Chapter 26: Personal Writing: In Your Write Hind 353 2. For letters of dissent • State what editorial, article, or other item prompted your response. • Keep your cool; name-calling works against you. • Stay on the issue; avoid pointless digressions. • Include your name, address, and telephone number. Here's a model letter of praise: Dear Manager: I must acknowledge the beautiful cake your staff baker Jodi Saviuk made for us on February 9, 2003, for our niece's Sweet Sixteen birthday party. The top of the cake had a delicate pattern of pink and yellow flowers joined by a pale green ribbon. The same motif was repeated around the base. The cake was as delicious as it was pretty, as shown the by the fact that our guests kept returning for seconds! In addition, you should know that we put in our order at the last minute. Nonetheless, Ms. Saviuk found the time to bake and decorate our cake. Considering how busy your bakery is, we know that this entailed a great deal of extra work on her part. She made it seem easy, but we know that she worked very hard for us. Erica Bakery is fortunate indeed to have such a talented and pleasant baker as Ms. Saviuk. You can be sure that we will come to Erika Bakery for all our cakes, cookies, and breads— especially our special occasion cakes! Sincerely, Sammi Weinstein E-Mail: Instant Gratification The Internet is a vast computer network of computer networks. It's composed of people, hardware, and software. With the proper equipment, you can sit at your com- puter and communicate with someone any place in the world as long as that person also has the proper equipment. You communicate through e-mail, short for electronic mail. For electronic newbies out there, e-mail is so easy, cupcake. It's also a lot less expensive than telephoning! tok Part 6: In Your Write Hind Internet mail uses a hierarchical system of names to You Could Look It Uo make sense of the millions of computers served. The ~' name of each computer (or "domain") contains from two to five words or abbreviations, separated by periods, with the top of the hierarchy at the right. The follow- ing figure shows the hypothetical Internet address of Bob Smith, managing director of Acme Incorporated: Electronic mail (e-mail) is the transmission of messages over a communications network. user ID; identifies the user's personal mailbox indicates type of organization; ".com" The Internet address, up close bsmith@admin.acme.com- is Commercial; some other domains „™A ^nn^^ni ' T include .edu (education) and >ecifies the company nam and appropriate division cind personal I specifies the company name ".gov" (government) Take My Word for It Want to e-mail the world's movers and shakers? You can look up their electronic mail boxes in the e-mail phone book E-Mail Addresses of the Rich and Famous (Addison- Wesley, 1997). President George W. Bush is at president@whitehouse.gov, for instance. Boot Up First of all, don't be seduced by the seeming informality of the medium: Write all e-mail as you would any important written communication. Follow these steps as you write e-mail: 1. Draft the e-mail. Working offline, write one or more rough drafts. Resist the temptation to toss off a quick note. Once you push that "send" button, you've lost the chance to revise. As with all types of writing, your audience's expectations determine your tone and diction. For example, when using e-mail or real-time communication ("instant messages"), you may be tempted to write informally, overlooking some of the accepted conventions of grammar, usage, spelling, and punctuation. Resist the temptation. If I had a dime for every e-mail that contained a crucial typo, I'd be sitting on a tropical isle right now, enjoying one of those drinks that comes with a little umbrella. Chapter Z6: Personal Writing: In Your Write Hind 355 2. Write a subject line. The subject line is a brief description of the message. An effective subject line grabs your reader's attention and summarizes the content of the e-mail. As an added courtesy, if your message doesn't require a reply, type FYI (For Your Information) at the beginning of the subject line. And while we're here, if necessary, change the subject line when you reply. Any change in topic requires a change in the subject line. This helps your reader identify your purpose and topic at a glance. 3. Use order of importance. Place the most important facts first. These might include results or recommendations, for example. Busy readers will appreciate your consideration—and you'll get better results. 4. Be brief. Write concise messages and make your point fast. In general, make your sentences and paragraphs shorter than you would in a letter, memo, or other offline communication. In addition, skip lines between paragraphs rather than indenting to make your e-mail easier to read. 5. Make your purpose clear. Be very clear why you're sending the e-mail. Are you just saying hello to an old friend? Do you want the reader to make a decision? Do you expect a telephone call? Don't make the reader hunt for the message. 6. Edit and proofread. As with any written communication, e-mail can become a legal document. Therefore, before you send your message, review it carefully to make sure it conveys your precise meaning and is free of errors in grammar, spelling, punctuation, and usage. 7. Always sign your e-mail. Never assume that your recipient knows your iden- tity from your screen name. Think Before You Flame If you use e-mail (and you will soon if you don't already), consider these implications: 1. Because writers using e-mail feel as if they're speaking, they tend to be less con- cerned with spelling, grammar, usage, and punctuation. But readers judge e-mail as they would any written document. Errors reflect badly on the writer. 2. E-mail can be sent to others online or printed and passed around the office, ^jjjgmm You Could Look It Up house, or community. This magnifies the potential exposure of any errors in the document. Flaming is the term for sending rude e-mail messages. 356 Part 6: In Your Write Hind 3. In addition to style, the informal nature of e-mail leads some people to write things that are better left undocumented. This can cause embarrassment—and worse. 4. Intra-office e-mail is a permanent record. It can be used in legal proceedings. 5. One wrong keystroke, and your e-mail can be sent someplace you don't want it to go. Take My Word for It Sometimes I think e-mail is like the Hotel California: You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave. The folks who have spent too much time online in- vented the following smiley faces (called emoticons) to convey a light tone for infor- mal communications. Read these sideways: :-) basic happy smiley face ;-) winking smiley face :-( sad face :-D laughing face :-X lips-are-sealed face :-C really bummed :-/ skeptical %-) bleary-eyed These cutsie-pie symbols are not appropriate for business communication. The Least You Need to Know • Friendly letters share personal feelings and information among friends and family. • Social notes relay an invitation or refuse one and express gratitude, congratula- tions, or condolences. • Letters of opinion express viewpoints. • Get wired; anybody who's anybody is on the Net. Appendix Glossary adjectives Words that modify—describe or limit—nouns and pronouns. adjective clause A clause that describes nouns and pronouns. adverb clause A dependent clause that describes a verb, adjective, or other adverb. adverbial phrase A prepositional phrase that modifies a verb, adjective, or adverb. agreement Means that sentence parts match. Subjects must agree with verbs, and pronouns must agree with antecedents. antecedent The noun the pronoun stands for. appositive A noun or a pronoun that renames another noun or pronoun. appositive phrases Nouns or pronouns with modifiers. bias-free language Uses words and phrases that don't discriminate on the basis of gender, physical condition, age, race, or anything else. case The form of a noun or pronoun that shows how it is used in a sen- tence. Case is the grammatical role a noun or pronoun plays in a sentence. English has three cases: nominative, objective, and possessive. clause A group of words with its own subject and verb. collective nouns Nouns that name a group of people, places, or things. Examples of collective nouns include class, committee, flock, herd, team, audi- ence, assembly, and club. Appendix A complex sentences Sentences that have one independent clause and at least one dependent clause. compound sentences Sentences that have two or more independent clauses. compound-complex sentences Sentences that have at least two independent clauses and at least one dependent clause. conjugate To list the singular and plural forms of the verb in a specific tense. conjunctions Words that connect words or groups of words. conjunctive adverbs Adverbs used to connect other words. Conjunctive adverbs are also called transitions because they link ideas. connotation A word's emotional overtones. dangling modifiers Words or phrases that describe something that has been left out of the sentence. denotation A word's dictionary meaning. dependent (subordinate) clause Part of a sentence; it cannot stand alone. diction A writer's choice of words. doublespeak Artificial, evasive language. elliptical clauses Clauses that intentionally omit words for conciseness. form letter A prewritten, fill-in-the-blank letter designed to fit standard situations. gerund A form of a verb used as a noun. grammar A branch of linguistics that deals with the form and structure of words. indefinite pronouns Pronouns that refer to people, places, objects, or things with- out pointing to a specific one. independent clause A complete sentence; it can stand alone. indirect objects Tells to whom or for whom something is done. infinitive A verb form that comes after the word to and functions as a noun, adjec- tive, or adverb. interjections Words that show strong emotion. Often, interjections are set off with an exclamation mark. jargon The specialized vocabulary of a particular group. Glossary 359 linking verbs Words that indicate a state of being (am, is, are, and so on), relate to the senses (look, smell, taste, and so on), or indicate a condition (appear, seem, become, and so on). mechanics Involves aspects of correct writing format, such as spelling; punctuation; use of abbreviations, numbers, capitalization, and italics. metaphors Figures of speech that compare two unlike things. The more familiar thing helps describe the less familiar one. misplaced modifier A phrase, clause, or word placed too far from the word or words it modifies. mixed metaphors A combination of images that do not work well together. They occur when writers string together clichés. mood Shows the attitude expressed toward the action. It refers to the ability of verbs to convey a writer's attitude toward a subject. noun clause A dependent clause that functions as a noun. nouns Words that name a person, place, or thing. number Refers to the two forms of a word: singular (one) or plural (more than one). parallel structure Means putting ideas of the same rank in the same grammatical structure. participle A form of a verb that functions as an adjective. There are two kinds of participles: present participles and past participles. phrase A group of words, without a subject or a verb, that functions in a sentence as a single part of speech. predicate adjectives Adjectives separated from the noun or pronoun by a linking verb. Predicate adjectives describe the subject of the sentence. predicate nominative A noun or pronoun that follows a linking verb. A predicate nominative renames or identifies the subject. prepositional phrases Groups of words that begin with a preposition and end with a noun or a pronoun. prepositions Words that link a noun or a pronoun to another word in the sentence. pronouns Words used in place of a noun or another pronoun. redundancy Unnecessary repetition of words and ideas. relative clause An adjective clause that begins with one of the relative pronouns. 360 Appendix À run-on sentences Two incorrectly joined independent clauses. A comma splice is a run-on with a comma where the two sentences run together. sentence A group of words that expresses a complete thought. sentence coordination Links ideas of equal importance. sentence fragment A group of words that does not express a complete thought. sexist language Language that assigns qualities to people on the basis of their gen- der. It reflects prejudiced attitudes and stereotypical thinking about the sex roles and traits of both men and women. simple sentence A sentence made of one independent clause. slang Coined words and phrases or new meanings for established terms. split infinitive Occurs when an adverb or adverbial phrase is placed between to and the verb. style A writer's distinctive way of writing. subordination Connecting two unequal but related ideas with a subordinating con- junction to form a complex sentence. tense Shows the time of a verb. tone The writer's attitude toward his or her subject and audience. usage The customary way we use language in speech and writing. The correct level of usage is the one that is appropriate for the occasion. verbal A verb form used as another part of speech. verbs Words that name an action or describe a state of being. voice The form of the verb that shows whether the subject performed the action or received the action. writing A way of communicating a message to a reader for a purpose. Appendix Model Documents Use these models to help you create winning business communications. Resumes Model resume for an entry-level financial services position. 362 Appendix fi Charles Rozakis Street Address Anytown, City Zip Code Home: (516) 555-5555, School: (609) 555-5555 crozakis@princeton.edu Education Princeton University, Princeton, NJ AB Economies, June 2003 September 1999-Current • Senior Independent Work in Internet Business Models • Finance, Financial Accounting • Advanced Macro- and Microeconomics, Econometrics and Statistics • Public Finance and Tax-Related Economics, Law and Economics: Introduction to Property, Tort, and Criminal Law • Computer Science: Algorithms and Data Structures, Programming Systems Job Experience Morgan Stanley, New York, NY Summer Analyst, Prime Income Trust Group June 2002-September 2002 and June 2001-September 2001 • Built financial models using Microsoft Excel, created presentations for prospective clients, researched the growth of the loan market, reconciled accounts and closed trades. • Learned a great deal about leveraged loans and portfolio management. Gained a broad-view understanding of how the market works overall, and a close-up, hands-on experience managing accounts on a day-to-day basis. AirClic, Inc., West Conshohocken, PA Intern, Wireless Engineering Division August 2000-September 2000 • AirClic builds bar code scanners into wireless devices such as cell phones and Palm Pilots, linking print media with an interactive, online databases. • Created working demos of scanable advertisements, performed internet research, and assisted in creating presenta- tions for client corporations. Johns Hopkins University, Center for Talented Youth Teaching Assistant: Mathematics June 2000-August 2000 and June 1999-August 1999 • CTY Instructors and TAs teach highly intelligent young people fast-paced, high school-level courses. In one three- week session, a student usually covers a year's worth of material. • As a TA for the Math Sequence course, helped students work at their own pace and explained topics they found difficult. Leadership Experiences • Director/Producer See How They Run play, Wilson Blackbox Theater (9/00-12/00) Directed 9 actors and 12 crew members; oversaw all aspects of the production; managed a budget of $2,000. • President (2001-2002), Treasurer (2000-2001), FireHazards a cappella group • Business Manager (2000-2001) and member, Koleinu a cappella group • Treasurer (2000-2002) and contributor, Princeton University Distractions puzzle magazine • Disk Jockey, 103.3 WPRB, weekly radio show (Princeton area) • Achieved the rank of Eagle Scout, after eight years in the Boy Scouts of America Computer Programs In-depth knowledge of Microsoft Excel, Access, Powerpoint, Outlook and Word. Also worked with Portfolio Management Database, Wall Street Office, PCDOCS, Netscape, and numerous online services including Intralinks, LoanX and LPC's LoanConnector. . five words or abbreviations, separated by periods, with the top of the hierarchy at the right. The follow- ing figure shows the hypothetical Internet address of Bob Smith, managing director. images that do not work well together. They occur when writers string together clichés. mood Shows the attitude expressed toward the action. It refers to the ability of verbs to convey. magnifies the potential exposure of any errors in the document. Flaming is the term for sending rude e-mail messages. 356 Part 6: In Your Write Hind 3. In addition to style, the informal