APPENDIX 2 : CLARIFYING THE WHOLE ESSAY
Men build the house and women make it home
In order to enjoy the happiness of the family, both the husband and the wife have to join hands, which means men build the house and women make it home. Men and women have different duties but lead to the same purpose.
Firstly, commonly men are considered as the people who bring home with money. It is the money that supports the life of a family and ensures the stability of a family. However a family is a living entity which needs both money and love.
Secondly, a good family should be built on love, which comes from women. The existence of the mother in a family is very important not only because of the good meals, the orderliness from her but also because of her love, sympathy and support.
Notwithstanding the responsibilities of each family member, the sharing with the jobs both domestic and social is necessary, which can strengthen the relationship among family member.
In conclusion, I would like to stress that all these actions will make a family happier also help children grow up in a loving and responsible environment. And in the future they will be active doers for building the house or making it home.
(200-word essay) Homework:
Have students with low level rewrite the essay by replacing the bold- italic words.
Have students with high level rewrite the essay by replacing the underlined sentences
Writer’s opion
The topic
The problems to be discussed
The topic sentence
Transition sentence
The topic sentence
Transition sentence
The topic sentence
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State the problems
outlook for the future
A family is a base for the society
The prosperity of family contributes to this of society. Therefore, it is said a family is a base for the society. It is in the family that supports children’s physical and mental development.
To start with the physical aspect, children are brought up with enough healthy food and nice clothes.
Like a plant which needs water and sunlight, mind is very important to the development of children besides physical aspect.
In the second place is the mental aspect: children are taught not only the natural virtues such as the sense of responsibility, the respect of dignity, tolerance and piety but also religious matters. However, not every child is covered with parental love owing to war, deadly diseases and even their parents’ failure of marriage.
In contrast, children without parents they should be collected and educated by parental educators so that they can fulfill their true potential.
To conclude, it is clear that the physical and mental aspects enable
Writer’s opion
Transition word
The topic
The problems to be discussed
The topic sentence
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The topic sentence
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State the problems Transition word
In recent times, there is more and more violence at school.
What are the causes of this? How to do with these problems?
In the past years there has been an increasing violence happening at schools not only in town but also in rural areas . This essay will discuss the reasons for this and how its disadvantages effect on society.
The reason s for this tendency belong to family and school . First, it is the increasing divorces that children lack of love and care from their parents. In addition to this, the curriculum at school seems not to focus on helping children gaining cardinal virtues such as love, forgiveness and sense of honour. Last but not least, students both male and female play computer games with too many fighting scenes. Students need be passionately cared for by their parents and teachers in order to grow up in a balanced way.
Conversely , violence developing at school causes so many problems to students and society . One of the possible ways to combat the problem is to cover every student with love and tolerance especially the child whose family is disorder.
Secondly, there should be more lessons about cardinal virtues rather than science lessons.
Finally students should be taught how to manage their time. A student needs to become a good civilian before an intellectual civilian.
To sum up, there is an expanding trend of violence to school. However, the bad effects resulting from school violence on students themselves, on family and on society are possibly satisfactorily tackled if the people involved in pay some more attention to these.
(242-word essay)
The thesis Present situation here
Present situation
there
Explanation of reasons Topic sentence
Transition
Providing solutions Topic sentence
Transition
Transition word
Restating the main points in different wording
Should students get part time jobs?
In foreign countries , it is very common when students get part time jobs because it is one of the programmes at school. However, the situation is different in Vietnam . Most Vietnamese students do nothing but focusing on their studies.
This essay will provide some advantages and disadvantages of getting part time jobs.
To begin with the application of theoretical knowledge to realization. The students with a part time job can have a chance to practise the knowledge that they have studied at school.
Therefore, they get much usefully practical experience during their time at university.
However, the realization of knowledge is not the only.
Apart from that, there is also a social advantage. Taking a part time job is the time for students to accumulate some social skills. For example, a student who works at a restaurant can learn many life lessons such as communication skill, persuasion skills and confidence.
In contrast, a part time job can cause some problems. First, doing a part time job takes time.
Second, they attract so much importance to earning money rather than studies.
As previously stated, doing a part time job can bring many advantages to stduent.
Notwithstanding, there should be a reasonable
The thesis Present situation there
Present situation
here
Explanation Topic sentence
Transition
Providing solutions Topic sentence
Explanation
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Restating the Topic sentence
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Châu đức, ngày 14 tháng 12 năm 2015 Đánh giá, xếp loại của Đơn vị Người viết SKKN,