The Weakness Of Strength Scott Johnson doc

The Weakness Of Strength Scott Johnson Copyright 2012 by Scott Johnson Smashwords Edition Table Of Contents Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Bullies Chapter 1 Many sins that humankind commit truly make me sick to my scar covered stomach. One of those sins is abuse of power. From the schoolyard to the Police force to the Government I despise seeing the strong prey on the weak. What really lies behind the mask of a bully is fear. Fear that they are the ones who will appear weak. So due to their own insecurities they feel it gives them a license to be a complete D*** or B**** I believe bullies are created and not born. This comes back to the parent or another older influence, IMO In the case of a bully, it is usually the father or some other dominant male figure that is involved with the child early in life Your mother, sister, Aunt, grandma, wife, girlfriend or another female can also bully you There are plenty of female bullies as well. Nevertheless, in most cases, this comes from men. Reflections of our environment. This dominant figure talks roughly to the child, he makes him do things for him or give him things and if the child is reluctant then the dominant male threatens the child with physicality or he actually uses physicality. Verbal abuse also plays a large role. This is the same mentality behind a mean dog. If you hit the dog, abuse it, and keep it isolated from love, do not be shocked when it turns on you or attacks someone else. It is only doing what it was taught. It is reflecting the coldness of its environment. When the person does this on a consistent basis to an impressionable youth, the youth will reflect one of three personalities, IMO. #1. The child becomes the fearful type. Always afraid and never stands up for themselves. This goes on in their life until the boiling point is reached and they absolutely explode or implode. In either case, it is the extreme; there is no middle ground. They either implode and kill themselves or they explode and kill others. Both of these extremes have the bully to blame at the root The bully did not physically make the bullied pull the trigger on themselves or others; but they were directly responsible for what led to it. I have a line in a song that says “Sometimes the killer aint always the shooter”. If someone kills him or herself or shoots up a school or place of employment because of relentless teasing or bullying, then the bullies are also guilty. #2. The child eventually stands up for itself and the bullies back off. The child knows what was being done to them was wrong and they stopped it, but they did not join the dark side. They will not allow themselves to be bullied and they do not bully others. They usually find themselves standing up to bullies for other people due to the fact they have a hate for the injustice and they feel it is a duty to intervene. #3.The child becomes a bully. The mirror image of whoever made them that way. The cycle continues. This personality type is made over and over and over again. This is not always intentional though A lot of bullying falls into the “Making them tough” category Many people do not even realize that they are making “bullies” because they feel they are just making the kids more rugged for life. If you want to teach them how to throw down for protection, then train them. Doing it with random punches and name-calling is not just making them tough; you are making a future A-Hole and creating resentment within the person you are doing it to. The behavior you are teaching is learned, so who did you like that? You are turning them into what you think you are training them to handle You are making them the same type of person you are making them tough enough to go against You are also screwing the child's social life up; they will not have any true friends or good honest loving relationships. There is a huge difference between having true friends and friends who hang out with you because they are scared of you. They will end up having a bunch of “Yes men” as “friends” and if they treat their girl as they do others, she will end up hating him as well. WHY? Because bullies are A-holes. Nobody really likes or likes to hang out with A-holes If you do, then you are an A-hole also or you are a “brownnoser” and need to reconsider your position in life. So am I against toughness? Not in the least. I am not weak and I am not telling anyone else to be. I am able to view things differently now. I have learned to look beyond the present and see how we are affected in the future by where we come from or where we are. I understand that mental toughness is what will ultimately get you through life. My uncle would always tell me that some people have strong backs and weak minds. I understand that now. If your goal is to make the child tough or stronger physically, there is nothing wrong with that. Men need to be strong, we need to be able to do hard work and handle the evils of life. Put them on weight training, get them out in the yard to work, Play sports HOWEVER, DO NOT NEGLECT THE MENTAL TOUGHNESS! You must also train your mind as hard as your body. You do not see many people who have both attributes. You got either a real strong person who is not that smart or a real smart person who is not that strong. So if you are trying to make somebody tough, go for it! However, realize there are different ways to make someone physically tougher other than punching them in the arm and telling them to get you a beer and quit acting like a lil b**** Or “fag” or lil girl. Give them a toughness that will equal integrity, strength honesty and intelligence. Train them across the board, so they are mentally and physically able to handle life and handle it with Respect. If you were not raised like this, be a Rebel, break tradition. There is much more to being a man than the ability to kick someone's ass. Although that does come in handy when those skills are needed. When NEEDED. Now allow me to address any bullies that may be reading this right now. What you are doing is wrong and it will come back on you eventually. There is ALWAYS someone tougher out there and one day you will meet that someone. As I said in the beginning, Life has a way of exposing you. What you do to and how you treat others will either reward you or haunt you in your lifetime. One day when I was in high school, I came up the stairs and was blocked by a large group of people in the hall. In the middle was my friend and he was in the face of a “Nerd” I remember the nerdy dude was looking real embarrassed and scared with his head down. Then my friend backhanded him in the face. The crowd was like “Ohhhhhhhhhh”. Some started laughing, others shaking their heads in disgust. The crowd broke up and I went up to my friend and asked him why he did that. The dude was soft. I could not grasp why he was screwing with him. He did not even have a good answer to give me. He offered some predictable “He's a b****” line or something My friend walked around with his chest puffed out like he was Kong. He had a rep for being a “bad ass” gangsta And I catch him in the hall pimp slapping a tall, skinny, nerdy guy. I lost a ton of respect for him that day. There was no sense in it He ended up looking like a punk to me because he abused his strength over someone who was weaker. Now the person who was hit in front of everybody has to deal with classmates teasing him, feeling like a loser in front of the girls and his self-esteem is also negatively affected. Now his playground becomes full because of this fool. There was no sense for him to have been put in that situation to begin with Chapter 2 When you people do B.S. like this to look tough or to strike fear, you are really just exposing your own weakness. You are really making yourself look like a B**** Like a coward. Am I wrong? You rarely see a bully walk up to someone bigger or stronger than himself or herself and try that nonsense. Because the bigger and stronger could whoop your ass, so you choose to mess with the smaller and weaker to give yourself an inflated ego and aura of toughness You are really just showing the real, who and what you are. You expose yourself Especially, when beating up the gay dudes. In many ways, that is the same as beating up a chick. There is no honor or sense in that at all. Some of you bully the handicapped or “Retarded” kid You must be a real low life to pick on someone dealing with those issues. In some cases, you are one head injury away from that yourself No matter the size of the animal, you back it into a corner; it will fight you to the death Every time you pick on someone weaker or you keep up with the name calling or harassment , You are pushing that person into that corner and once they get there , after all of the abuse that has been piled up on them , You better be ready for the fight of your life when they decide to fight back Many of these kids are smarter than you; they just do not have the physical means or A-hole nature to match up. This is why they use their intelligence and plan elaborate schemes to kill everyone that has wronged them. You are leading people down this path by your actions, WAKE UP! In addition, if the people kill themselves, you will deal with that to. Do not think you will not, you will not escape the haunting until you make it right. They will eventually pay you back One way or another. There is no reason to run around acting like a D***. There is no point in it. Think back to when it was happening to you, you could not have liked the feeling of someone being abusive. Who does? Who wakes up in the morning and says “I hope somebody treats me like S*** today! I hope they do it in front of other people and I hope they hit me and call me names! I can't wait for this day to start!” Nobody does this Do not be that person who screws everything up for everyone else. The one always starting something. The one always running their mouth about how bad ass they are. The one you cannot take anywhere If it does not come back on you now, it will later in life. Either way, you get back what you give out. So give out your best JUST BE COOL! When you are cool, it benefits everyone. Everyone can relax and enjoy themselves. They can have a great time and make some great memories, including you. JUST BE COOL! If everyone was cool and we treated each other right, there is no telling how far we could progress as humans. You now have the opportunity to make the decision to STOP being an A-hole or Bully You can stop now and be cool or continue and find out the hard way that what I am telling you is the truth. I am not making this stuff up y’all, the way you treat each other will come back to visit you. Let me come at you like this before I leave. You obviously have something about you that can earn true respect if you used it right. So instead of being your average idiot bully, be a leader There are enough Villains in the world We need heroes. We need men and women who do not judge or condemn another because of race, looks, or economic status. We need the strong to be examples of bravery and leadership, not examples of cowardly abuse of their attributes. You have the opportunity to break this cycle. You are an individual; you do not have to follow the family tradition of being an A-hole. (No O’Doyle) Start your own tradition of being cool and level headed. You can achieve a lot more in this world with friends than you can with enemies. Everyday you are blessed to wake up; you have a choice. You know right from wrong. Make the right choice Use your muscles, your mind, and your voice for Justice, peace, and progress. This is true power my friends Finally to those that are being Bullied. I am hoping that my words cause a revolution with how people think. In the meantime, I am going to tell you this. The best way to get a bully off your back is to stand up for yourself. Plain and simple. If that means finding your guts, tightening your fist and nailing this person straight on the tip of their nose with everything you got, then so be it. I am not an advocate of violence but I am also not an advocate of extortion or being humiliated on a daily basis either. Pick your poison I was talking with one of my friends about their memories concerning our Jr. High. This was one of his memories of his first year there. “But about Hutch, man I remember my first year like it was yesterday. I really didn’t have friends; I was a loner, always getting punked and pushed around by a group of white boys for being Mexican. I never said anything, just kept to myself, until half way down the year I got tired of that s***. I recall the day it all stopped. I was at lunch, the only seat was next to the group, and they would not let me sit down. They took my tray and pushed me back and I fell; it was so embarrassing. I went to the bathroom, cleaned myself off, and was thinking, “this is the last time”. My next class was with the same group. At first, I was going to leave school but I didn’t, I faced them. I got to class and one of the guys was in my seat, laughing and saying that they didn’t want me in that class. I went up to him and asked for my seat and he said “NO what are you going to do?” Before he finished that line there was a right hook going right to his nose and I didn’t stop; the other guys were just watching. They broke us up, the teacher came in, and no one said nothing. But after that day, I felt like the s*** Nobody ever messed with me again. That is my first year at Hutch man ” Some parents would have me to tell you to speak with your teachers first, then tell the principal or someone in authority. To get your parents involved and that violence is not the correct way to handle the situation. Great advice! I agree. So, do all of that first and if for some strange reason it does not work Punch them. You may get your ass kicked or you may kick their ass Either way, you are going to let whoever it is know that you are not going to live in fear any longer. A family friend once told me “There are those who learn by feeling and those who learn by hearing” Some people just need to feel you are serious. If you do not stand up for yourself, people will continue to take advantage of you. If someone is making fun of you, you can laugh with them about yourself and take away that power. You can pick out one of their flaws and crack back. You can smile and say, “I love you” and keep it moving. Or you can just ignore them completely Once they see how these words upset you, you give them the power. So either come back at them with a better diss or say nothing at all. I suggest going up to them and telling them you need to speak with them in private. Get them to themselves and tell them what's up Ask them to chill out, let them know it isn’t cool with you to do that. Talk with them one on one People are more likely to be themselves when it is one on one. There is no crowd to back them up and there is no ego to be inflated. It is just you and them. Words these are not reasons to kill yourself or others. This is where your mental toughness comes in. This is why you are stronger and more intelligent than the people who use these tactics against you. However, if someone is laying hands on you, that is a different story. When I was young, I had an older friend named “Juice” tell me this “I don't care if they are six feet tall with trash can arms, if they touch you, you fight back” Therefore, you have a choice to make. If you have gone through the proper channels, and you have talked to this person one on one and things have not gotten any better Then you must stand up for yourself. Some bumps and bruises heal a lot faster than years of emotional abuse. Handle a bully as quickly as possible; do not let it linger on. I was picked on in school every now and then. It sucks. Occasionally, I will think about it and wish I had done things differently. Those “Why did I let so and so do that” moments. Nevertheless, many times, it does not even have to get physical. One time in jr.high, I brought two packs of gum. I opened one in front of this football player who used to mess with me. I knew he would demand some gum from me. So when he saw me open the gum, he told me to give him some. So I did. What he did not know was the gum I had given him was chewable Exlax (Laxatives). It hit him after school during football practice. After a good colon cleanse, this cat did not bother me anymore. I have had a few instances where dudes kept bothering me until I got in there face and told them and showed them I was not scared of them. After that, they were cool and no punches had to be thrown. As long as you keep letting them hit you or take your money or make fun of you and you do not stand up for yourself somehow, it will not stop. In a strange way, you are enabling the A-hole within them. Confront your fear or live in it. JUST BE COOL! Realize that life runs so much smoother for everyone involved if you act like you got some sense. None of us should ever see or hear of anyone killing themselves or others over bullying. The power to make change lies within you. The power to break that cycle is in within you. Use your power for good! JUST BE COOL! Sincerely, Scott Johnson Friday, May 07, 2010 7:58 pm . kill themselves or they explode and kill others. Both of these extremes have the bully to blame at the root The bully did not physically make the bullied pull the trigger on themselves or others;. being done to them was wrong and they stopped it, but they did not join the dark side. They will not allow themselves to be bullied and they do not bully others. They usually find themselves standing. for other people due to the fact they have a hate for the injustice and they feel it is a duty to intervene. #3 .The child becomes a bully. The mirror image of whoever made them that way. The