MY WIFE AND IRVING THE DOORMAN HAVE GOT A PRETTY SWEET DEAL: ALL THEY HAVE TO DO IS NOTHING, a nd they get hot, fresh food delivered to them several times a day Of course, they have to be content with eating, say, fried chicken and nothing else for a month as I test a recipe, but, all in all, they’ve pretty much got it made So you can imagine my surprise one day when I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife cooking, and my even greater surprise when I realized she was cooking pasta—in our smallest pot, and at a simmer The water barely covered the noodles as she stirred them to keep them submerged “You can’t that!” I exclaimed in horror “Obviously, my diminutive wife, you haven’t cooked a lot of pasta in your time Unless you use a giant pot of water at a rolling boil, your pasta will stick together The starch will become too concentrated It will cook unevenly It will become mushy It will be nine different sorts of horrible, each one worse than the one before It is scientific fact that you will end up with an inedible starchy, sticky blob.” “Is that so?” was all she said as she turned back to the pot Needless to say, my wife was right: the pasta was fine (though I declined to eat any more than a single tester piece, citing potential paradoxes in the space-time continuum as my reason) Indeed, she has precedence for her method ...NOTHING, a nd they get hot, fresh food delivered to them several times a day Of course, they have to be content with eating, say, fried chicken and nothing else for a month as I... test a recipe, but, all in all, they’ve pretty much got it made So you can imagine my surprise one day when I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife cooking, and my even greater surprise when I realized she was cooking. .. realized she was cooking pasta—in our smallest pot, and at a simmer The water barely covered the noodles as she stirred them to keep them submerged “You can’t that!” I exclaimed in horror “Obviously,