPLE ESSAY EXAM QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS– Mario has also taught me about unconditional love Unconditional love means you love someone not because of what they can for you, or what they have done for you, but just because you love them Mario also has influenced me to enjoy the simple gifts in life I can run, walk, talk, and learn Most of my friends complain about homework, girlfriends, and petty, stupid fights with their friends But Mario, without saying anything, reminds me that it’s all good I have more than he does, and I should be content with what I have I don’t need to have the newest CD or my own car to be happy Not many people have a special gift like Mario in their life I am really lucky because he has influenced me, I think, to be a better person I’ve learned a lot about life from him, how to live and how not to live Assessment On a scale of 1–5, this essay received a The student shows a basic understanding of the assignment, using the example of his brother Mario to develop a response to the prompt There is good development, particularly in the second paragraph, with specific examples However, the second body paragraph, about unconditional love, is unsupported Detracting from the essay are a very basic vocabulary and little sentence variety This is a fair response with good ideas that would benefit from more sophisticated grammar and vocabulary and more concrete support Response #3 My mother is the person who influenced me the most She is a very hard worker She is a very devoted mother, and she is tough My mother works at Macy’s, cleaning the rest rooms and straightening up the stock after the store closes It is not an easy job, she does it from 12 midnight til in the morning My mother wanted to go to college, but her parents didn’t have no money She really want us to all go I would love to make her proud of myself That would be a great reward to her for all she did for us My mother cares about all the things that no other mothers pay no attention to anymore She won’t let me hang out with my friends without calling, no boys in the house when she’s not home, I have to cook and clean, etc She is a very devoted mother One day, some lady almost ran me over in front of my house My mother went out there and tryd to find what the cause was Well, the lady starting screaming at my mother, and she was the one at fault! My mother yelled back and even called the cops on this lady, she isn’t afraid of anybody I think I will probably turn out to be just like my mother, and that would be fine with me Assessment On a scale of 1–5, this essay received a It shows a basic understanding of the assignment, but little development The writer lays out three ways her mother has been influential in her life, but then fails to adequately develop them with examples In the second body paragraph, the writer never makes a connection between her mother’s strictness and being a devoted mother In addition, she doesn’t really discuss how this has affected her There is a weak introduction with no real “hook,” and a short conclusion that weakens the organization of the essay The sentences are simple and contain noticeable errors, particularly run-on sentences Overall, this response shows marginal competence in writing 161 – SAMPLE ESSAY EXAM QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS– Practice Assess the essay you wrote for the practice exercise in Lesson 19 On a scale of 1–5, how would you rate your essay? What are its strengths? What are its weaknesses? Identify the things you did well in your essay Then, list the ways you think your essay could be improved Congratulations! You’ve completed 20 lessons and have learned much about how to write essays that are more effective To see just how much your skills have improved, turn the page and take the posttest You should see a dramatic difference in your understanding of the writing process and in your ability to write clearly and effectively in an essay format To keep your skills sharp, write regularly Start a journal or blog, write letters to friends, take a composition class, or join a writer’s group In addition, pay attention to what you read Your writing will be positively influenced by good writing See the Additional Resources section for suggestions 162 Posttest T o gauge how much your essay-writing skills and your understanding of the writing process have improved, take the following posttest Though the questions differ from those on the pretest, the format and material covered are the same, so you will be able to directly compare results When you complete the test, check your answers, and then compare your score with the one you received on the pretest Your new score should be significantly higher, but if it’s not, review the lessons that teach the skills on which you tested poorly Whatever your score, keep this book on hand for reference as you continue on your academic journey You can use the space on the pages following Part to record your answers and write your essay Or, if you prefer, simply circle the answers directly for Part Obviously, though, if this book doesn’t belong to you, use separate sheets of lined paper to write your responses Take as much time as you need for Part (although 20 minutes is an average completion time) When you’re finished, check your answers against the answer key at the end of this book Each answer tells you which lesson deals with the concept addressed in that question Set aside another 30 minutes to complete Part 163 ... turn in a final draft essay when taking the SAT Minor errors in grammar, usage, and mechanics are not weighed against you Scorers instead read the essay to get an overall impression of your writing... Explain: clarify meaning in a straightforward fashion, paying attention to the reasons for a situation Illustrate: use examples, graphic organizers, evidence, or analogies to give meaning or answer... essay Check for the following: In Paragraphs details, examples, and supporting evidence in each paragraph incomplete thoughts rambling, off-topic thoughts paragraph breaks that help the reader