1.2 Discourses on the Ideal Malay Woman: On Motherhood
1.2.2 Inspirational Worker, Educator, Mother: Wearer of Many Hats
One of the websites which purports to target Malay Muslim women is blessedummi.com. The blog in the website is managed by a young Singaporean Malay Muslim woman who was a former teacher. Thus far, the “Inspirational Ummi Series” which features the writer interviewing inspirational mothers is the mainstay of the blog content. It is interesting that the creators of this site chose the Arabic term Ummi to identify the mothers interviewed. Even the writer chose to call herself Umm Muhaimin which means the “Mother of Muhaimin” (her son‟s name) instead of signing off with her real name at the end of every article. The writer of the blog saw the primary identity of herself and the women she interviewed as mothers. This echoes Al-Hashimi‟s (2003) notion that the ideal woman‟s principal identity is that of a mother. Furthermore, the title of the series in the blog supports the writer‟s intention to showcase exemplary women who can juggle between work, family and devotion with ease and thus should be emulated.
The representation of such women is similar to those depicted in Berita Harian.
One interviewee Raudah Laza, a businesswoman, mother and teacher is emblematic of the type of women chosen to be interviewed for the blog, “I
6
enjoyed wearing many hats as I believe that there is a reward for all that I do for the sake of Allah”.1 So, for inspirational Ummi like Raudah it is only natural that her role model is her mother who has “sacrificed many things for me”. She is also awed by her colleague who can seamlessly juggle work, a Doctorate and still have time and energy for children exclaiming “I don‟t know how she does it!” From such interviews, I noticed how inspirational women are mothers who are successful at their jobs yet they are always able to prioritize their role as mothers.
This is what a good mother is and a good mother is the ideal Muslim woman.
Such need to continuously represent remarkable Malay mothers then explains why an article which first appeared on productivemuslim.com has gained traction, circulating through numerous other faith based websites.2 It was even featured on a Muslim Mothers Facebook Group Discussion page which is meant to be a platform for ordinary, everyday Malay Muslim women to share their experiences of maternity and motherhood.3 The article is titled “How I‟m Trying to Raise 8 Intelligent, God-Conscious Children: Interview with Sharifah Mastura Al Jifri”. The interviewee is a Singaporean Malay Muslim. She dispenses knowledge on how she was able to homeschool 8 children in the Arabic, Singaporean and British curricula whilst memorizing the Quran, furthering her
1Umm Muhaimin. 2014. “Inspirational Ummi Series: Raudah Laza. Retrieved from:
http://blessedummi.com/inspirational-ummi-series-raudah-laza. Accessed on November 20, 2014.
2 Chinoy, Zaynab. 2015. “How I’m Trying To Raise 8 Intelligent, God-Conscious Children: Interview with Sharifah Mastura Al-Jifri” Retrieved from: http://productivemuslim.com/interview-sharifah- aljifri/ Accessed on March 1, 2015. I came across this article in the course of making revisions to my thesis.
3 Facebook is a popular social media platform.
7
studies and teaching at the same time. She does this without ever breaking a sweat or needing any help as can be seen from her account of her typical day:
It‟s breakfast, showers and learning time from 6:30-11am.
The key to this is multi-tasking. Depending on the children‟s ages, my life is full of setting one child some writing at his desk, sending one to the shower, helping one to get dressed, reading a book to a little one while breastfeeding the baby. It‟s an endless stream of running around until everyone‟s had breakfast, showered and changed. When everyone‟s ready, the children then sit to listen to me reading them a book they‟ve chosen. They take turns to choose a book every day. Because of this, the children can‟t wait to start work with mummy. Then they all do their portion of reading, writing, learning numbers, Qur‟an and Iqraa‟ and we always finish off with some exciting craft work. It might be painting, sticking or making things. The children would take turns to come to me for Qur‟an, Iqraa‟ and reading Peter and Jane (graded reader) while I monitor the rest in their maths or writing etc.4
She then credits her thirst for knowledge and spirituality as the reason for her ability to juggle her work, further her education and care for her family. From the local daily to the internet, much of what is written about Malay Muslim women is idealized. Like Sharifah Mastura Al Jifri and Ustazah Datuk Siti Nor Bahyah Mahamood, the ideal Malay Muslim woman is a married woman with children. The ideal Muslim mother is then symptomatic of the ideal Muslim woman. She is able to balance between her home and working life yet is aware of her principal role as a mother. As a mother, she is adept at ensuring her children are instilled with both spiritual and secular knowledge so that they are equipped for the modern world and the Hereafter. It is for this reason that
4 Iqraa is a book divided into six sections which aim to introduce children to the Arabic script.
8
productivemuslim.com featured Sharifah Mastura Al Jifri as a personality mothers should aspire to.
The presence of a dominant discourse on the ideal Malay Muslim woman is evident. She is a mother who is able to balance between work and family life yet always prioritizes the latter. Much of this discourse then relies on privileging the voices of „supermums‟ or celebrities. This silences the perspectives of ordinary Malay Muslim women. I then wondered whether such representations are also present in texts about Malay Muslim maternity which targets ordinary, everyday Muslim mothers as readers.5 What soon became evident was how like the websites and newspaper articles, the books on Malay maternity depicted an image of the ideal.